TOA the Lesbian Wedding
Ok, I'm tired and have nothing to say, so this will finally be a short author's note. Anyway, please read and review, thanks! Oh please excuse my many mistakes that are probably in here…more than usual…because I'm tired.
Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters…*yawn*
Monica entered Central Perk to find that Phoebe and Rachel were there, sitting on the orange couch.
"Hey guys," she greeted, smiling happily.
"Hey, what's with all the smiles?" Phoebe questioned.
"I take it things went well with Chandler, huh?" Rachel questioned with a teasing smile on her face.
Monica smiled and looked away. "Maybe."
"Oooh, what happened?" Phoebe questioned enthusiastically.
"He asked me out for tomorrow at 7."
"Wow, he asked you out? "Phoebe informed her, "Ya know, I thought Chandler was just looking for a girl to, ya know, with."
"Well he's not," Monica stated confidentially.
"Phoebe does have a point," Rachel agreed, "Since when has Chandler been in a serious relationship?"
"Well…" Monica began, thinking hard, "There was Janice."
"He broke up with and got back together with her so many times, that I can't even count."
"Yeah, and why was he together with her anyway? I mean he didn't like her. He was just desperate for a girlfriend and some sex," Rachel added.
"No way," Monica answered, less confidently than before, "Chandler wouldn't do that to me."
"What makes you so sure?"
"I…I don't know. He just wouldn't."
"Just because he's your friend doesn't mean he's gonna be a good boyfriend."
"Boyfriend, ha!" Phoebe told her, "He wouldn't last a minute in a relationship. Especially not one with you."
"What!? What do you mean?"
"Oh come on," Rachel explained, "He's going to be so freaked out when you start all your 'where is this relationship going?' and 'when are we gonna get married and have kids' crap."
"What?"
"I mean can you picture Chandler with a family?"
Phoebe started laughing hysterically. "The thought it's just…so absurd!" "Okay…" Monica said and then walked out of the coffee house dejectedly.
"Wow, I can't believe she bought that," Rachel told Phoebe.
"I know. I thought we'd need much more convincing than that."
"I feel kind of bad," Rachel admitted.
"Yeah, but it's for their own good. I mean this is their big relationship test. If they can make it through this, than that means they're meant for each other."
"Yeah, you're right. I hope we didn't meddle in anything too big for us to handle.
"I just hope Joey had an okay time convincing Chandler that Monica doesn't want him, too."
"Yeah, that a bigger problem, isn't it?"
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
"Woah, woah, woah," Joey asked, "She said yes?"
Chandler smiled broadly, "Yes!"
"She said yes?" he repeated.
"Yes," Chandler answered, beginning to become irritated, "Why do you keep repeating it?"
"Oh no reason, except that, well ya know, it's Monica."
"Really, I didn't know that," he said sarcastically.
"No, it's Monica. I didn't think she'd say yes to you. Wow, she must be really desperate."
"What? You told me to go after her!"
"Well, yeah, you were mopping around in front of the TV and I wanted to watch, so I had to get you out of the apartment somehow."
"Excuse me?"
"What?"
"What?! What do you think! I trusted you."
"Oh come on. You really thought you had a chance with Monica. I mean she never even did it with me."
"So?"
"So…why would a girl say no to me and yes to you?"
"Good point. But she kissed me!"
"Woah, she kissed you?"
"Yeah."
"Wow, she's more desperate than I thought."
"What? No, she likes me!"
Joey started laughing hysterically.
"Why is that so hard to believe?"
"It's just you," he said between laughs, "And Monica…that's as bad as me and Ross."
"I cannot believe you just said that!"
"Yeah, your right. Ross could never get a guy like me."
Chandler threw his hands up in the air in resignation. "Oh my God!" he yelled frustrated and went into his room, slamming the door.
Joey picked up his sandwich and took a bite out of it. With his mouth full of food he chuckled, "Chandler is so gullible!"
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Later that day, Monica entered Chandler and Joey's apartment and knocked on Chandler's bedroom door.
"Yeah?" he asked sadly.
She opened the door and Chandler sat up when he noticed it was Monica.
"Umm…Chandler…" she began nervously, "It turns out I can't uhh…go out with you because I have to umm…do my laundry."
"Yeah, ya know what, that's okay because umm…there's this special on uhh…the history channel about Monks that I'm very interested in and I didn't really want to miss it."
"Right, Monks. Very interesting."
"Yes."
They both remained still in the awkward silence that formed around them.
"So, I should, uh, go."
"Yeah, have fun with the…umm…laundry."
