Dreams That Fall Apart By Luke's Dragon


A/N

It's been a while since I wrote a new chapter for this Fic, it's not like I've abandoned it or anything I'm just not in the mood to write romance or angst at the moment. Anyway although this fic is (one day!) going to be a Yamasuke this chapter has a distinctly Taito and Takesuke theme to it. Also I know I suck at writing sex scenes, I guess it's something you never get taught so I've got to learn from experience.

Disclaimer

…Look I've said it so many times and everyone knows the score buy now, surely it's pointless to tell everyone I don't own it.

Chapter III- Forsaken Hearts

~~~ An Abandoned Summer Camp 12km outside Tokyo. 20:#$~~~

Wishing he knew someone who could fix his clock, Matt Ishida pulled into the car park for the second time in as many weeks of the summer camp where everything had started. It was kind of strange to think that he hadn't been here for so long, but then again what would the point have been? He hadn't needed to revive his childhood memories and dreams; he had been living them. Sad how soon friendships he'd thought would last forever just faded into the air. He knew now Sora wasn't coming back, she had called him that evening and explained the whole sorry situation to him. He knew he should feel angry, sad, rejected but it just didn't come. If anything he felt a sense of freedom that he thought had deserted him. He felt pleased too, pleased that Sora had found someone who she could love, maybe once he wanted the two of them to live 'happily ever after' but even before she left he'd known that was never going to happen. Now though it was all over and he had come running back to the beginning, like some lab rat trapped in a maze or something. Trapped in his memories and promises, trapped in a prison of his own making that he couldn't escape from even if he had wanted to. Trapped in a memory of forsaken lovers and broken hearts, trapped by the face he saw whenever he closed his eyes. Imprisoned in a memory by the name that seemed to be whispered on the warm summer winds that blew all around him, the name of a soul he wished sometimes that he'd never met and then a moment later wished he could still be right besides. Taichi

~~~ Takaishi Apartment 20:20 ~~~

TK was feeling a little put out as he settled down for an evening of Playstation gaming, ever since Kari had got a new job and been out all night, every night he was starting to get a little lonely. He couldn't complain though, the two of them needed the money if they were ever going to move out of their parent's places and get an apartment together. Still he was quite relieved when he heard a knock on the door, the stupid level seemed to cheat anyway.

TK was taken aback when he opened the door to see Davis standing there. He hadn't seen much of Davis lately and wondered if maybe he had upset him or something. Whatever, he was still pleased to have any sort of company, although by the look in his friends eyes Davis seemed a bit too preoccupied to want to do anything that was much fun.

TK invited Davis in and fixed them both a drink despite the fact he could tell that the goggle boy wanted to talk about something he was making no effort to start any sort of conversation. TK had tried in vain to start small talk but after being greeted by a few one word answers or monosyllabic grunting sounds he started to give up any hope of a civil conversation unless he took action.

"You know Dai most people don't just visit to sit in silence"

"Sorry"

"Or get one word responses"

"Sorry"

"Look Dai, I know you well enough to know something's not right"

"No, you don't know me at all"

"I know you don't like to admit when you like someone, that's it isn't it?"

"Maybe"

"…Look Dai, me and Kari are really happy, after everything she's been through what with Tai and everything she doesn't need…"

"Woh! You think I'm still after Kari!"

"That's not it?"

"No, I wish it was, it'd be so much easier if it was a girl…I…I mean Kari"

"What did you say…You mean it's not a girl?"
"…"

"Does anyone else know?"
"Know what?"

"That you're gay?"

"…No, so don't tell anyone"

"Come off it, you know me better than that"

"Yeah"

"So who's the lucky guy?"
"I don't wanna say"

"…Oh"

"…" The conversation appeared to reaching another dead end, TK was fairly sure he was either meant to scream in terror or hug Davis and tell him he'd always be there for him but somehow that didn't seem right. He was fairly sure he knew who Davis' crush was but it didn't seem right to say anything else. The silence was still there and it was annoying him, especially since there seemed to be so much left unsaid between them.

"There's more isn't there Dai?"
"…No…well yes…I don't want to say"

"Dai come on tell me"

"You won't like it…I'd like to kiss you…er…please"

"What?"
"Told you that you wouldn't like it"

"No it's not that, I want to…no I don't want to. What am I saying?"
"TK I shouldn't have said anything"

"I…I love Kari"

"I know"

"Then why am I going to do this?" TK turned to face Davis and before either of them knew what they were doing they had locked lips and very exploring each other's throats. TK couldn't help thinking that this was so wrong, he loved Kari and wanted to stay with her forever, ever since high school she had never looked at anyone else. Now here he was with his shirt being taken off and his best friend running his hands up and down his chest. Actually thinking about it Davis wasn't really his best friend, they hadn't spoken or been particularly close to him and now this guy who used to annoy him, who used to be his rival for Kari was slowly moving his hands into his trousers and undoing the zipper.

