Title: The One With The Flashforward
Chapter 9
I'm back!!! *insert evil laugh* He, he...*insert more evil laughing* Oh! *insert some not so evil coughing*
~~~~
Scene: Courtney's room. Formerly Rachel's room, Phoebe's room, the guest room...boy, they just can't keep a character in this room, can they? Anyway, Emma and Courtney are in Courtney's room.
Emma: So, what's going on today?
Courtney: Well, you know how I told you Joey and Phoebe are sleeping together?
Emma: Yeah?
Courtney: Well, first David proposed.
Emma: The scientist guy?
Courtney: Yeah.
Emma: You know, I've always hated him.
Courtney: Oh, me too! Anyway, Phoebe said no to him, and then Joey proposed and, like, your parents are still kinda mad at Joey about the whole pregnancy, proposing with Uncle Ross's ring thing.
Emma: I know, they were complaining about it last night.
Courtney: Really?
Emma: Yeah. They thought I was asleep, but they were talking really loudly.
Courtney: Our parents are weird.
Emma: Yeah, and their friends too. So what else?
Courtney: My mom's pretending she's pregnant.
Emma: So she's not?
Courtney: No. She wants to be, though.
Emma: O-kay. Your mom's really weird.
Courtney: (like Monica) I know!
~~~~
Scene: Monica and Chandler's. Monica and Phoebe are sitting at the kitchen table. Monica has a sweatshirt stuffed in her shirt. They are working on Phoebe's wedding. There's stuff all over the table and Phoebe looks really bored. Chandler and Joey are in the living room watching Emma and Courtney play with the chick and duck.
Phoebe: Hey, I wanna hold it in Central Perk.
Monica: I don't think they'll let you do that.
Phoebe: Well, then, what about Central Park? Oh, that's so cool!
Monica: What?
Phoebe: Central Park, Central Perk! (laughs like it's the funniest thing in the world and opens the door to leave, still laughing. She doesn't close the door and we see her run away. Rachel comes through the open door staring at Phoebe, but then she sees Monica and the wedding table.
Rachel: Oh, that makes sense. (walks over to the living room where the chick and the duck are apparently racing.)
Joey: Go! Go! Go, chick, go!!
Chandler: No! Go, duck, go!
Rachel: Wow, the girls found two-year-olds to play with.
Chandler jumps up.
Chandler: I'm just gonna be out there (points out the window) not petting the dog.
Rachel: Okay. Hey, Joey?
Joey: (still cheering on the chick) Yeah?
Rachel: Don't you have a wedding to plan, or something?
Monica: Did someone say "wedding"?
Joey: Oh, no!! (runs out the door. We hear him calling) Phoebe!! Phoebe!!! Wait up!!!!
~~~~
Scene: Monica and Chandler's. Later. Emma and Courtney are now petting the chick and duck. The duck has a huge medal around his neck. Rachel is sitting on the couch watching them. Monica is still at the kitchen table. Chandler comes inside from their balcony thing, leaving the window open.
Phoebe and Joey: (outside on the street) We're free! We're free!!!
Monica: Hey, I hear Phoebe and Joey! I'm gonna go catch up with them. We have a whole lot to do! (picks up the huge wedding book and runs out the door. Chandler walks over to the girls.)
Chandler: Hey! The duck won! Cool! (high fives Courtney, who's holding the duck. Then he turns around and sees Emma) Oh, too bad.
Rachel: Well, Emma, I would leave you here with your incredibly mature Uncle Chandler, but we need to get going.
Chandler: Oh, where are you going?
Rachel: We're going over to Carol and Susan's because they're having a party for Ben's 18th birthday.
Chandler: Oh, okay. Wait. Why weren't we invited?
Rachel: Oh, cause it's only family.
Chandler: We're family!
Rachel: Oh. (laughs) Oh, silly me! Did I say Ben's birthday? I meant Susan.
Chandler: Susan's turning eighteen?
Rachel: It's their eighteenth anniversary, I don't know.
Chandler: Okay, what's really going on?
Rachel: Monica's scaring me! We're going over to our apartment.
Chandler: Oh, okay. Hey, you know, if we can, can we sneak out later and hang out over there with you? Please? Pretty please?
Rachel: Sure, I guess so, but if you blow our cover...(shakes her finger at Chandler and Courtney.)
~~~~
Scene: A wedding dress boutique thingie. Two weeks later. Phoebe is trying on dresses. Rachel, Monica, Emma, Courtney, and, in yet another shocking and surprising twist, Alice, Chandler the girl, and Leslie are there too. You remember them, don't you? Gooooood.
Phoebe: (to a saleslady) Yeah, I like this one, but I think I want something, I don't know...even more expensive.
