Author : Wild-Melody
Disclaimer : I don't own 'em, though sometimes I wish I did.
Class/Genre : Drama/Angst, maybe a little romance
Summary : In an elaborate ploy, the Yuuzhan Vong destroy the snub fighter supposedly belonging to the manifestation of Yun-Harla, the trickster goddess: Jaina Solo.
Song : I'll Be Missing You : By Puff Daddy
A/N : Hey, before you all start flaming me for killing Jaina, I want you to understand one thing: Things are not always what they seem. There will be more to this story than meets the eye. If you want me to complete it, just let me know.
STAR WARS : THE NEW JEDI ORDER
I'LL BE MISSING YOU
Chapter 1 : Death of a Goddess
Colonel Jagged Fel glanced out the cockpit canopy of his fighter craft and watched as Jaina Solo effectively roller her X-Wing out of the path of a coral skipper. The asteroid-like craft quickly turned in its trajectory, trying to find the elusive craft. She suddenly dropped out of nowhere, right in front of the coral skipper. The Vong pilot didn't have time to react as Jaina released a volley of short burst quad lasers. The skip's dovin basil swallowed the laser fire, but missed the torpedo. The skip blew up in a spectacular burst of yorik coral.
"You amaze me yet again Goddess," Jag heard Kyp's voice crackle over the comlink shared between their ships and Jaina's.
Jag gritted his teeth but said nothing, though he did have to admit it was a pretty good maneuver.
"Thank you Twins Two," he heard Jaina reply to Kyp's remark. "Heads up Twins Three, you got a skip coming up behind you fast and furious." He heard her direct toward him, a slight edge to her otherwise calm voice.
"Copy that Twins Lead," Jag responded and threw his claw craft into a gut wrenching tuck and roll. He straightened the fighter's nose out then spun it into a hard 180-degree turn.
"Right behind you Twins Three," he heard over the comlink just as he saw Jaina's X-Wing sweep down in front of him from out of nowhere. She quickly pelted the on coming coral skipper with her quad lasers. "You gonna jump in anytime here Twins Three or do I have to do it all myself?" she asked, slight amusement evident in her voice.
"Just waiting for your go ahead Lead," Jag responded.
"You've got the-"an electronic squeal suddenly was emitted over the com frequency.
"What the?!" both Jag and Kyp said at the same time.
"Cappie's been hit," Jaina's voice suddenly cried out, "Stabilizers are out, shields down to 64%. I'm in trouble here!"
"On our way Lead," Jag said and quickly jinked his ship into action.
Jaina's X-Wing was spiraling out of control, heading dangerously close to the planet below, Borleias. Suddenly another X-Wing entered the picture, a glowing red tail of fire trailing behind it.
Jaina's X-Wing wobbled and bounced around, attempting fruitlessly to get out of the other damaged fighter's flight path. To no avail, the two fighter craft collided and exploded in a bright fiery burst.
A coral skipper that had been dogging Jaina's crippled craft fired on last burst of plasma at the Trickster's ship, in hopes of hitting Jaina Solo's craft before the inevitable collision. The skip soared through the explosion, paused a moment as it rotated in its course, then disappeared in a burst of light.
"NO!!" Jag screamed as he watched the burning embers of the two X-Wings wink out in the vacuum of space. He didn't cry, he felt the tears well up in his eyes, but he refused to allow them to fall. 'Someone will pay for this,' he vowed and gritted his teeth in grim determination. He looked for the first Vong ship to enter his line of sight and took off after it.
"Twin Suns Leader, report please," he heard his Uncle Wedge's voice come over the squad's frequency. "Lt. Solo, report please."
Static crackled over the com frequency and Jag knew there would be no answer. Another innocent life claimed by the Vong. 'How many more will there be?' Jag wondered to himself.
"Twin Suns Leader, please respond!" Wedge's voice again, more urgent this time.
"Twins Leader was…destroyed," Jag said very quietly.
"Repeat that please Colonel Fel," Wedge said anxiously, hoping her had misheard his nephew. The Solo's just couldn't withstand loosing another of their children. Anakin's death had been bad enough, then the uncertainty of Jacen's fate. Now this, Jaina had to be all right, she just had to be.
"Twins Leader was destroyed," Jag repeated a bit louder this time.
"Did she eject?"
