Disclaimer: Don't own 'em. It's all in my head.
A/N: For any other info on this story, refer to the prologue.
Chapter 1
Three years later.
It was blinding, the light. After so long in the dark with only the soft light of the incense, the sunlight burned his eyes. He hadn't spoken since he had arrived here. The spell on his voice had been removed sometime after his capture but he had never uttered a word.
"There's someone in here!"
Hands. Always hands were touching him. Lips, mouth, tongue, words. He trembled but held still. He learned early on that to resist only made it worse. He had submitted, letting whatever or whoever touch him at will. To use his body without a care for his pleasure. He was here to serve and only that. He was a whore and nothing more. He had no name and no identity. He deserved none.
"Oh god, Harry!? Harry, is that you?! Harry, please answer me! It's Sirius! Harry!"
He felt hands shaking him. Who was Harry?
"Black, what on…"
He felt familiarity tingle down his spine. He knew this voice. This voice warmed him. Made him feel safe. Why?
Lifting his head, he tilted his head slightly, letting the black locks of hair part to allow him to see who the man with the Voice was. The moment he saw the tall man in black a rush of shame and self-loathing went through him. So strong that he wrenched away from the hands on his shoulders to bury his face away from the man. His voice, hoarse from disuse wrenched its way out of his throat to fill the air in pained shrieks.
Don't look! Don't see! Don't look at ME! DON'T! PLEASE, NOT YOU. ANYONE BUT YOU!
"Harry! Harry it's Draco! Look at me! Look at me! It's alright! Harry their gone! Their gone!"
Draco didn't know what to do. Here was Harry who had disappeared three years ago but not the same one.
/What happened to you? What did Voldemort DO to you?/
As he tried to get the screaming man to calm down, Draco's training kicked in and as he looked around the room his heart sank. He knew exactly what had happened to him. The proof was on the walls, shelves even the floor.
/They've broken you completely. Shattered into millions of pieces./
And yet, somewhere deep inside his friend remained the spark, which had been love for Severus Snape. Draco wasn't blind. He had seen how Harry had reacted to Severus voice and then seen him recoil in shame. Somewhere, deep inside that shattered psyche was the same insecure and loving Harry.
"We will bring you back." Draco whispered fiercely as he rocked the now whimpering man.
"You WILL heal."
~*~
Severus stood outside the room as he listened to Draco soothe his husband. The older man had seen the room. He was too good at details not to realize what had happened to his husband in his three years of captivity.
/My Harry. I'm sorry. So sorry I could not get to you sooner./
Not that it made a difference, he thought bitterly. After they had finally managed to kill Voldermort, the Death Eaters had been quickly taken into custody or killed when resisting. Everyone had been eager to leave this place and return to their families with the good news of the death of the Evil Overlord. It had been pure luck that Black had remembered there was a hidden room in this corridor. It had never occurred to them that Harry might have even been a captive. They had given him up for dead six months after his kidnapping.
/I'm such a fool. I gave up so easily./
Too easily, he now realized. Close to its heels came the horrific realization that it could only have been one man who had manipulated his mind so.
/He never truly approved of our relationship. He was the first to tell me to give up on Harry. To move on./
Severus had never discovered the reason for Dumbledore's disapproval of their relationship. Only that the disapproval stemmed towards Harry instead of himself as he had expected. The old wizard had said nothing but those close to them like Remus and Sirius could sense the hidden hostility. It had reached the point where Harry would not see Albus without someone else present.
When Harry had disappeared, Dumbledore had been appropriately worried but in the end he had been the first to suggest that Harry might have been taken from them permanently.
/"I'm sorry Severus, but it has been six months. There have been no demands from Voldemort nor any sign of Harry. I think it's time for you to think about the possibility that Harry might no longer be among the living."/
And like a fool, he had. He had thought about it, talked to Albus and in the end the man's subtle magic had worked its power over him. He had devoted all his time to his son and Harry had slipped to back of his mind, almost forgotten even.
/Everytime Draco would try to talk to me about him but I would divert the subject. I haven't even told Silas about Harry, the one who gave birth to him./
"Severus?"
HaHHHHH
He jerked out of his thoughts to come face to face with a worried Remus.
"Lupin," he rasped out, voice choked with emotions.
"I heard…"
"Yes. It is Harry. He's been here all this time. Voldemort and the others have kept him here alive."
Remus' eyes darkened with shock and guilt.
"Alive… Is he… How is he?"
Broken, thought Severus bitterly. Insane, abused, degraded to the point of not caring.
"He… is not well. They weren't idle with him."
A heavy silence enveloped them. They stood there, still as statues until soft stumbling steps alerted them to the approach of someone from the room. Draco emerged carrying the green eyed man who was wearing nothing but a sheet and a collar with a broken chain.
"He's asleep," said Draco softly. "I couldn't get the chain off. It's been spelled. We'll need a locksmith or the key."
The air was charged with suppressed magic and the two older men realized it was Draco. The blonde was noticeably upset and it was affecting his powers. His grey eyes were molten silver at the moment, telling everyone he was on the verge of losing control.
"Draco, let me carry him."
There was an ache in Severus voice which gave away his longing to touch his mate again but Draco stepped away from him, arms tightening around the sleeping figure.
"Draco…?" Remus glanced questioningly at the younger man, puzzled about his actions. Severus was too shocked to do anything but stare.
"I don't think it's a good idea."
Severus barely restrained his flinch even as Remus exclaimed in shock.
"Draco, what are you saying?! Severus is his mate!"
Cold, slate eyes just stared back at them, tempered only by a wealth of sadness and sorrow.