Saleslady: Alrighty. Any preferences?
Phoebe: Yeah. Expensive!
Saleslady: Okay. (rushes off)
Alice: Just wondering, Phoebe. It may not be any of my business, but how are you paying for this?
Phoebe: Oh, well, Joey's big and famous and has been in three movies. (holds up three fingers) That's three! Count 'em! Three!
Alice: That makes sense.
Leslie: Aunt Phoebe?
Phoebe: Yeeah?
Leslie: Are we invited to the wedding?
Phoebe: Of course!
Leslie: Are we in the wedding?
Phoebe: Um...(She gets uncomfortable, and you can tell they're not. Monica listens carefully, because if Phoebe says they are, all her plans will have to be changed.) Of course! You're my matching Junior bridesmaids!
Monica: (off near the bridesmaid dresses) Dammit!
Rachel: What? What is it, honey?
Monica: Oh, uh--(notices everyone is looking at her) These bridesmaid dresses are so darn expensive! (fake laughs)
Rachel: (obviously thinks she's crazy) Okay, Monica. Whatever.
Chandler: (the girl. "Chandler is a girl! Chandler is a girl!" hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!) Hey, Aunt Phoebe?
Phoebe: I'm so in demand today! Yeah?
Chandler: Since you're marrying someone rich and famous, will you buy me a car?
Alice and Leslie: Chandler!!
Chandler: Oh, sorry. (motioning to Leslie and herself) Will you buy us a car? (Leslie nods, satisfied)
Alice: Leslie!
Phoebe: Oh, no, Alice, it's okay. Maybe for their birthday. (to the girls) But if I get it for you, you have to share it with your brother.
Leslie and Chandler: Okay. (run off to look at dresses.
Alice: That was nice of you to include the girls in the wedding.
Phoebe: Yeah, I know!
Alice: What about Frank, Jr. Jr?
Phoebe: Uh...he can be the ring bearer!
Monica: Dammit!
Rachel: What the hell is wrong with you?
Monica: Nothing! (softly) I'll tell you later.
Phoebe: (loudly) Tell her what later?
Monica: It's nothing.
Phoebe: Okay. (to Alice) I bet they're planning a party!
Alice watches Leslie, Chandler, Emma, and Courtney gushing over dresses.
Alice: (to Phoebe) They should. You are the greatest sister-in-law and aunt anyone could ever have!
Phoebe: Aww, thank you! I know, though.
~~~~
Scene: Joey's. Joey, Ross, Chandler(the guy), Ben, Frank Jr, and Frank Jr. Jr. are there, just hanging out.
Joey: So, isn't it hard to believe that in two weeks it won't be single Joey any more? It'll be "Joey, Married Man." Hey, I could be a superhero!
Chandler: Yeah, I think you'll really like it, dude.
Ross: Yeah, once you got the ring and the girl straightened out--
Ben: Dad! Shut up about it! It was ten years ago, and you and Rachel are the only ones who care anymore!
Ross: Yeah, well, I CARE!!! Oh, you already said that, didn't you? (Ben nods.) I'm just gonna go watch TV over here. (walks over to the TV and sits down. Doesn't turn the TV on)
Joey: (to both Franks) So, guys. Are you okay with me marrying Phoebe?
Frank Jr: Yeah, I think you guys just go. Hey, you got any plastic spoons? (holds up his lighter.)
Joey: Yeah, over there on the floor. (points. To Frank Jr. Jr) How about you? What do you think?
Frank Jr. Jr: I don't know, I've never really met you. Hey, Dad, can I get in on some of that spoon action? (walks over to Frank Jr. Now it's just Joey and Chandler standing at the counter, cause Ben is over near Ross and they've finally turned on the TV)
Joey: Hey, now it's gonna be three couples hanging out together.
Chandler: Yeah, but it's not gonna be that different than the six single people hanging out together.
Joey: But, now, no one can say they just had the best first date. Or that they gotta break up with someone.
Chandler: Well, that's because that part of our lives is over. Now we can say we had a romantic night on our anniversary. Or that we're gonna have another kid.
Joey: Hey, is Monica--
Chandler: No, but she wants to be.
Joey: Wow, that's great, good for you!
Chandler: Yeah, I know.
Joey: Hey, is this what you were talking about?
Chandler: Yeah.
Joey: Cool.
They sit in silence for a minute.
Joey: Hey, wanna play some foos?
Chandler: Always! (they walk over to the table) And you know, about that superhero thing? If you just get a costume, we can go fight crime tomorrow, okay?
Joey: Sure, whatever.
Chandler: Just as long as I don't have to be Robin.
Joey: But you fit the part, man!
Chandler: (reluctantly) Yeah, I guess so.
