More Harry Potter Limericks-

Requested through reviews

Author: Me, well technically the keyboard wrote it…but it was my idea and my (rather crude) imagination that came up with it…yay me!

Title: More Harry Potter Limericks- Requested through reviews

Disclaimer: Don't have to do another one! (Pulls tongues at JK and moons lawyers) BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! (Goes insane and smashes thing up) I can pretend to own SNAPE! SNAPE I TELL YA! (Gets shot in the neck with a tranquilliser dart) ohhhhhhhhhhh…down I go (Collapses into unconscious mass and is carried off in a straight-jacket)

Authors Note: (After regaining consciousness) Basically this is more limericks (Looks around suspiciously and rubs neck) Stupid frikkin darts. I wrote these pieces of weirdness because people requested them…to be honest I can't believe people like the original ones as a lot of guys and gurls I know think my mind is warped. So, if you reviewed thanks a bunch and this is for you (Big Grin) Ouch (Is shot by another dart) This is taking the piss, I was being sane, you fucking moronsssssssssssssss…(Collapses again)

Fred & George-

"They enjoy playing practical jokes

 'Cos they're great and hilarious blokes

 But what you don't know

 Is they enjoy a good blow

 On some fat Jamaican grass smokes"

(For all you innocent –cough- naïve –cough- people, the 'fat Jamaican grass smokes' = spliffs…weed…pot…happy grass etc)

Ginny Weasley-

"It's well known she fancies Potter

 One smile is enough to besot her

 With her long red hair

 Her heart flutters in the air

 In a trap of lust he's got her"

(A/N: GOD THAT WAS GAY! I don't like this…I'll try and think up another…sorry!) 

Dobby the House Elf-

"He pretends to enjoy peoples socks

 But really he's into guys Jocks*

 He gets high off a sniff

 Loves a good whiff

 Dobby's obsessed with men's cocks"

(Jocks*= Jockstraps…if you don't know what it means, look it up –tosses you a dictionary-)

Alastor Moody aka Mad Eye Moody-

"He's getting paranoid in his old age

 People say he ought to be in a cage

 He likes to turn Malfoy

 To ferret from boy

 Whenever he gets in a rage"

(A/N: Moody is one of my favourites, but in the original limericks I couldn't think of a poem that would do him justice…the ferret moment is bloody hilarious, the best moment of the goblet of fire)

Moaning Myrtle-

"Never known enough to be missed

 I doubt she's ever been kissed

 I know that she's dead

 Countless tears she does shed

 But she's sleeping where people have pissed"

Crabbe and Goyle-

"If Hogwarts ran outta food they'd throw fits

 They probably have enormous man tits

 They are Draco Malfoy's henchmen

 Slim fast couldn't help them

 'Cos they're a couple of stupid dip shits"

Percy Weasley-

"Percy Weasley has never been a slouch

 Has enormous respect for Barty Crouch

 He likes to constantly moan

 Makes his opinion well known

 Does he know he's a boring old grouch?"

Neville Longbottom-

"He's always been dim and slow

 So in Potions Snape makes a show

 Not the sharpest knife in the draw

 But he's definitely not a bore

 Neville Longbottom's a secret man-hoe"

Peter Pettigrew aka Wormtail-

"Once a friend of Lupin, Potter and Black

 But he chose to turn his back

 He was supposed to be their mate

 What he did makes me irate

 I wish I could cut off his sack!"

(Sack= Scrotum…muwahahahahahahahahahaha! Reproduce now, bastard!)

Authors Note: Once again, this is the end…it'd be much appreciated if you reviewed…and if you don't I'll burn down Hogwarts and kill everyone! (Evil Grin) Except Snape of course, I'll warn him! So review dammit, don't be lazy, it's on your way out! (Dart is fired but Johnny manages to dodge it) Right you Shitbag (Chases guy who fired dart and shoves it up his ass) hehe!

Oh yeah, any more requests just ask, and I'll do them!

REVIEW!!! Follow the arrow!

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