Woah

Woah! This is the first time I added Schwarz boys into the fic. Gonna make a fic based on Schwarz sometimes else ne? ^_^ Did you guys notice this is also the first fic that I put many foul words in it? ^^; I am not used to it so please bear with me, ne? *hugs* Still, comments in any ways are accepted with both hands!

Warnings: Foul words, shounen-ai

Spoilers: None

Disclaimer: Weiß doesn't belong to me, it belongs to Koyasu Takehito, Kyoko Tsuchiya and Project Weiß.

Wrong Way

Part 2: Long Hair and a Tomato Juice

Kisaragi Yuu

"Brad"

"No."

"Aww Brad~"

"No."

"Braaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaddddd"

"I said no."

"Awwwww Braddiekiiiiiiiiiiiiiins"

"Dammit Schuldich!! I said NO!"

"Humph! Fine!" the German folded his arms, pouting. Sometimes his American leader really could spoil the mood on getting a vacation. Irritated, the German send a vision of... something unpleasant to the black-haired American.

"Schuldich!!" Braddiekins... I mean, Bradley-chan... ahem, or he might preferred to be called Crawford, growled at his German lover who kept pouting and sending him more and more of unpleasant images into the American's mind.

"Schuldich! You know how much I *despise* to see porn girls!! I'm gay dammit!!!"

"And why do you think I send those porn girls images to you, lover? Or may I say, EX-lover?"

"I don't think I'll be the first who'll come running for sex in our room this night..." Crawford stated, trying hard not to smile. The German pouted more, knowing the best that he, of course, be the one who will start to search the whole damned exclusive apartment to find his American man to make some lovin' first.

"Aww c'mon Braddiekins! It's just a vacation! And on the beach too~! My skin is getting paler and paler everyday, in a month you will never can recognize me with that Fujimiya Weiß scum!!"

Brad thought for awhile, soon he smiled and patted Schu. "That would be good then. We can sneak you into Weiß and get them killed while I handle with these bloody paper works."

Schuldich grunted. His lover's mind has nothing else than killing Weiß and their own boss, who's fully armed with a stick golf named Takatori, sweet jeeves... "You are so cold! Just a blasted normal vacation!! And Nagi needs it too!"

The young man which name was mentioned looked up from the book he was reading. "I do?"

"Yes you do! Well, but that's another story if you want to stay here and just read that... that..."

The American continued, "Philosophy Guiding Book, for mad people who lives with mad people"

"Yeah, THAT!" he paused, registering the title, "NANI??! What do you mean by learning some..."

"Philosophy, you could never say it right..."

"Yeah, silosofi! You wanna be a... a..."

"Psychiatrist"

"Umm... yeah, psy... psy... *that*!"

Nagi sighed, closing his book.

"Yeah, maybe Schu's right. I need a vacation, away from all of this." /away from YOU Schu./

::meanie brat! I heard that!:: "See?? Brad! C'mon!! Onegai??"

The American sighed, brushing a hand to his temple. Sometimes his German lover... no, make it to everytime, his German lover really push his own will without thinking about what the others think. But... oh well, maybe he's right. Crawford also needs some vacation to forget about everything, to forget about the fact that he's working with a bunch of orangutans.

He sighed more, looking at the expecting German.

"Fine, we will go Schu. Go pack up, tomorrow I will take you there or anywhere you want"

"Aww Braddiekins!!! You are one so sweet lover!" he jumped, glomping the American to slight suffocation. Then he busted to his room (which happens to be Brad's too) and started to pack things. The leader of Schwarz looked at the Japanese boy who sighed too and went to his own room. Brad brushed his temple.

Seeing the way this vacation was going to be like, he sighed.

"This is going to be a hell looooooooong vacation..."

***

Now is seen the 4 baddie guys sitting on the some kind of red Ferrari with Brad on the wheel, Schuldich beside him, and on the back were Farfarello and Nagi.

Schuldich was putting a hand on his cheek, a sign that he's bored, his everlasting smile faded soon after he settled in the car seat for about 10 minutes. Brad's butt getting cramped as they were already steering for almost 3 hours now, while Nagi kept his headphone on and loud and Farfarello kept licking his knife.

"Ne Braaaaaaad are we there yet??"

That, of course, came from a certain redhead German.

"Record." The youngest lad stated.

"EH??" the German looked back, to find pair of dark ocean emerald eyes belongs to Nagi stared back at him.

"Record," he repeated himself, "You can keep quiet for 15 minutes, that's the longest record."

Schuldich pouted. "Very funny, brat."

Brad smiled at the little joke that Nagi made, along with the German. He didn't know whether the smile he's putting on was a sign that he's entertained by the joke, or irritated by it. He chose not to know either. Soon, Schuldich was getting VERY bored, so he played with his hair... and soon end up playing with Brad's hair.

