Hey all! I am SO VERY SORRY that this chapter took so damn long, but even after I had written it my disk did a suicide and I had to write it all again!

Thanks to the following people for your reviews: silverwolv20, holly88, lilyengraved, Dynast's Girl, fetch, SugarQuill, HarvestingEvil, the infamous drunk, Helen, Deity, Sweetpea, Kiki, (the first anonymous reviewer), Sally MacDarwin, arwenstar, (the other anonymous reviewer), Artistique Conglation, Chocolate Muse, loulou and procyon.

Here we go!





ALBUS: Yes, we're back, and we're about to see is Severus Snape washes his hair. Everyone watched him in expectant silence.

SEVERUS: I, er, well, you see, I....

LUCIUS: Spit it out, Sev!

DANIEL: Yeah, we all want to know!

PETER: But you three share the same dorm room as him. Wouldn't you know?

DAMIEN: (Shakes head) Nah, we're as clueless as you when it comes to Sev's hair.

SEVERUS: Hey! I just realized something! I can say dare, can't I?!?!

JAMES: Bugger, I was hoping that you wouldn't pick up on that. Yes, you can.

SEVERUS: In that case, Black, dare away.

SIRIUS: I dare you to...(looks around for inspiration and sees Lucius kissing Narcissa) Kiss James!!!

JAMES: WHAT????? Sirius, are you insane??? Don't I have to agree to that???

LILY: (Laughs) Aw, poor James. Sorry, if Snape is going through with it, you have to let him.

JAMES: I hate you Sirius.

SIRIUS: I know.

JAMES: Good.

SEVERUS: I have to kiss Potter???

SIRIUS: Either that or tell us all your dirty hair secrets.

SEVERUS: Fine! (Goes over and kisses James) Happy, Black?

SIRIUS: (Pouts) No...

JAMES: (Is vomiting in the bin in the corner) Me either. (continues to vomit)

SEVERUS: (Spits in other bin repetitively) Man am I glad there are too bins in this classroom. (Glances over at James vomiting, and throws up himself)

LILY: (Makes a face) Me too.

ALBUS: Both James and Severus eventually stopped emptying their stomachs into the bins and returned to the game.

SEVERUS: I get to ask someone now, don't I?

NARCISSA: Yes.

SEVERUS: In that case, Remus?

REMUS: (snore)

SEVERUS: Remus J Lupin! Wake up!!!

REMUS: What? I wasn't asleep!

PETER: Yes you were, Remus.

REMUS: Oh. Oops. What did I miss?

SEVERUS: I'm going to ask you a question that I'm sure you've all wanted to know the answer to at one time.

REMUS: (Nervously) This isn't about the Potion's Lab exploding, is it?

SEVERUS: No, we all know you did that.

REMUS: But -

SEVERUS: Shut up and let me ask the damn question!!!

REMUS: Eeep! Yes boss!

SEVERUS: What the heck does the 'J' stand for?

REMUS: (Even more nervous) What 'J'?

SEVERUS: Remus, what is your middle name?

REMUS: Dare!

SEVERUS: I doubt that's it!

SIRIUS: You idiot Snape! He wants you to dare him instead of answering!

PETER: And you did it, so don't complain!

SEVERUS: I want complaining! I didn't say a word!

REMUS: So then, Severus, a dare?

SEVERUS: I was getting to that. I dare you to eat a rat's eyeball.

PETER: Ew!

REMUS: I have to be able to do it now you idiot!

LILY: And there aren't any rats in here!

MARAUDERS: (Snigger)

LILY: What? What did I say??

PETER: Nothing.

SIRIUS: Nothing at all.

JAMES: Seriously!

SIRIUS: But I'm Sirius!

REMUS: (Holds hand out to Peter, who groans and hands over five Galleons) Thank you.

PETER: Rule number one of the 'Being Friends With Remus J Lupin handbook, never bet against him! (Rolls eyes at his own stupidity)

REMUS: Sev, get on with a dare!

SEVERUS: Fine then! Kiss the bottom of Damien's shoes, remembering that he just had Care of Magical Creatures, and that Professor Kettleburn had Hippogriffs....

DAMIEN: Yeah, Remy, Hippogriff dung! Yummy!

REMUS: Oh all right, I'll tell you my middle name.

LILY & NARCISSA: Yay!

SIRIUS: I must admit, I have been curious about that myself on occasion.

REMUS: It's Jeremiah.

ALBUS: There is silence in the Transfiguration classroom as they all digest this piece of information.

JAMES: Oh.

LUCIUS: I see.

PETER: Cool!

ALBUS: Everyone stares at Peter, who blushes in embarrassment.

PETER: Well, mine's John. It's a little boring, don't you think?

REMUS: if you say so Pete. Now, James, how long have you been dating Lily?

JAMES: But I'm not!

REMUS: Uh huh, I'll believe THAT the day of my wedding to Narcissa.

LUCIUS: Remus! I'm going to marry Narcissa!

NARCISSA: Yeah!

REMUS: I was being sarcastic. You know, I'll never believe that James and Lily aren't dating because I'll never marry Narcissa. Get it?

LUCIUS: I think so, yeah.

DAMIEN: Oh, go be evil somewhere else, Lucius.

JAMES: Lily and me aren't dating!

SIRIUS: Lily and I.

PETER: You're dating Lily???

SIRIUS: No Wormtail, I'm not. I was correcting James's grammar.

DANIEL: But his Grandma's not here.

REMUS: (Bashes head against a desk) Grrrr!!! I give up! James, tell me how long you and Lily have been dating or I'll tear your throat out with that spell Pete told me about last night!

JAMES: Eeep! Okay, we've been going out for three months.

LILY: And one week.

JAMES: I was close.

LILY: Very.

REMUS: (Calms down) Thank you.

LUCIUS: Okay Potter, ask your question!

JAMES: Okay, er, Sirius. Who are you taking to the Christmas dance?

SIRIUS: Ah, I can't tell you that!

JAMES: (Evil grin) That's what I thought you'd say. This way I can dare you!

SIRIUS: I have a bad feeling about this.

REMUS: So would I in your position.

ALBUS: James continued to grin evilly at Sirius, while the others looked on eagerly.



REMUS: And unfortunately, that's all we've got time for, people! Come back soon and read the next chapter!

JAMES: You know, once it's been written.

SW: Aren't you two just so helpful.

JAMES & REMUS: Sure are!

SIRIUS: Don't worry SW, I'll do it!

SW: Gee, thanks.

SIRIUS: REVIEW!!!!!! You'll get chocolate!

REMUS: And you'll get to find out what James is going to do to poor Padfoot!

PETER: And if we're lucky, we'll also discover the truth about Snape's hair!