Chapter Three

The Happiness Conspiracy

Fujin took a shower and wandered down to the cafeteria/bar and ordered a few beers to drown away her sorrows.

Rinoa, Zell and Squall were only a few feet away at another table having their drinks and Zell inhaling one of the hot-dogs that were oh-so rare. Squall was dazing off into space and absent-mindedly drinking a Shirley Temple (he wasn't a big drinker) when Rinoa caught sight of Fujin and whispered her concerns to her two companions.

"It's so sad. Fujin is really a sweet girl and all these problems being dumped on her is unfair. I think we need to do something to cheer her up."

Zell took a bite from his hot-dog and snickered, "Just kill a baby in front of her. That'll brighten her day by leaps and bounds." Rinoa's swift jab into Zell's side told him that wasn't funny.

"C'mon Squall!" Rinoa whined. "Help me with Fujin."

Squall looked up from his beverage and scowled. "Not a chance in hell."

"Pleeeeease?"

"No."

"SQUALL!!!"

He cringed slightly at the force behind her words and mumbled something under his breath.

"What was that, Mr.?"

He grumbled angrily under his breath. "Nothing."

Rinoa got up and Squall followed in suit. Zell laughed and pointed at Squall but was smacked upside his head by Rinoa and dragged along for the ride.

The three of them walked up to the side of Fujin's table, Rinoa smiled and leaned over while Squall watched and Zell nudged Squall with his elbow and whispered, "Man, Rinoa's got you so whipped!"

"Hi Fujin!"

Fujin looked up from her reflection in her drink and frowned even deeper at Rinoa's smiling face. "GREETINGS."

"Somethin' wrong?" said Rinoa in a very childish voice.

"NEGATIVE."

"You wouldn't be here alone if nothing was wrong!" She pouted.

"RAGE!"

Rinoa squeaked and scurried back to the table with Squall and Zell close behind, shaking their heads. She sat back down and frowned.

"Well that went really well," mocked Squall. Rinoa gave him a sharp glare that promptly shut him up.

Zell looked at Fujin's blue-shirted back and smiled again, "I'm tellin' ya, just bring one of the lower-class students in here, sacrifice them all vampire-style and Fujin will be grinning from ear-to-ear!" This time Squall smacked Zell upside his head and he took another large bite of his hot-dog to stop himself from retaliating and getting his ass kicked.

Ma Dincht had taught him that little pearl of anger-management back when he was just chibi Zell.

Rinoa quickly looked up from her glass and became her normal perky self once again. "I know! We gotta get Raijin and Seifer in here! They must have argued about something and that's why she's so upset!"

"Yeah, well you go do that and we'll stay back here and make sure she finishes her slider," said Squall turning away from watching one of the cafeteria workers smack something with a spatula. Last week it was a four-inch cockroach that hissed. He hoped this time whatever was crawling around in there didn't find its way into the meatloaf again.

"You're both coming with me," she said rising from her seat.

"Damnit woman! Why can't you leave me be?!" Yelled Squall, which was totally unlike him, of course Rinoa, only smiled wider and once again dragged them out the door by their forearms.

Zell struggled to keep up with Rinoa's pace and groaned. "Smooth move, Squall."

"Shut up, Zell."

"Hey she's your girlfriend."

"I said shut up, Zell!"

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Seifer and Raijin had left the Garden and were now at Balamb City at the local Chinese restaurant eating pork fried rice, egg rolls and chow mien at 10:34 a.m.

"So," mused Raijin with a mouth full of oriental cooking. "What was it like at the end, ya know? Back in Ultimecia's castle in compressed time?"

Seifer groaned and slugged back a shot glass of sake. "I don't want to talk about it."

"Oh c'mon! It couldn't have been that bad, ya know?"

"Of course not, being blown through crushing time, being turned inside-out twelve times and thrown back into the present felt fucking wonderful, not to mention just before that Fujin bit my head off."