Strange, TK thought how at the oddest of times, like right now as they both stood naked staring into each other's eyes. He wondered if Matt had ever felt this confused that time with him and Tai, whether he too had asked himself what the hell he was doing about to 'make love' if that was the right term with a goggle boy who used to annoy the hell out of him. Heh, maybe it was a family trait. He'd always thought that his first time would be with Kari. Hell they'd even promised each other that their first time would be together. They'd always pictured an evening from a dream, magical. romantic, passionate. Not this, not some one-night fling with someone he didn't give a damn about, and who didn't give a damn about him either. Although he could have sworn maybe they both felt differently as Davis let out an involuntary gasp of pleasure and pain as TK broke his promise to Kari.

~~~ Ishida Apartment, 4 years ago ~~~

Matt Ishida ran the comb through his hair again; he'd checked his hair gel, added extra hold mousse and found out his hottest outfit. He noticed with a glance in the mirror that it was very black, black trousers, black shirt, even black underpants, of course if things turned out the way he planned all of it would end up in a crumpled heap on the bedroom floor. It seemed a little crazy that he was getting so worried about tonight it wasn't as if it was anything new. After all he and Tai had been together, sort of, on and off ever since they were at high school. It had never been a storybook romance like Matt would have wanted, they had to be so careful not to let anyone else know and they seemed to split up every week, but somehow it was enough. Although maybe after tonight everything would change, they were both older now, older wiser and more mature. He shook his head; Tai was never going to be mature no matter what happened. Tai was always going to be the same reckless hot head that he had been when they had first met, but that was okay too, or at least that was they way things were so he might as well put up with it. Maybe he was being too romantic about it, maybe he was starting to believe all those soppy lyrics he sung, that if they gave each other their word and made a promise that it was going to last forever that it would. Stupid really that sex would change anything between them, that they would be stronger because of it, that maybe it would mean something…and yet.

And yet here he was, trembling like a coward, waiting for Tai to show up like some heroine waiting for her dream date on prom night. Grinning to no one in particular it struck him how everyone always took him to be the feminine one in the relationship. He usually just laughed it of, saying it was just because he was so much prettier than Tai, which tended to make Tai sulk, but it was just the way it was. He didn't mind one way or the other, but Tai did, maybe it was stupid to just play along, act weak and submissive just for Tai but he didn't mind, although he knew it was going to be him who woke up sore tomorrow morning. Perhaps one day he'd find someone who wanted him to take charge, but that would mean leaving Tai and that was something he didn't want to do. Something he couldn't imagine happening, true it wasn't perfect and it wasn't the way either of them would have planned it but it was how it was. He was startled to here a knock on the door, opening it he looked straight into the eyes of his lover.

"You look wonderful" Tai whispered as he walked in, shrugging his coat to the floor, not caring where it landed. Matt smiled, maybe it wasn't ever going to be perfect but maybe it was good enough.

Matt snapped out of the memory with a tear in his eye, Tai was gone, out of his life forever, just like Sora. Still he felt much worse about Tai than his most recent lover; all his dreams of a happy ending had vanished the day Tai had walked out of his life. Perhaps it was more than coincidence that he seemed to have lost all his courage that day, then all his friendships had slowly disintegrated, without Tai he hadn't felt the need to bother with other people. Then when he and Sora had begun their fated relationship he thought just for a little while that he had found his love. Of course it was not to be, he didn't want Sora, he didn't want anyone except for Tai, his beloved goggle boy.

As he fired up his ignition he was suddenly struck by a thought, maybe Tai was gone but there was still another goggle head, someone who mimicked Tai so much it struck at him sometimes, one of the few friends he had left. Yes he thought as he drove away. There's still a few miracles left.

~~~ Takaishi Apartment 09:40 ~~~

Davis woke up totally alone, although there was an impression in the bed where a body had been laying it was cold, as if it had been abandoned for quite a few hours. He was suddenly gripped by a sense of panic, last night he had spilled his soul to TK and more than that he had given himself, his very first time. Now he was here all alone, still covered in the sweat and all the rest of it from last night, and TK had abandoned him. It didn't seem fair, he was on the verge of tears when he spotted a note, hastily written in TK's semi-illegible scrawl on a piece of note paper placed on the pillow. Looking at it for a moment Davis' heart dropped, either TK was a hell of a lot smarter than he had been given credit for or he'd made a lucky guess, but somehow he knew. As he got dressed Davis kept seeing the words TK had written flashing across his mind, like some advertising slogan he couldn't get out of his head.

Dai-Chan

I know I can never be the one you want, I knew that last night before, well you know.

Just go tell Matt how you feel, I'm sure it'll all work out for you

TK

P.S. Thank you for last night.

Davis just hoped that TK and Matt were as close as everyone thought they were. He hoped that he wasn't about to make the second biggest mistake of his life.