AN: What better of a place to take a fun vacation than a beach resort nestled in the waves of the ocean? But be careful, seawater and sand can only rust the lock, making it impossible to open ever again. I do not own the aquatic Yu Yu Hakusho characters (picture them with fins, whee!) Please be patient for the last chapter, I've got a sort of writers block. Forgive me now if I misuse or misspell any Japanese. Enjoy the reading.
~Rei
"I had closed the door upon my heart
And wouldn't let anyone in
I had trusted and loved
Only to be hurt
But that would never happen again
I had locked the door and tossed the key
As hard and as far as I could
Love would never enter there again
My heart was closed for good…"
~ First part of Key To My Heart (a poem), author Unknown
Chapter 5: Lock
Hiei glanced over at Miyuki; she still wore the same clothing she had for this morning's sunrise. He thought back to the moment he had wandered so stupidly into the deadly trap. Kurama and Yukina had made a joint effort to lull him into security and had both lured him into the van next to Miyuki in the way back.
And now they were on a trip to the beach.
How could he have been so stupid? The beach?! He could just escape once they got there, either by means of his unworldly speed or by opening a portal to the Makai. But they would most likely be watching him, expecting him to try to get away. So he was trapped. No matter, he would find a way to avoid everyone.
But how could he concentrate on the matter of escape when next to him sat Miyuki, whose scent was so intoxicating? It was driving him crazy. Everyone was so close, she was so close. He just knew they could all hear his heart going doki doki wildly within his chest.
Miyuki looked over at him suddenly. "Did you say something?"
"No," Hiei said. At least, he hadn't thought he said anything. "Why?"
"I thought I heard you say my name," Miyuki said, looking away with embarrassment.
Hiei made a point not to notice her blushing and instead concentrated on what the others were talking about. They were remembering their stay at the Kubikukuri hotel. He remembered that place; he had hated all but one part of it. The beds. They hadn't been the best in the world, but a bed was a bed.
"Well the resort is wonderful," Keiko suddenly interjected. She had been to it a couple of times before with her parents, in fact it was her parents who were paying for the stay they would be having. A whole week in paradise. "Its right on the beach and you can hear the waves at night."
"It sounds beautiful," Yukina said.
"We'll have the whole house to ourselves," Keiko added. "But even so, we should be careful not to wreck anything."
"How many rooms are there?" Kurama asked out of curiosity.
A smile spread across Keiko's features. "There are seven rooms. One of us will get a room to themselves, but the rest of us will have to share."
"I don't think that's too much of a problem," Boton said.
"Miyuki can have the room to herself," Hiei said, everyone turned to look at him, they hadn't expected him to speak.
"Why do you say that?" Boton asked.
Hiei allowed a smirk to appear on his face. He wasn't an idiot; they were trying to force Miyuki upon him. "Its only proper that she doesn't have to share a room with Ko-Enma or I."
"Oh," Boton said softly. Hiei noticed her eyes focusing just past his shoulder, and when he looked back, he found Miyuki gazing silently out the window. He felt a twinge of guilt for talking as if she wasn't even there. He sat back in his seat and crossed his arms over his chest. He wanted to say something to her, but didn't know what or how. The others continued their chatter.
He took a breath to speak, but held it. She wouldn't look over; if she would at least stop looking out the window then he could be somewhat sure that she would hear him. He let his air out in the form of a sigh, unfortunately, this finally caught Miyuki's attention. She looked over at him.
"Are you ok, Hiei?"
"I'm fine," he said. "Why do you care?"
Miyuki looked shocked, then hurt. She closed her mouth and lowered her eyes sadly, "I'm sorry," she mumbled, then turned back towards the window.
Hiei was screaming inside his head. He was such an IDIOT! He hadn't originally meant to be cold, it just happened. Before, when she had been a child, it had been easier for him to let her know his feelings. Part of it was because she needed reassurance every few minutes, the other because of the spirit link. Hiei wished now that the link was back, maybe then he could let her know that he wasn't angry.
A faint flicker of miserable green ghosted through his mind for the briefest moment. Hiei nearly jumped in his seat when he realized it was Miyuki. The colors converged into a distorted, hazy picture of her.
Hiei?
I thought the link was gone.
I – id to. Wh - ing on?
I can't hear you. Hiei concentrated as hard as he could on her form, but the more he tried to focus on it, the more it fazed in and out. Soon there was nothing more than a flicker.
Suddenly, a picture made its way brightly through. It looked like an old lock. A lock? Why would Miyuki send him a picture of a lock? Then every trace of her was gone and he was left alone in his mind.
Beside him Miyuki sagged against the window for the briefest of moments before she sat up straight again. She looked over at him and their eyes met. Miyuki didn't need to the link to read the question in his mind.