"I spent three years trying to convince him Harry was alive. Each time I was turned away, ignored. There are things in Harry's past Snape, that you knew nothing about. Actions, which you should have noticed, and tried to get him to explain. Instead, you placed all your faith into Dumbledore. You let him blind you and lead you down a less painful path. YOU LEFT HIM!"
By now Draco had backed away ten steps and was rigid with anger. His whole body was tense and the air crackled audibly with his magic.
"I thought you would be the last to give up. You seemed to love him so much. Yet, you were the first to turn away. You pushed everything of your time together into a neat little box and left it to rot. I've noticed Snape, when you talk to Silas, you mention nothing of Harry. Haven't you looked around your chambers? Everything indicates a solitary person with a child. There is no indication that Harry ever had a place in your life."
Severus staggered back as if the words were a physical blow. It was true, he realized in growing horror. He had let all his memories, all his determination and trust in his husband be washed away under Dumbledore's influence and his own desperate attempts to escape the harsh reality that Harry might have suffered a fate far worse than death.
/But that's not how it worked out, did it Severus?/ sneered a voice in his mind. /You wanted to believe so badly that he was gone, free from torture that you left him to suffer needlessly for three years. You essentially, killed Harry./
"I… I didn't…" Severus stuttered, trying to find the right words but there were none. Remus was supporting him in concern as he watched the dark haired man turn so pale he was almost translucent. He didn't see Draco's expression change to one of guilt and regret. The young man addressed his old Potions Master again.
"There were things I should have told you. Harry told it to me in confidence but still I should have told you. I regret not doing that now. Maybe, maybe it would have made a difference." Straightening his shoulders, Draco continued firmly, "Even so, it is too late for speculation. What happened, happened. But I will tell you certain things I should have in the first place, Snape. If you are ever going to get Harry to look at you without him killing himself in self-loathing, you are going to have to know."
Severus could do nothing but nod weakly at the blonde who turned his back to them and walked away swiftly with his precious bundle.
"Severus, don't be so hard on yourself. Draco was speaking in anger and guilt. Severus are you listening?"
He heard the words but it didn't register. Nothing did except the sight of his husband chained to the bed naked, surrounded by sex toys of every kind and torture items. In his mind, all he saw were the scars on that pale flesh made by them and the submissive, broken look in those glassy green orbs. Gone was the fire and joy of life which made them glow, all that remained was a dull green devoid of life or will.
/My fault. All my fault./
"Harry…" he choked out. And uncaring of the man beside him, Severus Snape began to weep.
~*~
He woke up in an unfamiliar room. Looking around him he saw several other beds which were unoccupied and a table beside each one and one more at the foot of the beds.
Where was he? Those strange people who had come into his world and dragged him to the surface were gone. But that pale man, the one with hair like the Other, had held him gently and he had felt safe. Only the Other had ever done that.
It was strange, he mused, that this man resembled the Other so much. Maybe they were related? But he had never seen this one before. Only the Other.
"You're awake."
His head whipped to his right and he saw the pale man again. Smiling shyly, he lowered his eyes to the bed and nodded. Would this one be gentle with him as well?
A gentle hand touched his chin, nudging him to lift his head. His wide green eyes, filled with shock met soft, worried grey.
"Do you know where you are?"
He shook his head. Memories beyond the dark were hazy and filled with pain and uncertainty. He always shied away from them. Now, they were almost non-existent.
"What about a name? What's your name?"
Again, he shook his head. He couldn't remember and no one had seen fit to give him one.
"Why don't you speak?"
Silence this time. Draco bit his lip in frustration and anxiety. Pomfrey had done a thorough check up on Harry and discovered nothing a little rest and care couldn't fix. But mentally, Draco knew he had a long way to go. Right now though, he would settle for hearing Harry speak.
"Alright, I won't force you to speak but you should know your name at least. It's Harry Snape, formerly Harry Potter."
Snape? That name made him feel strange. Something like happiness and self-derision warred within him. Why? It was just a name. Why affect him so?
"Harry, my name is Draco Malfoy. Do you remember me at all?"
Malfoy… Wasn't that the Other's name? Then this one must be related.
Draco watched in surprise as Harry's wary expression melted away to be replaced by a warm, welcoming smile. His heart jumped at the thought that maybe his friend did remember him after all. That thought was promptly destroyed as Harry's lips, soft and pliant met his own. The other man pressed himself enticingly against the blonde, eliciting a soft moan from the unprepared blonde.
The sound of his voice brought Draco to his senses and he quickly pushed Harry away, taking a step back for safety.
/What was that? Why would he react this way?/
"Why?" was all he managed to ask the silent man before him. He never expected a reply.
"You are like Him… gentle…" Harry's voice was soft and whispery from disuse. Vocal cords which had been dormant for three years began to wake up.
Draco went cold. Surely Harry couldn't have mixed him up with Severus?
"Who is Him, Harry?"
Harry leaned forward and gently touched the long blonde locks reverently.
"…like Him… even the hair… color… all the same…"
/Oh my god./
His father. Somehow, in his captivity, Draco's father had managed to get Harry into a position where the young man adored him. And from what had just happened earlier, willing to give his body over to him.
"Oh Harry…"
Looking at the uncomprehending face before him, he reached out to gently stroke a pale cheek as he struggled not to cry.
/When we finally do get your memory back, you're going to hate yourself so much. So much more than you did before. Will we lose you this time? Really lose you? By your own hand?/
"Harry, you need to rest some more. I'll be back in a while. Until then you stay here, understand?"
An obedient nod was returned.