Brad glared at him, "Schu, I am driving."

"So what?" he smiled teasingly to his American lover as he whispered sexily, "You can drive AND play with me, can't you?"

Brad sighed, "No I can't Schu, I am driving. You won't go to the beach if you attract me and make me lost the way to the beach."

Schuldich pouted more, he crossed his arms again, and sound of 'Mayfly' song was heard. He peeped back to the backseat.

"Nagibrat, gimme that headphone of yours."

Nagi raised an eyebrow at the German, the two looked at each other, silently registering a war in their minds.

/Ask for it, say 'please'/

::Very funny, gimme that headphone, now::

/You don't scare me, Schu/

::Who wants to scare you for Christ's sake, just gimme that headphone or I will start whining again::

/That also doesn't scare me, nice try by the way/

::Why of course... wait! What do you mean by that?! Am I some whiney bitch who uses his whines to get what he wants??!::

/Oh... another record of the day: Schuldich *FINALLY* found out that he's a whiney bitch who uses his whines to get what he wants, and it took him 3 minutes to notice what I meant and 4 years to know that he's a whiney bitch/

"BRAT!!"

That one, and again of course, came from a certain redhead German. Brad had to think about something else like pretending he didn't see this one coming, or like... maybe chopping everybody's head off just to make them shut up, or a certain *he* shut up. If it doesn't work, let his own head be the first choice.

"Braddiekins, Nagi called me a whiney bitch who uses his whines to get what he wants!"

Brad sighed a loooong sigh as he kept steering, didn't look back but asked, "Did you Nagi?"

Nagi lower the volume on his headphone, "Schuldich is a whiney bitch who uses his whines to get what he wants, I said it now, again. Satisfied?" after that he increased the volume back. Schuldich glared daggers to him.

"See?? Ground him! Punish him! Whatever!"

Brad sighed more, wondering why in the hell he had to work with these morons. "You are grounded when we got back Nagi. A week."

Schuldich looked to Nagi teasingly, Nagi didn't look at him. Instead he used his power to throw the juice Farfarello was licking along with his knife who was saying that tomato juice and a knife tasted like hurting God (although he had NO idea what hurting God tastes, and he didn't has to be a smart ass to know, hurting God does not tastes like strawberries), to Schuldich's praised hair.

Schuldich screeched.

"Ow FUCK! NAGI!!! My precious hair!!"

Brad tightened his grip on the steer, trying very, VERY hard not to commit suicide.

"Boku wa hen da..." Nagi sang, looking outside the window. Farfarello stared at Schuldich's hair that piled with red tomato juice, he pondered on it for a few minutes before grabbed the gracious (??) hair of Schuldich's and pulled it.

"YOWCH!! Don't pull my hair, sicko Irishman!!! Let it go! Let it go!"

Nagi grinned silently, knowing the best that Farfarello always pulled everything that's long and reddish (???), it's just that Schuldich's hair is kinda orange-coloured, and now by the tomato juice, his hair even more looked red. And it qualified just fine for Farfarello to grasp it.

"Schuldich's long red blooded hair hurts God..."

Farfarello grinned as he pulled it even more, making the German to scream and shouted and whined and babbled. Brad really wished he were in his solemn office with his beloved thousand packets of paper at once. At least those packets won't scream and shout and whine and babble in the same time like the German did.

"LET IT GO DAMMIT!!"

"Your scream hurts God even more."

"Yes, whiney bitch's screams do hurt God a hell lot."

"BRATS! Shuddap!!"

"Could you all please shut up...?"

The last question mark was spitted out by Schwarz's leader, of course.

"It hurts for Christ's sake!! Let it GO!!!"

"It hurts Christ? Cool!" Farfarello demanded as he pulled the poor strands harder, making Schuldich to cry out in pain again, while in the same time babbling some German swears.

Nagi started to think on signing Schuldich up in the World's Guinness Book of the Record for the only man in the world who can scream and shout in Japanese, while murmuring swears in German.

"Baka, that only make Farfarello gets more and more excited."

"You have no right to call me a baka, since you are the one who planned this up!! BRATBRATBRAT!!"

"Psychiatrist."

"NANI??!" Schuldich raised his eyebrow high at the youngest Schwarz reply.

"If you can say that right, I won't call you a baka whiney bitch again."

Schuldich growled mentally and physically at the brunette, "You fucking damned BRAT!! And let me go in God's name, Farfarello!!"

"It hurts God even more."

"BRA~DDD!!!!!!!"

