**disclaimer** I own your soul and nothing else. … Just kidding. XD **Please check out the author's note at the end of this chapter for some crucial information regarding the cure of unwanted facial hairs! Or this fic. Which ever. XD
Tales of a Pilgrimage.
The first moment we met
Ch. 3: Lulu's POV
Aside from traveling around when I was younger as a guardian, I spent most of my years here on Besaid training to be the ultimate black mage in all of Spira. Don't think too much into it. World domination through sex appeal isn't at the top of my to do list…
Wakka
Being a young girl of high class and standards, I didn't mingle much with the common folk. Their twisted simple life and manner of speech really got to me (if I got a belt for every time I heard "ya", I'd have at least forty or fifty new dresses. Hidden garters included.) One day, by some strange flaw of the heavens, I was sitting on the Temple steps when these two redheaded prepubescent infidels were watching me from afar. I tried to ignore them, but it was hard. They would creep up a few feet and when I showed the slightest sign of noticing them, they would stop in their tracks, throw themselves on the ground, and start picking at the grass… as if that was something normal people would do, and thus they shouldn't be thought of as suspicious in any way, shape, or form. My annoyance finally reached its limit and I shouted at them. "What the HELL do you undersized apes think you're doing!?" The taller one responded with "Hi". This, of course, was unacceptable, and so I got angry and set his pants on fire. In a panicked display of frenzy, the boy ran around aimlessly for a few moments, hollering utter nonsense while doing so. I started to pity the poor creature, so I decided to put out the flame with a water spell. But, not knowing any better, he took this as an attempt to end his short-lived existence and chucked his unsuspecting younger brother at me and tried to escape. I chased him down, tackled him to the ground, and threatened to fry his manhood should he ever do something that incompetent again. And thus began the long and somewhat odd companionship of Wakka, Chappu, and myself.
Yuna:
I, for one, always adored her. She was so wide eyed and frightened of the world, and it filled a deep plot hole in my gothic Lolita soul to be able to protected such a fragile creature. However strange she may have been. I used to take her to the beach sometimes when Wakka, Chappu, and the others would practice their infernal game. She loved the beach. It was her favorite place to partake in her favorite pastime (aside from braiding) which was mocking whatever she saw. I mean everything and anything. She'd try to go under the water and hold her breath like the blitzers, and when I pulled her up she'd rant about how I was interfering with her fulfillment of a greater purpose. Something about the Grand Chocobo or… some nonsense like that. Speaking of which, once she covered herself in honey and rolled around the Chocobo barn until she was covered in feathers. She then preceded to
Rikku: needs Ritalin.
Tidus:
When I fist saw him… I didn't know what to say. It was in the temple… all I could think was "Why the hell did Wakka bring this damn Barbie wannabe in here? Of all places!" I wanted to shove my foot up his ass right then and there, but… that would make a bad impression on the little intruder. If anything, he had to see me for the sexy bondage queen of fur and belts that I am. And I think it succeed because just moments after I scolded them both, he came up to me, poked my breasts and inquired about their authenticity. I was very offended so I smacked him away. Wakka thought this was adorable, and he laughed. He even clapped and cheered the little mongrel on like some sort of pet. And he wonders why he didn't make a good first impression on me. Well, as expected with the most recent final fantasy games, Yuna took a liking to him and so I was forced to pretend to like him as well. Things got better as time went on, though. Wakka trained him well enough. I'd give him a cookie every time he did a good job in battle and it kept him out of my hair. So, he's tolerable.
Auron: is almost as sexy as I am. Almost.
And so concludes this chapter as I sit here on this shoopuff… shoefluff… arg, this smelly overgrown elephant with fins. Adeu.
~Lulu
-Hey guys. Sorry it took so long to update! Midterms. Whoosh. I'd like to thank all you who reviewed. And some of you that put this story on your favorites: thanks so much! I didn't expect this much feedback. Hehe. Well…anyway, some things I want to throw at you guys: I definitely want to continue this story, but I'm not sure what events to portray after I get done with the first meetings and such. Any ideas and/or questions you guys have, just throw them at me! I will take it! WAH! Anywho, this promises to be pretty long chapter wise, but they're short, so… yeah.
-I'd like to apologize for the MAJOR inaccuracies I have with some of the story background, mainly with Yuna and Kimari. That's also on my list to be edited (I was only about 15 hours into the game when I wrote this, so… hehe).
Talligo: yeah, you're right. The formatting does suck. After this chapter, I'm going back and doing some editing. (If you guys notice any errors, tell me. Don't be afraid to nit-pick! I like nit picking!) Thanks for the suggestion!
Satanic Mechanic: here's your 3rd chapter, so please leave my innards alone. XD
Timeless Enigma, Von: I hope that I can keep you guys satisfied with the other characters!
Thanks again to everyone. Now… you see that pretty button down there? Yeah, the one that says "go". Something magical happens when you click it… ::big smile::
