Title: May Angels Lead You in . . .
Author: Malfoy (Milk and Apples)
Archive: , fanfiction.net; if you want it, lemme know.
Rating: R
Pairings: Irvine x Zell, Seifer + Zell
Warnings: Yaoi, Lime, Suicide, Angst, OOC, Language
Disclaimer: Final Fantasy 8, Irvine, Seifer, Zell, Squall, Rinoa, Laguna, Balamb Garden, the town of Balamb and Winhill belong to SquareSoft. "Hear you me" belongs to Jimmy Eat World. The storyline and Ally are mine.
Notes: This fic goes along with the song lyrics to "Hear You Me" by Jimmy Eat World. It's a pretty song but I just got this image when I listened to it . . .

"Hear You Me"-
There's no one in town I know. You gave us some place to go. I never said thank you for that. I thought I might get one more chance. What would you think of me now? So lucky, so strong, so proud. I never said thank you for that. Now I'll never have a chance. May angels lead you in. Hear you me my friends. On sleepless roads, the sleepless go. May angels lead you in. So what would you think of me now. So lucky, so strong so proud. I never said thank you for that. Now I'll never have a chance. May angels lead you in. Hear you me, my friends. On sleepless roads, the sleepless go. May angels lead you in. And if you were with me tonight. I'd sing to you just one more time. A song for a heart so big God wouldn't let it live. May angels lead you in. Hear you me, my friends. On sleepless roads, the sleepless go. May angels lead you in

May Angels Lead You in
Thoughts of love filled the head of a manly blond as he treaded along the road from the town of Balamb. He'd been gone for two weeks on SeeD business. Now, he would return to his love, who he missed seeing every day. Seifer Almasy, a man who used to be known as the bully of Balamb Garden, entered the school with a smile of joy on his face.

He held his Hyperion on his shoulder and tried to force himself not to run because of the Hyperion's blade. There were tons of junior students who made it seem impossible to get to the dormitory. The blond was constantly dodging the waist-high students who were either studying, playing cards or imitating the SeeDs and acting like they had weapons of their own. Seifer chuckled at the sight of them.

"Seifer!" a little dark-haired, light-eyed girl called out as she came running toward him. She hugged the blond's right leg.

Her name was Ally and she was six years old. Seifer had kind of raised her as his own child. Ally had been abandoned by her parents at age three. They left her at the front gate of the school early one morning hoping that someone would know what to do with her. Seifer just happened to be the first to notice her and took her to the Headmaster's office. Neither Seifer nor Headmaster Quistis wanted to reject her but Quistis thought it best to put her in an orphanage since she was too young to be able to start school. So, they waited and waited for an opening in acceptance for an orphanage for about six months.

Over that time, Seifer had grown fond of Ally. Especially after finding out that she was Rinoa and Squall's daughter. He could have killed both of them when he found that out. So, Quistis allowed Ally to stay in the Garden as long as Seifer took care of her. Seifer made sure his part of the deal was completed with the help of his lover, Zell Dincht.

He picked her up with his free hand. "How's my girl been? Did Zell watch over you or was he too wrapped up in video games?"

"Fine. Zelly took care of me, and lemme play a scary game. It gave me bad dreams but I'm better now," she giggled.

"Well, we'll have to get Zell for giving you bad dreams, won't we?" Seifer continued walking toward the dormitory with Ally in his arm.

"Yep, yep," she giggled again, "Fire!"

"No, no fire, that's mean. He'll pee the bed and that's bad," the blond patted the girl's nose with his index finger. "We'll just take his Esunas, hide his Elixirs and Remedies then cast blind on him. Then, he can't play his video games." Seifer opened the door to his own dorm room and set his Hyperion down on a chair then put Ally down. He removed his trench coat and set it on the chair over his weapon. He took Ally's hand, "Let's go say 'hi' to Zell, shall we?"

Ally nodded, her long, dark hair shaking around as she did so. They left the room together and headed down the hallway to Zell's room. Seifer knocked on the door once then turned the knob and opened the door slightly. He peered inside and saw the most unwanted image.

Without turning his head away he spoke quietly, "Ally, go back to my room. I'll be there in a few minutes."

Without complaint she let go of Seifer's hand and trotted down the hallway back to Seifer's room. Seifer opened the door a little more, went inside then closed it shut, being careful not make much sound. Before him, he watched his lover be fucked mindlessly by another person. Both of their eyes were closed tightly. He cleared his throat loudly. Two faces turned to Seifer. One face was of pure surprise. Another had an evil smirk across his lips.

"Having fun?" Seifer asked trying not to let his voice crack.

"Yes, as a matter of fact," the smirking boy replied followed by two more thrusts into the blond boy beneath him.

