Chapter IV: Riddles and Doors
"There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, then are dreamt of in your philosophy."
- William Shakespeare, "Hamlet "
Lyra and Serafina decided to wait with their journey until the next day. They then took a Gyptian boat throughout The Fens. Lord Faa himself had personally seen to it that his two friends could travel as fast and safe as possible. "For Lyra, anything," he said. "I would gladly mobilise every Gyptian vessel in The Fens if it would help her."
Serafina had thanked him, but also let him know that one fast ship was enough.
Travelling through The Fens was not as exciting as last time, since Lyra had seen way too much since then to be impressed. It was, however, nice with a change of scenery. Serafina stayed with her the entire time, even though Lyra could notice that she would much rather fly. Lord Faa had assured them of Lyra's safety, but the witch still felt that she would stay with her young friend. It was most likely because of the hug, but Lyra didn't understand that.
After arriving at the Germanic Sea they soon reached Swecia and got of at Kalmar. Lord Faa had tried to get them on a ship that would take them all the way to Trollesund, like last time, but both Lyra and Serafina had assured him that he had already done enough.
From Kalmar they travelled from city to city by train, constantly switching. At first Lyra found the trains more interesting then the boat, but soon she realised there was little real fun to the whole locomotive-idea. Serafina disliked it even more, but held a brave face throughout the journey. Finally Lyra found herself spending allot of her time looking out the train windows. Anyone who has ever travelled by train knows how the shifting panorama outside effects ones mind, and Lyra soon found herself thinking about things she didn't know she had inside her head. But mostly she thought about Will, and his hair and lips and hands and smile…
Then again, she thought, he must have changed allot during the past two years. She tried to picture herself Will at the age of fourteen. He must be taller, and probably a bit broader across the shoulders. Perhaps he had another hairdo then the one she remembered? Her memory of the dream was a little hazy, but she decided that unless he had gone through a massive change of personality, which she found unlikely, she would still love him.
Finally they had reached Lapland and travelled so far up north that they had to hire a dogsleigh. They didn't need a guide, though, since Serafina had been to the area before.
Lyra found that the dogs were almost supernaturally obedient and intelligent, and she had soon mastered manoeuvring the sleigh as Serafina flew at low altitude nearby.
"Where are we going?" she shouted as they raced across the beautiful frozen highlands.
"To Mount Kyopela," Serafina responded and pointed ahead of them. "Where Renska the Elder lives!"
Lyra had all but forgotten about the harsh and untamed beauty in the northern regions. Now she only needed Iorek by her side and she would be unstoppable. She looked up and noticed a steep, dark grey mountain rising in front of them like an evil finger. She realised that she had never been this close to finding some real answers. She only hoped that Serafina's hopes in the ancient witch were justified.
Luckily, Lyra didn't need to actually climb to the cave were Renska the Elder dwelled. Serafina gave her a lift on the cloud pine branch, which quickly elevated them to the cave.
"Listen to me, Lyra," Serafina said when they landed. "This woman is older then anyone can remember and her powers and wisdom are as vast as the sky. She is one of the few beings in this world that I truly fear. When you stand in front of her you must speak the truth, mind your feelings and not be afraid. Do you understand?"
Lyra nodded and they both entered the cave together. Inside they saw a small fire, probably only to shed light rather then to spread any heat. Strange markings had been painted on the walls and the eerie light from the fire made shadowy figures dance around them. A dusty and seemingly very dead old skin from some animal lay in front of them one the stone floor. When they came closer it suddenly got up with frightening speed and glared at them with flaming, almost insane eyes. Lyra's heart almost jumped out of her chest until she realised what the monstrosity really was; a giant wolverine, apparently as old as the mountain itself. The fur had once been brown but now had an uncertain grey shade. The claws and teeth were enormous and it looked thin and famished, yet powerful. She had never seen a more frightening appearance, even at Svalbard, where her friend Iorek Byrnisson had fought the bear-king Iofur Raknisson. Pantalaimon immediately hid behind Lyra's legs and even Kaisa took a nervous step back.
"State your intent!" the wolverine dæmon growled.
"There now, Maattiaiset," a voice from the fire said. "Let the children come to my fire. I have waited for them."
Maattiaiset gave them a last malignant glare before slipping away into the shadows, undoubtedly to some place were he could watch them without being watched.
Lyra and Serafina approached the fire, and Lyra could now see the person sitting by it.
