TOA The Lesbian Wedding
Hey, thanks for the great reviews. And the 1st chapter is fixed. Boy, if I had a penny for every time I wrote "t-shit" in place of "t-shirt" I'd be filthy rich. You'd think I'd learn by now, wouldn't you? Anyways, please read and review, thanks!
Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters, blah, blah, blah.
The next morning, Chandler awoke with a pounding headache.
"Oh my God," he complained as he held his head and got out of bed, "What did I do last night?"
Chandler exited his room and walked over to Monica and Rachel's apartment. When he got there, Rachel and Phoebe were sitting at the kitchen table.
"Hey," he greeted weakly as he grabbed a glass of water and aspirin.
Phoebe giggled, "What were you doing last night?"
"I wish I could remember," he sighed as he sat down next to Phoebe.
Rachel laughed loudly all the sudden.
"Could ya keep it down here?" Chandler requested, wincing in pain.
"Sorry, it's just that Monica's got a huge hangover, too."
Chandler's eyes widened in remembrance, "Okay, I…I gotta get going!"
With that he exited the apartment quickly.
"What was that about?" Rachel wondered once he was gone.
"Ehh, it's just Chandler," Phoebe answered nonchalantly.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
After a while, Monica appeared from the bathroom.
"Hey Mon," Rachel asked, "Feel any better?"
Monica merely mumbled in response as she poured herself a cup of coffee.
"Wild night last night, hmm?"
"Nah, not really."
"You just got
drunk for the hell of it?"
"What's wrong with that?" Phoebe questioned, "I do it all the time. In fact,
I'm drunk right now."
"You are?"
"No, but I fooled ya, didn't I?"
"Right…" Rachel answered, "Anyway, what happened last night?"
"Nothing happened!" she defended, "I just got drunk."
"With Chandler?"
"How did you…" she began, but caught herself, "What are you talking about?" she chuckled nervously, "I didn't get drunk with Chandler."
"Uh huh, sure you didn't," Phoebe teased.
"Did you guys do it?"
"No! We didn't do anything!"
"So why are you so nervous?" Rachel challenged.
"I'm not nervous."
"And," Phoebe added, "He came in here, but left when he remembered whatever you guys did last night!"
"Ha!" Rachel added triumphantly.
"Ok, we almost did it, but we didn't!"
"Oo…details!" Rachel demanded.
"There's nothing to talk about."
"Right…"
"Ok, fine. So, we were bored and he suggested getting hammered. So, we did. And that we were still bored, so, I, uh, suggested, uh…" she stuttered, feeling ashamed of her words.
"What?" Rachel asked, at the edge of her seat.
"And I suggested…making out."
"Oo, wow!" Phoebe enthused.
"So what happened?"
"So we made out. Then we stopped and he suggested having sex and…"
"You agreed?"
"Well…I was really drunk!" she defended.
"Plus, it's been such a long time…for both of you."
Monica gave Phoebe an angry look, but then looked away shamefully.
"But you didn't do it?" Rachel questioned.
"No, Joey came in and ruined the moment."
"Damn!" Phoebe complained.
"What?"
"Well, I've always wondered what Chandler would be like in bed. I just don't wanna have sex with him."
Rachel narrowed her eyes, "Okay…anyway…do you still wanna do it?"
Monica laughed uneasily as she began to rub her arms, "No, of course I don't! I mean it's Chandler."
Rachel gasped, "You still wanna do it!"
"Oh my God! It's so wrong, it's so wrong! It's Chandler…I mean it's Chandler!" Monica rambled.
"So what? You know he wants you, too!" Phoebe informed Monica.
"What? He does?"
"Yeah. Have you seen the way he looks at you?"
"He doesn't look at me any differently than…"
"Yeah, sweetie," Rachel agreed, "He definitely does."
"Woah, this is coming from the woman who didn't even know that Ross had a crush on her until like a few months ago!"
"Well, it's hard to tell when it's a crush on yourself that a guy has!"
Monica sat down, dejectedly, "What should I do?"
"Tell him," Rachel advised.
"I dunno…"
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Joey walked out of his room to find Chandler sitting on a chair with the TV on, yet not watching it.