Chapter 9
I'm back!!! *insert evil laugh* He, he...*insert more evil laughing* Oh! *insert some not so evil coughing*
~~~~
Scene: Courtney's room. Formerly Rachel's room, Phoebe's room, the guest room...boy, they just can't keep a character in this room, can they? Anyway, Emma and Courtney are in Courtney's room.
Emma: So, what's going on today?
Courtney: Well, you know how I told you Joey and Phoebe are sleeping together?
Emma: Yeah?
Courtney: Well, first David proposed.
Emma: The scientist guy?
Courtney: Yeah.
Emma: You know, I've always hated him.
Courtney: Oh, me too! Anyway, Phoebe said no to him, and then Joey proposed and, like, your parents are still kinda mad at Joey about the whole pregnancy, proposing with Uncle Ross's ring thing.
Emma: I know, they were complaining about it last night.
Courtney: Really?
Emma: Yeah. They thought I was asleep, but they were talking really loudly.
Courtney: Our parents are weird.
Emma: Yeah, and their friends too. So what else?
Courtney: My mom's pretending she's pregnant.
Emma: So she's not?
Courtney: No. She wants to be, though.
Emma: O-kay. Your mom's really weird.
Courtney: (like Monica) I know!
~~~~
Scene: Monica and Chandler's. Monica and Phoebe are sitting at the kitchen table. Monica has a sweatshirt stuffed in her shirt. They are working on Phoebe's wedding. There's stuff all over the table and Phoebe looks really bored. Chandler and Joey are in the living room watching Emma and Courtney play with the chick and duck.
Phoebe: Hey, I wanna hold it in Central Perk.
Monica: I don't think they'll let you do that.
Phoebe: Well, then, what about Central Park? Oh, that's so cool!
Monica: What?
Phoebe: Central Park, Central Perk! (laughs like it's the funniest thing in the world and opens the door to leave, still laughing. She doesn't close the door and we see her run away. Rachel comes through the open door staring at Phoebe, but then she sees Monica and the wedding table.
Rachel: Oh, that makes sense. (walks over to the living room where the chick and the duck are apparently racing.)
Joey: Go! Go! Go, chick, go!!
Chandler: No! Go, duck, go!
Rachel: Wow, the girls found two-year-olds to play with.
Chandler jumps up.
Chandler: I'm just gonna be out there (points out the window) not petting the dog.
Rachel: Okay. Hey, Joey?
Joey: (still cheering on the chick) Yeah?
Rachel: Don't you have a wedding to plan, or something?
Monica: Did someone say "wedding"?
Joey: Oh, no!! (runs out the door. We hear him calling) Phoebe!! Phoebe!!! Wait up!!!!
~~~~
Scene: Monica and Chandler's. Later. Emma and Courtney are now petting the chick and duck. The duck has a huge medal around his neck. Rachel is sitting on the couch watching them. Monica is still at the kitchen table. Chandler comes inside from their balcony thing, leaving the window open.
Phoebe and Joey: (outside on the street) We're free! We're free!!!
Monica: Hey, I hear Phoebe and Joey! I'm gonna go catch up with them. We have a whole lot to do! (picks up the huge wedding book and runs out the door. Chandler walks over to the girls.)
Chandler: Hey! The duck won! Cool! (high fives Courtney, who's holding the duck. Then he turns around and sees Emma) Oh, too bad.
Rachel: Well, Emma, I would leave you here with your incredibly mature Uncle Chandler, but we need to get going.
Chandler: Oh, where are you going?
Rachel: We're going over to Carol and Susan's because they're having a party for Ben's 18th birthday.
Chandler: Oh, okay. Wait. Why weren't we invited?
Rachel: Oh, cause it's only family.
Chandler: We're family!
Rachel: Oh. (laughs) Oh, silly me! Did I say Ben's birthday? I meant Susan.
Chandler: Susan's turning eighteen?
Rachel: It's their eighteenth anniversary, I don't know.
Chandler: Okay, what's really going on?
Rachel: Monica's scaring me! We're going over to our apartment.
Chandler: Oh, okay. Hey, you know, if we can, can we sneak out later and hang out over there with you? Please? Pretty please?
Rachel: Sure, I guess so, but if you blow our cover...(shakes her finger at Chandler and Courtney.)
~~~~
Scene: A wedding dress boutique thingie. Two weeks later. Phoebe is trying on dresses. Rachel, Monica, Emma, Courtney, and, in yet another shocking and surprising twist, Alice, Chandler the girl, and Leslie are there too. You remember them, don't you? Gooooood.
Phoebe: (to a saleslady) Yeah, I like this one, but I think I want something, I don't know...even more expensive.
