]+ ELECTRONIC TRANSCENDENCE PRODUCTIONS +[
presents

]+ NEON EPOCH +[
]+ E V A N G E L I O N +[

]+ EPISODE 10: STRUGGLING TOWARDS DIVINE +[

By Eliot "Lostfactor" Lefebvre

Based off of "Shin Seiki Evangelion" by GAINAX

]++[

I denied myself nothing my eyes desired;
I refused my heart no pleasure.
My heart took delight in all my work,
and this was the reward for all my labor.
- ECCLESIASTES 2:10

]++[

Despite the innate grayness of Ryo's apartment, Niobe had found that
keeping the window of the largely-unused living room open did wonders
for making the place seem less drab, and as she laced the ribbons of
her old ballet shoes up around her calves she took a moment to stare at
the pool of light streaming in from outside of the apartment. She'd
woken up early, but Ryo had already left, presumably because he was
needed for tests down at Central Dogma before school started. She
planned to go to the facility herself before she was scheduled for
synch testing, to try and get some actual practice in the Geo-Front
with EVA-05, but there were other things that she needed to do first.

With a smile of satisfaction, she tied the pale yellow ribbon on her
left leg, the light color in stark contrast with her dark chocolate-
colored skin, and she shifted her legs slightly, grabbing the other
shoe from off the couch and slipping her right foot into the remaining
shoe. Though she'd disposed of nearly all her personal belongings
nearly a week prior, her shoes had remained, a gift from her mother
that had strictly utilitarian purposes. She'd tried actively to forget
about the day that her mother had given them to her, knowing that the
memory was ascribing importance to them where they should have none.

The ribbon pulled tight on her other leg, and Niobe stood, feeling
perfectly comfortable in the tight fabric of her outfit, almost more
comfortable with the skintight material clinging nuzzling her flesh
underneath than in looser clothes. It reminded her of the plugsuit,
though the fit was slightly different, and the thought of her Eva made
her feel better about her actions, reminding herself that she was doing
nothing for her own gratification, simply to become a better pilot. "I
have to be better," she whispered to herself as she stepped over to the
small black boombox that she'd set up at one side of the room, smiling
as she said it, comfortable with the rate at which she was progressing
and simply stating the words as a mantra. "I have to be the best."

Leaning over, she pressed the small white play button on the top of the
device, then glanced around the room as the disc began to whir inside
of the machine, looking at the bland and colorless furniture, all
shoved up against the walls to give her enough space to move. Taking a
deep breath, she slowly arched her body into a ready position, toes
poised to move as soon as the first note came from the instruments on
the disc, arms held loosely but capably, only waiting for the song to
start.

A lone trilling note came from the dusty speakers of the box, and Niobe
closed her eyes as she began to move her body slowly, letting her legs
arch and step in time with the music, feeling the warmth of the sun on
her body. The music was beginning slowly, and it was perfect, the
notes simply hanging in the air and letting Niobe gradually step her
way into the routine, the sun embracing her as her movements slowly
became faster with the beat of the music. A violin quickly joined the
flute, and the tempo increased ever so slightly, a change that Niobe
noticed immediately and shifted her pace to accommodate, focusing only
on what she needed her body to do as the two instruments were joined by
more and more. "Keep focused," she muttered, trying to call up
memories of her old classes back at home. "Let the music take you."

Stepping softly around the room, tensing her feet and balancing on the
absolute edge of her toes as the music proceeded to increase its speed
slightly, Niobe felt her muscles tensing beneath the fabric of her
leotard, her body gradually becoming less and less affected by what was
outside of it, the music taking her along with it. It was a wonderful
sensation, but she knew enough not to focus on the exhaltation of the
growing dance, instead keeping her mind on the music, knowing that
focusing on the feeling ensured that it would vanish. Her legs moved
in slow, sweeping paths, stepping around the room in prefect time, her
motions all but silent, hair swinging behind her as she danced. Then
the music began to increase in tempo once again, still moving slowly
but now enough for Niobe to know that it was nearing the end.

More instruments joined the piece as Niobe opened her eyes, moving
quickly enough that she only distantly registered the shapes of the
furniture in the room as she twirled about, the only truly prominent
feature the bright stream of light from the window. It seemed almost
approving as she let herself move in and out of it as the music
demanded, her position pulling away from the sunlight for a moment,
then back towards the beautiful spot where it hit the floor, then away
once again. Still, she kept her mind on the music, moving her body
back towards a ready position as it trailed off, feeling the thinnest
film of sweat covering her muscles, her chest heaving only slightly.
One foot was arched high, the other tapping slowly, counting out the
beats until the next piece, one she knew was far faster, began.

Then the short, staccato noise of a violin cut through the air, and
Niobe thrust herself once more into action, feeling as she moved a
second too late, knowing that if she had reacted just a half-second
earlier she would have been able to do more before the deep oboe joined
into the melody. She gritted her teeth, closing her eyes and once
again focusing entirely on the music, whirling her legs and arms in
patterns that she knew by heart, letting her feet pull her up to the
tips of her toes before letting her back down, the muscles in her
thighs shifting and tensing with trained perfection, thrusting her into
the air a few inches at a time, then letting her legs react smoothly to
the landing, no abrupt stops or awkward returns to the ground.

Opening her eyes once again, she continued to focus on the music as she
twirled around, her breathing coming heavily as her body moved in
intricate loops, arms brought up to her chest to keep her balanced as
she spun. The room had been reduced to colors, for her, meaning that
it was an indistinct blob of gray broken only by a pure white stream of
light, a stream that nourished her even as it seemed to threaten her
already-warm body with overhearting. Her thoughts didn't stray for an
instant, however, ignoring the warmth of the sun and the colors of the
room, hearing only the music and feeling only the direction her limbs
needed to move, the world around her seeming to move in slow-motion as
she calmly concentrated and wove her way around the room, focus
unwavering.

"What are you doing?" The voice was unmistakably Ryo's, and it managed
to cut through the music, distracting Niobe and leaving her unbalanced
in the middle of her movements, Ryo's form swinging in front of her
vision for a moment as she felt herself start to fall. Gritting her
teeth, she shifted her weight and slammed her feet down, forcing
herself to remain balanced. It seems for a moment as though she would
fall regardless, but a moment later she felt herself balance as the
room slowly returned to normal in her eyes, Ryo standing in the hallway
staring at her, wearing what looked to be purely functional clothes, a
plain white shirt that hung loosely around him couple with light tan
jeans.

"I was dancing," replied Niobe after a moment, regaining her breath
slowly, glancing down and realizing how tight the fabric around her
chest was stretching. Blushing, she glanced over at Ryo to see if he
was looking, but his eyes were simply fixed blankly on her, something
that seemed relatively unsurprising considering what she knew about
him. "Ballet." She stepped over to the chair pressed against the
wall, snatching the white cotton towel from it as she pressed the stop
button on the boombox. "I didn't think that you'd be back so soon."

Ryo didn't reply immediately, simply watched as Niobe wiped the thin
film of sweat off her body, the small droplets of water glittering
against her dark skin in the sunlight. "Why do you do it?" he asked at
length, cocking his head slightly to one side as she rubbed the liquid
off of her legs.

"Because it helps me focus," she replied, grunting slightly, untying
the knot that held the ribbons of her shoes on her legs casually and
letting out an inward sigh of relief at the relaxation of pressure on
her feet as she slipped out of them. Closing her eyes momentarily, she
arched both feet, enjoying the cool air against them for just a moment
and taking a deep breath, her chest still heaving. "It's a great way
to practice without actually being in the Eva. You learn to react to
things in a whole different way, to just drift along with what's going
on around you and not worry about the little details."

Once again, Niobe received no immediate response from Ryo, and she
grimaced slightly, feeling as though she'd done something wrong.
Turning her back towards him, she paused for a second, then drew the
towel against the exposed part of her skin, arching her back as best
she could, doing her all to look alluring. He still didn't seem to
notice, and she suppressed a twinge of anger, wondering if something
was wrong with him. "You dance to be better in the Eva," he said
flatly, the slightest hint of emotion in his voice suggesting that it
was more of a question than a statement. She turned her head slightly
towards him and nodded, resisting the urge to look hopeful. "Why?"

Smiling, she turned fully towards Ryo, trying to push her chest
outwards slightly, knowing that it would make her at least look
temporarily more attractive. "Because I plan to be the best," she
announced defiantly, slinging the white cotton towel over her
shoulders, taking a few steps towards Ryo and swinging her hips as best
she could. She felt a bit ridiculous, but with a minor pang of
resentment she reminded herself that she was dealing with a very pale
man, someone who probably wasn't naturally attracted to her skin. "So
that I can get the job done. So that we're successful, no matter
what." She paused, staring into his blank eyes, wondering if he hadn't
gotten the point of her statements. "You want that, and I want that
too."

Ryo simply stared back at her, and Niobe felt something between
frustration with him and frustration with herself knot up inside of her
gut as she stared at him. "That's good," he offered at length, turning
around and heading back down the hall. Niobe glared at the boy for a
moment, and before he reached his room he stopped and turned halfway
around. "I'm going to go change for school. If you need me, I will be
in my room."

The door to Ryo's room shut, and Niobe found herself staring blankly at
the space he'd occupied a few moments before, eyes wide and her mind
struggling to figure out what was going on with the boy. Sighing
heavily, she walked back to her room, grabbing her ballet shoes and
dragging them along behind herself half-heartedly, unsure of what to
do. She knew that she was attracted to him, but it seemed rather
certain that he still wasn't attracted to her, that for whatever reason
he still didn't think she was good enough. "What am I not doing
right?" she muttered, shutting the door to her room and staring at the
gray wall, then slumping against the door and tilting her head towards
the full-length mirror against the wall to her left.