"Seifer!" Zell exclaimed in pure surprise. He made no gesture to get up from his current position.

Seifer trudged forward and grabbed the body of the boy who just fucked his most prized possession. He jerked the boy off of the bed and threw him to the floor. Pure anger now ran through Seifer's veins. This was definitely not a one-sided consent of sex. He glared at the naked body that lay on the floor.

"GET THE FUCK OUT BEFORE I FUCKING FORCE YOU OUT, IRVINE," Seifer yelled, not caring who heard him outside the door.

Irvine scrambled to his feet and hurriedly pulled his pants on then grabbed his shirt and jacket and left. Seifer turned back to Zell who still lay nude on his bed.

"Seifer, I . . . I . . . ," the younger blond tried to spit out the words of apology.

Seifer just shook his head, "Yeah, I loved you, too." Seifer quickly left the dark room, slamming the door behind him. He made his way back to his dorm room. He entered and slammed that door shut as well. Seifer noticed Ally jump at the loud bang.

The blond just looked away from her and trudged over to his bed. He crawled on top of the blankets. Lying face down, he hugged his pillow to him as he began to silently cry is anger out. He heard Ally get off her bed and onto his.

"You, okay, Seifer?" She stroked his head like he had done to her many times as she cried.

Seifer shook his head in a negative response. He hugged the pillow closer to him and started to sob. It'd been a long time since he'd last cried. The last time was when his parents made him live in Matron's orphanage. That was more than seventeen years ago, when he was three. Ally leaned down and kissed Seifer's cheek, hoping to calm him. That didn't happen until he fell asleep, his face drowning in dried tears.

****

"Seifer! Wake up! Wake up!" Ally called as she shook him out of the dreamworld.

His dreams hadn't been pleasant that night. Images of Zell being taken by Irvine kept playing over and over. He had trusted Zell. Seifer would have gladly died for Zell. He thought there was so much love between them. He certainly never thought this would have happened. Seifer had only been gone for two weeks. It never occurred to him that Zell could get horny enough to not be able to wait to be fucked by the person who loved him most.

Seifer limply pushed himself off the bed and turned to Ally, "What is it, sweetheart?"

"There's sum buddy here to see you," she said and opened the room's door.

Zell walked in with a sad puppy dog look on his face. Ally left the room. She was smart for a six-year-old. Zell faced Seifer and Seifer looked up but he couldn't meet Zell's eyes. The eyes that he used to be able to stare into for hours on end, now no longer were an interest. Seifer stood up from the bed and removed a new day's clothes from the drawers. He dressed as he listened to Zell.

"I'm sorry, Seifer. Things got carried away between me and Irvine. I wish it never happened. I truly do," Zell pleaded.

"Yeah, the same way I wish I had never fallen as hard as I did for you," Seifer grabbed his trench coat and headed out of the room. Zell followed closely behind.

"Come on, Seifer. Can't you forgive me?! It was an honest mistake. I'll never do it again, I swear."

Seifer turned around swiftly on his heels, "No, I can't forgive you. You've fucking ruined everything. I was so fucking happy to be returning home to you and what do I find but you getting your brains fucked out by Irvine?! Don't even start to tell me you're sorry because I know you're not!"

"You're right. I'm not sorry. I had fun with Irvine. But I could never have with Irvine what I have with you."

"Don't you mean what you had with me?! You really should have thought about that before you let Irvine ram his damned cock into your fucking ass," Seifer really didn't mean to be so obscene especially with the junior students around but he couldn't help it.

Seifer turned again and began walking toward the main hall. He noticed Ally sitting on the wall playing her Game Boy. Seifer picked her up and took her out of the Garden with him.

"Where are we going?" Ally's face was full of concern.

"Away, there's no use in being here anymore."

"Seifer!" Zell's voice rang against the clouds.

Ally reached over Seifer's shoulder toward Zell. She didn't know what was happening, it was all happening too fast. She was too young to understand. Seifer brought Ally's arms down. He no longer even wanted to know that Zell existed in this world. His world that had shattered to pieces in less than 24 hours.

Before they reached the city of Balamb, the clouds gave way and sent rain pouring down upon their heads. Seifer held tight to Ally and made a run for the Inn.

"One room, please," Seifer requested as he and Ally entered the almost empty lobby of the Inn. The lady nodded and handed him a key.

Seifer took the key then headed upstairs with Ally still in his arm. He set her down as he entered the room. This was going to be their place to stay until he could find a permanent home for them away from the Garden.

****

"Seifer! Wake up!" Ally called.

He just grunted. His dreams were yet again filled with Zell. His smiling face that taunted Seifer. This definitely wasn't the way to live but he couldn't get over Zell. So much love, so much care was given to the boy who just threw it all away.