Renska the Elder probably were the oldest creature Lyra had ever seen, with the exception of the Authority, the ancient angel that had died before her eyes two years ago. Her face was wrinkled, but she could see the great beauty the woman once must have possessed underneath. The long hair was white as snow and braided with colourful pearls of glass and feathers. A tick fur hung loosely over her shoulders, and underneath she was dressed in the same black velvet clothing as Serafina, although much older and more torn. But what really made her look old, and what really caught Lyra completely off guard, were her eyes.
When Lyra looked into Serafina's eyes she was met with wisdom and kindness in so great amounts that she felt awed. But Renska's eyes were deep pools of ancient knowledge that threatened to devour her. Two completely round spots of darkness, surrounded by ivory-white and seemingly only coloured by the reflecting flames of the fire. These were the kind of eyes that saw everything, and Lyra had an unpleasant feeling that she might fall into those eyes and never return. It was, Lyra suddenly realised, very much like looking into the monstrous Abyss outside the worlds, which Lyra and Will had encountered on their journey through the realm of death.
"So, you are Lyra?" the age-old witch asked and smiled. Her voice was like the sound of a tree being ripped up by the roots by the wind. Lyra had expected the old woman to be lacking at least some teeth, but they were not only all accounted for, they were also in a remarkably well-preserved state, gleaming like polished alabaster. "The winds have whispered about you, child, and the fire has been singing. You have made us all a great favour. Tell me, young Eve, what bring you to my simple cave."
"I…" Lyra stuttered. "I came to ask for your help."
"Ah," Renska said and smiled even wider. "You have lost something, yes? Or perhaps someone? I see through you, child, and I see a broken heart. For broken hearts there is no cure."
"I am not looking for a cure," Lyra said. "Only release. I need to find the House of Doors."
Renska looked at her without speaking for a short while. "Do you fully understand what you are looking for? Can you comprehend what you might be getting yourself into if I give you the answer?"
"So you have the answer!" Lyra said, a little louder then she intended. Her heart was racing.
"Do you understand?" Renska asked again and her eyes seemed to be looking straight into Lyra's soul.
"No," Lyra said truthfully. "I don't know what I'm getting myself into, but I do know that it cannot possibly be worse then what I've already been through. I mean, I've experienced death, for crying out loud!"
"Yes, I suppose so," Renska said. "Very well then."
She took a small leather pouch from within her clothing and opened it. Then she carefully poured a thin stream of green powder into the palm of her hand, which she then threw into the fire. There was a loud puff, and the flames turned green for a short while. A strange, green smoke arose from the fire. Lyra thought that it smelled both refreshing and intoxicating, helping her to think clearer. Renska quickly inhaled allot of the smoke and closed her eyes. Her eyelids started to vibrate as if she had some kind of reaction, and Lyra was afraid that the witch had accidentally happened to poison herself. But then those terrible eyes snapped open and stared at her.
"You must return to the place you came from," Renska said with a strange voice, as if she was in some kind of trance. "There you must look… for the one carrying the symbol of the Roads! She will show you the way… to the House of a Thousand Doors!" You must… go alone. Serafina Pekkala must not go with you. Find someone to guide you. Do not walk… the roads without the Guide! Then follow the Road that leads… to your beloved's world."
A dozen questions whirled in Lyra's mind. How did the symbol of the Roads look like? Was this person at St. Sophia, or just in Oxford in general? But Renska seemed to wake up from the trance and Lyra realised that the time of questions and answers was over.
"I cannot tell you more, Lyra," Renska said. "Serafina Pekkala, take her back and prepare her. She will need all help you can provide on her coming journey."
Serafina nodded. "I will do so, Elder." She took Lyra's hand. "Come, Lyra. Now we must leave."
Lyra nodded, still having troubles breaching eye contact with Renska. The witch and the girl made a hasty exit. Renska looked at them as they left and smiled. Maattiaiset appeared from the shadows and sat down next to her.
"You did not tell them everything," the wolverine said and looked at his human. "About the House, about the boy she seeks."
"They do not want to know everything," Renska answered. "Things tend to get very complicated when people know everything. They always try to change Destiny. It is better to let things happen the way they are meant to happen."
Maattiaiset nodded. Renska chuckled a little to herself. "Good luck, young Lyra. You -and your beloved- will need it soon enough."
Twelve days later…
Immediately after returning from her trip to Lapland Lyra began scouring St. Sophia for a girl or woman wearing the sign of the Roads. She didn't know what kind of mark it would be or how it would look like, but she suspected it to be either a birthmark or a tattoo and felt confident that she would recognise it the moment she saw it.