An idea began to surface in her head, and after a moment's hesitation
she flicked the lock on her door, tossed her shoes on the bed, and took
a deep breath, staring at herself intently in the mirror as she removed
her leotard, peeling the sweat-soaked fabric off her body, examining
the skin underneath. She frowned and took a step closer to the mirror,
looking herself over, certain that it had to be something about the way
she looked, that there had to be some reason why he didn't seem to be
returning her affections. Turning to look at herself from the side,
she tried tracing over her body, trying to find any flaws, any stray
bits of fat that might be blossoming up like tumors.

"Nothing," she muttered to herself at length, walking over to the bed
and flopping against it, feeling somewhat refreshed by the cool air
wafting over her back. "I'm fine. I'm thin. I'm pretty. Even Joseph
tells me that. Why doesn't he like me?" She pushed her head against
the pillow, letting the soft darkness envelop her eyes as she sighed
heavily. "What am I doing wrong? We've even fought the Angels
together now. What else does he want?"

Something stuck in her mind, and after a second her eyes widened, the
reason for his continued ignorance of her painfully obvious. "It's the
Angels," she mutterd, smiling and pushing herself off the bed, feeling
a sudden sense of relief. "I've only had a little time to prove
myself, and he can't be certain yet if I've just been getting lucky. I
just have to keep working harder, to be more innovative." She smiled
more broadly, rolling onto her back as she flopped back on the bed,
clutching her hands together and folding them over her chest, feeling
the soft spandex of her bra brush against her bare arms. "How silly.
I of all people ought to recognize a challenge when one is given to me."

Laughing at herself, Niobe felt as though a weight had been lifted off
her shoulders as she resolved to do still better, standing from the bed
as she resolved to do all she could against the next Angel. Stepping
over to her closet, she thought for a moment before grabbing a light
yellow blouse and a short tan skirt, unfastening her sports bra as she
stepped back towards the bureau to fetch another one. "I'll make him
like me," she breathed, shutting her eyes slightly as she opened a
drawer and began to feel for the underwear. "I know I will."

]++[

Glancing around the dusty entrance to the schoolyard, Neil suddenly
found himself feeling very lost, wishing that he'd been able to try
going to the school before. He and Eiko had planned to have lunch on
the Thursday after the war games with the JSSDF, but Neil had forgotten
the fact that his schedule at Central Dogma prevented any such activity
until the following Monday. And with Nieve's various advances, he
hadn't found the time to check out the school, leaving him surrounded
by Japanese children without any distinct way of finding Eiko.

"Excuse me," he said to a passing group of girls, receiving no
acknowledgement as they walked past and giggled, though Neil couldn't
tell whether it was at him or something else. Frowning, he turned
towards another group, but they were already past him before he could
even get a word out. "Um, excuse me, anyone," he asked again, trying
to draw attention to himself as the Japanese children flowed past him,
their uniforms identical, none of them even giving Neil a sideways
glance despite the fact that he stood out like a sore thumb. "Excuse
me, does anyone know where Eiko Suzuhara is? Eiko Suzuhara.
Anybody." He paused. "Anyone know where the -ground- is? Anybody?
Do you even see me?"

Neil still received no response, and sighing he stepped over to the
nearest bench set up along the dusty walkways in front of the school,
the sand surrounding the concrete sidewalk scuffed into the sidewalk as
students continued to take shortcuts through the sand towards their
destination. Tilting his head back, Neil tried to think of another way
to find Eiko, having little success as other thoughts filled his head.
He was still trying very hard to understand why Nieve had seemed to
fall so completely for him, especially considering the context of their
first meeting. It wasn't that he disliked the attention, or even that
he disliked her, but it was a little bit baffling to him. "Suppose
it's looking a gift horse in the mouth," he muttered, closing his eyes
to the blue sky above him, trying to free his mind from thoughts of the
red-haired girl.

"Over here!" Neil recognized the voice, and leaning forward he could
see Eiko standing at the edge of what looked to be a garden, standing
on her tiptoes and waving towards the bench where Neil sat, a small bag
in her left hand as she waved with her right. Waving back, Neil shaded
his eyes from the sun for a moment, then stood and walked over to the
place where she stood, smiling at her and waving gently as she returned
to a normal standing positiong. "I'm sorry. I should have known that
you wouldn't know I was."

"It's okay," replied Neil with a shrug, following closely behind Eiko
as she walked through the garden-like area towards a series of benches,
a few other students sitting around them underneath the cool shade of
the trees. "The other students here were particularly helpful." Eiko
took a seat at one of the benches, and Neil, feeling the slightest bit
uncomfortable, took a seat on the same bench, trying to put the right
amount of distance between the two of them so that they could talk
normally without looking as though they were an item. "Doesn't Vash
usually have lunch with you?"

Eiko shrugged, opening the small bag and drawing out what looked to
Neil like an old Chinese takeout container. He stared for just a
second, then went about opening his own lunch, a simple turkey sandwich
with a few crackers and a soda. "It depends on whether or not he has
something else to do at lunch," Eiko explained, taking a bite out of
the takeout container of something that Neil couldn't identify. "This
time he was meeting with Kensuke to settle some game dispute. I think
Vash was in the lead, last time I checked."

Neil took a bite out of his sandwich, watching the girl as she ate,
noting involuntarily the slender curves of her neck, the almost
delicate way that her jaw moved as she chewed her food. He wanted very
much to be thinking of her only as a friend, especially with Nieve in
the picture, but something about her appearance made it seem
impossible. "Don't you like video games?" he asked after a moment,
trying to distract himself as he turned back towards the white-bread
sandwich in his hands.

"Oh, you wouldn't believe me if I told you," replied Eiko, winking
slyly at Neil and making him grin despite the guilt that was starting
to swim through the boy's thoughts. "But I'm not nearly as competitive
as those two are. As far as I know -" She paused for a moment, then
leaned over towards Neil's ear, sending a minor electric rush through
his body. "I think it's their way of trying to decide who has the
bigger penis."

Almost choking on his sandwich, Neil had to jerk forward and cough as
he started laughing, completely thrown by Eiko's remark. She looked
concerned for a moment, but he held up a hand as the coughs faded,
replaced entirely by laughter that she soon joined in. "I didn't think
that you were allowed to say things like that," breathed Neil, his
throat stinging slightly from the brief moment of asphyxiation, eyes
tearing just enough to glitter in the sunlight.

"I'm -not-," replied Eiko with a slight giggle, taking a small bite of
her lunch once again before turning back towards Neil, still smiling.
"If my parents knew that I said something like that, they'd have a
heart attack. Heck, they'd have a heart attack just from learning that
I knew that word." Her eyes shut lightly, and her smile seemed to
shift ever so slightly to bitterness. "But, hey, that's the way things
work over here. You're not supposed to learn about these things."

Taking another bite of his sandwich, Neil stared over at Eiko,
searching for the right words to say. He knew that the girl was
letting him into something deeply private simply by her tone of voice,
but he wasn't sure if he wanted to be let in, if that wouldn't
complicate things even more. Sighing slightly, he edged closer to her,
feeling a rush of guilt but happy to see that she didn't seem upset by
his movement. "You sound bitter," he noted, trying to sound as non-
judgemental as possible.

"Yeah, I guess I am, a little," replied Eiko, leaning back against the
bench, the fabric of her blouse tightening against her body and
producing a hard lump in Neil's throat as he looked almost
involuntarily. He almost wished that Nieve was there, that if he had
the girl by him he wouldn't feel so guilty about his proximity to
Eiko. "It never comes down to what I want, not with my parents. Heck,
I remember how proud I was when I..." She trailed off, then tilted her
head slightly away from Neil, almost as if she felt guilty as well.
"Never mind."

Neil frowned for a moment, then reached over and put his hand on her
shoulder, prompting her to look back at him immediately. "You can't
tell me that much and then expect me to 'never mind,'" he said,
grinning even though he felt slightly bitter about her sudden
recalcitrance. She smiled a little at the statement, and Neil found
himself feeling ever so slightly better about himself as he edged a
little closer to the girl. "Come on. Please, let me know."

Eiko's face began to turn a deep crimson, and glancing around the
garden for a moment she leaned her mouth back towards Neil's ear, the
same shock running down Neil's spine as he felt the warmth of her
breath. "Vash and I... we almost slept together," she announced,
trying to sound as decisive as possible, her eyes turned in such a way
that she couldn't see Neil's right fist clench involuntarily. "I know
that's probably not as big a deal for Americans, but... well, it's
really not supposed to happen here. Frowned upon." She leaned away as
Neil's hand relaxed, his eyes flashing for just an instant with anger
as he looked back towards her. "My parents would have been so angry if
I'd gone through with it. It would have been like setting the house on
fire."

"But you didn't," offered Neil, feeling instantly relieved by the
knowledge that it hadn't happened. He felt like a horrible person for
it, but still, he was reassured to know that Eiko was still a virgin,
even though he knew academically that it shouldn't have any bearing on
him. "Why?"

The blush on Eiko's cheeks deepened, and Neil opened his mouth to
retract the question before Eiko sighed deeply, shaking her head.
"It's really kind of embarassing," she breathed, staring towards the
ground for a moment. "I wanted to do it, but... I just couldn't go
through with it." She smirked, staring over at Neil, an odd sort of
look resting behind her eyes that Neil couldn't quite understand. "You
know what's really weird? I couldn't stop thinking about you. We were
getting started, just fooling around, and then I just suddenly couldn't
stop thinking about you." She blushed more deeply, as though she was
afraid Neil would be angry. "Weird, right?"

Neil simply stared at the girl for a moment, her statements unlocking a
tumble of emotions within him that he couldn't even start to sort out
as he swallowed hard and tried to figure out what to say. "I don't
know," he said after a moment, wiping away a thin layer of cold sweat
on his forehead, his words slowly piecing themselves together in his
mind. "I don't really have a frame of reference with this sort of
thing." He paused for a moment, then swallowed again. "If this was a
movie, that'd be a sign that we were going to wind up together in a
really bad romantic comedy, though. You know, you'd think about me
when you were with your other half, and I'd think about you when I was
with my other half, and... it'd be funny to somebody, I guess." He
swallowed hard once again, remembering the awkard feeling he'd gotten
the night he and Nieve had first kissed. "But we're not in a movie."