Without looking back, Draco walked out of the infirmary to meet with one Severus Snape.
~*~
He found the Potions Master brooding in front of the fire in his living room. The dungeons were as chilly as ever and even in the middle of summer the underground rooms needed help to remain heated at a tolerable temperature.
"Severus."
The Potions Master jerked around to see Draco standing by his desk, an unfamiliar Pensieve beside him.
The blonde was troubled. Very much so. Something about Harry had caused this. He could see it from the way the grey eyes restlessly studied the room, avoiding his gaze. He only could not discern if it was anything recent or because of the secrets he had kept for Harry which he was now going to reveal.
Draco straightened his shoulders and picked up the Pensieve, making his way over to Severus and seating himself opposite him. Placing the bowl on the table between them, he stared at it for a moment, coming to terms with himself for what he was about to do before abruptly meeting the older man's gaze.
"What you are about to see Severus, are Harry's memories. Memories from before Hogwarts until when he finally came to reside here permanently. What you see here, you must swear on your life and magic to never tell a soul. If anyone ever found out, I fear that we would have recovered Harry only to lose him again should he know. As it is, I shouldn't even be letting you see this."
"Why are you telling me now? Oaths such as yours are not broken lightly." Severus kept his voice level and neutral but inside he was churning with anger and hurt. Why had Harry confided in Draco? Why not him? Wasn't Severus his mate?
"Because Harry loves you. He did then and does now but it's destroying him like a cancer. He cannot fight his demons alone and while he should have seeked out your help, once you see, you will understand why he came to me instead. Now Severus, do you swear?"
Severus knew that Draco would leave and never speak of this again should he balk now. The young Malfoy had already lost faith in him but was allowing him a chance. A way to make it up to Harry. If he could.
"I do so swear, on my life and my magic to never tell a soul through any medium of communication whatsoever, the knowledge which will be revealed to me tonight in this room."
Draco nodded, satisfied. "Alright the Severus, take my hand. I'll guide you to the memories you need to see."
Severus took the pale hand and a moment later the world dissolved around them.
~*~
~ Screaming.
He could hear someone screaming.
/A child./ His mind told him. The voice was young.
Then the surroundings coalesced together in terrifying panorama.
/Oh dear lord…/
On the bed, face down screaming in agony was a child no older than four. Atop him was a hulking man who was thrusting himself into the young body beneath him with abandon. He was obviously delighting in the screams the boy was emitting and Severus felt bile rise in his throat as the boy's eyes opened to reveal verdant, pain filled emerald orbs.
/No…/
"This was the first he could remember clearly. There were others before but they are blurred in his mind. All one entity. All one face. His uncle."
Draco's face was pinched and sorrowful. This was the second time in all his life that he ever witnessed the past of his friend.
"His uncle raped him?"
"Yes, and sold him. Harry is attractive as you know and as a child his helplessness drew the more sadistic kinds of people to him. Pale skin, dark hair and brilliant green eyes. His uncle made quite a lot of money. It continued in the house until he turned seven."
The scene blurred and another memory formed around them.
"Please sir, I have no where to go. Please help me."
Pleading eyes looked up at the man, the frail hand clinging to the longcoat. The man looked down in surprise before a more sinister emotion passed across his face.
"Have you no home, child? No family?"
Young Harry shook his head. "No sir. I'm an orphan."
Severus was horrified. "What is he doing?!" Why was Harry soliciting men on the street at age seven? What was he doing on the streets at all?
"The neighbours grew suspicious or nosy I suppose. Not even Harry knows why but his uncle began to force him to sell himself on the streets otherwise he would be whipped and starved."
Severus was in shock. He watched numb, as his eyes saw the young child allow himself be used and abused by all manner of people. Sometimes one at a time, sometimes in groups.
"Harry said he would guess that almost twenty would use him a night."
Severus couldn't breathe. Certain things fell into place. How Harry would never let Severus take him unless he could somehow see his lover. Why he always kept two candles burning while they slept. The way he was so adamant that their bedroom remain off limits to anyone, even the house elves. The locks he had had installed the moment he moved in and the multitude of spells he put on it every night without fail.
"There's more. This was the basis for his low self-esteem and self-worth. The next memory shows you how he fell into loathing himself."
Again the images shifted.
A large man gently stroked young 9 year old Harry's cheek, who was kneeling on the floor before him. The child purred and nuzzled his uncle's hand before bending down to kiss his feet.
"Good boy. Now look at me, boy."
Harry looked up meeting his uncle's lust filled gaze.
"What are you boy? Why are you on your knees?"
There was no hesitation when he answered. His voice did not even quaver, so well-trained was he.
"I'm a whore, master. I'm on my knees because I am not worthy to stand like a person."
"And why are you not worthy? What makes you a whore?"
"Because I do bad things. I let people touch me in my private places. I'm a whore because I do it willingly."
"And do you like being a whore? Being used for nothing but sex?"
"Yes, master. I like it very much."
Draco tightened his grip on the Potion Master's arm as the older man tried to hex Harry's Muggle
uncle who had begun to molest his nephew.
"There's nothing we can do! This is past and gone! Besides, the muggle is dead!"
Severus growled deep in his throat. He knew Draco was right, but watching as his mate was conditioned from childhood to believe he was nothing more than a sex toy caused rational thought to disappear from his mind.
"How dare he! How dare he make Harry think he was doing it willingly!"
"Alright, that's it. I'm taking you out. You're starting to froth at the mouth."~
~*~
Again their surroundings melted into nothingness, but this time when it reformed, it was the walls of the dungeons which greeted them.
The moment Severus got his bearings he collapsed. All the anger transmuting itself into a wave of
grief.
