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Chapter Five: A Dip Into Sirius' Illegal Supply of Alcohol
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the wee hours of wednesday morning
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James had been flying when the thought came to him that he wasn't in the least bit angry with Sirius anymore. Maybe he'd been a little too hasty in assuming that Sirius and Remus' newfound…closeness…had been revenge against him.
He'd admonished himself for being so self-centered and for causing another petty grudge to come between himself and his best friend, and left Quidditch practice in a good mood.
And, being in a good mood, James was, naturally, hungry.
So, after stashing his Quidditch gear in the changing room and taking a quick shower, the bespectacled boy headed back up to the castle, ready for another kitchen raid.
His original plan was to ask Sirius, as a way of extending the white olive branch of friendship (or whatever the hell that phrase was), but since he could not find Sirius or Remus or Peter (which was unusual, because he usually had to be extra careful as to not step on the poor boy), he decided to make his little excursion a solo one.
So we join our intrepid hero as he silently moves down a back staircase, armed with the Invisibility Cloak and some extra fireworks…
James rounded the corner, then dodged as quietly as possible into an alcove as he heard a noise coming from up ahead. He froze as it came again, and then with a sort of jolt he realized that he was hearing someone crying.
He moved softly across the corridor and peered invisibly around a doorframe into an abandoned classroom, where the last person he thought it would be was sitting on a desk, swinging his feet, and sniffling as tears overflowed his eyes.
"Moony?" James said in disbelief, pulling the hood back from his face. Remus gave a start, eyes wide at the sight of James' head floating in midair.
"P-Prongs! What are you d-doing?" Remus scrubbed at his eyes, trying to sniffle inconspicuously.
"I should ask you that, you know," James said, pulling the cloak off entirely.
Remus looked down. "I'd rather not talk about it, if that's alright with you."
James shrugged and sat down on the desk beside Remus. After a loaded pause, he started talking: "Can you believe how badly the Wimbledon Wasps lost that last match against Puddlemere United? It was shameful! 450 to 20, really! They should be ashamed to call themselves a Quidditch team! I mean…"
"Padfoot told me he loves me." Remus was looking at him pleadingly, grey eyes huge and shining with tears.
James opened his mouth, but nothing came out. He tried again. The third time was the charm. "But…but shouldn't you be happy?" He fiddled with the hem of his sleeve. "I would be…" he said softly. Remus didn't hear.
"He doesn't mean it, of course he doesn't. You know how many girls he's told the same thing – I would have to be an idiot to fall for that."
"Do you love him?"
Remus looked away, hands twisting themselves in his robes. All was silent for a few uneasy moments, and Remus slid to the floor, weighed down by that silence.
"Yes."
James sat down on the floor beside Remus, who was scrunched into a ball, arms around his knees, face buried in his robes. The black-haired boy hesitated for a moment, then pulled Remus to him, tucking the young werewolf's chin under his and placing his arms loosely around the other boy's waist. Remus tensed for a moment, then relaxed into the embrace as James dropped a chaste kiss on his temple.
"We love you, Moony, Padfoot and I do. I'm sure Wormtail does as well – I just haven't heard his thoughts on the subject." Remus gave a weak snort in reply. "Anyway, when we found out about you being a…werewolf and all we swore to each other that we wouldn't ever do anything to hurt you, ever, because you've had enough hurt in your life already…"
"I-I…you don't need to…"
"Shh, let me finish." James placed one finger over Remus' lips. "I don't think Padfoot would lie to you about something that serious…Serious, ha. Anyway…he wouldn't, I don't think. I've known him my entire life, you know. He might lie to some girl about something like that, but never to our best friend and especially not to someone he's sworn on his manhood to protect."
Remus gave a watery smile and settled farther down into James' arms.
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Peter and Sirius nearly ran into each other as they rounded the corridor leading to Gryffindor Tower from different ends.
"Sorry, Wormtail old boy, didn't see you there," said Sirius distractedly. "Say, have you seen Moony?"
"Have you seen Prongs?" They had spoken at the same time, and suddenly something clicked and they both smiled knowingly.
"Prongs, huh?" Peter nodded.
"You and Moony…?" Sirius nodded.
"I think we both need to get rip-roaringly drunk. What do you say?" Sirius put an arm around Peter's shoulders and guided him towards the portrait hole.
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The door clicked shut, and James was left alone.
He pulled his knees to his chest, feeling dreadfully lonely. Of course Sirius was in love with Remus. Remus was the epitome of courageous; he was beautiful and graceful and had the prettiest grey eyes in the wizarding world; he had a mind like an encyclopedia and a heart that wanted so badly to trust. He was so tragic and unassuming and perfect.