Both Children stared at one another, something sparking between their
eyes as the sun filtered through the trees onto them, a certain tension
hanging in the air that neither of them wanted to approach. "We
weren't talking about me before, though," Eiko said at length, edging
slightly away from Neil and blushing a bit more. "We were talking
about video games. You like video games?"

Part of Neil had wanted to pursue the previous topic of discussion, but
the more conscious part of his brain knew that nothing lay down that
path, that they'd gotten as far in that discussion as they were likely
to. "They're okay," he replied, shrugging somewhat absently and taking
another bite of his sandwich, reaching into the depths of his lunchbag
and drawing out his soda, opening the carbonated drink and letting a
small mist of the foam out of the top. "I never really got into them
too much. My mom was always way better at them than I was."

"Heh. My mother wouldn't touch the thing with a ten-foot pole. She
said she grew up thinking they were moronic and never saw any reason to
change her opinion." Taking a deep breath, Eiko smiled at Neil again,
both Children fully aware that they were avoiding the tension between
them, grasping at straws for any topic that would keep them off of the
obvious one. The two stared at one another for a moment, then went
back to their lunches, almost as if the lunch had become too painful
from subtext to continue.

Then Neil heard footsteps on the concrete walkway, the sort of
organized military clicking that simply didn't come from students
walking together. Glancing over, Neil saw the unmistakable uniforms of
NERV's intelligence division, the immaculate black suits and reflective
sunglasses, three agents glancing around with obvious intention. Neil
reached over and tapped Eiko on the shoulder just as they seemed to
notice the Children, and Eiko and Neil both took one final bite of
their lunches as the agents walked over to them, expressions neutral if
not stern, the trio moving out to flank the Children as though they
expected the two to try and escape. "Neil Richelieu and Eiko Suzuhara,
correct?" asked one of the agents standing directly in front of the
Children, a large white man with slick brown hair, built like a
football player and taller on top of that.

"Yeah," replied Neil, standing up a moment before Eiko, dwarfed by the
agent. He'd gotten used to looking at people at eye level or lower,
and the size of the man combined with the sheer height difference was
enough to give Neil a sense of distinct unease. "Is something wrong?
We didn't know that there was any -"

"Come with us," said the man, apparently unwilling to listen to the end
of Neil's statement. He turned on his heel, then gestured with one
hand towards the two Children as they exchanged a quick glance, the
other agents moving to block off any possible exits as best they
could. "Something important is happening down at the base. You're
needed." With that, he started walking, and both Neil and Eiko
followed, having no doubts that they would not have been given any
choice about the matter, the tension between them finally replaced with
something else by the sudden arrival.

]++[

Niobe's arms were folded across her chest, her irritation evident as
she sat towards the back of the room, the other Children mostly grouped
slightly further forward in the otherwise-empty conference room. She'd
wanted a chance to practice in her Eva, to get some more hours clocked
at least trying to improve her abilities, and instead she'd been pulled
from Ryo's apartment and taken to the bland teal room, waiting for the
Children to arrive. All it meant to her was that she was wasting time,
time that she knew could be spent in many ways, all of them infinitely
better than the present. "This is a waste of time," she muttered,
trying to keep her voice low enough that the other Children couldn't
hear her. "If they're not going to have us actually do something, they
might as well let us get something done on our own time."

"Probably another formal event," noted Nieve, sounding a bit more
relaxed and leaning her head back towards Niobe. She smirked at the
other woman, and Niobe returned the grin, having some identification
with her simply by virtue of their mutual experiences as long-standing
pilots. It was something that Niobe assumed the other Children simply
couldn't quite understand, that the environment of NERV was different
for those who had spent so much of their times in the organization.
"NERV has to keep up appearances with the outside, and we'll get
dragged along in the interim. It's useless, but at least we usually
get free food."

Almost without thinking, Niobe glanced towards Ryo as she nodded to
Nieve, her eyes going wide as she saw the boy's stare actually fixed on
something other than the empty space in the front of the room.
Following his gaze with her eyes, she realized that he was staring dead
at Nieve, and Niobe felt a minor twinge of jealousy, suddenly wondering
if perhaps there was something more that she didn't know about Nieve.
The other girl -had- been with NERV longer, and though she didn't know
for a fact she was willing to suspect that Ryo had been with the
organization at least as long, possibly even longer than either of
them. Distantly, she heard Nieve still talking to her about one of the
various formal events that she had attended in Ireland, but Niobe only
nodded distantly, the new potential wrinkle attracting the breadth of
her attention.

"But Nieve isn't interested in Ryo," she whispered to herself, barely
speaking loud enough to hear her own voice, much less for anyone else.
As though on cue, Nieve leaned over to Neil, sitting a couple chairs
away from her, grabbing one of his hands rather violently and planting
a quick peck on his cheek. Niobe watched as discreetly as she could,
then turned her eyes back towards Ryo, his gaze still on the other two
Children. "I have to make sure that Nieve doesn't leave Neil," she
muttered to herself, shifting somewhat uncomfortably in her seat,
feeling slightly less afraid on one level while she felt even more
nervous on another.

The noise of the lone door of the room opening drew the attention of
all the Children towards the side of the room, Vash and Neil both
exchanging a glance of familiarity first. They'd expected to see
Misato step through the door, but instead they saw Dr. Fuyutsuki step
in, surveying the group somewhat sternly before walking down towards
the front of the room, followed closely by Dr. Akagi. None of the
Children knew what to say as the two scientists reached the podium at
the front of the room, but as Kozou opened his mouth to speak Nieve
finally seemed to find her voice. "Shouldn't Misato be down here?" she
asked, a minor feeling of unease growing in the pit of her stomach.

Fuyutsuki stared at the girl for a moment, a look on his face that
almost seemed to be stern but was just the slightest bit too soft for
it. "That's not fesable at the moment," he replied at length,
gesturing for Ritsuko to step over to the podium as he made a quick
hand gesture towards the back of the room where the projector was
operated. Most of the Children glanced at least briefly towards the
rear of the room at Fuyutsuki's gesture, but Nieve simply stared ahead
at the projection room, feeling her disquiet compound as an image of a
volcano appeared on the main screen.

Vash muttered a question about what was going on too low to be heard
reliably, but before he had a chance to raise his voice Ritsuko began
talking, her voice quiet but forceful. "This is a picture of Mt.
Asamayama, to the north. It's a volcano, but it's been dormant for
years now. However, it recently seemed to begin undergoing some
seismic activity once again, so a research team was dispatched to try
and determine the cause." She paused for a moment, and the image
projected on the screen behind her shifted. "This was the result."

Niobe had to lean forward to even have the vaguest idea what she was
seeing, the picture blurry and only containing the barest detail,
largely a vast sea of black speckles covering a field of red. Towards
the center, however, she could make out a fuzzy shape, something that
looked as though it was more than simply a collection of the black dots
in an unusual pattern. "That's impossible," she muttered, blinking and
tracing over the imagined lines with her eyes. "Is that... an Angel?"

"Yes," replied Ritsuko flatly, the image changing once again to a
closer shot of the same shape. "We flew Captain Katsuragi to the site
this morning to investigate further and confirm that it was, in fact,
an Angel. Our scanning equipment revealed that it was, in fact,
generating an AT field with the correct pattern, and it was registered
as the Eighth Angel about half an hour ago." She paused for a moment,
letting the implications of her statement sink in. "However, we do
have one distinct advantage in this situation. The Angel appears to be
in a dormant state, and from what little we've been able to observe of
its physical structure, we've been led to believe that the Angel is in
some kind of larval stage." Once again, she paused, and the display
behind her switched to a picture of a wireframe model of the proto-
Angel, various computer displays still visible around it. "The chance
to study an Angel before it reaches maturity is unprecedented. We
might even have a chance to develop weaponry better suited to
destroying them."

"Our goal is to capture it," Fuyutsuki said bluntly, arms folded behind
him, his face stern without looking threatening. "Unfortunately, we do
not have any robotic recovery equipment capable of performing the
operation. Our best equipment could only take these photographs for
five seconds before being destroyed by the heat and pressure of the
magma, and it was still several dozen meters away from the target.
There is no automated means of recovering the Angel."

"What about the Evas?" asked Nieve, sounding particularly enthusiastic
as she leaned towards the front of the room, a grin spreading across
her face as her eyes sparkled with a sudden flash of inspiration.
Fuyutsuki frowned at her as though she'd interrupted him, but she
didn't seem to notice, turning towards Ritsuko instead. "The AT field
can withstand the force of a nuclear explosion, and the machine itself
is more than armored enough to keep itself alive down there. Why don't
we use one?"

Dr. Fuyutsuki sighed heavily, drawing Nieve's attention sheepishly back
in his direction. "Because there is no other method, we planned on
using an Evangelion unit to attempt to recover the embryo," he said
somewhat curtly, the comment obviously directed towards Nieve as she
began to blush a deep red. "Unfortunately, the conditions are poor for
even an Eva. The AT Field will provide limited buffering effects, and
as such we'll have to rely on extra shielding placed on the machine.
It's a risky operation."

Niobe's right hand twitched for a moment, then clenched into a fist as
she stood swiftly, her stare resolute as all eyes in the room turned
towards her. "I'll do it," she said flatly, no doubt in her mind as
she remembered what she'd figured out about Ryo, knowing that she
needed to make him respect her. "Equip my Eva, and I'll do it." She
closed her eyes, feeling a slight rush of terror at the thought of
diving but knowing that she couldn't afford not to.

Kozou stared at Niobe for a moment, then turned back towards the
Children as an aggregate, looking slightly irritated, in all likelihood
because of the constant interruptions. "After some brief deliberation,
we decided on the usage of EVA-02," he announced after a moment,
Niobe's eyes snapping open and her mouth shaping into a small circle
from surprise. "The Eva unit will be outfitted with -"

"I'll do it!" snapped Niobe, stomping her foot slightly, realizing that
she was making something of a fool out of herself but not caring. A
deep red blush began to blossom on the surface of her cheeks, but she
ignored it, knowing that she had to be involved in the mission, that
she couldn't let Nieve gain any more ground on her. "Didn't you hear
me? I'm happy to do it! Just give me the chance, and I'll..." She
trailed off, realizing that she was hardly sounding as though she were
the most responsible of the pilots, closer to a whining child. "I'm
sorry. I spoke out of turn."