It had been nearly two weeks now of depression. Seifer was barely able to get out of bed now-a-days. He opened his eyes and saw Ally in front of him. They had finally moved to Winhill. They lived where Laguna used to stay while he was recovering from his injuries after jumping of the cliff.

"You okay, Seifer?"

Seifer shook his head, "I feel like crap." He tried to smile at her, it seemed that it took most of his strength. He couldn't go on like this. It just wasn't right.

Thoughts of Zell always played in his head but he just couldn't forgive what the boy had done. Every time he saw Ally, a memory of him taking care of her would play in his mind. He would remember watching them play video games together. Every time Seifer would close his eyes, he would see Zell's face. He would see Zell in tears, longing for Seifer to come back to him.

He sat up and hung his legs over the side of his bed. "Hey Ally, could you get me the phone?"

She nodded and headed downstairs. Seifer reached over to the bedside table and opened the drawer he pulled out a piece of paper and a pen. Ally brought him the phone then left the room to go play with the kids outside. Seifer dialed the number of the Garden.

"Hey Quistis, yeah . . . could I speak with Zell?"

"Yeah, hold on a second."

In no time, Zell was on the other end of the phone. "Seifer?! What the hell are you calling for? If it's to get me to come back to you then it's too late. I've already moved on. Turns out Irvine and I can have what you and I had. But if it's not that then keep talking."

Seifer tried to not let his voice crack, "I need you to come pick up Ally. I can't take care of her anymore. I think I've gotten sick or something. I'm scared she will catch it and you're the only one I can leave her with. I'm in Winhill, Laguna's old place."

"Yeah, sure. Fine. When do you want me to get her?"

"As soon as possible."

****

"Seifer! Seifer! Seifer?" Ally knelt down, "This isn't the place to sleep. Seifer?" she shook his body. He didn't wake. A single tear crept down her cheek. "Seifer?"

There was a long slash mark across the front of his bare chest. Blood was seeping out of his wound and flooded underneath the kitchen table all because of the one Death spell that Seifer continuously carried with him. Ally traced the wound with her finger.

"Seifer? No, no. Seifer wake up, please?" he didn't budge. Slowly Ally realized what had happened. "Seifer, no. I didn't mean to cause trouble, I'm sorry. Just come back to me. I promise I be a good girl from now on." Ally started to cry. The only father she had ever really known was now gone with no chance of him returning. She hugged his body and stroked his head as she rocked him back and forth.

"Seifer?!" Ally looked up and saw Zell standing in the open doorway. Ally ran to Zell and hugged him around the waist tightly. She sobbed into his shirt. "What's wrong?" Zell's voice caught in his throat as he noticed Seifer's lifeless body lying on the kitchen floor.

Zell approached the body. He noticed an enveloped letter on the table addressed to him. The blond grabbed it and jammed it into his pocket. He dropped to his knees beside Seifer. He held the body in his arms and kissed the oh-so-cold lips of his ex-lover. It was too late to cast Life to him. All that was left now was the feeling of guilt that resided throughout Zell's body. "I'm sorry, Seifer. I didn't mean to. I still love you." Zell broke down in tears as he held Seifer tight to him.

There was a knock on the door. Irvine had joined the party. "I thought you said it was only going to take five . . . oh." Irvine took hold of the scene then laughed, "Damned bastard deserved it. Oh well, now I have no further worries of him taking you from me."

"Shut up, Irvine. You were always a bastard to Seifer so just respect him now, please?"

Zell took Seifer's body in his arms and stood up. He stalked past Irvine with Ally at his side. Zell couldn't hold back the tears in his eyes even though he tried as hard as he could to do so. He led the way to the flower shop down the road. Zell pounded on the locked door, soon the old woman opened the door and gasped at what she saw. She called her husband down.

****

Zell knelt beside Seifer's new grave. He was buried just out side of Winhill in the middle of nowhere. It was some place that Zell could never forget. It was the cliff that meant so much to both of them. It was the cliff that they both found each other. Zell felt the envelope he had jammed into his pocket earlier. He reached in and pulled it out . . .

Dear Zell,

I'm sorry but I had to. Please try and explain this to Ally. She's too young to understand. I couldn't get you out of my head. This was the only way I knew of to get out of the life I was leading. I missed you too much and I knew I couldn't have you back. Thank you for taking Ally, I know she'll be safe with you. I hope everything works out between you and Irvine. I'll be waiting here for you when the time comes. May angels lead you in . . .

Love always and forever,

Seifer

****

Zell cried himself to sleep every night for the next six months.

I would know, I was there.

~OWARI