The Difference
Chapter 12 - Choice Actions and Hard Decisions
(Sarah)
Fatigue is an awful thing, especially in a Weapon bout. The heaviness of the limbs, slowing down reaction time - a blow a first Level could avoid strikes the wrong place, leaving a pain that won't fade as fast as it should. Striking a blow that could take down a tenth level misses its mark and swipes only air. And when your opponent knows you are fatigued, well, then you are really in the recati. In short, I was "screwed", as Marco had put it once.
"Oh, this is a truly wonderous fight!" The flat side of her clehdenah connected with my cheek, even as I tried to duck and block, and knocked me down. My vision swam as I tried to push myself up, out of the creek bed. The cold water flowed over my fingers as surely as if I had always been a part of the stream - water, my worst enemy.
You will die by the hand of water…
Water. Ugh. My opposite Casting force, opposite of my kithien, but, unfortunately, my best hope for winning. I had no choice.
Seharai nende vi shalen… veracha! I needed shalen, water, because it was the only one readily available for almost immediate use. Haelen surrounded me and lethlen below me, but water was my only hope… I had not the strength to argue for the power of haelen, nor the time to wait for lethlen to pass its judegment. Shalen, my only hope…
"Down again, little morpher?" A hard kick cause a loud cracking in my side and immense pain ripped through my entire body. My arms caved and I fell face first into the creek. It was the abrupt cold over any of the head wounds I had sustained that shocked me out of my battle mindset. My body was beginning to lose feeling where it had hurt the most - the leg that had irritated me since the since before hurt less now and the numbness of blood less took over the gashes, cuts, and bruises that covered my body. I could hardly feel a thing!
Perfect.
"You… do not learn, do you?" The water warmed around me, seharai nende slowly awakening in their own powers. I felt some of my strength return, enough for me to push myself up on my hands. And now, this would end… "A Cross is not just a Weapon… I am also a Caster…" The seharai nende began to run together, forming dense bands in the water around my hands. Tighter, and tighter they gathered, drawn by my will… a Caster's will is capable of anything and their emotions influence their will. Anger is a cold, hard emotion…
"Your power is useless, even you will admit so." A strong hand grabbed my braid and yanked my head back with such force I thought my neck would snap - truly, Alay was capable of snapping a person's neck and the Yeerk knew this, but my sudden death would be the end of her fun. Instead, she pressed the cold edge of the clehdeanah against the exposed skin of my throat and chuckled darkly. "Give up, little girl, you cannot win."
"I was recently taught a saying, shena," I told her flatly. "I believe it was 'do not count your chickens before they hatch'." My hands were encased in ice, hard, unforgiving ice that was pliable only to me. To anyone else, it was as had as rock.
"And just what is that supposed to-" I reared up like a panicked haede, dragging a stream of frozen water with me. By some grace of my Naming Goddess, I managed to twist myself around, despite my pain wreaked side, and slam one of my palms into Alay's side. She screamed and staggared back, taking her sword with her. I felt a sharp sting as the tip clipped my throat, then my chin, but I had regained the upper advantage. And with half of my shalen bounty left, I would win surely.
"You have chosen a bad day to fight with me, worm," I told her gravely as I stood, drawing small amounts of strength from the shalen to keep me balanced. "Harming mi atala and attempting to kill Marco only made me angrier - you do not cross an angry Caster." She glared at me, one hand over the half frozen side of her middle and the other tightening and loosening on her sword. She knew losing her temper would mean losing the battle but she did not know the battle was long lost to her.
"You are going to pay for this, you… you… freak," she snapped. "I won't let you get away with injuring me! And you won't win!"
"It is too late for threats, Yeerk, is it already over." I raised the hand that the ice still covered and simply flung it at her. Free of me, the seharai nende began to release one another and it was a torrent of icy water when it slammed into Alay, causing her to drop her weapon.. I was right behind the deluge, tackling her to the ground with the last of a burst of adrenline. She struggled underneath me, but gravity and my weight were enough to hold her down, no strength needed.
"Get offa me, you useless human!!" Four Gods, I was exhausted. If the Yeerk had truly known how tired I was, it would have won, even with a half frozen human host. I was no match for a child, much less a Weapon who was a sublevel above me…
"I am not getting off until you are out of her head," I said sharply, using anger to mask the weariness in my voice. "If you do not leave, I will kill her with you. "Freedom at all costs"." She paused in her squirming and stared at my as if I had lost my mind.
"You… you wouldn't…" But she did not need me to tell her otherwise - Alay told her. Anger became fear and the Yeerk stared at me with wide eyed silence. "You… you're insane."