The room remained silent as the girl sat back down, hanging her head
slightly and folding her hands on her lap, eyes closing tightly and
tears of embarassment seeping to the surface of her face. "EVA-02 is
designed to operate under extreme environmental conditions," Ritsuko
said after a moment, as though she were trying to placate Niobe, a
thought that only made the girl feel worse. "The unit is equipped with
additional heat and radiation shielding anyways, along with anti-
corrosive agents and armor designed for higher integrity under extreme
heat. It's built specifically for missions like this."

Doing her best not to allow herself tears, Niobe still felt them
dripping from her eyes out of sheer embarassment as she felt everyone
look towards her for some kind of response. At length, Kozou cleared
his throat, drawing the attention of the room back towards him.
"According to the operation specifications, we'll have two other Eva
units on standby in case something goes wrong with the operation.
Captain Katsuragi has requested EVA-01 and EVA-04, taking into
consideration the unique properties of both machines."

Once again, Niobe knew that now was the moment to speak, but this time
she stood slowly, drawing everyone's attention merely by virtue of her
motion. Gritting her teeth, she forced the tears to stop, ignoring the
ones that were still on her face with the knowledge that not
acknowledging their presence would make them less noticable to others.
"If I'm not assigned to the active spot, I'd like to stand as backup,"
Niobe said softly, almost as though she'd been defeated. "If it's
fesable."

An awkward pause followed, and Niobe could feel in the bottom of her
gut that they were going to say know, could see Ritsuko and Fuyutsuki
exchange a nervous glance before the woman opened her mouth to speak.
"We'd planned on going with Misato's decision," she offered at length,
sounding almost sheepish as Niobe hung her head once again. "Your
enthusiasm against the Angels is noted, but -"

Neil felt a lump of guilt forming in the base of his gut, and shutting
his eyes for a second he forced himself to his feet, wondering for only
an instant if he was doing something to be kind or simply to alleviate
the sensation of guilt he felt. "Let Niobe go instead of me," he said
firmly, drawing the attention of everyone in the room, Niobe included.
"I'm forfeiting my spot on the mission. She wants it more than I do,
so she'd probably do it better anyways." He paused for a moment, then
shrugged, reminding himself inwardly that he wouldn't have to pilot his
unit if Niobe went instead. The thought made him feel guilty once
again, but he pushed the guilt out of his expression, forcing himself
to stay indifferent in his appearance.

"Fine," muttered Fuyutsuki, raising a hand and waving it idly in the
air, sounding as though he was thoroughly exasperated by the whole
situation as he rubbed his forehead for a moment. "We'll send 04 and
05 along. It's unlikely that they'll be doing anything, anyways."
Sighing deeply, he folded his arms back behind his body, composing his
expression once again. "The units will be airlifted as soon as
possible. Ladies, please report to the locker room to change into your
plugsuits."

Still feeling slightly embarassed, Nieve stood as both Ritsuko and
Fuyutsuki moved to file out of the room, followed closely by Niobe.
She sighed, then leaned over to embrace Neil, a gesture which somehow
managed to surprise him. "I'm going to miss you," she whispered,
smiling at him with obvious meaning and planting a single finger on his
lips before she turned away towards the exit. Almost unintentionally
her eyes drifted towards Eiko, and she saw the sort of forlorn stare on
the girl's face that she recognized from her own experience, the
knowledge that a loved one wouldn't be around for something important.
Instinctively, she grimaced, knowing without looking that the gaze was
tracing directly at Neil. "But she's not going to get you," she
whispered to herself, stepping past Eiko as she spoke the final few
words, her mind whirling with ways to make sure that Eiko didn't pose
any threat to her.

]++[

The nutrient bath for EVA-02 had already been drained, and so the red
golem stood at its full height, unobscured by anything but the air as
the technicians scrambled about, fastening large gray armored plates to
various locations to ensure that the machine was protected against the
heat and pressure of the volcano. Standing inside the observation
booth, Ritsuko sipped a cup of coffee with mild disinterest, her job
primarily restricted to simply telling the workers when they'd attached
something incorrectly. "Ants," she muttered to herself, trying to
decide whether to smile or frown at the thought as the workers
scrambled about. "We're just ants next to the Evas."

Another armored plate began to flash sparks around the edge as it
attached itself to the existing armor of the Eva, and Ritsuko found
herself frowning at length, the comparison between ants and humans
feeling particularly apt. The expression on Niobe's face had been
painful to look at, painful to even recall. "We've trained the
Children to be soldiers," she muttered to herself, shaking her head at
the sudden bubbling guilt, knowing that she'd only done what was
necessary. "Enthusiasm like Niobe's is a good thing. It shows that
she's willing to do what she has to." Something at the back of her
head told Ritsuko that she was oversimplifying the issue, but she
ignored the thought, focusing instead on the Eva in the hangar,
watching as sparks flew from welders, human technology rising up to
meet the frailties of humanity.

Hearing the noise of the door into the observation room slide open, she
turned slowly, staring across the banks of computers towards the door
as Fuyutsuki stepped in, looking as though he was slightly embarassed
merely by his presence in the observation room. "Dr. Fuyutsuki,"
Ritsuko said flatly, offering a slight nod before turning back towards
the teal-gray hangar of the Eva unit. "You didn't need to stop by. I
have the situation entirely under control." She paused for a moment,
frowning. "Weren't you planning on leaving with the group for
Asamayama?"

"Other matters called," Fuyutsuki replied, sounding as though he were
still more than a little irritated from the conference earlier as he
stepped up besides Ritsuko, staring out over the Evangelion as it was
modified. An awkward silence hung in the air for a moment, then Kozou
opened his mouth, wanting to say one thing but knowing full well that
it wouldn't come out of his mouth. "Gendou's hoping to step up the
timetable on Ayanami again."

Ritsuko only nodded, apparently unconcerened by the new development, as
though she'd actually predicted it. Her normally rather stern
expression shifted ever so slightly into something closer to a frown as
she sipped her coffee, the only outward sign that she'd even heard
Fuyutsuki until she spoke again. "I'm not sure if that's fesable.
We've already accelerated the schedule far beyond what I'd consider
reasonable." She paused for a moment, knowing full well that Commander
Ikari knew the facts as well as she did. "The council suspects
something, don't they?"

"They'd hardly be keeping such a close eye on us if they didn't,"
replied Fuyutsuki flatly, his gaze softening somewhat as they avoided
the topic that seemed glaring in his eyes. Beneath the observation
deck, more sparks erupted from the Eva as an armor plate was welded
into place, the once-red machine now looking as though it were wearing
some kind of medieval armor. "They know that Gendou isn't going to
simply sit back and watch as they try to carry out their plans, but I
don't suspect they know any of the specifics about Ayanami. We did a
good job covering up for what occurred with Gehirn." He paused for a
moment. "Is there any way that we could accelerate the schedule?"

"I'll look into it," replied Ritsuko flatly, the vaguest twitch in one
of her eyebrows as she sipped her coffee once again, pausing for a
moment before she leaned towards the microphone nearby and began to
shout commands at the workers. Watching her, Kozou felt the vaguest
hint of guilt, as though he was deceiving the young woman simply by his
presence, that he should tell her everything that she needed to know.
"Is there anything else?" she asked at length, raising from the
microphone and turning towards Fuyutsuki.

"Yes," he muttered under his breath, feeling very much the part of the
fool, talking just softly enough so that Ritsuko couldn't hear him.
For a moment, he allowed his face to relax slightly, letting the
tension melt away to be replaced with sorrow, the knowledge that he was
only peripherally annoyed with the conduct of the Children feeling
numbingly obvious in his mind. Then he returned his expression to its
prior state, composing himself flawlessly before offering one final
glance down at the Eva. "Do your best, Dr. Akagi. Your mother always
did."

Ritsuko nodded as the older man stepped towards and out of the sliding
doors into the control room, her expression remaining blanlkly
professional as he walked away and as she turned back towards the Eva
unit. "Mother hated the Ayanami project, though," she whispered to
herself, feeling a sudden sense of dislocation as stared at EVA-02, as
though she were one of the technicians scrambling across the machine's
surface. "If she knew what I was doing, she'd probably hate me."
Staring at the Eva, Ritsuko waited for a moment to feel resentful of
the statement, but despite her expectations she felt nothing besides
the cold existence of fact. Shrugging, she took another sip of coffee,
the last few touches being put on the red golem in the hangar.

]++[

"This is a little cramped," muttered Eiko, glancing around the strictly
functional belly of the plane before stealing a quick glance out the
window. She'd rode in NERV's transport plane for the Evas, but this
was the first time that she'd had to use one of the personnel
transports, and she wasn't particularly taken by the accomodations.
Combined with the relative chill of the high altitude and the lack of
insulation compared to the skintight plugsuit she wore, it was proving
to be a relatively unpleasant mission so far. "If we're so important
to NERV, you'd think that they could afford slightly better planes."

Nieve, leaning against the back of her seat and apparently taking the
opportunity to enjoy the sweet nipping sensation of cold once again,
glanced over towards Eiko with a rather surprised expression on her
face. "You didn't know?" she asked, looking somewhat unsurprised by
Eiko's weak shake of her head. "NERV's been in a financial crisis for
a while now. They've only got a limited budget to begin with, but
operating six Eva units at once, combined with all the damage that the
city has incurred over the Angel battles... it's way beyond the ability
of the organization to pay." She shrugged, acting somewhat nonchalant
about the knowledge. "Misato bitches about it occasionally, but most
of my information I've picked up from Kaji. Part of his job is to make
sure that nobody's swiping money, and considering how tight NERV's
financial reserves are he's been doing that more than anything lately."