For three days she sought it. She asked all the academics and kept her eyes open for just about anything that even reminded her about roads. She questioned her friends at the school if they knew of anyone wearing such a mark, and she even sought it among the servants. But the search was in vain.
"What am I doing wrong?" Lyra asked Pantalaimon as she sat down on the stairs to St. Sophia and put her chin in her hands. "I can't find the one with the symbol!"
"Renska never said it would be easy," Pan said. "Don't worry, it will all turn out fine."
"How?" Lyra asked.
"I don't know," Pan admitted. "It's a mystery."
"Oh, it's no use," Lyra said and put her face in her hand, sobbing silently. "I'll never find that symbol."
"That's what you said last time," Pan reminded her. "You have to keep trying."
"I know, Pan, I know," Lyra said. "I'm just so very tired of this."
"Hello Lyra. How are you?"
Lyra looked up and saw a girl, around twelve years, with straight brown hair and warm, sincere eyes. A dæmon in the form of a squirrel was sitting on the top of her head. Lyra tried to remember her name. "Oh, hello Dora."
"You look sad," Dora Portia said. "Is there anything I can do for you?"
"I'm alright, Dora," Lyra said. "It's just that I've been looking for something, but I haven't been able to find it."
"I could help you look for it!" Dora said and smiled. "Mrs van Helsen says I have a talent for finding things."
Lyra smiled. The girl reminded her about herself before she left Jordan on her quest for the enigma of Dust. It felt like an eternity ago. As Lyra looked at her, she noticed that Dora was wearing a peculiar medallion around her neck. It looked a bit like a wheel made out of brazen.
"What's that?" Lyra asked and pointed.
"What? Oh, this?" Dora said. "It's a medallion my father brought home from one of his travels in the East." Dora's eyes became dim for a moment, and Lyra felt pity for her. Like herself, Dora was now an orphan. "It symbolises that Wheel of Eight Roads, and is an important symbol in the Bhuddai religion…"
"What did you say it was called?" Lyra's attention was suddenly focused on the other girl and her medallion.
"The Wheel of Eight Roads," Dora repeated. "Why? Lyra, why are you staring at me like that?"
"It's you!" Lyra said. "Pan, it's her we've been looking for!"
"I told you it all turn out fine," Pan said.
"What are you talking about?" Dora asked. "Why have you been looking for me?"
"A witch told us that you were the only one who could help us," Lyra said, trying not to rush her explanation. "Dora, I don't know if you understand any of this, but we need to find the House of Doors!"
Dora's eyes grew large and round as she stared at Lyra. She shook her head. "How… how do you know about the House?"
"The alethiometre told us that it was the only way to find… someone," Lyra hurried to explain. "If you know where it is I would be really, really glad if you could tell me how to find it."
"It's not that simple," Dora said. "First of all, the House isn't exactly a place you can go to! I don't think it exists in that way."
"What do you mean?" Lyra asked.
Dora searched for the correct words. "The House is everywhere, and any door can become one of the Doors in the House. But it takes a special kind of person to open it."
"Are you such a person?" Lyra asked.
Dora hesitated. "Well, yeah, sorta."
"Sorta?"
"Okay, I am."
"Then you must open a Door for me!" Lyra said. "It's my only chance!"
"Oh no!" Dora said and backed off, shaking her head. "Nonononono! Not a chance!"
"But why not?" Lyra asked. "If you have the gift why not use it?"
"It's not a gift, it's a curse!" Dora said. "I'm sorry, Lyra. I… I can't do it."
"But why?"
"It took my mother! Okay?" Dora shouted. "I… I'm afraid that it will take me as well."
"Took your… mother?" Lyra said. "Dora, what do you mean?"
Dora sighed. "I guess it runs in the family. My mother could also enter the House, you see. She was the one who told me how to do it, but she also told me never to do it on my own. My father didn't like the idea of travelling throughout the House of a Thousand Doors. Rather ironic, since he was the great sailor and world traveller. My mother and I used to use the House to travel all around the world to meet him. It was an easy way to travel, in through one door and out through another. My father was happy about it, of course, but I think it spooked him a bit." Dora's eyes were filled with tears as she continued her story. "Then, one day, she went into the House and never returned. I don't know what happened. We waited for a long, long time, my father and me. I wanted to go look for her, but my father wouldn't let me. He said he couldn't bear to loose us both. Finally we had to accept that we would never see her again. My father died in a shipwreck some time after that, and I was left all alone."
