From the hallway, Chandler handed a messy pile of clothes inside to Joey. "Just put this in my old room. I'll sort it out later."

"Okay." Joey did so, then returned to see Chandler coming into the apartment with the white dog statue, which up until recently been living on the balcony outside Monica and Chandler's apartment.

"The big white dog!" Joey exclaimed, as he helped pull the dog inside. "Oh, what happened to him?" He noticed that the dog's tail had broken off.

"Yeah, um, I guess Monica threw him into the hallway a little hard."

"Aw, we're gonna have to fix this. I might have some glue that will work. Wait a sec."

Chandler pulled the statue into the living room while Joey rummaged around, still holding the broken tail.

Chandler smiled and spoke jokingly to the dog, "Now if you behave, you don't have to live outside anymore."

Joey came back with a tube of adhesive. "I think this will work."

"Be careful," Chandler warned, "you don't want to get your fingers stuck to anything."

Joey was careful as he reattached the tail to the dog, but he did forget something. "Hmm, I don't have anything to clamp it until the glue sets. I guess I'll just hold it."

"How long?" Chandler asked, reading the label. "It's gonna be a few hours. Hold on and I'll see if we can prop it against something." He looked around for anything they could use, like a table or hockey stick or stool, but nothing seemed to be the right height or angle to keep the tail in place. "Let me know if your arm gets tired, Joe. I can take over while you look."

"Okay." As Joey sat there, getting a bit bored, he started to reminisce aloud. "Hey, Chandler, remember when we got him?" He referred to the dog. "Actually, I got him, and brought him here after I got fired from *Days of Our Lives*."

"Yeah. Ross bought him for you, when your stuff got repossessed."

Joey nodded. "Remember when we named him?"

"Well *you* named him Pat the dog. I thought he was more of an Oliver."

Joey rolled his eyes. This was why they reverted back to "the big white dog". Without thinking, Joey continued, "Remember when you moved out and I gave him to you?"

There was an awkward silence, and Chandler abandoned his search. He turned and saw Joey's smile turn to pain at the bittersweet memory of sleeping with Chandler one last time (or so he thought) only to watch him move in with Monica in the morning. And of course, with that memory, other memories came back of other stolen nights and other mornings where they pretended that nothing had happened.

Contrary to what the guys had told Monica today in asking for her forgiveness, their first affair years ago had not been that casual, nor devoid of real feelings.

Chandler bit his lip. He should have known that their reunion earlier today had been too easy. He and Joey had avoided bringing up the past all day, wanting to just focus on being back together, but the past could not be escaped.

Joey stared at the ground and looked hurt. "You left me. You always leave me."

Chandler frowned with guilt. "I know," he said softly, "but not anymore. I, um... It was all a mistake, a terrible mistake. If I could take it back--"

"You can't," Joey interrupted. He swallowed and shook his head. "And you didn't, you didn't even love her."

In some ways, that hurt more. It was one thing for Joey to always step aside when he thought that Chandler really loved Monica and she was his soul mate, but if none of that was true, then why had Joey suffered for so long? Why did Chandler keep using him and leaving him? Suddenly Joey wasn't jilted for a greater love in Chandler's life; he was just plain jilted.

"Joey... I didn't know. I didn't realize how much you meant to me."

That explanation didn't comfort Joey at all. Why *didn't* Chandler know? Why did it take an argument with his wife to make him see?

"I'm sorry," Chandler said helplessly. With a sigh, he came over and rubbed Joey's shoulder tenderly, whispering, "I'm here now, you know? I'm back for good."

Joey nodded, but how reassuring was that, really? Chandler was back because his wife caught him cheating and was divorcing him. How touching!

Chandler tried to hug him close. "I love you."

Joey pulled away from him. "That's what you said to her." He winced and got up, dropping the tail on the rug and starting to pace around. "You say you love me now, but you were telling her just today that we were nothing." He looked disgusted with himself. "You even had me doing it too, just 'cause I didn't want to hurt her more. I mean, what was I doing? 'Yeah, Mon, he really loves you, so you take him back real quick, so he'll forget all about me again.'" He shook his head and scoffed. "Ross and Rachel, huh? Yeah, we're just as screwed up as them right now!"

Chandler stared at him and didn't know how to answer. Everything Joey said was true.

"I mean," Joey was choking up, "one minute I'm trying to be all happy for you--your marriage, your trying for a baby--all of it, and the next minute, you come waltzing in here and want another bonus night. I mean, what the hell do you want from me?!"

"Joey, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry."

"Sorry!" He swallowed and sank onto the couch, fighting the urge to cry. He wanted to stay macho and angry, but he couldn't help hurting so bad. He asked Chandler, "Why are you back here, huh? 'Cause I'm your second choice, the one you fall back on? I'm here. I'm always here when you need me. That's why you come, isn't it?"

Chandler tried desperately to mend things. "I've been an idiot. I've been a stupid, stupid bastard!" He came over and knelt in front of Joey. "But I can make it better now. I'll treat you right."

Joey was skeptical. "I mean, how do I know you're not gonna go back to her if she suddenly changes her mind and forgives you?"

"I won't, Joe. I won't! It's over with her."

"Over!" Joey snorted.

Chandler knew he deserved that. He had told Joey that it was over between him and Joey after London, but he kept coming back for all those bonus nights. Could anything he said be trusted?

The more Joey thought about it, the more disillusioned he became. "What if Monica hadn't come home early and found us? What if she hadn't said all that stuff about us? I mean, you said that this was gonna be the last time, *again*. Were you just gonna go back to her tomorrow and leave me hanging for another couple of years?"

God, why did Joey have to be so right? What could Chandler possibly say? "Joey, I'm sorry!" he repeated, pleading for forgiveness. "I was blind! I--Oh my God, the way I've treated you! I'm so, so, sorry."

The apologies sounded hollow to Joey, especially after Chandler had recently said similar things to Monica. Joey shook his head and pulled away when Chandler tried to hold him. "Maybe we should have just stayed friends." He got up and ran into his bedroom.

"Joey!" Chandler followed him but was too late. "Joey!" he leaned on the locked door and knocked urgently. "Joey, please."

No answer.

"How--how do I make it up to you? What do I say? I didn't know what you really meant to me. I thought we were the crush and she was--" He sank miserably to the floor. "I was wrong, so very wrong. I'll do anything you want, Joe, anything. We can start fresh, huh? I'll move with you far away. I'll never mention her name again. I'll throw out anything she ever gave me. Just tell me what to do."

Chandler grew more anxious with each passing second. "Why--why do you think I stayed home from her chef's trip, Joe? Why do you think I asked you for a bonus night without any real reason? I needed you. It was so long since you last kissed me or touched me. So what if she didn't find us out today? We didn't need her to find us, Joe! We don't--" He swallowed and sighed. "I mean, I've been dreaming about you lately. I even, I even realized that it was gonna be our anniversary soon. Ours, Joe. Do you remember? I would've known without her. I would've seen the truth myself. Please believe me. All she did was make it sooner instead of later."

Still nothing.

"Please," he begged. "Remember, remember the first night?"

Joey finally answered, his voice strained, "You were, you were drunk then."

"Not that drunk. Not half as drunk as I was when I kissed everybody at your birthday party. I kissed Ross then, and I've kissed guys in bars by mistake, but I never, never slept with one by mistake. We weren't," he shook his head, "we were never a mistake."

They both thought back to that first night, years ago. Joey finally opened the door and let Chandler in. They kissed and held each other tight.