Eiko stared at the redhead for a moment longer, then glanced out the
window, examining the scenery below her while Nieve made a show of
seeming relaxed. In reality she was watching Eiko as closely as she
could manage through half-closed eyes, trying to get a better sense of
the girl. She understood why Eiko would be interested in Neil, but it
still made her uneasy, the thought that somebody else would try to take
him from her. Sighing, she tilted her head towards the still-silent
Niobe, the African girl looking particularly stoic as she sat perfectly
still in her yellow-brown plugsuit. "It's a shame that Neil couldn't
come," announced Eiko after a few moments more, sounding more forlorn
than her words would suggest. "He probably would have enjoyed the
landscape."

"Boy, you don't know Neil at all, do you?" asked Nieve, feeling a quick
tightness in her chest as Eiko turned towards her, wishing that the
other girl hadn't brought up Neil at all. "He's not into stuff like
that. He said so himself." She smirked, folding her arms across her
chest and feeling particularly secure in her assertion, glad that she
had more leverage over Eiko than she'd thought.

"I meant the view of Tokyo-3," Eiko said, sounding a little put off by
Nieve's words and gesturing out the window towards the gleaming white
city receding in the distance. "It's nice. It looks almost like the
first day we met, with the sun being bright enough to reflect off all
the buildings." Eiko smiled at the thought and pressed one of her
palms against the window while Nieve blushed a deep red, and Eiko
seemed to sense it a moment later, glancing back towards the other
girl. "Is something wrong?"

Nieve wanted to scream that there was indeed something wrong, that she
didn't want Eiko to take Neil from her, that Eiko had someone to hold
on to already, that it simply wasn't fair. But she knew that wouldn't
fix anything, and taking a deep breath she shook her head, closing her
eyes completely. "Not a thing," replied Nieve, doing her best to sound
as though there were truly nothing wrong. "You've just known Neil
longer than I have, but I thought that since I lived with him, I might
have a better idea of what he's like. Sorry."

Eiko nodded rather hesitantly, staring at Nieve a moment longer and
then turning her gaze towards Niobe. Niobe only gave a quick glance in
response, trying to remain focused even as she tried to alleviate the
sense that she was being given the task of a backup unit as a way to
keep her happy and cooperative instead of as an indication of her
abilitiy. Eiko continued to look at Niobe, and at length Niobe flashed
a quick smile, less out of actually being happy and more out of a
desire to get the girl to look away. "Why did you want to pilot your
unit so badly on this mission, anyways?" Eiko asked at length, drawing
Niobe's attention fully towards her.

"Piloting the Eva is what I do," she replied flatly, trying to take a
page from Ryo's book, knowing that she had to stay detached in order to
stay focused. She stared at the girl, beginning to wonder if perhaps
Eiko had some kind of affection for Neil, her brain immediately
figuring out how that would factor into her own situation. "I want to
get more practice with the machine in real combat, to get more
accustomed to its capabilities, how it moves, how it performs certain
functions." She added the fact that she needed to be better at
piloting it silently to herself, simply sinking her head slightly. "I
never seem to use it to its full potential."

"You don't trust it," offered Nieve, her tone sounding slightly harsh
to Niobe. The young girl's expression darkened, and she looked towards
Nieve to see that the girl wasn't trying to be condescending, a warm
smile on her face as she looked towards Niobe. "That's your problem.
I've seen it when you're in battle. You think that everything has to
run on a script, that you can't deviate from it. But you've got to
remember that you're in charge of the Eva, not the other way around."
She shrugged, the blush from before fading slowly from her cheeks.
"Sometimes, you just need to think about something for a second and
take control of it, because even if you don't make the right decisions,
at least you've got a handle on them. You've got to improvise."

Niobe couldn't tell, for a split second, whether she wanted to smack
herself or hug Nieve. The suggestion seemed so obvious, the clear
reason why Ryo didn't seem to be impressed with her, because she simply
didn't improvise enough. "Thank you," Niobe said softly, smiling at
the other girl, who offered a slight blush once again along with a
shrug. Nestling back in her seat, Niobe let her thoughts run wild,
knowing that she'd have to wait until she got into another Eva battle
before she could prove to Ryo that she was worth his attention.

]++[

It was a testament to the personnel who worked under NERV that what had
been a geological survey site hours earlier had become an emergency
command center for the operation in such a short time, at least in
Misato's eyes. She took a moment to survey the room, the gray
computers pressed up against every wall, screens wrapping around the
length of the walls to display even more information to the group than
Central Dogma's main screen. "This isn't so bad," she muttered to
herself, crossing her arms over her chest and tapping her foot against
the cold metal of the floor. "It's not the best facility we could be
using, but it's as close as we'll get on short notice.

Hearing the sound of the doorknob turning, Misato quickly turned her
gaze towards the brown door to see the three Children assigned to the
mission file in, Nieve first, followed closely by Niobe and Eiko.
"We're here," Nieve announced, ignoring the redundancy of her statement
as she came to a harsh stop and stood as straight as she could. "Have
our Evas arrived yet?"

"Before you did," replied Misato reaching over towards one of the
consoles and hitting a few buttons to bring up a display of the three
machines, all crouching slightly outside of the base. "The planes
dropped them off a little while ago. We're ready to insert the entry
plugs as soon as the last few preparations for the mission are
complete." She glanced back towards Nieve, noticing the look of
absolute horror on the girl's face. "What's wrong?"

Nieve said nothing immediately, only stepped towards the display and
stared at what she knew to be EVA-02, now covered thoroughly by gray
plates that seemed to break up every smooth line of the machine's
body. "My Eva," she whimpered, reaching over towards the screen and
touching it gingerly. Misato frowned, not sure if the girl was being
serious or just kidding around, hoping that it was the latter. Nieve
stared for another moment at the Eva, then buried her face in her
hands, shaking her head back and forth. "It was so young... so
beautiful... and now it's got ugly gray plates welded all over it, no
beauty whatsoever." She paused for a moment, then began wailing
loudly, almost sounding as though she were screaming.

Misato, no longer in any doubt as to the seriousness of the girl,
sighed and turned away from the girl as Nieve slammed her fist against
the top of the console, hitting it in mock melodrama for a moment
before standing up once again. Flashing a smile towards the other two
girls, both of whom looked utterly bewildered, Nieve turned her gaze
back towards the now-awkward EVA-02, with some curiosity. "It is
pretty ugly, though," she noted, folding one arm across her chest while
the other thumbed her chin. "Wasn't there anything more graceful
available?"

"You should have seen the prototypes for this," replied Misato with a
shrug, turning back towards all three Children with a mildly serious
expression on her face. "Trust me, we could have made your Eva look a
lot uglier than that."

"Thanks, I'll pass," replied Nieve somewhat sheepishly, taking a couple
steps back and nearly bumping straight into Eiko. She glanced back at
the other two Children, pleased to see that they were letting her do
the talking, then turned back towards Misato, folding her arms across
her own chest in almost a mirror of Misato's position except for the
very notable difference in proportions. "So we're going to recover the
Angel. Do we have a plan for this, or is that something we're going to
make up as we go along?"

Shooting Nieve a quick harsh stare, Misato pressed a few buttons on one
of other consoles, bringing up a wireframe dislay of the volcano
itself, complete with a flashing red dot that represented where the
Angel was supposed to be. "This is the last recorded depth of the
Angel," she announced, gesturing towards the obvious position. "We're
hoping that it's moved closer to the top of the volcano, but the safest
assumption is that it has remained stationary. We've already set up a
tether system for EVA-02 at the top of the volcano, so all that remains
is to lower it in, grab the Angel, then hoist it back out. That's
assuming that everything goes according to plan."

"And what if everything -doesn't- go according to plan?" asked Eiko,
trying to keep her voice as neutral as possible but knowing that the
slightest bit of implication had probably crept into her voice
anyways. Nieve snapped her head back and shot Eiko a glare, but Eiko
simply shrugged, hoping that the other girl would realize that she
hadn't meant it as a desirable scenario.

Misato didn't bat an eyelash, hitting another pair of buttons and
bringing up something that looked essentially like two gigantic
railroad tracks mounted on some kind of glove. "We've taken along a
pair of the technical division's prototype rail cannons for Eva usage,"
replied Misato, sounding as though she was a little nervous about the
weaponry. "That's where the backup units come in. Both rail guns have
a single piece of ammunition, and they should be able to propel it at
high enough speeds that the lava won't melt it. If you can't destroy
the Angel with that, we're planning on using them to fire in an N2
canister and detonate it once it reaches the Angel."

Nieve gulped, feeling a minor twinge of fear at the mention of the N2
canister, knowing full well what would happen to her machine if she
were grappling with the Angel when it went off. It was one thing when
the machine was on land, but beneath a sea of lava she didn't doubt for
an instant that the effects could be lethal. "So, am I just supposed
to hold onto the Angel's tail or something?" Nieve asked at length,
swallowing hard and reminding herself that she would keep the operation
under control.

"The technical division gave us a present to deal with that, too,"
replied Misato, drawing up another display, this of another awkward-
looking device that suspiciously resembled a gigantic letter "I."
"This is supposed to be an electrostatic containment cage. Once you
get to the Angel's position, Nieve, you'll use this to contain the
Angel until you return to the surface. We'll take care of restraining
the beast once you've done that." She paused for a moment. "Everybody
clear on what they're supposed to be doing?" A general nod seemed to
rippled through the three Children. "All right. Report to the
technicians downstairs, and they'll help you get your Evas started up."

All three girls filed out of the room, and Misato turned back towards
the display, listening only idly to the door close softly as she
brought up the model of the volcano once again, examining the depth.
She hadn't mentioned the fact that the Angel might have gone even
deeper into the volcano, largely because she hadn't wanted to consider
the fact, knowing that as it was EVA-02 was going to be hard-pressed to
withstand the heat and pressure of the magma flow. She frowned for a
moment, then her eyes went wide as she felt hands on her shoulders, a
familiar gesture that caused her to whirl around, smacking Kaji's hands
away. "Don't do that," she muttered, sounding angrier than she felt.