"You deserved that one though, ya know?"

Seifer lightly chuckled, "Yeah, I know." Seifer pored some more sake into his glass and threw that back just as fast as before. "But I don't want to think about that right now. Tell me what happened after the battle."

"You mean when Squall and the other guys beat Ultimecia?"

"Yeah, do I have too write it down for you?"

Raijin seemed completely oblivious to Seifer's rude comment (maybe because he said things like that to him so often he went deaf to insults) and rolled into peaceful reflection of the weeks past events. "Well, I wasn't there but when they got back here a huge all-night party was thrown. It was great, ya know? Selphie is the funniest drunk you'll ever see."

Seifer laughed and leaned back in his chair. "Describe it."

Raijin burst into hysterics and slapped his knee at the memories. "Oh man it was classic! She was stumbling all over the place and hitting on students left and right! Half way through she downed two whisky's, put a lampshade on her head and led the entire school to do the Macarena."

Raijin whipped a tear from his eye while Seifer was busting up just as much. "I wish I had taken a camcorder, ya know?"

Seifer pored himself some more sake and stared into the liquid, swirling it around like he was expecting his reflected image to change into something or someone else. "Did you and Fujin enjoy yourselves?"

Raijin sighed and fumbled with his staff, which he had laying across his lap. "Fujin didn't do much, ya know? After we got back to Garden from Lunatic Pandora she had changed completely. She hasn't talked much sense then and really hasn't done anything but drink and sleep. Seifer, man, I love you like a brother but Fujin is the closest thing I have to family, ya know?! And what you did to her back at LP was cruel and unforgivable..." A moment of silence rolled by before Raijin finished. "And truthfully I don't know if she'll ever forgive ya for it."

Seifer nodded slowly and drank down his glass again. "I know I screwed up big time. I don't know what the fuck was going through my head when I decided to become the Matron's knight but if I could take it back, Hyne's grace man, I would. I've lost so much and haven't gained shit."


"But you can't go back, Seifer, your just going to have to make the future better, ya know? I forgive you just because I know it wasn't your fault but your gonna have to apologize to Fujin with some serious soul, ya know?"

Seifer groaned but nodded in agreement. Damnit! I hate when people are so goddamn right! Fuck! Fuck fuckity fuck fuck fuck!!!

As you may guess, Seifer wasn't the best at apologies, hell he hadn't even batted an eyelash when he nearly sliced Squall's eye right out of his skull. Hey...wait, that's strange. Seifer had a scar along his eye, Squall had gotten his from Hyperion and Fujin had lost vision in her eye too some serious accidents on Seifer's part...coincidence? I think not.

"Then I'll apologize to her," he reasoned, "but Fujin wouldn't listen unless I truly meant it and the only time I'm ever serious about anything is when I'm on a mission! C'mon Raijin! Were going to Cid to reapply for mercenary work."

Seifer threw a fifty-gil piece on the table and left without bothering to wait for the check. It seemed customary for members of the posse just too guess how much it cost and estimate how much you felt like paying. Raijin picked up his staff and followed Seifer out the door.

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Rinoa along with Squall and Zell who were both quite fed up with being ordered around by now were searching every section of the Garden and even went as far as announcing Seifer and Raijin over the intercom but neither of them responded and Rinoa's quest for Fujin's happiness was soon getting on her nerves.

"Where could they be! Where do they have to go?! This is important to Fujin and I, damnit! How can they leave at a time like this, damnit?!" Rinoa was pacing back-and-forth in the quad so fast it looked like she was going to wear a groove in the floor.

"Rinoa, calm down, your caring about this way to much," Squall said generally concerned as he nodded a greeting to the Diamond Twin's as they walked by talking about a recent Triple Triad battle they had kicked ass in.

"Is it so wrong to care about someone's tranquility?! DAMNIT!!!"

"Stop shouting. I'm sure Seifer and Raijin will be back soon from where ever they went. You know they never go to far without Fujin and will come back for her."

