Chapter 14: Awakenings
======================
For a single, heartstopping second, Ayeka thought she was too late. The small figure, just below her and to her right, was so still and frozen as to defy any chance of being alive. The whimpering Aykea had heard must just have been the wind.
Then Sasami coughed. It was little more than a sick sounding splutter, but it forced Sasami's head to twist feebly.
Ayeka/Washu stared at Ryoko/Sasami. This is what she had been desperate for since leaving the house, what? Four hours ago? Five? Yet all of a sudden she was terrified to do anything, lest the spell be broken and the body of her sister vanish into the ether.
Was Ayeka just imagining the child?
Or had she arrived only in time to watch her sister's body crumble into the water?
Trying to be as quiet as possible, Ayeka began to slowly crawl through the mud towards the bank, ignoring the insistant, throbbing pain of her right ankle. The last thing she wanted to do was startle Ryoko into falling, but if Ayeka could at least get a grip on Sasami's body...
Ayeka found herself glancing back and forth between Sasami and a gnarled, old tree just to Ayeka's left. Part of the roots hung out over the creek, just above Sasami. If Ayeka could work her way along the overhang to where she was directly above the child, she could maybe grab ahold of Ryoko and haul her up. The pirate would be surprised, but Ayeka doubted she would have the strength to struggle much, even if she wanted to.
It was then Sasami's head lifted to regard her with pink, solemn eyes.
Ayeka kept her face straight, but her mind was suddenly filled by a single word in large, bold letters.
Oh SHIT....
* * *
Up above the forest canopy, a dark, sleek, spidery object drifted. The scant moonlight glinted metallically off Ryo-Ohki's hull as the cabbit/spaceship hung serenly over the treetops.
Washu had been adamantly against Ryo-Ohki using her spaceship form in the search for Ryoko. It wasn't exactly the most subtle of tactics to employ, and given the pirate's fragile state of mind the scientist had feared it would drive Ryoko away from the searchers and have her run helter-skelter off a cliff or into a river.
But Washu wasn't here anymore. And as far as Tenchi was concerned they were out of options.
Tenchi/Mihoshe studied the sensors with a mixture of intensity and detachment as Ryo-Ohki quartered and requartered the search grid. Although the storm had departed, it had left a lot of atmospheric distortion in its wake, and even the cabbit's sophisticated array of sensors were having trouble making sense out of it all. The cold, brooding tree canopy added to the white noise, smothering the thermal imaging systems and making them virtually useless.
'A police chopper would proably have a better chance of finding them,' Tenchi brooded aloud. He ran a nervous tongue over his teeth, touching gently against Mihoshe's fangs. It was so easy to forget that she was, in fact, an alien...
'The heat signature of a single child IS rather difficult to locate, even under the best of conditions,' Kamadake replied. The Guardian was still outside, acting as a signal booster for Ryo-Ohki's scans. 'And these have proven far from ideal.'
'So I guess we keep scanning, right Ryo-Ohki?' Tenchi/Mihoshe's asked in a resigned tone of voice.
'Miyaaa...' came the cabbit's equally mournful reply.
* * *
'Ryoko.'
Ayeka was surprised at how hard it was to form the word; her lips were cracked and her mouth was so dry. She vaguely realised she had spoken very little in the past few hours. All of a sudden she desperately wanted a drink of cool, fresh water.
Or tea; or sake; or brandy; or whisky. Anything that would wash the rancid taste of clay and muddy rainwater from her mouth.
Ayeka tried again: 'Ryoko. Stay there; I'll be with you in a moment.' Ayeka raised her body and prepared to reach down.
Ryoko jerked so violently that for a terrifying instant Ayeka thought Sasami's body would fall backwards into the water, with those pink, solemn eyes following Ayeka all the way down; riveting the princess in silent, bitter accusation.
'Stay away!'
Ryoko/Sasami's voice was a thin, dry shrill. Any further response was choked off by a bout of violent, high pitched coughing.
Ayeka froze solid. Part of her was desperate to just lunge down there and grab this idiotic pirate-in-a-princess; the other part was fearful even to breathe.
Carefully, Ayeka/Washu backed away so that only her head was visible to Ryoko from below. 'Ryoko, you can't stay there,' Ayeka tried and failed to keep the exasperation from her voice, squeezing her eyes shut as a fresh wave of nausea washed over her. For a split second she fancied she could see Kiyone's face hovering anxiously in front of her...
Not NOW dammit!!
Had Ayeka said that - or had it been Washu?
The moment passed. Ayeka reopened her eyes; Ryoko was before her again.
The Jurian resumed crawling towards the overhanging tree-root, all the time never taking her eyes off Ryoko/Sasami. 'You can't stay there,' Ayeka repeated firmly. 'You'll get yourself killed.'