"Negative sir, no sign of the pilot's ejection seat," Jag answered, scanning his screens and sensors, hoping against hope to see the faintest of blips. Nothing. Absolutely nothing. "She's gone," Jag said softly.
"Copy Colonel Fel, " Wedge said sadly, dreading having to tell Han and Leia of Jaina's fate. "The Vong are now retreating, all squadrons return back to base. Rogues, you'll have sentry duty. Keep your eyes open and stay alert. Everyone else return to base." Wedge's voice was somber as he relayed the order.
Jag fell in with Kyp, but neither said a word. The ships flew side by side, each pilots' mind focused on the young woman who had just passed.
******
Kyp felt a ghostly hand touch his shoulder within the cramped cockpit of his X-Wing. He looked around and of course saw no one. May the Force protect you, he heard her voice say softly in his ear.
"Jaina?" he looked around the cockpit but saw nothing. Then the fleeting touch was gone, like a final farewell. "Farewell Jaina," Kyp whispered.
******
He felt a chill invade the cockpit of his claw craft and wondered if he had developed a hull breach during the battle. He checked out all of his systems and everything was in the green. No problems there.
The chill swelled, growing steadily colder until he could almost see his breath forming in front of him. Then it was gone, and the cockpit was its normal temperature.
He felt a warmth caress his cheek as a gentle touch was placed against his lips. You said you'd never leave me, but it turned out I'm the one that left you. I'm sorry Jag, a voice whispered against his lips.
"Jaina?" Jag questioned, hoping he was hearing things, yet at the same time hoping he wasn't.
I'm sorry Jag, the voice whispered again, sounding distanced now.
******
He glanced around at all those gathered for the assembly. The funeral service for Jaina Solo. There was not a single dry eye in the place, emotions were plain as day on everyone's faces. Everyone's except for his face, Jagged Fel's.
The last of the Solo's children was dead, the Vong had managed to wipe out an entire generation of a family. How many more families would perish before the end of this terrible war would be seen?
Jagged Fel glared up at the encroaching night sky as a squadron of X-Wings flew past, their S-foils locked in attack position.
There had been no body to retrieve, there wasn't much left of either of the two X-Wings that had collided. No proper burial, how hard that had to be on her family.
They'd been teammates, Jaina and he, and perhaps if the opportunity had arisen, so much more. He never know, not now…
A somber intro like a church organ began, then turned a little more up beat as it echoed across the interior PA systems…as Jag listened to the music and lyrics he could find nothing else that matched the occasion and what had happened as what the lyrics were saying. The lyrics put emotions into words and as he glanced around at those gathered around he couldn't help but notice that there were fresh tears standing on everyone's cheeks.
This right here (tell me why) goes out to everyone who has lost someone that they truly loved…
Seems like yesterday we use to rock the show
I laced the track, you locked the flow
So far from hanging onto profit for dough
Notorious they got to know (that)
Life ain't always what it seems to be
Words can't express what you mean to me
Even though you're gone we're still a team
Through your family I'll fulfill your dreams
In the future I can't wait to see
If you open up the gates for me
Reminisce sometimes
The night they took my friend
Try to black it out, but it plays again
When this real feeling is hard to conceal
Can't imagine all the pain I feel
Give anything to hear half your breath (half your breath)
I know you're still living your life after death
He could still picture her X-Wing spiraling out of control, heading dangerously close to the planet they were trying to defend. Then out of no where the other X-Wing vectoring in on her flight path, there was absolutely nothing he could've done, even if he could've gotten there in time…but to watch her die that way? Fresh tears surged to his eyes but still he refused to let them fall. Now was not the time for tears, there would be time later, once this war was over with.
If now is not the time then when? A silent voice asked from the back of his mind.
Later, he answered the voice. Once this war is over then I can grieve, now those emotions could cost me my life or that of someone else. I will grieve later…now is not the time.
The voice remained quiet, but Jag still felt uneasy. A single tear wound its way down his cheek, he made no move to wipe it away. Luke Skywalker, who was standing next to him, glanced over at him briefly. The older man put a comforting hand on the younger man's shoulder.
Every step I take
Every move I make
Every single day
Every time I pray
I'll be missing you
Thinking of the day
When you went away
What a life to take
What a bond to break
I'll be missing you
Luke glanced over at the young man that was standing to his right. His left hand held tightly onto that of his wife, Mara. She held their tiny son in her arms, tears streaming silently down her face. She made no sound, refused to.