Saleslady: Alrighty. Any preferences?
Phoebe: Yeah. Expensive!
Saleslady: Okay. (rushes off)
Alice: Just wondering, Phoebe. It may not be any of my business, but how are you paying for this?
Phoebe: Oh, well, Joey's big and famous and has been in three movies. (holds up three fingers) That's three! Count 'em! Three!
Alice: That makes sense.
Leslie: Aunt Phoebe?
Phoebe: Yeeah?
Leslie: Are we invited to the wedding?
Phoebe: Of course!
Leslie: Are we in the wedding?
Phoebe: Um...(She gets uncomfortable, and you can tell they're not. Monica listens carefully, because if Phoebe says they are, all her plans will have to be changed.) Of course! You're my matching Junior bridesmaids!
Monica: (off near the bridesmaid dresses) Dammit!
Rachel: What? What is it, honey?
Monica: Oh, uh--(notices everyone is looking at her) These bridesmaid dresses are so darn expensive! (fake laughs)
Rachel: (obviously thinks she's crazy) Okay, Monica. Whatever.
Chandler: (the girl. "Chandler is a girl! Chandler is a girl!" hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!) Hey, Aunt Phoebe?
Phoebe: I'm so in demand today! Yeah?
Chandler: Since you're marrying someone rich and famous, will you buy me a car?
Alice and Leslie: Chandler!!
Chandler: Oh, sorry. (motioning to Leslie and herself) Will you buy us a car? (Leslie nods, satisfied)
Alice: Leslie!
Phoebe: Oh, no, Alice, it's okay. Maybe for their birthday. (to the girls) But if I get it for you, you have to share it with your brother.
Leslie and Chandler: Okay. (run off to look at dresses.
Alice: That was nice of you to include the girls in the wedding.
Phoebe: Yeah, I know!
Alice: What about Frank, Jr. Jr?
Phoebe: Uh...he can be the ring bearer!
Monica: Dammit!
Rachel: What the hell is wrong with you?
Monica: Nothing! (softly) I'll tell you later.
Phoebe: (loudly) Tell her what later?
Monica: It's nothing.
Phoebe: Okay. (to Alice) I bet they're planning a party!
Alice watches Leslie, Chandler, Emma, and Courtney gushing over dresses.
Alice: (to Phoebe) They should. You are the greatest sister-in-law and aunt anyone could ever have!
Phoebe: Aww, thank you! I know, though.
~~~~
Scene: Joey's. Joey, Ross, Chandler(the guy), Ben, Frank Jr, and Frank Jr. Jr. are there, just hanging out.
Joey: So, isn't it hard to believe that in two weeks it won't be single Joey any more? It'll be "Joey, Married Man." Hey, I could be a superhero!
Chandler: Yeah, I think you'll really like it, dude.
Ross: Yeah, once you got the ring and the girl straightened out--
Ben: Dad! Shut up about it! It was ten years ago, and you and Rachel are the only ones who care anymore!
Ross: Yeah, well, I CARE!!! Oh, you already said that, didn't you? (Ben nods.) I'm just gonna go watch TV over here. (walks over to the TV and sits down. Doesn't turn the TV on)
Joey: (to both Franks) So, guys. Are you okay with me marrying Phoebe?
Frank Jr: Yeah, I think you guys just go. Hey, you got any plastic spoons? (holds up his lighter.)
Joey: Yeah, over there on the floor. (points. To Frank Jr. Jr) How about you? What do you think?
Frank Jr. Jr: I don't know, I've never really met you. Hey, Dad, can I get in on some of that spoon action? (walks over to Frank Jr. Now it's just Joey and Chandler standing at the counter, cause Ben is over near Ross and they've finally turned on the TV)
Joey: Hey, now it's gonna be three couples hanging out together.
Chandler: Yeah, but it's not gonna be that different than the six single people hanging out together.
Joey: But, now, no one can say they just had the best first date. Or that they gotta break up with someone.
Chandler: Well, that's because that part of our lives is over. Now we can say we had a romantic night on our anniversary. Or that we're gonna have another kid.
Joey: Hey, is Monica--
Chandler: No, but she wants to be.
Joey: Wow, that's great, good for you!
Chandler: Yeah, I know.
Joey: Hey, is this what you were talking about?
Chandler: Yeah.
Joey: Cool.
They sit in silence for a minute.
Joey: Hey, wanna play some foos?
Chandler: Always! (they walk over to the table) And you know, about that superhero thing? If you just get a costume, we can go fight crime tomorrow, okay?
Joey: Sure, whatever.
Chandler: Just as long as I don't have to be Robin.
Joey: But you fit the part, man!
Chandler: (reluctantly) Yeah, I guess so.