"Sorry," he offered, holding up a hand in protest and smirking at her.
She glanced over him quickly, noticing that he hadn't bothered getting
in uniform for the operation, still wearing his normal wrinkled and
untucked shirt with slightly dissheveled slacks. "I'd finished with
everything that I had to do around here, so I thought that I would stop
by. See how you were doing, how this new command post was treating
you." He paused for a moment, glancing around as though it were
another effort to make small talk. "It's a lot less... vertical than
Central Dogma. And no global map."

"We wouldn't -need- a map," replied Misato, turning away from him once
again and staring intently at the volcano map, trying to act as though
she were actually interested in it and knowing full well that Kaji knew
her attention was on him. "The entire operation's taking place in the
one location. It's superfluous." She paused for a moment, hoping that
he would say something, that she wouldn't have to give voice to the
thoughts in her head. Kaji remained silent, however, and after a
moment she sighed, turning halfway towards him. "You didn't come by
here to talk about the command center."

"No," Kaji confirmed, taking a step towards Misato, his voice serious
once again. Misato had always been slightly disturbed by that habit of
his, the ability to go from superficial to deathly grave in a moment.
"I came here to ask you something. You got to find out why I came to
NERV, it's only fair that I get to ask you my own question." He stared
into the woman's eyes as though he was waiting for a response, and at
length Misato nodded, still wondering exactly what he was trying to
do. Kaji coughed, then took a deep breath. "Why did you leave me?"

It was the last question that Misato had expected him to ask, and she
found herself blushing in spite of herself, recoiling slightly at the
directness of the question. She stared up at Kaji once again, as
though she was expecting him to retract the statement within a moment.
"I..." She paused for a moment, unsure of how to respond, then turned
away from him, staring down at the computer console that she had been
operating, avoiding his gaze intentionally. "I had told you that I
loved you, but you never said anything back. That was when I realized
that it wasn't true, that I'd lied to you." She closed her eyes,
dredging up memories that she didn't want. "I never really loved you,
Ryoji. I loved whay I thought you represented. That's why I left.
Because you deserved better."

An awkward pause hovered in the air for a moment, then Misato felt his
hand on her shoulder oncce again, as though he were trying to comfort
her despite what she'd said. The thought made her want to be sick, and
she shrugged her shoulder roughly, brushing the hand off and sending a
clear message. "Misato, I think that -"

"Just go," she said firmly, her voice devoid of emotion, not even the
slightest hint of sorrow at the edge of her words. Kaji hesitated for
a moment, but Misato could feel and hear that he'd taken a step
backwards, that he was doing what she'd told him. "I have work that I
need to do." There was another brief pause, then Misato heard the
noise of his shoes clicking across the floor, the slight creak in the
hinges of the door into the room cutting through the air as he opened
it, returning just momentarily as he shut the door behind him.

Misato continued to stare at the computer console for a moment, as
though she was terrified Kaji would still be there if she turned
around. "You lied," she muttered to herself after a minute, pushing
herself to her full height, feeling slightly wobbly on her feet despite
the fact that she'd been completely sober the entire day. Shaking her
head, she closed her eyes and took a deep breath, trying to feel
bettter about herself even as she reminded herself about what she had
done wrong. "You lied to him."

Hitting another few keys on the console in front of her, Misato tried
once again to focus on the map of the volcano, but her mind wouldn't
stop straying towards Kaji. She'd told him what she almost thought was
the truth, what she wanted to believe, but she knew that it wasn't
true, that she'd lied to him beyond a shadow of a doubt. And, even
though she couldn't explain it, it somehow felt like his fault, as
though he'd told her to lie to him for some strange reason. "Just like
dad," she muttered to herself, grabbing the nearest chair and flopping
down in it somewhat weakly, staring into nothingness forlornly.
"Everything about him... it's like dad."

Sighing, Misato leaned forward, resting her elbows on her knees and her
head in her hands, trying to understand her own emotions and finding it
more difficult than she'd expected. She wanted to hate Kaji for what
he was. The moment that she'd realized she was falling for someone so
much like her father, she'd wanted to hate him, and part of her did
hate him. But as she glanced towards the door out of the room, she
realized that she didn't truly hate him, not all of her and certainly
not with much enthusiasm. "It's all your fault, dad," she muttered,
wishing that the console technicians would arrive soon, that the
operation could begin and take her mind off personal matters.

]++[

Niobe hated to admit it, but Nieve was right about EVA-02 looking ugly,
especially at close proximity. It came into sight slowly, climbing up
the ridge to the mouth of the volcano with labored movements due in no
small part to the massive restrictions that the armor visibly imposed
upon it, the electrostatic cage for capturing the Angel dragging limply
behind it. The Eva looked for all the world as though it had fallen in
a particularly large pool of cement that had dried a bit too quickly,
and while she didn't doubt the functionality or the necessity of the
armor she couldn't help but feel a little reassured that her Eva hadn't
been chosen for the mission. "You look good, Nieve," she offered with
a slight smirk, hoping that the other girl would be willing to take the
joke.

"Quiet, you," hissed Nieve, sounding slightly less than angry but still
making it clear that she found nothing funny about her Eva's
appearance. Inside her cockpit, she could already feel the coolant
that was being pumped into the LCL, the slight chill to the liquid the
only visible benefit to the bulky and restrictive armor around her
machine. "So, I just jump in?" she asked, turning her attention
towards Misato as she stepped to the edge of the volcano's mouth,
orange-red magma bubbling within the circular mouth of brown stone. It
looked disturbingly similar to LCL, a thought that made Nieve cought
involuntarily.

Misato glanced towards Maya quickly, and the console technician paused
for a moment before flashing a thumb's-up, obviously unaccustomed to
the equipment she was working with. "That's right," Misato replied,
sighing at the fuzzy camera feed at the dive site, wishing that they
were back at Central Dogma already. "The power cord that's acting as
your tether will catch you about halfway down, and it'll lower you
gently the rest of the way. Try not to do anything particularly
reckless - it's capable of supporting your weight, but it is jury-
rigged, and it might be a little more unstable than we thought."

Glancing down towards the lava, Nieve swallowed hard, trying to remind
herself that as long as she maintained her concentration she could
control the situation. Closing her eyes, she moved her Eva forward,
taking four measured steps before she stepped off the edge of the
volcano and towards the center, the heat rushing up to meet her almost
instantly. Mercifully, it only felt like a warm breeze as it reached
up and struck her Eva, but she still felt a surge of terror as her
machine hurtled towards the magma, then lurched to a stop with a loud
noise of twisting metal. "What was that?" she shouted, knowing that
the tether wasn't supposed to make noises that sounded so fatal.

"Looks like one of the struts gave a little when you fell," replied
Misato, trying to sound as calm and reassuring as possible just as she
tried to feel as calm and reassured as possible. "That's better than
we'd expected. We had prepared for as many as seven struts giving
way." She was lying, but she was hoping that Nieve wouldn't pick up on
that fact. "It should be perfectly capable of holding your weight.
Besides, in the worst-case scenario, you've got your backup units to
pull you back out of the magma.

"Wow, lucky me," muttered Nieve, for the first time that she could
remember feeling distinctly uncomfortable in the cockpit of her Eva.
Sighing heavily, she forced herself to remain focused, gripping the
electrostatic cage firmly as the molten rock came up to meet her, the
similarity to LCL striking her more and more firmly and disturbing her
even more with every passing moment. "You don't think it's possible to
lower me any faster, do you? Get this over with?"

"Not safely," replied Misato, sensing the young girl's fear clearly
through the radio. She glanced over towards Makoto, who nodded a quick
confirmation of her statement, then turned her gaze towards the screen
showing the feed from the Eva's camera coming closer and closer to the
lava. "Don't worry. There's a hot spring near here, and I'll take all
you girls over afterwards. It'll be great."

"The last thing I'm going to want after diving through molten rock is
a -hot- spring," Nieve offered, angry that Misato was implying she
could be bought into complacency. She'd known Kaji to do the same
thing, but somehow it felt different with Misato. Feeling a rush of
heat as her Eva's feet touched the magma and sank into it, Nieve
gritted her teeth slightly before relaxing as the heat seeped into her
body without harm. She'd known, academically, that her Eva would be
all right, but the waiting had made it less tolerable. As the magma
slowly eveloped her machine, she frowned at the heat, but her fears
seemed far less near at hand as she sank through the red mass. "Are
you guys guiding me? I can barely see a thing."

"We've got your position up on our monitor," replied Misato,
alternating her gaze between the display from EVA-02's camera as it
descended and the small wireframe model of the volcano that was
tracking her position relative to that of the Angel. Staring for a
moment longer, she stepped over to Makoto's station, his fingers moving
across the keyboard with slightly more hesitation due to his
inexperience with the hardware at his disposal. "Any indication of how
close she is to the target?"

Makoto shrugged, gesturing towards the wireframe display somewhat
weakly. "There's not a lot that we can do until the machine comes
within visual range. NERV's detection systems don't reach out far
enough to pick out details like that." He tapped a few more keys,
checking the rate of descent for the Eva. "It'll be a few more minutes
at best, though. We'd better relax while we've got the chance."

On the surface, staring down into the magma, Niobe felt restless,
shifting the weight of her Eva slightly from foot to foot, trying to
get over her own fear of inactivity. She knew that her parents
wouldn't be impressed by her task as a sideliner, and she doubted that
it would do her any good with Ryo, either. "This is maddening," she
muttered through a private channel to Eiko, stepping over to the spot
next to the green steel crane that supported the tether line where the
rail guns awaited usage. "There's nothing for us to do but wait. We
might as well have stayed home."

"Calm down, Niobe," offered Eiko, apparently relaxed in her cockpit,
looking as though she still disliked the taste of LCL in her mouth but
otherwise looking fairly composed. "Nieve's got the situation under
control." She paused for a moment, her expression suddenly becoming
somewhat wistful and bitter. "It's probably just as well that Neil
isn't here. She'd just be flirting with him the whole time."