"You should figure it out, Hiei. For yourself." She said softly, before letting her eyes wander out the window once more. It hurt that she had to turn away from him, but she didn't want to let him see her. She must have looked pathetic as she furiously bit her lips hard enough to make a small trickle of blood seep over her tongue, trying not to cry.
***
Miyuki had just finished unpacking (thanks to Keiko and Yukina for thinking to bring along her things since coming to the resort had been a surprise for her) when a knock sounded at her door.
"Come in," she called, setting her bag in the corner of the closet so it was out of the way. When she turned around she was startled to see Kurama standing in the doorway. "Hello, Kurama."
"Hello, Miyuki." He said, sitting down in a chair. Miyuki sat cross-legged on her bed.
"Can I ask why you've come to visit me?" She asked shyly.
"I just wanted to talk," Kurama said.
"… About?" Miyuki didn't mean to sound so rude, but she couldn't help but feel as if perhaps she were being baited.
Kurama gave a slight chuckle, "I see it'll be hard to get anything past you. I wanted to talk about Hiei."
Miyuki flinched mentally at the name. "Why?"
"I heard from someone that you like him?" Kurama said.
"Your very straightforward, Kurama-kun." Miyuki said. "And Boton-chan told you, didn't she?" Kurama gave a laugh and a nod. Miyuki sighed and hugged her pillow, looking helplessly up at the tall Youko. "What if I did like him? Have you come to tell me it'll never work? That he's too cold and cruel?" She buried her face in the softness so her voice was muffled. "I'm afraid I already found that out."
She felt the bed depress and gravity tried pulling her closer to Kurama who had sat down beside her. She flinched slightly as a warm hand rested on her shoulder. "He has his reasons to be so cold."
"And you will not tell me because they are his reasons and not yours." Miyuki sighed and lifted her head to look at Kurama. "I understand. But I just wish that he would let me get at least a little close. It must have taken a long time to get him to trust you and the others, ne?"
Kurama gave a half smile and nodded. "It was, but he came around. Just give it some time."
He watched as Miyuki's face grew sad and distant. She sighed and rested her chin against the pillow still clutched against her chest. When she spoke, her voice was soft and distracted. "Time is something I am afraid I don't have much of."
"Nani?"
Her lips pressed into a thin line and she shook her head. "Never mind."
"Tell me."
"No, Kurama. Forget it."
"I will not," Kurama said sternly. "Tell me what you mean."
Miyuki sighed and gave in, "I can feel something. I'll have to leave the Ningenkai soon and go back."
"Back where?" Kurama pressed. Miyuki turned away, she would say no more on the matter. Kurama sighed and wrapped the frail-seeming girl in a warm hug. She was startled, but returned it, glad to be able to draw comfort from someone. Kurama pulled away and held Miyuki by the shoulders so he could look into her face. "Hiei will come around." With that he stood and sauntered toward the door.
"Thank you, Kurama-kun."
Kurama acknowledged the quite words by looking back and nodding before he shut the door quietly.
Once alone Miyuki sighed, squeezing her eyes tightly shut. She reached out with her mind and felt along the dim link. She had thought it was gone before, but it was still there, just barely, but she could still feel its presence.
This perplexed her. In the past the link had always cut off as soon as she had regained enough energy and the flow stopped between her and the one who had spirit linked. She wasn't sharing energy with Hiei now, which puzzled her even more.
And that brought her to the matter of how fast she had changed. She could not recall exact things that happened to her when she was in her child form, but she did have a hazy memory and, sometimes, an even hazier guess of how long she had spent away from her older body. Not this time, however. She was positive that it had only taken a day and a half.
But how?
Could Hiei's reikai have been that similar to her's? What did it mean? It was most likely all coincidence, but fuzzy details of the past told her other wise. Now as she pondered it out, trying to remember experiences of before, she cursed her existence. What was the purpose for her to be able to remain alive by means of shifting to and from her child form if she could never remember more than a handful of things?
People she didn't know called her friend, even more enemy. Letters addressed to her from strangers thanking her or condemning her for things she never remembered doing.
A sudden thought ran through her mind with an icy warm touch. What if Hiei's reikai was so similar because he would take over her duties?
It wasn't too hard to believe. As times changed (and she guessed that much time had passed her by) so did people and technology. Perhaps they had found a better foul safe plan by means of Hiei. It wouldn't have been so bad. She could live out the life she had now as a normal human being. Of course, being human would mean she would loose most if not all of her reikai and senses. Or maybe she wouldn't be allowed to live this life. She guessed she had lived plenty of lifetimes. Death would be welcome after so much time.
But how much time?!