Ayeka had to work hard to keep any bitternes or accusation out of her voice, lest it send Ryoko over the edge. In all truth, despite being shocked at the pirate's appearance, Ayeka knew that she herself looked little better. Any bitterness in her voice would have been aimed more at herself - but Ryoko would never believe that.
Ayeka's vision began sparking again; she could see images of Washu's lab, flashing by in rapid succession. They created a strobing, moving image that tied her brain up in knots. It was like superimposing two movies on top of each other and trying to watch both at the same time. Only the voice came through loud and true: STALL!!
Ayeka's hand brushed against the tree root. The princess scrabbled backwards, trying to climb over it without taking her eyes off Ryoko/Sasami.
'Why do you care if I live or die?' the child demanded, almost petulantly.
'I DO care, Ryoko,' Ayeka replied, realising she was speaking to the pirate in exactly the same manner she would berate an erring child. 'There's no-one else here; that makes you MY responsibility. And I'll be DAMNED if I let anything else happen to you. You're my BABY.'
Had she just SAID that??
OR was that Washu again...?
Ayeka risked a quick glance at the root. It was rugged, with deep clefts in the bark providing excellent grip for Washu's small hands. But it was covered in moss - fed by water dripping down from above - and the torrential rain had made its surface slimey and slippery.
'You wont get across that way,' Ryoko replied, her voice almost darkly satisfied. 'It's too slippery. I tried, an' I fell. I couldn't help it; I'm sorry.' Ayeka stared in wonder as Sasami's small body was wracked by a powerful sob. Dark lines creased around the child's eyes as they squeezed tightly shut; Sasami's face twisted into a mask of anguish, and her head leant softly back against the bank as she quivered in grief.
'I'm sorry... I'm sorry, I'm so sorry... Ayeka; Sasami... please forgive me... Mommy...'
* * *
'I'm sorry... I'm so so very sorry...' Kiyone choked back the sobs as she struggled to focus her eyes on the circuit board she held in her hands.
She jerked slightly as she felt the cool muzzle of an injector-spray against her neck.
'Easy, Sasami,' Washu replied in Ayeka's silky smooth voice. 'This will help you concentrate.'
The artificial adrenaline was like a blast of hot air through Sasami/Kiyone's brain; the clouds in front of her eyes vanished before she could blink.
'Better?' Ayeka asked.
Sasami/Kiyone looked at her - sister? - and nodded. 'Yes.'
Washu nodded. The kick she'd given herself was already wearing off, but she didn't want to risk another shot just yet. 'Let's get back to work.'
* * *
At the door to Washu's lab, a shaken Mihoshe helped an equally shaken Kiyone to her feet. 'How are you feeling?' she asked.
Kiyone/Tenchi shook her/his head. 'Rough,' she replied. 'I should at least have been drinking to feel this bad.'
'And don't I know about THAT,' Ryoko grumbled as she scratched her own head.
Kiyone looked at Mihoshe hard.
'Oops,' Mihoshe giggled prettily.
* * *
Tenchi unclenched Mihoshe's fists. He'd forgotten how much longer her fingernails were than his own; he stared darkly at the small marks of blood in the palms of her hands.
'Dammit,' he whispered.
* * *
A dark anger began to well up inside Ayeka at the utter stupidity of their situation.
Why is it always us? she demanded bitterly of herself. How much MORE will my family have to suffer?? Why should there have to be so much misery and pain?
Ayeka looked back at the root, her eyes smouldering with a sudden, flaming determination. She tore Washu's shirt from her body, ripping it roughly down the fastenings. It had been reduced to little more than a sodden rag, and Ayeka was in no mood to be bashful.
Pulling her arms free of the torn sleeves, Ayeka flung the shirt broadly over the tree-root. She then climbed up herself, and reached down underneath to the hanging sleeves. It was tricky job tying them together without being able to see what she was doing, but Ayeka soon had the shirt wrapped securely around the tree.
That should give me some more grip, Ayeka told herself as she began squirming forward. She was careful to lock her legs together underneath as she stretched her hands out in front of her to grip the cracked, greasy bark through the shirt.
The cold air bit into Ayeka's exposed skin, breaking her out in goosebumps. Ayeka ignored it though; it was time for this madness to end, and it was up to her to end it, anyway she could.
Casting anxious glances at Ryoko/Sasami, Ayeka moved out over the flooded creek.
Ryoko had somehow sensed the change. As Ayeka watched the child, the pirate turned her head towards the Jurian and opened her eyes. They suddenly became sharp and aware as she focussed in on Ayeka/Washu.
'Stay AWAY! I KNOW you!'
'Ryoko!'
'You'll hit me again.'
'No! I swear! Let me help you!'
'No! I don't believe you! I've been bad.'
The simplicity of those three words struck Ayeka. The words of an apolegetic child who feared further punishment.