"You sound upset by that," noted Niobe, remembering the odd look that
the girl had shot towards Neil and the tone in her voice when she spoke
about him. "Don't you and Vash ever flirt with one another? You can't
expect that they'd do any differently."

"Well, yeah, but..." Eiko shook her head, turning her eyes away from
the private communication and looking somewhat upset by the question.
"There's nothing wrong with flirting, it's just that..." She trailed
off once again, as though she still hadn't figured out what it was that
she wanted to say. "I don't think that Neil particularly likes it. He
just doesn't seem like that kind of guy. Too moral." Eiko smirked at
her own words. "He's different, that boy. Nice."

Niobe frowned for a split second, turning her own gaze away from the
private communication display, the words making her suddenly feel even
more nervous about her prospects with Ryo. "I'm sure Vash would love
to hear about that," she noted after a moment, hearing Eiko make a
slight noise in response as Niobe cut off the transmission, already
feeling a minor twinge of guilt. She knew that she should have to use
tactics like that to get what she wanted, that her father had taught
her better than that, but she also knew that her father would have
wanted her to do her best no matter what the methods required, and she
forced the guilt from her mind.

In the command center, Misato gave a quick glance towards the wireframe
display of the volcano and Nieve's position, then turned back towards
Makoto's position. "Something's wrong," she noted, stepping over to
the younger man and staring at the display on his screen. "Nieve
should have the embryo within visual range by now. Could it have
matured already?"

The volcano's heat felt oppressive to Nieve as she continued to
descend, hearing Misato's voice only distantly as she strained her
vision to try and make out something that resembled the Angel. The
entire world around her seemed to be a blurring black and red, as
though nothing in the world existed besides those two colors, and the
longer she stared into nothingness the more certain she was that she
would never make out the Angel in such poor conditions. Then something
tickled at the edge of her vision, and she forced EVA-02's head
forward, struggling to make out the slowly-appearing shape. "Misato!"
she shouted, feeling overjoyed as she leaned further forward, seeing
something that she knew simply had to be the target. "I think I've
found it!"

Misato and Makoto exchanged quick glances, then Misato looked towards
the main screen to see what looked like an egg with a tail hovering in
the ocean of magma, coming ever closer to the Eva. "Looks like you did
it, Nieve," she announced gladly, giving a quick look in Makoto's
direction to confirm that the Angel's AT field was registering. "All
right. Your display should have target crosshairs now, directing you
on how you need to place the cage - it shouldn't be anything too
difficult."

"Of course not," replied Nieve, snapping her arms up and quickly moving
them into place, letting the cage hover a few feet away from the Angel
for a moment before it engaged. The I-shaped bar that she had been
holding generated what could only be described as an electrical box,
humming quickly shut as the Angel stirred ever so slightly. Nieve
paused for a moment, curious if it was going to struggle any further,
then breathed a sigh of relief. "The Eighth Angel is in my hands.
Let's get back to the surface, okay?"

Her tether tugged gently on her back, and Nieve felt a warmth of
satisfaction flood her body as she stared down at the still-undeveloped
Angel, pleased with her own control of the situation. The sweat slowly
beading off her body was mingling with the LCL and enhancing the
already nauseating taste of the liquid, but otherwise she felt quite
comfortable as the tether pulled her towards the surface, trusting that
it would hold until she reached the surface. "This was a pleasing
change," she noted, glancing down and seeing the proto-Angel moving
around slightly. "Hmm? Misato, the Angel looks like it's moving."

"You're certain? Hold on a second, I'll go check on it." Nieve made a
grunt of acknowledgement, then stared back down at the Angel, and her
eyes widened in horror. The thing was growing larger, thrashing
against the electrical walls of the cage, each hit expanding the wall
out further and further as the beast grew. "My God! Nieve, it's
waking up! Quickly, release the cage! Current objective is to destroy
the Angel!" Nieve had already dropped the cage when Misato's order had
came, and she stared in terror as the cage expanded for a moment
before breaking asunder, the Angel uncoiling itself and taking just a
moment to turn towards her before launching into motion.

Nieve's eyes could only barely make out details of the beast as it
turned towards her, a jumble of black shapes moving towards her with a
sudden aggressiveness, a speed that her Eva couldn't begin to match in
the sluggish lava. Forcing herself to remain calm, she popped open one
of her shoulder flanges, retrieving the prog knife from the flange just
as the Angel tore past her AT field without even wavering, claws and
teeth sinking into the surface of her armor. Nieve winced, then drove
the knife forward into the Angel, simply targeting the largest black
shape that presented itself to her.

The blade hit the Angel firmly, then twisted and snapped from the force
that Nieve put on it, leaving her with nothing but the handle to a prog
knife as the Angel backed off and then rushed at her once again. "My
prog knife can't even dent the thing!" she shouted, trying desperately
to move her Eva sideways as the thing slammed into her, then hurled her
aside towards the wall of the volcano. Bits of searing heat were
trickling across Nieve's skin, and as she slammed into the wall she
felt the Angel attacking without any hesitation. Then she heard a
terrifying hiss of static from the radio, and another blow from the
Angel sent her nearly into unconsciousness.

Above, in the command center, every gauge monitoring EVA-02 suddenly
snapped off as though it had never been there to begin with, as though
the Angel had found some kind of hidden switch and flipped it entirely
by accident. "We've lost the feed to Unit 02!" shouted Shigeru,
turning towards Misato from his seat across the room. "Communications,
vital monitors... nothing's responding! The Angel has cut her off!"

Misato shouted an order over the radio to Niobe and Eiko, but Niobe
already knew what it was going to be and had already set her machine
into motion, grabbing one of the railguns and tossing it towards Eiko,
then grabbing the other and slipping it onto her Eva's arm. Glancing
down, she saw two large metal spikes sitting in the same location, and
she picked up one somewhat gingerly, then rushed to the edge of the
lava, unsure of exactly how the weapon she was wielding worked even as
targeting crosshairs. "Misato? What should I do now?"

"Your targeting crosshairs are orienting themselves to the best
estimate of the Angel's position that we have. Pull the trigger on the
railgun for a second, then place the slug between the rails." Niobe
frowned at the instructions for a moment, but she waited for the
crosshairs to line up accordingly, then pulled down on the railgun's
trigger, expecting nothing to happen. To her surprise, the two long
rails began to crackle with electricity, and with a smirk she
remembered the way that the device was supposed to work as she slammed
the slug between the rails, letting it hover there for a moment before
releasing the trigger. Suspended by the magnetic field between the two
rails, the slug was suddenly propelled forward with incredible
velocity, splashing a pillar of magma upwards as it raced down towards
the Angel's position, Eiko's gun discharging almost immediately
afterwards.

Beneath the surface of the magma, Nieve pulled her Eva out of the wall
of the volcano, then glanced up to see the Angel heading for the
surface for only a second before the two rail gun shots zoomed past the
Angel and into the depths of the volcano. Then the irritating static
hiss died, and she could hear Misato shouting something, presumably to
Niobe and Eiko. "This is Nieve! Both shots missed the target!"
Staring upwards at the Angel, she felt the tether pulling her
vertically too slowly, and gritting her teeth she began to force her
Eva's limbs in a rythmic swimming patter, the bulky armor hindering the
motion but her acceleration still higher than the tether.

Staring at the display from EVA-02's camera, Misato looked towards
Makoto, who offered her a grave nod. "We're left without
alternatives. Eiko, you'll need to retrieve the N2 canister and shoot
it towards the Angel's location. If an Angel with armor this powerful
gets to the surface, we might not be able to stop it. Hopefully, Unit
02 will -"

"No!" shouted Niobe, staring down into the depths of the lava, trying
to figure out another way to defeat the Angel. She remembered Nieve's
words, remembered how she'd ached when Ryo hadn't looked at her, and
suddenly she sprang into motion once again, popping open the shoulder
flange over her right arm and retrieving the knife with her free left
hand. "There might be another way. Nieve, when you see the prog
knife, if you have any chance of hitting the Angel's core, do it!"

Misato screamed something over the radio to Niobe, but the young woman
ignored her as the target crosshairs lined up and she pulled the
trigger of the rail gun. She remembered the principle of the gun from
some the advanced studies her father had forced her to take at school,
that any metallic object would work as a slug without any need for
gunpowder. Gritting her teeth, she slammed the progressive knife
against the rails of the gun, then released the trigger, letting the
knife start spinning down into the depths of the volcano. "Please last
long enough," she whispered, feeling a growing sense of dread in her
gut.

Beneath the surface, Nieve's entire body seemed to be coated in warm
blood and sweat as the kicked viciously towards the surface, only
peripherally hearing Niobe's words as she struggled to catch up with
the black blob of an Angel. Then she saw another projectile coming
from above, and for a brief moment she wondered if the they'd already
sent down the N2 mine, a thought that filled her with a momentary
terror before the projectile tore into the back of the Angel. She
watched as the largest flat part of the beast was torn open by the
spinning blade of the prog knife, and her mind recalled Niobe's words
as she saw the blade snap off, the hilt rushing towards the depths of
the planet.

"Got it," she hissed, grabbing the small handle and pressing her thumb
against the almost unnoticable button towards the top, letting the
remainder of the broken blade eject while a new blade forcefully popped
up. Though the idea of having the blade being replacable had seemed
silly to Nieve at first, she had to admit that it seemed like a much
better idea than the alternative as she got a glimpse of the Angel's
core, thrusting her Eva's body up to meet the beast. Already the armor
over the core was knitting itself back together, but Nieve drove her
weapon towards the pulsing red orb without hesitation, letting the
knife break through the core forcefully. The Angel spasmed for a
moment, then the red light from the core faded as she forced the point
more deeply in.