Sirius would have to be completely without any senses at all to not fall for Remus.
James set his glasses down on the floor beside him and pressed the heels of his hands to his eyes. All he could do now was go and threaten Sirius with dismemberment and a haircut if he ever hurt Remus, and ponder over which friend he was really jealous of.
Sirius. Remus. Hell, he was jealous of them both. Both so precious, both so desirable.
James let his head fall back and rest on the desk behind him. For the first time in his life, he felt left out.
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"Wormtail old buddy," Sirius slurred, waving a bottle of cognac above his head, "I have to tell you," he hiccuped, "about the love of my life." He took another swig. "He…is…exquisite…" he sighed, laying back on the hardwood floor. "You wouldn't…think it but he's so…vi…vi…vibrant, you know, and e-energetic, if you give him enough chocolate anyway, and oh can he kiss…I can't believe…I didn't realize b-before how in love with him I am…" He turned over onto his stomach, letting the empty bottle roll under the bed. "It m-must of happened the f-first time I met him, at the…train first year, because I r-remember thinking how much I wanted to touch his hair, since it was so soft and came down past his shoulders and he wears it in that adorable little pony-tail…" Sirius giggled. "Shit, I-I'm really, really drunk…" He giggled again, and couldn't stop.
"Okay…okay, it's m-my turn, now…" Peter blinked repeatedly, trying to get his eyes to focus.
"Ho…ld…on… I h-have another bottle somewhere in my…my…" Sirius gestured at his trunk. "This big brown wooden thing I put my clothes in…ooh, trunk, that's the ticket…" He rummaged around near the bottom and finally came up with a rather sizable bottle of scotch. "Oookay…go ahead…" He unstoppered the bottle and took a swig before passing it to Peter.
Sirius whistled in appreciation as Peter took a very long draught out of the bottle before setting it down with a clunk and collapsing backwards. "My turn," he gasped out.
"Y-yeah, go ahead," Sirius drawled.
"Prongs…Prongs…P-Pr…ongs…is…" he slurred, gesturing with one hand at the ceiling before he passed out with a snore.
Sirius raised himself on his hands and knees and peered at Peter, then took another long swig. The alcohol burned on its way down his throat, but Sirius didn't mind in the least. He attempted to stand, but swayed and stumbled insanely, finally collapsing back onto the floor as the room pitched and spun around him. The last thing that his mind registered before it went temporarily out of commission was that it was entirely too hot in the dormitory. Someone ought to have opened a window.
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early wednesday morning
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"Oh, great. Just great." Remus returned to the dormitory to find two of his best friends (and coincidentally the only two people he'd ever kissed) passed out on the floor.
As he was Mobilicorpus-ing Peter into his bed, he realized: A.) It was nearly 4:00 in the morning; B.) He had missed half of school the day before; C.) He had done absolutely none of his homework that night; and D.) They had to be at breakfast in less than three hours.
"What happened? Are they dead?" James said wryly, hands on his hips.
"No, but close. Looks like they dipped into Sirius' illegal supply of alcohol." Remus, with a flick of his wand, banished the half-empty bottle of scotch across the room. James caught it and was about to take a swig when Remus stopped him. "Don't, Prongs. We're going to have to think of some reason these two are going to skip classes tomorrow…er, this morning. I'm not too keen on sitting through History of Magic on three hours sleep, either."
James took a swig anyway. "Let me have my temporary distraction. I've had a spectacularly horrible day."
Remus tucked Sirius under the covers and grabbed the bottle from James. "Give me that." He took a very, very long draught. "Mmh. Relief in diluted ethanol." He took another very, very long draught. "Prongs, my dear friend, you are not the only one who's had a 'spectacularly horrible' day."
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wednesday afternoon
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Professor McGonagall rapped smartly on the door of the sixth-year boys' dorm. Its four occupants had missed several morning classes, and it they weren't planning some sort of prank then she would eat her hat and turn herself into a sloth.
"Boys? Are you in there? Open this door at once!" There were some muffled groans and creaks in response. "If someone doesn't open this door in the next ten seconds there will be points taken from Gryffindor."
10…9…8…7…6…5…4…
James slowly cracked open the door, holding his head. "Yes, Professor?" he said hoarsely.
"Where have you all been? You have missed three classes so far today, and may I add that Mr. Lupin missed all his afternoon classes yesterday? If it comes to my attention that some sort of prank is in the works, I will give you all detention every night for the next week."
They both winced as someone began to throw up in the background. "I'm sorry, Professor, but we're all sick. Remus must have caught something yesterday and given it to all of us." James looked positively green in the face. He took a deep breath, quite unsteady on his feet. "I'm sorry, but I really need to go lay down again, Professor, I'm really sorry…" He closed the door and stumbled back to bed.
