Sometimes I can still see her walking down the halls, her hair following her ever so gingerly, her heels clicking meekly against the floor. Her presence was one that could not be ignored no matter how hard one tried, and I had tried time and time again. Exasperating, persistant, downright stubborn...
And sometimes I can still feel her cold body held against me as I grasp at her, trying to put the life I'd taken away back inside of her.
Suddenly that presence--demanding, attentive, so /there/--was so small, so tiny. I could have crushed it if I wanted to, and I had to crush it although I didn't...
She was never so beautiful as she was then, with the blood pouring down her thin frame and tattered dress, remnants of her earthly presence. Something is whispering at me; I can feel it begin to take control even as I deny its presence. Madness does not ask to be let in, for he opens the door and enters himself; I leave my body and mind to him, because surely he knows better than I do.
I raise her head and she looks at me with dull, lifeless eyes, glazed with death, and for a moment I'm not sorry. But then the feeling goes away and the realization of what I had done sinks in.
Roll, my Roll--who would have believed you would ever die? Yours was a being that should have lived forever, could have lived forever if I had not interfered.
My face and claws are splattered in her blood, and more covers them as I run one claw down her broken face to her broken body. We would have been joined together in life, but now we can be joined together in death. At least there, no one can hurt you.
What a pleasant dream!
And sometimes I can still feel her cold body held against me as I grasp at her, trying to put the life I'd taken away back inside of her.
Suddenly that presence--demanding, attentive, so /there/--was so small, so tiny. I could have crushed it if I wanted to, and I had to crush it although I didn't...
She was never so beautiful as she was then, with the blood pouring down her thin frame and tattered dress, remnants of her earthly presence. Something is whispering at me; I can feel it begin to take control even as I deny its presence. Madness does not ask to be let in, for he opens the door and enters himself; I leave my body and mind to him, because surely he knows better than I do.
I raise her head and she looks at me with dull, lifeless eyes, glazed with death, and for a moment I'm not sorry. But then the feeling goes away and the realization of what I had done sinks in.
Roll, my Roll--who would have believed you would ever die? Yours was a being that should have lived forever, could have lived forever if I had not interfered.
My face and claws are splattered in her blood, and more covers them as I run one claw down her broken face to her broken body. We would have been joined together in life, but now we can be joined together in death. At least there, no one can hurt you.
What a pleasant dream!