Brad tightened his grip on the steer wheel, thinking about wishing how much he hoped Schuldich didn't call him, and wondering how he can kill himself.

"WHAT NOW??!"

"Farfarello and Nagi are teaming up torturing me!!" Schuldich stated... no, make it to he shouted it.

"More like torturing God!" Farfarello stated excitedly.

"More like he's torturing himself." Nagi stated calmly.

Brad PLANNED on killing himself, didn't care any kind of ways, as long as it can kill him and send him faaar away from these moronic gorillas. "Farfarello, let Schuldich's hair go."

"No it hurts God badly."

"Yes, it hurts God so much. And it also hurts our baka whiney bitch, Schuldich."

"NAGI!! You fucked brat!!"

"Psychiatrist, Schu, psychiatrist."

"Psychiatrist." Farfarello replied, grinning at the German and the Japanese. Nagi smirked, "Farfarello the madman can say it, you can't?"

"BRADDDD!!!!!!!!!!"

"Psychiatrist, I said it in Schuldich's name. Now will you guys stop teasing him, so we can have a free-whine travel and let me drive in PEACE?"

Both the Irish and the Japanese chorused, "Schuldich couldn't say 'Psychiatrist'!" with the brunette added, "And why am I not surprised?"

Schuldich threw them a VERY dark look, sending them both an image of the two being killed by him. Specialized in Farfarello, Schuldich sent him a holy picture of smiling angel, it made Farfarello screamed though.

Brad whispered under his breath: Suicidesuicidesuicide

Schuldich started to whine more and soon burst out, "LET ME GO, FARFARELLO!!"

"No it hurts God."

"Yes it hurts God baaaaaadly."

"Shuddap..."

The last state came from the leader (need me to say it?), but needless to say, his moron teammates ignored him, already entertained (okay so two of them were entertained) by the problem of Schuldich's gracious (??) hair.

"NO! It made God happy!"

"It did?"

"No, he's lying."

"No I'm not!!"

"Morons... shuddap or I'll..."

And again, that small whisper came from a certain leader. But what to say, his teammates for the nth times ignored him.

"Let that hair go!! You will ruin the routine care I did on it for months!!"

"That even hurts God!" Farfarello laughed happily.

"Routine care?" Nagi smirked, imagining Schuldich on the bathroom using many kinds of hair treatment lotions on his hair, adoring his own reflection on the mirror, along with his long reddish orange strands. He smirked more.

"That isn't funny!!"

"Shut. Up."

"Yes it is." Nagi stated calmly, smirking crazily. Farfarello laughed with no particular reason, considering that he's a madman.

"No, it IS NOT!"

"Yes, it IS!"

"IS NOT!"

"IT IS!"

"BRAT!!"

"Baka whiney bitch."

"BRATBRATBRAT!!!"

"Bitchbitchbitch."

"BRAAAAAAAD!!!!!"

And when the last scream registered in Brad's ears, all damned common sense (and patience) have been lost.

He turned the wheel violently, making the poor car to screech as the three members (okay particularly, one of them) screamed hysterically. The car spun round and round, many sounds of children cry heard and blood spilled were seen. (Fine, forget about the last sentence, this crazy author is trying to make it sounds poetic, humor her!)

"BRAD!!!! STOP THE FUCKING CAR!!!"

"Crawford... we are too young to die..."

"If we are dead we can see God, and that means I can hurt Him!! Yes Brad, do it!!"

"BRAAAAAAAAD!!!!!!!!!"

"Crawford..."

"Brad! Keep on!!"

Brad took some breath... "STOP CALLING MY NAME AND SHUT THE HOLY FUCKING HELL UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

*That* made his moron teammates shut up, AND the car to stop spinning. Brad panted a bit when soon he replied himself, "Shut the holy fucking hell up or I will kill myself and damn the vacation we are going to go through to hell."

After the whole crazy incidents on calling each other bitch and brat, the rest of the trip was quiet.

It's just that maybe the paper-loving (????) American named Bradley Crawford was too busy in thinking why in the hell he had to work with these crazy, lunatics, idiots, and not to forget to mention, moronic teammates (or slaves for Crawford), and busy too in wondering how he can kill himself while in the same time, killing his idiot pet monkeys (yes they are Schuldich, Nagi and Farfarello), until he didn't notice that he took a wrong highway.

When the heavenly solemn place named beach is on the left highway, Brad took the right highway (of course, in coincidence). And on the small green direction that planted on the highway that Brad took was written:

FUJI MOUNTAIN - 180 KM

***

~part two owari^^;

Whoa, you keep reading?? O.O You are TOUGH!! Well what happen in the next? Just find out later in the third part! *hugs* Now, comments onegaaaaaaaaai??? *chibi eyes* 0_0