Zell was leaning on the guard rail a few feet away grinning and watching the Diamond Twin's backsides as they walked away, shaking hypnotically.

"Zell! Do you have any idea where they could have gone too?" Asked Rinoa inquisitively.

Zell didn't hear a word and watched the Diamond Twin's disappear from view, and frowned in disappointment.

"ZELL!!!"

"AH!! WHAT?! WHERE?!!" he shouted nearly jumping off his feet. The tattoo along his eye seemed to ripple in startled fear just like its owner did.

"Do you know where Seifer and Raijin may have gone too?" she asked again growing impatient.

Zell slouched and clasped his hand over his heart. "How the fuck should I know?! Are you trying to give me a fucking stroke?!!"

Rinoa seemed hurt by his return outburst and crossed her arms over her breast and leaned against the information panel of the lobby.

Squall groaned. He knew he was going to have to console her later about this one. "Zell, you didn't have to shout."

"Well I'm sorry but I nearly jumped out of my skin!" Zell straightened himself and looked back to the corner where the two identical young ladies passed through. He didn't see the Diamond Twin's but Fujin was stomping around the turn looking very vexed.

"Oh crap! I'm outta here!" Shouted Zell as he started to walk up to the elevator but was stopped by Squall grabbing his shirt collar.

Fujin stopped next to Rinoa who looked a bit happier now, of course it was hard to ever keep her angry for any lengthy amount of time.

"What the hell were you idiots screaming over the intercom?!" Fujin was seething with anger.

Rinoa probably imagined Fujin happily floating down the steps wearing a bridal gown because she didn't seem put-off by her angry demeanor and smiled with all the naiveness a young girl like herself could muster. "Fujin! So glad you could join us! Wanna go play some miniature golf?"

"NEGATIVE!!!"

This time Rinoa was put back a bit and nodded to Squall like she expected him to say something to improve this drastically declining conversation. Not that it had ever been up, though.

Squall desperately searched for words but it was no secret he was usually lacking in conversational tactics, especially to girls most of the time. Hell, the only reason Rinoa was so attracted to him is because she could see a rugged charm and cowboy-like chivalry buried deep beneath Squall's rock-hard exterior. Selphie and Quistis had both asked her repeatedly just what she saw in him and she rattled off a hundred of Squall's best qualities, but in the end she summed it up with, "He's sweet." This especially caught off Quistis who had been repeatedly blown off by him but felt safe around him and thought he was somewhat of a serious class clown. Selphie, on the other hand, had liked Squall the minute she ran into him that day in the Garden's second floor hallway.

He was kind enough to give her a quick tour of the Garden but pretty much ignored her the rest of the time. But somewhere deep down inside her childish style and beautiful demeanor made Squall feel somewhat responsible for her. Almost like a father. The only other time on record he could remember the slightest hint of a smile was during her song on the train that day.

Man, Selphie has to be wandering around here somewhere, I wish she would loop around that corner like she always does and put Fujin at ease so I don't look like a total ass.

But he was still standing there, Fujin was still looking angry and Selphie hadn't come around yet so he did the only thing he could think of at the time. "Train, train, take us away, take us far, far away..."

Fujin instantly dropped her serious expression and gained a sad, motherly look. Rinoa was blushing and quickly thinking about getting Squall back to her room and ask just what the hell he had just sung and Zell had a vacant look on his face but instantly burst into explosive laughter.

"Dude! You just sang Selphie's train song! Oh Christ, Irvine is gonna laugh himself dead!!!"

"I couldn't think of anything else!"

"CONFUSED," murmured Fujin and she started walking forward toward the exit just as Seifer and Raijin shot through the gates and greeted her with a quick "yo!" before bolting past everyone and too the elevator, no doubt to Cid's office.

Fujin shook her head and followed after them while Rinoa and Zell grinned at Squall who threw up his hands and sat down in defeat. "Ah, the hell with it all!"