"Why didn't he tell me? Why didn't I see it?"
Draco gave the older man an unreadable stare.
"Because he's had years to practice hiding it. And in the end he doesn't really think he's hiding anything at all. He believes himself to be of little to no value. Striving to prove himself to everyone, to live up to their expectations, never uttering a word against them. In a sense, while you always saw him as a rule breaker he was actually obeying the unspoken, unwritten instructions laid before him."
Then Severus heard Draco's voice turn heavy with emotion.
"And then there was the issue of his heritage to contend with. Were you aware that Harry had fae blood? Nymph blood to be exact."
Severus went cold. It suddenly made sense. How everyone was inexplicably attracted to Harry. Why his uncle who abhorred anything magical would cross his own boundaries and touch his nephew in the foulest way.
"No…"
There was a legend among wizard kind. A folk tale among muggles about the nymphs and those with their blood. The blood of nymphs did not dilute as generations went on. They remained in the genes as powerful as a full blooded nymph. Because of this, many would be attracted to them but many knew better than to give in. Muggles rarely ran across them and even then they were reluctant to allow their minds to perceive their desire which had no logic for someone they never knew or wasn't even of the right gender.
The magical communities left the nymphs to their own devices, much like they did the High Elves and the nymphs did the same. A joining of nymph with any other race was rare but not unheard of. However, some of the less upright wizards did try to capture the nymphs. Usually all they needed was one. The legend stated that should a person have intercourse with a nymph, he or she would excel in whatever they did. However it would only be once each time. Thus, for a painter, one time to bed a nymph would give him one breathtaking painting. Should he want another he would have to bed the nymph again. It was one of the main reasons nymphs rarely let themselves be seen and those with their blood never ever mentioned it lest they be captured and raped by others.
That Harry had nymph blood explained his uncle's overwhelming lust. It also became doubly damning when he realized that Petunia as Lily's sister would have known about the legend and probably told her husband.
"Yes. And you are right. His uncle knew. That was one of the major reasons he would rape Harry as well."
Severus swallowed convulsively and as the rage ran through his veins, he wished that that scum who had hurt his mate was still alive so he could kill him himself. Draco avoided Severus gaze. Both of them were too emotional and unguarded at the moment. Finally, it was Severus who spoke first. His voice was soft, a sibilant note of menace lacing it as he tried to keep himself in check.
"Is there more?"
Draco nodded, closing his eyes only to open them again quickly. His mind's eye still seeing the image of his friend broken and battered.
"It's basically the same. Up until after the Tournament. In our fourth year, something changed. He had become withdrawn and troubled. I saw it but I don't know what happened to change him. It was at the beginning of fifth year when I approached him for help. A little over 5 months, we had come to trust each other and began to tell me little things, small fears. Later, we divulged other secrets. It wasn't until end of the year after my third mission did I find out Harry wasn't just suffering from simple lack of confidence. I tried to help the best I could, and then he fell in love with you."
Severus looked up from where he had been staring to meet blank grey eyes.
"It was the best and worst thing that ever happened to him."
It hurt. That statement, made with no malice and no anger. Just stating a fact. It hurt. It must have shown for Draco's eyes dropped and he rubbed his eyes tiredly.
"When he fell in love with you, it made determined to get over whatever was bothering him. It helped him out of his deperession. But at the same time, it made him insecure. All the teachings, all the words he had been told growing up began to resurface. He became insecure of himself. He never doubted his magic, but even when he was pregnant he lived in constant fear that you would leave him. That you would find someone 'better', someone 'clean' as he puts it."
"I would n…" /Never, Severus? But you did leave him. You abandoned him at the most crucial moment. You broke your vow and without a second thought either./
Wrenching his thoughts away, he found Draco looking at him with an expression which mirrored his inner thoughts. Pursing his kips for a moment, the blonde did not say anything but continued speaking. Here, Severus could see the tension returning to his shoulders. Why?
"Harry was afraid that once people found out about him, they would turn on you. Claim that you took advantage of him and used him for your own pleasure. He didn't want that to happen. He was terrified of ruining what would be a chance for you to have a happier life. And yet, he loves you so much that he couldn't bear to leave. The very thought of leaving your side would make him hysterical."
Severus kept quiet as Draco fell silent. He could see the blonde was trying to prepare himself for whatever it was he was going to tell Severus next. More than likely, it would be worst than anything else he had heard so far but he would listen. Too many secrets, all bringing trouble. He only hoped they weren't revealed too late.
~*~
A soft hand, weathered by age and experience caressed his face. He opened his eyes and met another distant pair. Familiar. They eyes were so familiar. This face, he could remember vaguely having seen this face before. It made him feel repulsed yet warm at the same time. Like he should obey and yet not.
But a slave never disobeyed. A pet was always obedient. And a tool must be used.
Rising from the bed, he silently crawled onto the man's lap and sank down on the exposed erection. He let out a silent moan as he felt the man enter him. It burned without and preparation but he was used to it and it did not deter him. Knowing what the man wanted, he bowed his head in submission as he began to move around the man.
Hands grabbed his hips as the man began to thrust up to him in rhythm. They continued like this for a few minutes before the man let out a soft his and he felt the man spill his seed within him. Getting up, he knelt before the man and licked him clean. The man was smiling and reached down to pat his head softly. Well done, it meant. The man waved his wand and he felt a strange sensation within him and realized that the semen in him had been cleaned. He ducked his head in thanks and stayed on his knees until the man left, robes swishing around him.
The and only then, did he climb back into bed, falling asleep quickly. It would seem that this place wasn't very different from his other home at all.
A/N: For any other info on this story, refer to the prologue.
Chapter 1
Three years later.
It was blinding, the light. After so long in the dark with only the soft light of the incense, the sunlight burned his eyes. He hadn't spoken since he had arrived here. The spell on his voice had been removed sometime after his capture but he had never uttered a word.
"There's someone in here!"
Hands. Always hands were touching him. Lips, mouth, tongue, words. He trembled but held still. He learned early on that to resist only made it worse. He had submitted, letting whatever or whoever touch him at will. To use his body without a care for his pleasure. He was here to serve and only that. He was a whore and nothing more. He had no name and no identity. He deserved none.
"Oh god, Harry!? Harry, is that you?! Harry, please answer me! It's Sirius! Harry!"
He felt hands shaking him. Who was Harry?
"Black, what on…"
He felt familiarity tingle down his spine. He knew this voice. This voice warmed him. Made him feel safe. Why?
Lifting his head, he tilted his head slightly, letting the black locks of hair part to allow him to see who the man with the Voice was. The moment he saw the tall man in black a rush of shame and self-loathing went through him. So strong that he wrenched away from the hands on his shoulders to bury his face away from the man. His voice, hoarse from disuse wrenched its way out of his throat to fill the air in pained shrieks.
Don't look! Don't see! Don't look at ME! DON'T! PLEASE, NOT YOU. ANYONE BUT YOU!
"Harry! Harry it's Draco! Look at me! Look at me! It's alright! Harry their gone! Their gone!"
Draco didn't know what to do. Here was Harry who had disappeared three years ago but not the same one.
/What happened to you? What did Voldemort DO to you?/
As he tried to get the screaming man to calm down, Draco's training kicked in and as he looked around the room his heart sank. He knew exactly what had happened to him. The proof was on the walls, shelves even the floor.
/They've broken you completely. Shattered into millions of pieces./
And yet, somewhere deep inside his friend remained the spark, which had been love for Severus Snape. Draco wasn't blind. He had seen how Harry had reacted to Severus voice and then seen him recoil in shame. Somewhere, deep inside that shattered psyche was the same insecure and loving Harry.
"We will bring you back." Draco whispered fiercely as he rocked the now whimpering man.
"You WILL heal."
~*~
Severus stood outside the room as he listened to Draco soothe his husband. The older man had seen the room. He was too good at details not to realize what had happened to his husband in his three years of captivity.
/My Harry. I'm sorry. So sorry I could not get to you sooner./
Not that it made a difference, he thought bitterly. After they had finally managed to kill Voldermort, the Death Eaters had been quickly taken into custody or killed when resisting. Everyone had been eager to leave this place and return to their families with the good news of the death of the Evil Overlord. It had been pure luck that Black had remembered there was a hidden room in this corridor. It had never occurred to them that Harry might have even been a captive. They had given him up for dead six months after his kidnapping.
/I'm such a fool. I gave up so easily./
Too easily, he now realized. Close to its heels came the horrific realization that it could only have been one man who had manipulated his mind so.
/He never truly approved of our relationship. He was the first to tell me to give up on Harry. To move on./
Severus had never discovered the reason for Dumbledore's disapproval of their relationship. Only that the disapproval stemmed towards Harry instead of himself as he had expected. The old wizard had said nothing but those close to them like Remus and Sirius could sense the hidden hostility. It had reached the point where Harry would not see Albus without someone else present.
When Harry had disappeared, Dumbledore had been appropriately worried but in the end he had been the first to suggest that Harry might have been taken from them permanently.
/"I'm sorry Severus, but it has been six months. There have been no demands from Voldemort nor any sign of Harry. I think it's time for you to think about the possibility that Harry might no longer be among the living."/
And like a fool, he had. He had thought about it, talked to Albus and in the end the man's subtle magic had worked its power over him. He had devoted all his time to his son and Harry had slipped to back of his mind, almost forgotten even.
/Everytime Draco would try to talk to me about him but I would divert the subject. I haven't even told Silas about Harry, the one who gave birth to him./
"Severus?"
HaHHHHH
He jerked out of his thoughts to come face to face with a worried Remus.
"Lupin," he rasped out, voice choked with emotions.
"I heard…"
"Yes. It is Harry. He's been here all this time. Voldemort and the others have kept him here alive."
Remus' eyes darkened with shock and guilt.
"Alive… Is he… How is he?"
Broken, thought Severus bitterly. Insane, abused, degraded to the point of not caring.
"He… is not well. They weren't idle with him."
A heavy silence enveloped them. They stood there, still as statues until soft stumbling steps alerted them to the approach of someone from the room. Draco emerged carrying the green eyed man who was wearing nothing but a sheet and a collar with a broken chain.
"He's asleep," said Draco softly. "I couldn't get the chain off. It's been spelled. We'll need a locksmith or the key."
The air was charged with suppressed magic and the two older men realized it was Draco. The blonde was noticeably upset and it was affecting his powers. His grey eyes were molten silver at the moment, telling everyone he was on the verge of losing control.
"Draco, let me carry him."
There was an ache in Severus voice which gave away his longing to touch his mate again but Draco stepped away from him, arms tightening around the sleeping figure.
"Draco…?" Remus glanced questioningly at the younger man, puzzled about his actions. Severus was too shocked to do anything but stare.
"I don't think it's a good idea."
Severus barely restrained his flinch even as Remus exclaimed in shock.
"Draco, what are you saying?! Severus is his mate!"
Cold, slate eyes just stared back at them, tempered only by a wealth of sadness and sorrow.
"I spent three years trying to convince him Harry was alive. Each time I was turned away, ignored. There are things in Harry's past Snape, that you knew nothing about. Actions, which you should have noticed, and tried to get him to explain. Instead, you placed all your faith into Dumbledore. You let him blind you and lead you down a less painful path. YOU LEFT HIM!"
By now Draco had backed away ten steps and was rigid with anger. His whole body was tense and the air crackled audibly with his magic.
"I thought you would be the last to give up. You seemed to love him so much. Yet, you were the first to turn away. You pushed everything of your time together into a neat little box and left it to rot. I've noticed Snape, when you talk to Silas, you mention nothing of Harry. Haven't you looked around your chambers? Everything indicates a solitary person with a child. There is no indication that Harry ever had a place in your life."
Severus staggered back as if the words were a physical blow. It was true, he realized in growing horror. He had let all his memories, all his determination and trust in his husband be washed away under Dumbledore's influence and his own desperate attempts to escape the harsh reality that Harry might have suffered a fate far worse than death.
/But that's not how it worked out, did it Severus?/ sneered a voice in his mind. /You wanted to believe so badly that he was gone, free from torture that you left him to suffer needlessly for three years. You essentially, killed Harry./
"I… I didn't…" Severus stuttered, trying to find the right words but there were none. Remus was supporting him in concern as he watched the dark haired man turn so pale he was almost translucent. He didn't see Draco's expression change to one of guilt and regret. The young man addressed his old Potions Master again.
"There were things I should have told you. Harry told it to me in confidence but still I should have told you. I regret not doing that now. Maybe, maybe it would have made a difference." Straightening his shoulders, Draco continued firmly, "Even so, it is too late for speculation. What happened, happened. But I will tell you certain things I should have in the first place, Snape. If you are ever going to get Harry to look at you without him killing himself in self-loathing, you are going to have to know."
Severus could do nothing but nod weakly at the blonde who turned his back to them and walked away swiftly with his precious bundle.
"Severus, don't be so hard on yourself. Draco was speaking in anger and guilt. Severus are you listening?"
He heard the words but it didn't register. Nothing did except the sight of his husband chained to the bed naked, surrounded by sex toys of every kind and torture items. In his mind, all he saw were the scars on that pale flesh made by them and the submissive, broken look in those glassy green orbs. Gone was the fire and joy of life which made them glow, all that remained was a dull green devoid of life or will.
/My fault. All my fault./
"Harry…" he choked out. And uncaring of the man beside him, Severus Snape began to weep.
~*~
He woke up in an unfamiliar room. Looking around him he saw several other beds which were unoccupied and a table beside each one and one more at the foot of the beds.
Where was he? Those strange people who had come into his world and dragged him to the surface were gone. But that pale man, the one with hair like the Other, had held him gently and he had felt safe. Only the Other had ever done that.
It was strange, he mused, that this man resembled the Other so much. Maybe they were related? But he had never seen this one before. Only the Other.
"You're awake."
His head whipped to his right and he saw the pale man again. Smiling shyly, he lowered his eyes to the bed and nodded. Would this one be gentle with him as well?
A gentle hand touched his chin, nudging him to lift his head. His wide green eyes, filled with shock met soft, worried grey.
"Do you know where you are?"
He shook his head. Memories beyond the dark were hazy and filled with pain and uncertainty. He always shied away from them. Now, they were almost non-existent.
"What about a name? What's your name?"
Again, he shook his head. He couldn't remember and no one had seen fit to give him one.
"Why don't you speak?"
Silence this time. Draco bit his lip in frustration and anxiety. Pomfrey had done a thorough check up on Harry and discovered nothing a little rest and care couldn't fix. But mentally, Draco knew he had a long way to go. Right now though, he would settle for hearing Harry speak.
"Alright, I won't force you to speak but you should know your name at least. It's Harry Snape, formerly Harry Potter."
Snape? That name made him feel strange. Something like happiness and self-derision warred within him. Why? It was just a name. Why affect him so?
"Harry, my name is Draco Malfoy. Do you remember me at all?"
Malfoy… Wasn't that the Other's name? Then this one must be related.
Draco watched in surprise as Harry's wary expression melted away to be replaced by a warm, welcoming smile. His heart jumped at the thought that maybe his friend did remember him after all. That thought was promptly destroyed as Harry's lips, soft and pliant met his own. The other man pressed himself enticingly against the blonde, eliciting a soft moan from the unprepared blonde.
The sound of his voice brought Draco to his senses and he quickly pushed Harry away, taking a step back for safety.
/What was that? Why would he react this way?/
"Why?" was all he managed to ask the silent man before him. He never expected a reply.
"You are like Him… gentle…" Harry's voice was soft and whispery from disuse. Vocal cords which had been dormant for three years began to wake up.
Draco went cold. Surely Harry couldn't have mixed him up with Severus?
"Who is Him, Harry?"
Harry leaned forward and gently touched the long blonde locks reverently.
"…like Him… even the hair… color… all the same…"
/Oh my god./
His father. Somehow, in his captivity, Draco's father had managed to get Harry into a position where the young man adored him. And from what had just happened earlier, willing to give his body over to him.
"Oh Harry…"
Looking at the uncomprehending face before him, he reached out to gently stroke a pale cheek as he struggled not to cry.
/When we finally do get your memory back, you're going to hate yourself so much. So much more than you did before. Will we lose you this time? Really lose you? By your own hand?/
"Harry, you need to rest some more. I'll be back in a while. Until then you stay here, understand?"
An obedient nod was returned.
Without looking back, Draco walked out of the infirmary to meet with one Severus Snape.
~*~
He found the Potions Master brooding in front of the fire in his living room. The dungeons were as chilly as ever and even in the middle of summer the underground rooms needed help to remain heated at a tolerable temperature.
"Severus."
The Potions Master jerked around to see Draco standing by his desk, an unfamiliar Pensieve beside him.
The blonde was troubled. Very much so. Something about Harry had caused this. He could see it from the way the grey eyes restlessly studied the room, avoiding his gaze. He only could not discern if it was anything recent or because of the secrets he had kept for Harry which he was now going to reveal.
Draco straightened his shoulders and picked up the Pensieve, making his way over to Severus and seating himself opposite him. Placing the bowl on the table between them, he stared at it for a moment, coming to terms with himself for what he was about to do before abruptly meeting the older man's gaze.
"What you are about to see Severus, are Harry's memories. Memories from before Hogwarts until when he finally came to reside here permanently. What you see here, you must swear on your life and magic to never tell a soul. If anyone ever found out, I fear that we would have recovered Harry only to lose him again should he know. As it is, I shouldn't even be letting you see this."
"Why are you telling me now? Oaths such as yours are not broken lightly." Severus kept his voice level and neutral but inside he was churning with anger and hurt. Why had Harry confided in Draco? Why not him? Wasn't Severus his mate?
"Because Harry loves you. He did then and does now but it's destroying him like a cancer. He cannot fight his demons alone and while he should have seeked out your help, once you see, you will understand why he came to me instead. Now Severus, do you swear?"
Severus knew that Draco would leave and never speak of this again should he balk now. The young Malfoy had already lost faith in him but was allowing him a chance. A way to make it up to Harry. If he could.
"I do so swear, on my life and my magic to never tell a soul through any medium of communication whatsoever, the knowledge which will be revealed to me tonight in this room."
Draco nodded, satisfied. "Alright the Severus, take my hand. I'll guide you to the memories you need to see."
Severus took the pale hand and a moment later the world dissolved around them.
~*~
~ Screaming.
He could hear someone screaming.
/A child./ His mind told him. The voice was young.
Then the surroundings coalesced together in terrifying panorama.
/Oh dear lord…/
On the bed, face down screaming in agony was a child no older than four. Atop him was a hulking man who was thrusting himself into the young body beneath him with abandon. He was obviously delighting in the screams the boy was emitting and Severus felt bile rise in his throat as the boy's eyes opened to reveal verdant, pain filled emerald orbs.
/No…/
"This was the first he could remember clearly. There were others before but they are blurred in his mind. All one entity. All one face. His uncle."
Draco's face was pinched and sorrowful. This was the second time in all his life that he ever witnessed the past of his friend.
"His uncle raped him?"
"Yes, and sold him. Harry is attractive as you know and as a child his helplessness drew the more sadistic kinds of people to him. Pale skin, dark hair and brilliant green eyes. His uncle made quite a lot of money. It continued in the house until he turned seven."
The scene blurred and another memory formed around them.
"Please sir, I have no where to go. Please help me."
Pleading eyes looked up at the man, the frail hand clinging to the longcoat. The man looked down in surprise before a more sinister emotion passed across his face.
"Have you no home, child? No family?"
Young Harry shook his head. "No sir. I'm an orphan."
Severus was horrified. "What is he doing?!" Why was Harry soliciting men on the street at age seven? What was he doing on the streets at all?
"The neighbours grew suspicious or nosy I suppose. Not even Harry knows why but his uncle began to force him to sell himself on the streets otherwise he would be whipped and starved."
Severus was in shock. He watched numb, as his eyes saw the young child allow himself be used and abused by all manner of people. Sometimes one at a time, sometimes in groups.
"Harry said he would guess that almost twenty would use him a night."
Severus couldn't breathe. Certain things fell into place. How Harry would never let Severus take him unless he could somehow see his lover. Why he always kept two candles burning while they slept. The way he was so adamant that their bedroom remain off limits to anyone, even the house elves. The locks he had had installed the moment he moved in and the multitude of spells he put on it every night without fail.
"There's more. This was the basis for his low self-esteem and self-worth. The next memory shows you how he fell into loathing himself."
Again the images shifted.
A large man gently stroked young 9 year old Harry's cheek, who was kneeling on the floor before him. The child purred and nuzzled his uncle's hand before bending down to kiss his feet.
"Good boy. Now look at me, boy."
Harry looked up meeting his uncle's lust filled gaze.
"What are you boy? Why are you on your knees?"
There was no hesitation when he answered. His voice did not even quaver, so well-trained was he.
"I'm a whore, master. I'm on my knees because I am not worthy to stand like a person."
"And why are you not worthy? What makes you a whore?"
"Because I do bad things. I let people touch me in my private places. I'm a whore because I do it willingly."
"And do you like being a whore? Being used for nothing but sex?"
"Yes, master. I like it very much."
Draco tightened his grip on the Potion Master's arm as the older man tried to hex Harry's Muggle
uncle who had begun to molest his nephew.
"There's nothing we can do! This is past and gone! Besides, the muggle is dead!"
Severus growled deep in his throat. He knew Draco was right, but watching as his mate was conditioned from childhood to believe he was nothing more than a sex toy caused rational thought to disappear from his mind.
"How dare he! How dare he make Harry think he was doing it willingly!"
"Alright, that's it. I'm taking you out. You're starting to froth at the mouth."~
~*~
Again their surroundings melted into nothingness, but this time when it reformed, it was the walls of the dungeons which greeted them.
The moment Severus got his bearings he collapsed. All the anger transmuting itself into a wave of
grief.
"Why didn't he tell me? Why didn't I see it?"
Draco gave the older man an unreadable stare.
"Because he's had years to practice hiding it. And in the end he doesn't really think he's hiding anything at all. He believes himself to be of little to no value. Striving to prove himself to everyone, to live up to their expectations, never uttering a word against them. In a sense, while you always saw him as a rule breaker he was actually obeying the unspoken, unwritten instructions laid before him."
Then Severus heard Draco's voice turn heavy with emotion.
"And then there was the issue of his heritage to contend with. Were you aware that Harry had fae blood? Nymph blood to be exact."
Severus went cold. It suddenly made sense. How everyone was inexplicably attracted to Harry. Why his uncle who abhorred anything magical would cross his own boundaries and touch his nephew in the foulest way.
"No…"
There was a legend among wizard kind. A folk tale among muggles about the nymphs and those with their blood. The blood of nymphs did not dilute as generations went on. They remained in the genes as powerful as a full blooded nymph. Because of this, many would be attracted to them but many knew better than to give in. Muggles rarely ran across them and even then they were reluctant to allow their minds to perceive their desire which had no logic for someone they never knew or wasn't even of the right gender.
The magical communities left the nymphs to their own devices, much like they did the High Elves and the nymphs did the same. A joining of nymph with any other race was rare but not unheard of. However, some of the less upright wizards did try to capture the nymphs. Usually all they needed was one. The legend stated that should a person have intercourse with a nymph, he or she would excel in whatever they did. However it would only be once each time. Thus, for a painter, one time to bed a nymph would give him one breathtaking painting. Should he want another he would have to bed the nymph again. It was one of the main reasons nymphs rarely let themselves be seen and those with their blood never ever mentioned it lest they be captured and raped by others.
That Harry had nymph blood explained his uncle's overwhelming lust. It also became doubly damning when he realized that Petunia as Lily's sister would have known about the legend and probably told her husband.
"Yes. And you are right. His uncle knew. That was one of the major reasons he would rape Harry as well."
Severus swallowed convulsively and as the rage ran through his veins, he wished that that scum who had hurt his mate was still alive so he could kill him himself. Draco avoided Severus gaze. Both of them were too emotional and unguarded at the moment. Finally, it was Severus who spoke first. His voice was soft, a sibilant note of menace lacing it as he tried to keep himself in check.
"Is there more?"
Draco nodded, closing his eyes only to open them again quickly. His mind's eye still seeing the image of his friend broken and battered.
"It's basically the same. Up until after the Tournament. In our fourth year, something changed. He had become withdrawn and troubled. I saw it but I don't know what happened to change him. It was at the beginning of fifth year when I approached him for help. A little over 5 months, we had come to trust each other and began to tell me little things, small fears. Later, we divulged other secrets. It wasn't until end of the year after my third mission did I find out Harry wasn't just suffering from simple lack of confidence. I tried to help the best I could, and then he fell in love with you."
Severus looked up from where he had been staring to meet blank grey eyes.
"It was the best and worst thing that ever happened to him."
It hurt. That statement, made with no malice and no anger. Just stating a fact. It hurt. It must have shown for Draco's eyes dropped and he rubbed his eyes tiredly.
"When he fell in love with you, it made determined to get over whatever was bothering him. It helped him out of his deperession. But at the same time, it made him insecure. All the teachings, all the words he had been told growing up began to resurface. He became insecure of himself. He never doubted his magic, but even when he was pregnant he lived in constant fear that you would leave him. That you would find someone 'better', someone 'clean' as he puts it."
"I would n…" /Never, Severus? But you did leave him. You abandoned him at the most crucial moment. You broke your vow and without a second thought either./
Wrenching his thoughts away, he found Draco looking at him with an expression which mirrored his inner thoughts. Pursing his kips for a moment, the blonde did not say anything but continued speaking. Here, Severus could see the tension returning to his shoulders. Why?
"Harry was afraid that once people found out about him, they would turn on you. Claim that you took advantage of him and used him for your own pleasure. He didn't want that to happen. He was terrified of ruining what would be a chance for you to have a happier life. And yet, he loves you so much that he couldn't bear to leave. The very thought of leaving your side would make him hysterical."
Severus kept quiet as Draco fell silent. He could see the blonde was trying to prepare himself for whatever it was he was going to tell Severus next. More than likely, it would be worst than anything else he had heard so far but he would listen. Too many secrets, all bringing trouble. He only hoped they weren't revealed too late.
~*~
A soft hand, weathered by age and experience caressed his face. He opened his eyes and met another distant pair. Familiar. They eyes were so familiar. This face, he could remember vaguely having seen this face before. It made him feel repulsed yet warm at the same time. Like he should obey and yet not.
But a slave never disobeyed. A pet was always obedient. And a tool must be used.
Rising from the bed, he silently crawled onto the man's lap and sank down on the exposed erection. He let out a silent moan as he felt the man enter him. It burned without and preparation but he was used to it and it did not deter him. Knowing what the man wanted, he bowed his head in submission as he began to move around the man.
Hands grabbed his hips as the man began to thrust up to him in rhythm. They continued like this for a few minutes before the man let out a soft his and he felt the man spill his seed within him. Getting up, he knelt before the man and licked him clean. The man was smiling and reached down to pat his head softly. Well done, it meant. The man waved his wand and he felt a strange sensation within him and realized that the semen in him had been cleaned. He ducked his head in thanks and stayed on his knees until the man left, robes swishing around him.
The and only then, did he climb back into bed, falling asleep quickly. It would seem that this place wasn't very different from his other home at all.