"I have my reasons," I answered. "Now, get the five hells out. Your time is over." Silence again. I knew it would not work but I could not wait three days for hunger to kill the Yeerk. Alay was capable of breaking our of every prison known to man or alien - nothing I was capable of doing would be able to hold her and there was very little chance the Animorphs could do anything either. It was now or I would be forced to kill my best friend.
Alay's body relaxed underneath me and her eyes drooped shut. I steeled myself for an attack - just because I was going to lose did not mean I was going to let it happen easily. But, to my utter and completely surprise, no attack came. Instead, something began to imerge from Alay's right ear, a thick, ugly brown thing that took its time leaving the head of mi itala. So captivated was I by the revolting sight I was not prepared when Alay's arm unexpectedly jerked out from under my knee, sending me toppling onto my injured side. Burning pain ripped through my body again, alighting every other injury it came in contact with. My vision blurred and all I could do was chew on my lip to keep from crying out - Weapons do not cry, Teslahni do not cry, and I do not cry. Not from physical pain.
Through blurred vision, I watched Alay sit up and hold the squirming shape of her once capture. The one prison she could never escape from - her own mind- was now no longer a prison. With a snarl and a twitch of her hand, she crushed the little beast in her fingers and wiped the remains on the dirt beside her. Finally, an ally I could truly trust…
Oh gods… I was not going to cry outloud, but I was hysterical inside. In all my life, almost nothing had ever hurt so much. One time - one time there had been pain much like I felt, but it was been worst, coupled by betrayal and confusion. I had cried then. Cried until I could no longer cry and from then, did not cry again over mere body wounds.
"Sarah!!" Alay was at my side what seemed like forever and a lifetime later. She knelt on the ground and gently coaxed my rebelling body into a sitting position. "You stupid, stupid shena. I can't believer you'd let yourself get this beat up!"
"Jaia, itala… you have no idea how much it hurts…" Thank the Four Gods, I had Alay back. Only Alay would see my physical injury as a reason to insult me. She was only being honest - I had been stupid. I had pushed myself too far and I would pay the price. But to have mi itala back… it was worth it.
"If you die, I swear on every god worshipable by man, I will leave your stupid corpse for the carrion eaters," she told me, even as she assessed the injuries she could readily see. "For crying outloud, itala! How much blood can you lose?!"
"It is not blood loss…" I grimaced as she touched a thin gash that ran across the top of my forearm. "Blood loss cannot kill a Teslahn, you know that, itala." She rolled her eyes and tore a strip off of her shirt to wrap it around my arm.
"Goddess forbid your kind be anything but stubborn and thick-skulled," she mused. "You are not allowed to die, understand?" I grinned weakly, feeling every ounce of the fatigue I had been pushing aside wash over me at once.
"I… I promised Matt and Laur to bring you home… hedashan na…you and Sadie and Emily… I cannot die, itala… ia hedashe…" I told her. It felt like I was thinking through a fog… I just wanted to sleep or… die… anything to be rid of the pain. But the Caster Healers had taught us to never sleep if we had sustained even one head-type injury… and I knew I had at least three, possibly more that the fog was keeping from my memory.
"Sarah!" Two more were there before I realized someone had called my name. Marco and… a boy I did not recognize. He looked familiar, like…
His eyes… His eyes reminded me of someone, someone I had had only met once. But I could not remember…
"Mei -did- di -do- -to- -her-?!" Alay's head snapped up at the anger in the new boy's and confusion settled into my mind. He knew my language? Was he from home too…? No, it was not possible for him to be from home… then he was…
"T… Tobi'as…" Tobias, mi atala, in his human form. I had never seen his form. If I had been fully in my mind, I would have realized why Rachel was jealous. He was very nice to look at. Not as nice as some people, but very nice nonetheless.
"Tobias?" Alay looked down at me, then back at Tobias. "I'm glad you're alive. Both of you, actually. We haven't a lot of time. Epsil planned for his own demise - if we don't move, and fast, we'll be surrounded by Hork-Bajir with no escape. There's at least forty around this clearing and more on the main forest paths."
"Wait a minute - you're free?" Alay cocked her head to the side and arched an eyebrow. "What?" asked Marco.
"What kind of stupid question is that?! Of course I'm free, you idiot!" Alay gave an exhasparated sigh and looked down at me. "You couldn't pick someone smart for a protégé?" I shook my head slowly and tried to think of an answer, but everything about me felt so heavy, even my brain. I just needed to sleep…
Go on… it is all right… sehar… I could feel my eyes closing and struggled to keep them open. I was not supposed to fall asleep! There were many sicknesses that came with falling asleep with head injuries and the last thing I needed was to get sick.
Sehar, deta, sehar…The voice sounded so gentle, like my father's…
"Sarah… Sarah!" Someone was calling me…
Sehar… Sehar, Sarah…
"Sarah…!"