"Yeah, and you enjoy you're uhh…Monk show."
When Monica left, Chandler fell forward, head first, into his pillow.
"Oh my God!" he cried, "Joey's right! She doesn't want to date me!"
Meanwhile, Monica walked back towards her apartment sadly. She walked into the room without even acknowledging Rachel's presence.
"Hun, are you okay?" she questioned sadly.
"You were right," she cried, "He doesn't want me!"
"Aww…honey…" she soothed as she wrapped her arms around Monica, "It'll be okay."
"How will it be okay? I can't stop thinking about him Rach! And he doesn't feel the same way!"
Rachel looked away from her crying friend, with a pained expression on her face.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
"Phoebe?" Rachel called as she and Joey entered Phoebe's apartment.
"Coming!" Phoebe called. She came out with a hand full of pinecones. "Sorry, I was just organizing my collection."
"You collect pinecones?"
"Yeah! Well, ya know, they need a good home, away from people kicking them and stepping on them and ya know."
"Right…"
"Cool!" Joey enthused.
"I know. Anyway, what's up, guys?"
"We have to stop messing with Chandler and Monica and just explain everything," Joey told her.
"Why?"
"They're both heartbroken."
"Yeah, Chandler won't get out of his bed!" Joey informed her.
"And Monica…she was crying for like two hours, and she's now stuffing herself with ice cream. The good ice cream Pheebs, the good ice cream!"
"Okay, so maybe we shouldn't have messed with them."
"Ya think?"
"Okay, we can fix this, right?" Phoebe asked.
Rachel bit her lip, "I sure hope so."
"Ok, so let's think of a plan."
"Ooooh, I know!"
"What, Joey?"
"We get them really drunk and then you two and Monica make out."
"Joey!" Rachel requested, "Don't talk!"
"Gotcha!"
"We just have to tell them the truth," Phoebe decided.
Joey and Rachel nodded in agreement.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
"Come on Chandler!" Joey tried for the tenth time, "Just get out of the damn bed."
"No, I don't want to! You can't make me!"
"Come on, we're just gonna go for a nice walk."
"No! You're gonna take me to Monica's aren't you?" he accused, as he pointed a finger at Joey, "I can see it in your eyes!"
"Come on, you have to face her sometime."
"I do not!"
"Oh yeah? Then how will you ever leave the house? Hang out with the other guys? Go to Central Perk."
"I'll leave the apartment really early to go to work and come back late. I just won't see anybody and I'll go to the Starbucks by my work."
Joey gasped, "You take that back!"
"Come on Joe," Chandler said, changing the topic back, "It's just too weird okay? I just can't deal with this. I…I really like her. And I know I shouldn't like her if she doesn't like me, but I can't help it! Oh my god, why does this always happen to me?!"
"Just come over man, please? For me? Come on, I'm your best friend!"
"Uch, I hate when you use that excuse!"
"So you'll come with me?"
"Yes, I will…" he relented.
"Yes, come on!"
Joey grabbed Chandler's arm and physically pulled him out the door.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Meanwhile, Phoebe and Rachel stood outside of Monica's bedroom door.
"Mon? Are you okay hun?" Rachel asked, while knocking on the door.
There was no answer.
"Monica!" Phoebe called, "Come on, open up!"
Still, there was no answer.
"Okay, I'm getting worried," Rachel admitted to Phoebe, "I don't think I've ever seen her this bad."
"Okay," she yelled through the door, "If Monica's not going to open this door, than we'll just have to knock it down. Oh, think of the mess that will…"
Quickly, Monica opened the door.
"Okay, are you happy?" she asked spitefully.
"Come on Mon, it's not as bad as it seems."
"Really? It's not? Because from where I'm standing, it seems like a bed of roses!' she said sarcastically.
"Really?" Phoebe asked, surprised, "I thought it was bad…"
Monica gave her a quizzical look.
"Oh…"
"No, Mon, it seriously isn't as bad as it seems. Just let us explain…"
"Yeah, okay, I don't need to hear any 'it's not you, it's him' crap, okay? Just, leave me alone!"
"But Mon!"
Suddenly, the door opened revealing Joey and Chandler. Monica became visually tense when she noticed Chandler.
"Mon, Chandler, sit down," Rachel told them, "We have to tell you something…"
Ha ha ha! You thought I was gonna be nice and put them together right away, huh? Well, I've got the power! I think it's gone straight to my head. Anyway, I won't keep them apart for much longer, don't worry. He he gave u cliffhanger for once. Ok, hope u still like series, please leave a review! Thanks!