Not just fear. She was terrified.
Ayeka's face flushed with hot shame as her own anger turned on itself. She'd been wrong; she knew that. She wanted to fix things, make them right again. But Ryoko had to let her...
COULD things ever be the same again?
As Ayeka watched, Ryoko's eyes again squeezed shut; fresh tears flowed around cracked, red skin. 'I've been bad,' she repeated.
A fresh wave of nausea washed over Ayeka, and she suddenly found herself fighting to stay awake. If she lost control here, it would very likely cost both Ayeka and Ryoko their lives.
Be calm! a voice inside her head seemed to say. It is you yourself you must concentrate on. Only you can save Ryoko. You and me.
Ayeka/Washu opened her eyes. 'No. Ayeka was wrong. She is sorry, Ryoko; so very sorry. She wants to say sorry to you.'
Ryoko looked distraught and confused. 'But... I've been a bad girl. Sasami will hate me...'
'Sasami loves you!'
'I don't want them to see me like this!!'
'Then they wont! Please Sasami - Ryoko. The others miss you; they want you to come home now.'
Ryoko frowned; she seemed to consider that word carefully. 'Home...?'
'Yes, darling; home. Come back to us, where you belong.'
'I dun belong anywhere. I'm only a demon...'
'Don't SAY such things! You are bright and strong and loyal, Ryoko. You're loving and caring. We want you to come home to us Ryoko. You belong with us.'
'What about Ayeka?'
'Ayeka is VERY sorry about what happened. She's been crying about it and says how much she misses you.'
Ryoko looked hard at Washu. All of a sudden Sasami's face became a mask of hissing anger. 'You're LYING! YOU'RE Ayeka!'
'No I'm not, Ryoko! It's me - Washu!'
'That's just Washu's body - you have Ayeka's personality!'
'No! It's changing back naturally! But it's very dangerous for that to happen - I need to get us all back to the house and into the machine! Come back to the house and I can fix it. I can make it all better for you, Ryoko, but you MUST trust me!'
'Why should I? You were mean to me!'
'I'm not Aeyka for crying out loud! It's me, Washu!'
'I don't believe you!'
'Your mother would NEVER leave you all alone in the dark!'
'You have before!' Ryoko shivered as she fought back the cold and her own grief; it was hard to tell which has hitting her harder.
'You left me alone in the dark and the cold. I cried and cried and cried, but you never came. You just taped it and used it to blackmail me against Tenchi so you could run tests. No-one wants me around, 'cept when they want something. And when they've got it, they shoo me away or lock me up. EVERYONE leaves me alone!
'I've spent my whole life alone - even here. All I ever wanted was to be loved and feel safe here - anywhere. But people always say I gotta be a certain way or do a certain thing... why can't I just be ME?? What is so wrong with ME?? Why can't I just be ME....?'
Ryoko ran out of words and buried her face into the bank, crying and shivering. Ayeka - Washu? stared at her, her own thoughts echoing her daughter's. Why can't I just be me...?
She was surprised at the insight of the words. They could've applied to ANYONE in the Masaki household. That somehow made them fitting. In a gentle voice, Washu replied: 'Nothing is wrong with you, dearest Ryoko. Ayeka realises that now; she feels the same way. Please come see her; she is so upset and sorry for what she did.'
'Ayeka's an idiot! She doesn't know what she's talking about!'
Ayeka snarled in fury at Ryoko's purile self-pity. 'What does it take to get through to you?? Ryoko, you KNOW you were always intended to be more than what Kagato made you. Kagato made you what you WERE - not what you ARE.'
Ayeka stopped short, amazed at the revelation she had just spoken, aware it had only become apparent the moment she said it.
And yet it was all true.
Every word of it.
She sighed. Washu spoke again softly: 'It doesn't matter what you were. All that matters is what you ARE - and what you WILL BE. We can't change our pasts; only our futures. That's why we're all here - to make a future for ourselves.
'You're your own person now, Ryoko; YOU decide what you want to be. You're the product of yourself, my dearest daughter, and those who love you: your family.
'We ALL love you, Ryoko, and we ALL miss you. Even Ayeka.' Washu's eyes began filling with tears; she desperately wanted to cradle her baby in her arms and tell her everything was going to be alright; she desperately wanted to warm her cold, cold child. She spoke with growing grief and desperation.
'Please darling; it's time to come home now.'
Ryoko looked up at her mother. Tears streaked Sasami's grimey face. Blue hair, plastered with grey mud hung limply. Round pink eyes gazed with desperate longing.
Weakly, slowly, Sasami released the muddy thicket she had been clinging to. With curious grace, Ryoko stretched her arm upwards towards Washu. The dirty hand, scratched and bleeding, opened wide as the child strained upwards.
'Mommy. Help me.' Ryoko's voice was a pleading whisper. 'Please...'