"Hey Chandler, what's up?"
"Nothing's up!" Chandler defended hastily, "Nothing at all!"
"Okay, sheesh." Joey stared at Chandler for a moment.
"What?!"
"I didn't think anything was wrong till you answered me like that."
Chandler growled and shut off the television.
"It's nothing."
"You're getting this weird over nothing? I haven't seen you act like this since that time you dropped your house key down the drain."
"For the last time, Joey! You dropped my key down the drain, not me!"
"Yeah, right," Joey admitted sheepishly.
"Okay, I'll tell you, but first you have to swear to keep it a secret!"
"I swear."
"That means not telling anyone else."
"Right. I got
it."
"Okay…I, uh, I almost slept with Monica."
Joey gasped, "Monica as in our friend Monica?"
"What other Monicas do you know?"
"Oh my God! You almost slept with Monica! Oh my God, this is huge!"
"I knew I shouldn't have told you!"
"Right, no, I won't say anything."
"You'd better not."
"So…you gonna, ya know, finish what you started?"
"I doubt she wants to. I mean she was really drunk."
"Do you want to?"
"Hell yeah! Who wouldn't?"
"Good point."
"I really like her…a lot, Joe."
"You do?"
"Yeah. I have for a while now. And this definitely didn't help. What should I do?"
"Well, you could tell her."
"Thanks," he replied sarcastically, "Because I wouldn't have thought of that otherwise.
"Well, excuse me, Mr. Big Shot. If you don't want my advice…"
"Sorry," he paused and looked away, "What if she doesn't like me?"
"But what if she does?"
"Yeah right."
"You'll never know until you ask. Besides, what have you got to lose?"
"Well my dignity, my respect, my friend, my…"
"Okay, so you have a lot to lose. But it could be really great."
"I can't believe I'm taking advice from a guy who hasn't had a relationship that's lasted longer than…"
"Woah, since when do I have 'relationships'?"
"Right."
"Look dude, you're never gonna know if you keep talking to me."
"You're right, you're right," Chandler relented, "I'm gonna go find her!"
Chandler headed for the door, but Joey called back to him, "Wait! You may wanna comb your hair first." Joey patted his own head as to illustrate, "You've got some hair sticking up…"
Chandler groaned and he went into the bathroom.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Monica sat on the sofa in her apartment, biting her fingernail nervously.
"Mon," Rachel complained from the kitchen, "Just go tell him."
"No, I don't wanna seem too desperate."
"Right," she quipped, "Because sitting around the apartment chewing your fingernails is much better."
Monica shot her an angry look and then picked up a magazine. However, she barely looked at it. Just kept flipping through the pages.
After a few minutes, Chandler entered the apartment nervously.
"Chandler," Monica whispered.
"Hey Mon, can I, uh, talk to you for a minute?"
"Yeah, sure," Monica said and got up from the sofa and headed towards Chandler, who was standing near the door.
"Umm…Mon," he began, but then turned his attention, as did Monica, to Rachel. Chandler cleared his throat, "Do you mind? We're trying to have a private conversation here."
"Right," Rachel smiled, but didn't move.
Chandler gave her a look and she smiled sheepishly, "Maybe I'll go into my room and, uh, organize my, uh, bed sheets."
"Good," Monica added, "Go do that."
Once she left, Chandler turned back towards Monica.
"Mon, I…" he was cut off when she kissed him hard on the lips. When she broke the kiss, she looked away, nervously.
"Well…" he began, "Not the way I was gonna say it, but, wow."
"What were you gonna say?"
"I was going to tell you that I really like you."
Monica smiled shyly, "Yeah?"
"Yeah."
She looked at him skeptically, "You're not drunk again, are you?"
He smiled and shook his head reassuringly, and kissed her passionately. When the kiss ended, he smiled into her eyes.
"Dinner tomorrow at seven?"
"Sounds great."
He brushed her cheek with his hand and left the apartment.
Monica stood there with a small smile on her face. "Oh my God," she breathed as she moved towards her room.
So, how was chapter 2? I'm really cold right now. It's always freezing in my house in the winter. I mean we have a heater, but who would think to use it? Ok, please leave me a review, thanks! Happy Holidays!:)