Leia and Han stood on the further side of Mara. Tears coursed down Leia's face as she held tightly onto Han for support. Three children, they had lost three children. He couldn't imagine what they were going through, didn't want to imagine as his eyes returned to his infant son, Ben.
Luke's eyes turned up to the heavens above and watched as the squadron of X-Wings made yet another pass over the assembly. He turned to look at Jagged Fel once more and noticed the single tear that had made its way down his cheek, it had been there before, but now its trail sparkled a glossy silver.
Kind of hard with you not around
Know you're in heaven smiling down
Watching us while we pray for you
Everyday we pray for you
Till the day we meet again
In my heart is where I keep you friend
Memories give me the strength I need to proceed
The strength I need to believe
My thoughts they just can't be defined
Wish I could turn back the hands of time
Us in the six
Shopping for new cloths and kix,
You and me taking flix
Making hit stages they receive you on
Still can't believe you're gone
Give anything just to hear half your breath (half your breath)
I know your still living your life after death
Leia held onto Han tightly, the tears coursing down her cheeks. She couldn't stop them, even if she tried. Her heart was broken, she couldn't believe that Jaina was gone now too. First Anakin, now Jaina…Jacen's fate was still unknown, but she refused to believe that he was gone, no matter what anyone else would say. She just couldn't believe it. He was the last of their children, he had to live…everything depended on him now. The family legacy…everything.
Her bond with her daughter had been broken a long time ago, recently they had just started to put it back together. She had so many high hopes for her daughter, now the Vong had shattered those hopes. Just like they were shattering everything else.
She felt a soft touch against her cheek and looked up at Han, fully expecting to see him smiling down at her. Instead she saw him staring off into space, his hands nowhere near her face. She looked quickly around but saw no one really near to her besides Mara and Ben, but Mara was staring intently over at Luke.
I'm sorry mother, she felt that same whisper soft touch against her cheek.
Jaina? Leia called out with her mind. Luke and Mara looked over at her, picking up her unease. Mara's brow creased in concentration as her eyes flew around to take in the ceremony. Leia watched as her sister-in-law quickly passed in front of Luke, handing their infant son to Jagged Fel and left the ceremony. Her eyes met with Luke's but he just shrugged, not sure what his wife had detected.
Leia once again felt the feather light contact of her daughter. Jaina? Leia met Luke's gaze and understood at once he was feeling it too.
I'm sorry mother…the voice echoed in the distance then disappeared completely. A final farewell. A terrible gut-wrenching pain doubled Leia over as a new surge of tears glided their way down her cheeks. "NOOO!!!" she cried out in pain, the lost of her daughter too much.
Every step I take
Every move I make
Every single day
Every time I pray
I'll be missing you
Thinking of the day
When you went away
What a life to take
What a bond to break
I'll be missing you
Someone tell me why
Jagged Fel stared down into the grayish-blue eyes of the baby in his arms, he looked over at Luke Skywalker and curiously raised an eyebrow. The little boy cooed up at him, his pudgy arms reaching up to play with a part of Jag's formal military suit.
Skywalker just shook his head, not understanding himself what had urged his wife to leave the ceremony the way she had. Moments later Mara Skywalker returned, Luke looked at her curiously but she just shook her head. Nothing, she silently sent to him.
She took her son back from Jagged Fel and looked down into the eyes of her child and smiled sadly. One more cousin you'll never get to know Ben. I'm sorry things are turning out the way they are…life was never meant to be this way.
On that morning
When this life is over
I know I'll see your face
Every night I pray
Every step I take
Every move I make
Every single day…
She gently caressed his cheek as he fell into a restless sleep. I'll love you always Jag, she said silently as she kissed his cheek. He mumbled something in his sleep and rolled over to his side so that he was facing her.
I'm only sorry it ended this way…I had so many hopes and dreams for us. I guess now I'll never know, she paused as he rolled again, onto his back this time. She gently ran a finger across his cheek, he hand came up to grasp hers, but only went through it.
"Jaina," he murmured in his sleep. She bent down and kissed him once more on the lips before disappearing.
I love you Jag, echoed in the room long after her departure.
