OK this is the second chapter in Bill's Story I've put this at a PG if you
think it needs to be higher let me know I wasn't sure. Arwen's words are
must, ride, than, you ,very ,cross, broke and nail. Do also apologize for
those with braces I AM NOT TAKING THE PISS WELL I AM SORT OF BUT PLEASE
DON'T TAKE IT THE WRONG WAY!!1 sorry
Day 2: God last night was awful it was cold and it had rained most of the day and when it finally stops late into the night cow's arse starts frigging singing thought oh god kill me now, but oh no I had to sit there all night listening to him sing, bloody weirdo.
Day 5: Right picture this 3 hobbits and a weirdo sitting round a fire listening cow's arse sing then action hero hobbit starts asking questions about what he's singing and just when I didn't think things could get any worse Sam starts warbling too. All hobbits look amazed then join in singing like friggin happy campers round a fire. Camp yes they are like a choir touring the shit pits of middle earth aaarrrrrrrrrrggggggghhhhhhh.
Still Gandalf has made no appearance but I tell you what I did hear in the bushes last night two voices one whispering "oh arie baby!" then the other said "god my knees hurt from bending down can we switch. " then Merry or precious Pippin says "there's not a stone high enough for me to reach."
Then cow's arse comes out from behind a tree all stropy but I didn't see the short shit appear. But then about 2o minutes later I heard it again but this time it wasn't cow's arse it was two short shits defiantly pint size pippin I could tell by his high pitch voice, you see it hasn't broken yet so he sounds like a fairy with a fork up it's arse!!!
Day 6: Well last night was interesting right we was up on this weathertop when Sam and Pippin being the greedy buggers that they are lit a fire to cook yet more bacon and drew all those cloaked weirdo's from bree towards us. They came with swords to beat the crap out of us (well them I was already hiding by this point!) So action hobbit is jumping all round the place off rocks and the like then knocks himself out on a low hanging branch, Bloody idiot.
All Pippin could do was run around in circles screaming. But cow's arse is a good fighter he got all the buggers I thought well done you smells awful but fights damn good. Oh yeah Frodo got stabbed by one of the weirdo's then this elvish bird came and took him on her horse (who I will say is mighty fine!!) to Rivendale ut the funny thing about her was she had braces and a really bad lisp and she said.
"I can wide muth faster wan woo, now I muth go owwise daddy will be wery crosth."
At with that she got on her horse and said. "damn I roke a wail."
So Frodos gone with arwen and we are following behind her . Things got exciting for a bit. still no Gandalf but bloody hell that horse was fit!!
Day 2: God last night was awful it was cold and it had rained most of the day and when it finally stops late into the night cow's arse starts frigging singing thought oh god kill me now, but oh no I had to sit there all night listening to him sing, bloody weirdo.
Day 5: Right picture this 3 hobbits and a weirdo sitting round a fire listening cow's arse sing then action hero hobbit starts asking questions about what he's singing and just when I didn't think things could get any worse Sam starts warbling too. All hobbits look amazed then join in singing like friggin happy campers round a fire. Camp yes they are like a choir touring the shit pits of middle earth aaarrrrrrrrrrggggggghhhhhhh.
Still Gandalf has made no appearance but I tell you what I did hear in the bushes last night two voices one whispering "oh arie baby!" then the other said "god my knees hurt from bending down can we switch. " then Merry or precious Pippin says "there's not a stone high enough for me to reach."
Then cow's arse comes out from behind a tree all stropy but I didn't see the short shit appear. But then about 2o minutes later I heard it again but this time it wasn't cow's arse it was two short shits defiantly pint size pippin I could tell by his high pitch voice, you see it hasn't broken yet so he sounds like a fairy with a fork up it's arse!!!
Day 6: Well last night was interesting right we was up on this weathertop when Sam and Pippin being the greedy buggers that they are lit a fire to cook yet more bacon and drew all those cloaked weirdo's from bree towards us. They came with swords to beat the crap out of us (well them I was already hiding by this point!) So action hobbit is jumping all round the place off rocks and the like then knocks himself out on a low hanging branch, Bloody idiot.
All Pippin could do was run around in circles screaming. But cow's arse is a good fighter he got all the buggers I thought well done you smells awful but fights damn good. Oh yeah Frodo got stabbed by one of the weirdo's then this elvish bird came and took him on her horse (who I will say is mighty fine!!) to Rivendale ut the funny thing about her was she had braces and a really bad lisp and she said.
"I can wide muth faster wan woo, now I muth go owwise daddy will be wery crosth."
At with that she got on her horse and said. "damn I roke a wail."
So Frodos gone with arwen and we are following behind her . Things got exciting for a bit. still no Gandalf but bloody hell that horse was fit!!