Lyra felt incredibly moved by the story. She put her hand to her cheeks and found that they were wet with tears.
"So you see," Dora said. "I do have my reasons to fear the House. I never want to open another one of those doors ever again."
"Oh, Dora," Lyra said. "I'm so terribly sorry. I have also lost someone I love, you see."
"You have?" Dora asked. "Tell me."
She sat down next to Lyra who started to tell her the whole story, about the Dust, about her father, Lord Asriel. About Bolvangar and the terrible experiments conducted there. About Iorek and the other armoured bears, and about Serafina Pekkala and her witch-sisters. She told her about how she left her own world and meet Will, how they came to know and love each other, how they struggled trough war and death, and finally how they were forced to leave each other. When she was finished, Dora was crying even more then Lyra had been, since Lyra was good at telling stories even if they were true.
"That was the most wonderful story I have ever heard," Dora said. "And now you want to travel the House of Doors? To find Will's world?"
"Yes," Lyra answered. "I can't go on like this, I must see him again."
"But even if you do, you wouldn't be able to find the way back again," Dora said. "You would die within ten years!"
"There must be people who can open the Doors in Will's world too," Lyra said. "Ten years is a long time, we are sure to find one if we look hard enough. In any case, I don't care. All I ask of you is to open the Door. After that I can handle myself."
Dora nodded. "I guess I could open a Door for you, but it is dangerous in the House. You might never return, like my mother."
"That is a chance I will have to take," Lyra said sternly.
"Love really must be something if you would put yourself at risk for it like that," Dora said and smiled.
"It is," Lyra nodded. "It really is."
Later, Lyra had everything prepared. Dora had wanted her that there was nothing to eat in the House, so she had packed a bag full of food that she hoped would be enough. She also had her alethiometre with her, even though she didn't know what to do with it. She just felt comfortable knowing she had it with her. When inside the House she would find the Guide Renska had been talking about and convince him or her to lead her to Will's world. Even thought she was taking an enormous chance she felt confident that she would succeed.
When all preparation were finished Serafina, Dora and herself had retreated to a conveniently empty room at St. Sophia.
"This door will do fine," Dora said and nodded at the door to the hallway. "Any door can become an opening to the House of Doors."
"Lyra, before you go I have something for you," Serafina said. "I am not allowed to accompany you this time, but maybe these gifts can provide some help." She handed Lyra a large, red piece of cloth. Lyra took it and found that it was a cloak, scarlet red with embroided golden runes.
"This cloak is my first gift. It has been in my family for a long while," Serafina said. "Nobody knows exactly what it does, only that it protects its wearer from danger."
"Thank you," Lyra said and put the cloak on. It fitted her perfectly. "It's wonderful."
"My next gift is this," Serafina said and handed her a long dagger in a leather sheet. "It is not as sharp as the Knife, but might prove to be sharp enough."
Lyra pulled the dagger out of the sheet. It was longer then the Knife had been, with a blade of almost three decimetres. It was not metal, but seemed to be made out of polished bone or horn. The edge was truly sharp, though, and strange symbols Lyra couldn't read was carved into the blade. "Thank you again, Serafina," she said and quickly fastened it to her belt. "This might come in handy."
"Ready?" Dora asked.
"Yes," Lyra nodded.
Dora put her hand on the door's handle, and a shudder seemed to go through her body. She quickly removed it again. "I can't do it!"
"You have to!" Lyra cried. "Please, Dora! You're my only hope."
Dora drew a deep breath and put her hand on the handle again. She closed her eyes and concentrated. Then she turned the handle and ripped the door open, immediately retreating back to Lyra and Serafina.
Before them in the door, where they would normally see an ordinary hallway, was a dark portal of shadows and mist. Lyra believed that she could see something inside, but she wasn't really sure what. Strange shapes and lines, moving yet still standing still.
"So that is the House of Doors?" she said.
Dora shook her head. "No, that's just the Door. It looks different on the other side."
Lyra decided not to postpone it any longer. She picket up her bag and walked over to the portal. She lifted her right hand and slowly reached into the shadows. There was no resistance, only a strange cold feeling, like putting your hand through a wall of fog. She looked back at Serafina and Dora.
"Goodbye then," she said. "Till we meet again."
And then, wrapped in Serafina's cloak, she and Pantalaimon took the step through the Door, into the House of a Thousand Doors.