Remus, who had drunk the least out of all of them, but was still left with a pounding headache, was sitting at the edge of Sirius' bed, stroking the other boy's hair.
"Please…wanna hold you…" Sirius mumbled plaintively, reaching out to Remus with his eyes closed against the evil, evil light.
Remus slid as smoothly as he could under the covers, careful not to jostle the bed around too much. All he needed was for Sirius to throw up again.
"Here I am."
"Mmm." Sirius buried his face in Remus' shirt, breathing in deeply. Then to the young werewolf's surprise and dismay, he realized that the shuddering breaths Sirius was taking weren't just shuddering breaths, but an attempt to suppress sobs. Remus, anticipating a crisis, closed, locked, and silenced the curtains with a few key waves of his wand. "Moony…you're so…you're so good to me, and I screw it all up…"
"Hush. You haven't screwed anything up."
"Oh yes I have. You're just pretending I haven't because I have this horrible hangover and feel terrible…" his voice wavered and broke, "…or maybe you don't think I have because you think it's somehow your fault, which it isn't, and I should have…I should have just kept my horrendously enormous mouth shut…I would have if I knew you would run away…" He sniffled.
Remus felt a bit uncomfortable. He'd never seen Sirius in such a vulnerable position, and it made him feel terribly uneasy and out-of-place. He rubbed small circles on Sirius' back, making hushing noises. "Shh, shh. You'll give yourself even more of a headache."
"I'm so, so sorry…"
"You've nothing to be sorry for."
"I made you cry."
"Well, I just made you cry, so we're even."
"No, I made me cry. You, never. You're too good of a person to ever make anyone cry."
"That's not true."
"Yes it is." Sirius pushed at Remus' chest with his nose.
"I love you."
"No you don't, you're just saying that to make me feel better."
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Remus let Madame Pomfrey into the dormitory about an hour later. She poked James a few times, nodded and made "I thought so" noises, and supplied them all with steaming mugs of greenish-brown liquid with a wave of her wand.
"I shouldn't think that I would need to remind you boys that consuming alcohol on a school night is usually a bad idea."
"Alcohol? What alcohol?" Sirius said weakly from his bed.
"Mmhmm. You are not allowed to miss afternoon classes, but if you feel you must, you may join me in detention both this Thursday and Friday night at 9:00 PM."
James piped up. "Detention sounds good to me, ma'am."
There were noises of assent all around the room.
Madame Pomfrey gave a wry smile. "I look forward to it. Professor McGonagall also reminded me to inform you that if any of your schoolwork, both for today and for tomorrow, has not been completed and handed in, she will take a hundred points from Gryffindor – each."
"Yes, ma'am."
There was an tangible feeling of relief throughout the room as the round little witch shut the door behind her.
"I thought we were in much more trouble than that."
"Me too."
"Have you tried this stuff? It's fabulous…my head's finally stopped trying to explode." Sirius drained his mug. "I'm going for a shower."
"Me too." Remus pulled some clean clothes out of his trunk just after setting his empty mug down on his bedside table.
"James?" Peter said, as their other two dorm-mates shut the door behind them.
"Yes?"
"I…I…" I like you? I love you? I've had a crush on you for so long now? I need to hold you in my arms or I'll die? I want you so bad?
James drained his mug, collapsing back on the cushions.
"How are things with Lily?" Shit. Shit. Shit. I hate myself.
"Great! She asked me if I wanted to meet her at the Three Broomsticks on Friday…at…7:00…damn it! Damn it, damn it, damn it!" James smacked himself on the forehead.
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"Why aren't you going to classes? I would have thought that you would, since you're the one who's so neurotic about missing possible exam material."
"It's just DADA, Transfiguration, and double Herbology. I can catch up fairly easily." Remus smiled coyly.
"I've been a terrible, terrible influence on you, haven't I?" Sirius said, tossing his shirt onto the counter beside the bathroom sink.
"Oh, you horrible young man! Sirius Black, you've corrupted me beyond imagination!" Remus said, in an uncanny impression of Professor McGonagall, letting his shirt drop in a pile beside Sirius'. He leaned mock-tragically against the wall, one hand on his forehead, licking his lips and letting the other hand trail to the fly of his pants.
"Have I now?" Sirius advanced predatorily.
Up in the dormitory, if anyone happened to be paying attention, they'd notice that yet again only one shower was turned on – and that one shower stayed on for the next hour and a half.
Missing classes didn't seem to be overrated at all.
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(swish and flick)
Finitum Chapter Five!
To be continued…
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