Hiei awoke to someone shaking him awake. For a brief moment, he imagined it was Miyuki, but when he opened a flame colored eye, it was only Ko-Enma, and boy did he look mad.
"What do you want?" Hiei grumbled.
"Where's Miyuki? You were with her last, right?" Ko-Enma demanded.
"Hiei…will you let me be the key?"
"Yeah, I was with her last night." Hiei said, sitting up. "She's probably in her room or outside."
"No, she's not. We've checked everywhere." Ko-Enma pinned Hiei with a suspicious glare. "Are you sure you don't know where she is?"
For all he knew, Miyuki could still be sitting at the rocks in the same position he had left her in.
"Will you let me love you?"
Hiei shook his head and put a hand to his temples. He got up after Ko-Enma left and dressed. After a lengthy internal battle, he decided he would go to the rocks, just to be sure.
But when he arrived in the cold morning air there was nobody there. Part of him was relieved. If Miyuki wasn't there, then he wouldn't have to talk to her. He wouldn't have to face those hurt blue eyes and soft pink lips. He sat down miserably where Miyuki had sat; he could still feel the residue of her reiki, so similar to his.
He turned his head when he sensed his sister walking up behind him. She stood beside him for a moment, and then sat down also.
"Hiei, are you all right?"
"I'm fine."
Yukina balked at her brother's foul mood for a moment, but then pressed on anyway. "Is it about Miyuki?"
Hiei winced and she knew she had hit the nail on the head. He turned his eyes to the water and seemed to ignore Yukina's presence all together. She reached out a hand and touched his shoulder lightly, regaining his attention.
"What happened?"
Hiei gave in. His sister was probably the only person he could trust with this anyway. "The link was re-established."
"That's all?" Yukina seemed doubtful.
"And she …" No matter how hard he tried, he didn't seem to be able to say the words.
"She…?"
"She wanted to be with me." He said, feeling ashamed at his weakness. A mighty warrior, and he was stopped by a puny, simple word.
Yukina prodded farther with the ut-most care. "She … cared for you?"
Hiei nodded his head, grateful his sister knew him well enough.
Yukina looked at the side of Hiei's face, eyebrows knitted in thought. "So, she ran away?"
"Well…not because of that." Hiei admitted. "She didn't really run away first…" Damn his pride. Even to his sister he couldn't be specific.
Yukina spent some time puzzling out Hiei's cryptic words until she felt she had pieced them together well enough to understand. "So, Miyuki cared for you, and you ran away, which hurt her, so she must have run away too?"
Hiei gave a miserable nod.
"We should probably at least tell the others that we know she ran away." Yukina said.
Hiei sighed. "Whatever, I don't care anymore."
Yukina looked at her brother with growing worry. She stood up and dusted off her robe where she had been sitting. "Hiei…just promise me one thing."
"Hn."
"Promise me…promise that you'll do what you think is right. Do what you want and don't care about anything else."
Hiei only stared at the lapping waves. Yukina gave a small smile when she saw him nod his head slightly. She turned around and walked back to the resort, where she knew the others were looking for Miyuki.
***
Hiei walked silently along the beach, watching as the sand passed by underfoot. Yukina had made him promise that he would do what he wanted to do.
But what did he want?
He was so confused.
When he was around Miyuki, he felt strange, like his heart was being pinched tight and butterflies were fluttering around in his stomach. He felt like staying away to stop the strange sensations, but at the same time he wanted to move closer to her. He couldn't explain the crazy thoughts that went through his mind when she was near.
Come to think of it, he remembered Kurama speaking about feelings like that. Yusuke and Kuwabara too, only for them it had been when they were around Keiko, Yukina and Boton. And now they were lovers.
"Shimatta!"
Lovers?! So did that mean he … loved Miyuki? He knew he had wanted to be around her, but to go so far as loving her?
He shuffled through his thoughts, which proved to be a difficult task indeed. No, he couldn't love her. He couldn't love anybody, and in turn nobody could love him.
But…
"Hiei…will you let me be the key?"
But she had looked like she was being truthful. Her eyes had held within them a silent promise.
"Will you let me love you?"
He buried his face deep within his palms and shuddered at the memory of her soft words.
"…let me love you…"
And he had run away from her. Like a frightened little dog with his tail held firmly between his legs. All because of that damn word!
"…love you…"
With a frustrated groan he pressed his fingertips into his eyes, trying to keep everything from spilling out. Trying not to let the feelings engulf him like he knew they would. He had ran away from something that he had always wanted to feel…wanted to experience…but was always too afraid to admit. And there was the truth of it all.
He was afraid.
Deep inside, he was afraid that his friends would desert him, that his sister would start to hate him and that he would have to go back to living alone in the Makai. Miyuki had finally broken through the wall…a wall that had stood tall and strong for so many years. But she wasn't here to witness it. She wasn't here to finally see her love returned.
He had lost her, and with her, went the feelings. Now he was left feeling empty, and it hurt so badly.