"I'm going in circles!" She moaned as she flopped back on the bed, smothering her face with the pillow.
She didn't hear the door opening and didn't even realize someone was there until she felt hands tugging at the cushion. She let them pull it away from her face and found Yukina standing beside the bed.
"Hello, Yukina, what brings you here? Come to counsel me about Hiei also?"
Yukina blushed and sat down. "Someone already came to talk with you?"
"Mm," she said in confirmation as she stood and moved to her closet, unwilling to allow Yukina see the sudden wash of exhaustion that seemed to sweep over her. "Kurama."
"Oh," Miyuki looked over her shoulder and saw Yukina stand. She moved over and put a hand on her shoulder. "Well, then he's told you that Hiei - "
"Will come around in time," Miyuki said with her. She couldn't help but smile warmly at the youkai. She felt at ease with Yukina, perhaps it was because she was Hiei's twin, who knew. "Yes, he did. Thank you."
"Of course," Yukina said with a blush, pleased that she had seemed to have been able to pull Miyuki from the dark mood she'd been in since their arrival at the resort. "I also came to tell you that we're all going to go to the beach. Do you want to come with?"
Miyuki gave a moment to think it over. Maybe some bright sunshine would be good for her, and besides, she wanted to spend as much time having fun in the Ningenkai before she would have to make the eminent return to…
"Everyone?"
Yukina smiled and nodded. "Everyone."
Miyuki returned the grin and gave a thumbs-up. "Ok, let me get my things together and I'll be right down."
"We'll be waiting, Miyuki-chan." Yukina said as she walked out the door.
Miyuki began searching through the closet for the bathing suit she knew she had stored within it. When she had found it and her towel along with sunglasses and sunscreen she straightened up and moved to the great window that adorned the larger part of one of the bedroom walls. It faced the ocean, and she watched as the waves lapped idly at the sands.
"Hiei…"
***
"Watch out!"
Hiei swiftly sidestepped the beach volleyball that had been flying at his head. He looked over at Boton, who had shouted the warning. She waved at him as an apology.
"Throw the ball back, will you Miyuki?"
Miyuki?
Hiei turned around when he heard the light sound of dry sand shifting beneath feet. Miyuki was approaching, wearing her red bikini-style bathing suite, her sunglasses propped on her forehead, partially to keep the long silvery strands of hair out of her eyes. She leaned down and picked up the ball, then threw it back to Boton.
"Hey," she said softly, looking at Hiei with azure eyes.
Hiei nodded stiffly, feeling embarrassed wearing the green and yellow, Hawaiian style swim trunks that had been borrowed from Yuusuke. He felt like an idiot. Miyuki shifted awkwardly and gave a shy smile.
"Are you having fun?" She asked in a quite voice.
"Hn," Hiei said.
She was about to say something more, but was interrupted by Keiko.
"Miyuki, come play with us!"
Miyuki looked behind Hiei at the other girls, they waved their arms wildly, motioning for her to play. She didn't really want to but…it would be better than standing awkwardly in front of Hiei waiting for him to "come around." She gave a nod and returned hr focus to Hiei's elven features.
"I guess I'll see you later." She said and waved, moving to walk past him.
She was surprised when she felt him grab her arm secretly. She stopped and was about to turn her head to look at him when she felt his hot breath puffing against her ear as he whispered something to her. Just as quickly he had let go and returned to his normal facade of indifference.
***
Miyuki sat on a rock near a small wake pool. She watched as tiny fish darted around beneath its silvery surface only to soon figure out that they were trapped from the ocean.
Trapped.
That was how she felt.
She didn't know if it had been such a good idea to decide to stay in the Ningenkai now. If any being of considerable power came along, she would be in danger of breaking a law that she herself had created long ago.
Never, ever endanger those around you.
If she was in the Makai she could easily move away from anyone that could be harmed. But in the Ningenkai it would be difficult to find such a place. It seemed humans inhibited every little space. Though she would have Hiei and the others to help her if needed.
Hiei.
She blushed as she recalled his breath as it caressed her cheek. His words echoed in her mind…
"I threw the key away long ago."
He had figured out her cryptic words. It hurt for her to remember when she had realized it herself. Hiei's mind and soul were locked up tight, and indeed the key must have been thrown away. The walls were too high, the lock too old. There was no way for her to get through, and Hiei had confirmed it.
"He'll come around…"
"No he won't." Miyuki said bitterly to herself, throwing a rock into the water and causing violent ripples to disturb the surface.
"Who won't what?"
Miyuki froze, her back stiffening. Her eyes widened and she turned her head ever so slightly to the side. Behind her stood Hiei, of all people. He moved over and sat beside her on the rock. Miyuki blinked over at him until he pinned her with a mild glare. Flustered, she turned her attention back to the fish.
"N-nothing. I was just thinking to myself." She managed to stutter out.
Hiei let his silence answer for him while his mind roared with thoughts. He had thought about what Miyuki had said in the car early that morning. And now as the sun began to set he knew what she had meant by the lock.
Miyuki was trying to tell him that he was the lock. His emotions had been stored carefully away from the daylight and the memories stuffed as best as they could be into the back of his mind where he didn't have to think of them all the time. He wouldn't let anyone in, and he didn't really think he could. When he had still been young the key had been tossed away and lost within the brush of the Makai.
Besides, who would want to open the door to a forbidden child?
"The sunrise was wonderful, but the sunset…it's so beautiful."
Hiei was pulled from his thoughts as Miyuki spoke softly. He looked out over the water to see the magnificent sunset. It had just begun and the water was starting to turn an orange color as the sky changed to hues of pink and purple.
He glanced over at Miyuki. She was watching the waves crash impotently against the rocks. A gust of wind and sea-spray tossed her silvery white hair, now died a slight orange by the failing sunlight, about her shoulders. He noticed the softness of her face, the way she always seemed to look as if she held a terribly sad secret. If she were to look at him, he knew those sorrowful blue, blue eyes would eat away at his soul so he felt like he wanted to scream out loud and made his heart beat so fast.
"Yeah…beautiful…"
Miyuki looked at him and smiled. Hiei blushed ever so lightly and looked back at the water. Had she seen him looking at her?
"You know, I don't think I've seen such a beautiful sight as this in all the worlds." Miyuki said softly.
"How would you know if you've seen something as beautiful, you can't remember anything." Hiei said.
Miyuki nodded. She knew he wasn't trying to be cold, he was just asking a simple question. She looked sadly down at her hands. "You're right. I wouldn't know."
A flash of red dashed across his mind and he winced, pushing Miyuki's memories back. She noticed his change in manner and peered over at him, a worried expression on her face.
"Are you all right?"
"I'm fine,"
"Oh…"
They sat watching the sun setting even lower, until it was nearly gone. They shared the silence companionably until Hiei realized Miyuki was shivering.
"Are you cold?" He asked, looking over at her. She had her arms wrapped about her stomach, a dreamy look on her face. She didn't respond to his words so he reached out a hand to shake her.
As his palm made contact with her shoulder he was struck by shades of red and light blues. Miyuki's figure appeared strong in his mind.
Why do you lock away your heart?
Because…
You are afraid of being hurt?
I am afraid of nothing.
The expression on Miyuki's face fell and she began to fuzz out again. Hiei reached out with his mind and held on as hard as he could, trying to keep her longer.
Wait…!
- cannot wa – you. You – to – ant me to st -
Miyuki!
Hiei gave another hard pull along the link and the picture seemed to adjust like a TV set. Miyuki suddenly sprang into crisp focus, a smile adorning her lips.
You want me to stay?
… Her image began to waver, Yes!
Why?
Hiei balked at this question. Why did he want her to stay? She was beautiful…and she seemed to hold the promise of something he had never been promised before.
Love.
But did he want it?
I …
Hiei, why? Miyuki seemed to need to hear this as much as he needed to say it.
I want to … to be with you. He felt foolish after the words were out. Couldn't he have come up with a better way to say it?
It's all right.
Hiei blinked his crimson eyes as the link broke and he found himself looking into Miyuki's face. It was awfully close.
Really close.
Too close!
Before he could jerk his head back she gently slid her cool palm over his cheek and caressed his face. Her eyes seemed full of gentleness as she gazed into his eyes.
"Hiei…will you let me be the key?"
Their lips drifted closer in the small gap between each other.
"Will you let me love you?"
Hiei suddenly rediscovered his body could move and jerked back. He looked at Miyuki, sitting on the rocks, slightly leaning forward, and gazing at him with hurt. She watched as he turned around and ran.
Her mind was slow to realize that it was real, she wasn't dreaming. Hiei had rejected her. He had stood up and ran away from her when she had tried to bear her soul to him. She gave a soft moan, and nothing could describe the pain as her heart shattered into a million delicately sharp fragments.
To Be Continued…Word Help: Doki doki =It's a Japanese sound effect. Yes, they say their sound effects. Doki doki is the sound of someone's heart beating fast, weather it be because they are scared, nervous or excited.
AN: The first half to a poem entitled "Key To My Heart" by an unknown author. I see it as if Hiei is saying it, because if you think, it does seem that he's tried to trust and love before, but he was only betrayed and tossed out (in one case literally). The second half of the poem is in the sixth and last chapter, Key.