"We're detecting nothing from the target," noted Makoto, the relief
obvious in his voice as the display from EVA-02's camera showed the now-
sinking Angel. "The Eighth Angel has been neutralized." He paused for
a moment, hitting the button to resume the tether's retraction almost
as an afterthought. "The commanders aren't going to be happy about
this."

"Then screw them," replied Misato bluntly, breathing a deep sigh of
relief. She knew that she had to have been willing to use the N2
canister, but despite that fact she still didn't feel sure that she
could have ordered the dvice's detonation, knowing that Nieve would
have probably been killed in the explosion. Pushing the thought out of
her brain as irrelevant, she leaned into the microphone of the jury-
rigged command center, the adrenaline of the situation slowly seeping
into a dull headache. "Good job, guys. I'm -definitely- taking you to
the hot springs now. You earned it."

]++[

Despite some rather noisy protests from Nieve, the hot springs had
turned out to be fairly enjoyable, although as soon as she learned that
you were expected to bathe naked Nieve proceeded to the deepest part of
the springs that she could stand in comfortably and refused to move.
The other girls and Misato didn't have the same problem, but aside from
a few minor disputes everything flowed smoothly afterwards, Nieve
extolling at length how her Eva would be restored to its crimson
livery. Then Niobe had remembered that there was something more that
she needed to do, and as soon as they had arrived at their chosen
restaurant of the night Niobe had taken it upon herself to use the
payphone outside, standing the the small glass booth while outside neon
lights flashed eagerly to all those who happened to be watching.

Another ring on the other end without any answer, and Niobe frowned
almost involuntarily, beginning to grow slightly worried as well as
slightly irate. She'd wanted an opportunity to talk to Ryo, to finally
get his attention, and she was more than willing to stand in a phone
booth that stank of liquor and urine to do so, but the thought of
having done so for nothing was more than a little disgusting. "Come
on, Ryo," she muttered, tapping her foot against the one spot of the
phone booth that didn't seem to have used gum stuck to it. "Pick up
the phone."

Sighing as yet another ring came, Niobe shook her head and was ready to
hang up the phone when she heard the unmistakable click of someone
picking up on the other end. "Hello?" asked Ryo's voice, and Niobe
smiled broadly, bringing the receiver back to her ear. "Who is this?"

"It's me. Niobe." She paused for a moment, expecting some sort of
recognition from the boy, then sighed and decided to simply move on.
"I'll probably be back late tonight, now that we've completed the
operation and everything. We're having dinner at a restaurant Misato
won't stop raving about, but it looks kind of seedy to me." Once
again, she received no answer from the other end, and she shook her
head, reminding herself that she needed to try harder. "What did you
have for dinner?"

"Food," the boy's voice replied flatly, sounding as disinterested as he
always did. "Were you successful in retrieving the Angel before it
emerged?"

"No," replied Niobe, leaning against the glass wall of the phone booth,
smiling despite herself. "It must have been further along in its
development than we thought - it broke out of the cage and disabled
Nieve." Letting the statement hang in the air for a moment for
dramatic effect, she took a deep breath, knowing that Ryo would have to
notice her after he heard the whole story. "We were assigned rail guns
from the technical division, but our first shots went wide. Misato was
going to use an N2 canister, except I thought faster and used my prog
knife as a projectile." She closed her eyes, waiting for Ryo to say
something. "Creative, right?"

The other end remained silent for a moment, and Niobe felt her smile
start to falter ever so slightly, still waiting for the sound of
approval from the boy on the other end. "I suppose," he said at
length, his statement not even sounding bored so much as unconcerned.
"Is Nieve all right?"

A small twitch went through Niobe's free hand at the question, and
Niobe could feel a red flush beginning to blossom across her cheeks.
"Yeah," she replied weakly, her hope swiftly waning, smile now more of
a joke than anything else. "She's fine. After I gave her the prog
knife, she destroyed the Angel."

"I appreciate that you let me know," replied Ryo, still sounding flatly
emotionless. An awkward silence hung in the air for a moment as Niobe
stood in the booth, struggling to control herself. "If you're back
before 10:30, I will probably be awake. Otherwise, I will see you
tomorrow morning."

"Yeah. Great. Bye." Niobe didn't wait to hear the boy's response,
hanging up the receiver on the hook gently, trying to compose herself
and having limited success. Her body shuddered slightly as she stared
at the phone for a moment, tears bubbling behind her eyes, simply
waiting for the right catalyst to burst. "I did everything right," she
muttered to herself, unsure if anger or sadness was growing within
her. "I did everything right. What else could I be doing wrong?"

Eyes shutting tightly as the tears began to flow, Niobe slammed her
fist into the glass wall of the phone booth, wishing that she had the
strength to break it, to feel the pain as a punishment for her
failure. She had failed, even though she didn't know it. It was the
only logical explanation for Ryo's continued ignorance of her in favor
of Nieve. "I'm doing something wrong," she choked, body shuddering in
time with the ragged breaths she drew, growing only more enraged with
herself as she cried. "I'm crying. I shouldn't cry. I must not
cry." Gritting her teeth, she forced the tears to a stop, taking a few
more breaths as her respiration returned to normal, feeling as though
she'd failed even worse because of her reaction.

Sliding the door to the phone booth open weakly, Niobe stumbled out,
the blinding lights of the city blurring into a montage of colors
against blackness with her still-drying tears. "Calm down, Niobe," she
muttered to herself, forcing her lungs to take slowly measured breaths,
eyes shut and shoulders moving with the breaths she took. "This is
just a problem. Just a challenge." She remembered the day that Joseph
had destroyed her belongings before, remembered that she'd felt she was
doing the right thing when she'd done the same herself. "I've got to
overcome it. I can overcome it."

The door to the restaurant pushed open with minimal effort, and Niobe
stepped quietly over to the table where the others sat, eyes focusing
on her. She knew that there were still tears fresh on her face, still
the slightest bits of red around her eyes from the crying, but she
refused to acknowledge them, instead simply picking up her menu and
bringing it up in front of her face. "Niobe, are you all right?" asked
Nieve, reaching over and trying to force down the menu.

Niobe placed the menu gently on the table, forcing a smile despite
herself. "I'm fine," she replied, trying to sound happy but winding up
sounding simply blank. "Just had an emotional conversation with my
parents over the phone." Pausing for a moment as she felt tears begin
to well once again, Niobe forced herself to control her emotions,
wondering only distantly why she'd chosen that excuse. "They said that
they're very proud of me."

Misato shot Niobe a look that made the girl wonder if she had convinced
the older woman, but if Misato suspected something she said nothing,
simply turning back to her menu as though nothing had happened. "Order
whatever you'd like, girls," she said, doing her best to sound generous
and smiling at the trio. "You worked hard. You earned it."

Staring at the menu before her, Niobe felt as though she'd earned
nothing, that she hardly deserved to partake in Misato's generosity.
If she'd done anything worthy of a reward, she knew that Ryo would have
taken notice of her, that he wouldn't be so fixated upon Nieve.
Closing her eyes for a second, she remembered standing in front of the
mirror and looking at herself. At the time, she'd been certain that
there was nothing wrong with her body, that she was perfectly healthy
and attractive. "But I could be wrong," she whispered to herself,
staring at the menu once again, looking over the entire thing for
something small. Folding it shut, she put it down on the able and
crossed her arms over it. "All right. I'm having the chicken salad."

A pause settled over the table, then Misato placed her menu down
beneath her elbow, leaning over towards Niobe with a somewhat secretive
expression on her face. "The chicken salad here isn't some huge dish,
Niobe," the elder woman whispered, apparently trying to keep Niobe from
looking as though she didn't know. "It's just a small bowl. About the
size of a bowl of cereal. It's an appetizer."

"I know," replied Niobe firmly, watching as Misato's eyes widened in
shock, feeling that the other girls were staring at her as well. She
managed to force another smile, hoping that she was being slightly more
convincing the second time around. "I had a big breakfast this morning
with Ryo. Just not that hungry right now. Besides, I told him to wait
up for me, so we'll probably have something more to eat then, anyways."

Eiko and Misato seemed to be satisfied with the excuse, but Niobe saw
that Nieve was still staring at her, an odd sort of concern in her eyes
as though the Irish girl was trying to figure out whether or not Niobe
was telling the truth simply from staring into the other girl's eyes.
"You're really not hungry?" she asked, waiting for Niobe to nod in
affirmation. "Even though we didn't get to have lunch?" Niobe
frowned, but nodded once again, not liking the direction that Nieve's
questions were taking. At length, Nieve picked up her menu once again,
glancing over the choices but keeping her menu angled just right to
keep staring at Niobe.

Under normal circumstances, Niobe would have been slightly disturbed by
the other girl continuing to stare at her, but she'd forced herself to
block those feeling out for the time being, focusing on trying to feel
good about herself. She'd done something good, one more thing right on
top of all the things that she'd done wrong over the course of the
day. Taking a deep breath, she turned away from Nieve, staring off
towards the waitresses, waiting for one of them to come for their
order. "I'll make myself prettier," she whispered to herself, keeping
her lips still enough so that Nieve wouldn't notice that she was
talking. "Then he'll notice me. Then I'll be successful."

]++[

Outro: Neon Epoch Evangelion is based off of -Shin Seiki Evangelion- by
GAINAX and company. It is not intended to be a straightforward fanfic,
but it is building off the work of others, and as such it is done with
the utmost respect for the original works and their authors.
Basically, even though this is an original work, it's based off the
work of others, and if you read this, you should go to see the original.

Special thanks to all of the real Children - you know who you are.

Extra special thanks to Joe Augulis for his consultation on the
Japanese portions of the story. He might not know much Japanese, but
that's more than I know.

Copyright 2002 Eliot Lefebvre.

NEXT EPISODE:
Somebody has to take the power.
Somebody has to take the chances.
Somebody has to take responsibility.
NEON EPOCH EVANGELION 11: AUTHORITY SONG
"Maybe I couldn't have done anything to stop him."

]++[

We only have a little time in our lives to waste. Make the most of it.
Electronic Transcendence Productions:
Producer of, um, stuff for an unspecified time-period.
Rants: