Chapter Four

A/N- I know that my update speed is TERRIBLE, and I humbly beg for your forgiveness. I am going to make a serious effort to update this at least once a week from now on. I know that Syd's monologue is quite awkward and much too long, but bear with me because the end is better (I think).

Reviews- Again, thank you so much to everyone who has already reviewed. I cannot possibly put into words how much reviews mean to me, I need them more than water or air or any of those so-called necessities (Have you ever read 'Love is Not All' by Edna St. Vincent Millay? That's how I feel, except about reviews instead of love). Please, Please, Please Review!!!!!!!

Disclaimer-You didn't REALLY think that I invented all this, did you? No, I thought not.

When Sydney began her drive, she was absolutely ecstatic. As she neared the warehouse, however, her mood began to lessen slightly as questions began to run wild through her brain. She no longer doubted that telling Vaughn how she felt was the right thing to do. But that wouldn't make anything easier. The risks were still incredible and the punishment if they were caught by the CIA or SD-6 would be severe. And what exactly did he expect from her? Was his declaration of love an 'I know that we can't do anything yet' or an 'I think it's worth the risks now'? Not only that, but, more in the short term, what would she say to him? His message had been so beautiful. What could she possibly say that would mean as much to him? Every phrase or sentence that came to mind seemed clichéd or cold, or simply not something that she would say.

Sydney laughed softly. She would simply have to do what her job had trained her so intensively for-improvise.

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There had never been any question as to who would arrive first-he was always there before she was, no matter what the circumstances. Normally she didn't mind this setup much. They lived in a world where the upper hand changed in the blink of an eye and where people came back from the dead. Under such conditions, it was nice to know that at least one small thing could stay the same. Today, however, Sydney would much rather have had some time to prepare herself before meeting with him. Ah, well, one couldn't have everything. Sydney stepped out of her car, smoothed her skirt, tucked back her hair (silently admitting to Dixon that it MIGHT be her 'thing'), and walked briskly toward the warehouse.

Inside, Vaughn heard her car door and stiffened. 'Okay, Michael, this is it,' he told himself. 'Don't fidget, don't be too pushy, let her talk first..' his steam of mental advice was abruptly halted as she came into view, replaced by the only thought that his brain would send him: 'God, she's so beautiful'. Her hair was down, her attire was simple and her makeup minimal, but she was still a Goddess to him. His eyes traveled first to the rose in her hand (HIS rose, his mind reminded him with a very slight smugness), then up to her face. She blushed slightly but held his eyes. She started to say something, and then paused, deciding to take it slow.

"Hi," she said softly. 'Wow, Syd, that was deep,' her mind taunted her.

"Hi," he replied, never taking his eyes from hers. The electricity between them was stronger than ever before, which was definitely saying something.

Deciding that if she didn't start talking now she never would, Sydney began to speak. "Vaughn..this may not come out quite the way I want it to, but...well, you know the life that I lead, the life that we both lead and you know better than anyone that it's not often that I actually get to speak from the heart," she looked down briefly, smiling with one corner of her mouth. "In fact, lately I haven't been able to say what I really feel at all. So to bare my heart completely.." she trailed off, taking a deep breath. "That's not easy for me to do."

He nodded gently, his eyes offering silent support but his mouth staying shut, knowing that interruption wouldn't help her now.

She continued, "When I got your package this morning, listened to what you said..I was floored completely." She noticed the look of fear leap onto his face and hastily added, "Not in a bad way! It was.." she searched for an adequate word, "The kindest, sweetest, and most wonderful thing that's happened to me since..since I don't know when."

He didn't know whether to be hopeful or afraid; so far she hadn't rejected him, but he sensed a 'but' coming on.

"But," his stomach turned at the word, "I wasn't quite sure how to respond. I knew that I had feelings for you, feelings beyond friendship but.." she stopped to gather her thoughts, "I was afraid at first to call it love. I mean, every man I've loved since I became a spy is..well, either dead or has gone through living hell. And for awhile it was like..like if I didn't call it love even to me that I could save you from that."

"Anyway, about five minutes after I opened your package I realized that I was already late for a meeting at SD-6 and basically made a mad dash out the door." Vaughn was severely confused at this point; what did this have to do with what she had just been saying? "Because I was so hurried, I left your note on the table, and Francie found it." His eyes lit up in alarm. What exactly had he written in that note? He hadn't reread it, had made no corrections, knowing that if he did so he would loose his nerve. Was there something in that note that Francie shouldn't have seen? Sydney obligingly answered his unspoken question, "It was pretty vague, but she gathered enough from it to guess that it was sent by a man, and, being Francie, she wanted all the juicy details." Sydney gulped. Her words were coming out slower as she got closer and closer to the point of her ramble. "I told her as much as I could, lied when I had to. Eventually she asked for your name, and when I told her that it was Michael.." a shiver ran through her. When would she stop having that reaction to his given name? Never, she hoped. "..She immediately said 'You love him'. And..well, I knew that she was right. I do love you, Vaughn. You are the person who keeps me sane through the hard times and makes me smile during the good. You are the person who knows my strengths AND my weaknesses and takes them both together. You are the one person who has had a million chances to make me cry but never have, and I know never will. And, most of all, you are the person who assures me that every cloud DOES have a silver lining, because despite all of the darkness and pain that my job has brought me, it also brought you, and that makes it worth it all."

He didn't speak and she glanced up slowly, dreading what that silence might mean. She knew that she had been rambling, and feared that it had been too much too quickly, that maybe his feelings didn't run as deep. She needn't have worried. Meeting his eyes, she found that his face was plastered in a ridiculous grin that made her laugh out loud. He laughed too, both of them feeling as though an immense weight had been lifted from them.

"Syd," he said softly, that name a whisper, a caress. His endless green eyes held hers, his smile still very much present but toned down a notch. "What's a guy to say to that?"

She realized how close they were to each other, how much he was affecting her even without touch. 'Time to change that,' she decided. Her eyes still locked with his, she slid her arms around his neck, moved closer to him and whispered, "Nothing," so softly that he wouldn't have heard it were she not so close.

Every place she touched him set fire to his skin, the electricity between them striking like lightning and spreading mercilessly. Her eyes were deep but held a note of teasing as well, a note that he decided to act upon. Leaning in to her, his lips so close to her ear that a single centimeter closer would have brought them into contact, he murmured, "If I shouldn't talk then what should I do?"

She instantly loved the teasing note in his voice; this was a side of his character that she hadn't seen before. She pulled back just enough so that he could see her face before saying, "I thought you're supposed to be the one who gives me the plan, Agent Vaughn." Normally the title would have offended him slightly (coming from Syd, of course), but the tone of her voice turned it into a term of endearment rather than one authority.

"Well, then," his voice sank lower as he moved his face almost painfully close to hers, "We could try th.." The last word was cut off as their lips met, softly at first, but soon deepening as all of the restrained emotion of the past year came crashing in upon them. Her arms tightened around his neck, fingers snaking through his hair; his hands had found their way, seemingly without any direction whatever, to her back, pulling her even closer. They lingered for a small eternity, touching and tasting, their pleasure all the sweeter because it was forbidden. Finally lack of air forced them apart, but they stayed in each other's arms, letting their eyes say all the things that they could not.

Suddenly, from the doorway, issued a voice that both of them hated but knew only too well.

"Well, well, well, Agent Bristow, we have been a bad little girl.."

A/N: Cliffhangers are all in the Alias spirit, after all. Review, Review, Review!!!!! I need to know what I'm doing wrong with the romance; I'm really more of an angst writer myself.