An obsidian tear trickled from the corner of his eye, forming into a tear gem and glittering coldly as it fell to the sands, where it was lost forever.
Just like Miyuki.
***
When Hiei walked in through the front door he was nearly pounced upon by Boton. He was too miserable to care much, but when she thrust a piece of paper with writing on it he snapped to attention. It was signed by Miyuki. He read aloud.
Dear Friends,
Thank you for showing me all the wonderful things of the Ningenkai. I would have liked to stay longer, but it is time for me to leave back to the Makai. Please don't come with.
Sayonara
Miyuki
"Sayonara…" Hiei breathed softly.
"It isn't too surprising that she left, however I didn't think it would be so soon." Ko-Enma said.
Yusuke read the letter over, "The Makai?! She'll be murdered!"
"This is Miyuki we're talking about." Boton said. "Remember, she's been traveling between the three worlds since they were created."
"But why is she going back so soon?" Keiko asked.
Ko-Enma shrugged. "There must be some sort of threat."
"I guess we just…forget about her?" Yusuke said quietly.
"Until she is forced back to her child form, yes." Ko-Enma said. "And that won't likely be for some time. You'll all be quite old by that time, I think."
Hiei shook his head suddenly. "I don't care."
"Huh?"
"I'm going to go to the Makai and look for her."
"But she's not in any danger and she specifically asked for no one to come with." Ko-Enma said.
"I said I don't care." Hiei said coldly.
"But how are you going to find her?" Kuwabara asked. Hiei gave the tall, orange haired youth a withering glare. He brushed the hair from his forehead, revealing his bandana. "Oh right, that freaky eye."
"Let me come with you." Yusuke said. "I can help."
"No, I'm going alone." Hiei disappeared with a swish of cloth, leaving the others staring at the place where he stood before.
***
Miyuki let out a shuttering breath as she collapsed to her knees, beside her a dismembered youkai fell to the dirt with a sickening thud. Bits and pieces of memories were trickling back, things that were important for her to know. How to defend, to fight and to kill. A part of her ached, but she gritted her teeth and stood. It didn't help to dwell over the past. She had her job to do.
Protect the three worlds, keep them aligned, keep them stable and keep everyone and everything living. How ironic, she thought, that once her will to go on had left her, she still had to go on. No matter how much she wanted to, she couldn't just allow herself to fade away. She was still technically needed; even if it wasn't by the one person she wanted it to be.
It had been hard to say sayonara to her newly found friends, people she had hoped to be able to spend time with, even if she would have to watch some of them grow old and die. Kurama, Boton, Ko-Enma, Yukina and…Hiei. They were of the other world, the Makai and the Reikai.
Maybe…over time, Hiei would accept her.
No, that's what Yukina and Kurama had said. Hiei had run away, had rejected her. He didn't love her. She felt foolish for allowing herself to actually think that she could love someone and they would return it.
Her thoughts were halted by the soft sound of a swishing cloak, and Miyuki looked up only to turn quickly away. Her eyes were lying to her, her mind was just telling her what she wanted to see and hear.
"Yameru! Miyuki, onegai!"
Miyuki halted, slowly turning her head. He was really there, and he was pleading her to stop. She watched as he leapt gracefully from the tree and landed at its base. He stood to his full height and looked at her. No words were spoken, and a gentle breeze idly tossed Hiei's main of jet-black hair, marred only by the white starburst that ran through it.
"What do you want, Hiei?" Miyuki asked.
Hiei flinched internally at the void expression on her face. He moved closer to her, until he was far enough away so that if he reached out with his hand, he could touch her. "I…"
She waited silently for him to say what he wanted. Inside, however, she was crumbling. She wanted to sink to her knees and cry.
"Could you really love a forbidden child?" He finally asked.
Miyuki looked startled for a moment. "What does that have to do with any of it? A person could love anyone…if they loved them back."
"I…don't quite understand how. But…" Hiei looked into Miyuki's face. "Onegai, don't leave."
Her eyes widened. "You…want me to stay?"
"Hai." Hiei said, nodding. Awkwardly he reached down and took her hand. "Miyuki, I…" Gods it was hard to say this! "I was afraid of loosing the people I loved. When you left…I realized that I was afraid of loosing you the most."
Tears began to prick at the corner of Miyuki's eyes. Gently, Hiei reached up and brushed them gently away with his fingertips. "Hiei…aishiteru…" She choked. This was it, if Hiei didn't return her love…she didn't know what she would do.
For a moment, Hiei stiffened. And then he leaned forward and kissed her. When he pulled away and looked into her eyes, a rare smile ghosted across his lips. "Aishiteru."
*Owari*
Ending Note: I, personally, like the ending. But I just know there will be some people who are not satisfied with it. I don't know what to do about it, except write an Alternate Ending if I ever rouse up enough enthusiasm or inspiration. Tell me what you guys want, and I guess I could give what you say a try. But please, don't ask for a lemon, because I have retired from my lemony days, and only on rare occasions will I write one.
