[Authoress's Notes:

[A short little chapter.  (I would just like it noted that this chapter, the previous one, and the next one were originally all one chapter, but things got longer than I intended, so oh well).  I rather like this one, though I couldn't tell you why.  There really isn't much to it.  And, once again, ffn seems to have the most random issues italicizing things I want it to.  Which is really annoying.  But here goes.

[Oh, and as to the title – I'm a complete ABBA freak.  Love 'em.  Go listen to ABBA or Mamma Mia! right now.  Hehe

[Enjoy!]

Chapter Thirteen

"I hardly dare to think of what might happen

Where I'd be if I fell"

~~ABBA, "Under Attack"

Meanwhile, on the divine plane, the Goddesses were still in a tiff.

"I still don't understand how this could have happened!" Life squealed.  "This was not how the story was supposed to go."

"Certainly is nae how we wrote it."

"Of course it isn't," Death said, sounding very bored with the whole thing.  "But you didn't honestly think you were the only ones who got your hands on his script?"

Chaos was giggling inanely.  "You're brilliant!  Bloody brilliant!"

"Thank you."

"But… but…" Life sputtered.  "We had it written!  A nice quiet life up until he went and joined the army!  Normal parents, normal siblings…"

"Of course he had normal parents.  Normal parents in that culture arrange marriages."  Death smirked slightly.  "I just provided the girl."

"Ye're horrid."

"Thank you."

Chaos kept giggling.  "You've made my job so much easier, Death!"

"No!" Life shrieked.  "No!  You leave her alone!  Haven't you done enough?"

"Nope."

"Chaos, let th' poor thing work it out 'erself!  It might be okay yet, if th' two o' y just stay out o' th' poor dear's life!"

"And why should I do that?" Chaos asked, languidly leaning against the wall.  "She's mine.  I want her back.  And I'll do whatever I have to tear her away from that little distraction you whipped up."

"That's dreadful of you!"

"Th' lass has a chance o' bein' happy, Chaos!" Nature scolded.  "Isn' tha' what any Mum should want f'r 'er Daughter?"

"She'll be happier with me," Chaos petulantly insisted.

"Because you'll turn her back to the mindless drone she was and she won't know any better!"  Life was working herself into a fit.

"I've had enough of this!" Chaos decided.  "You two are so boring.  Oh.  And, Life?"  Life blinked at her.  "Better keep an eye on your Daughter."  Cackling wildly, She disappeared in a burst of flame.

Nature glared at Death with all the ferocity She could muster.  "An' here I thought ye'd be helpin' us."  Death just shrugged and disappeared in a puff of fog.

~~*~~

Her mind is cold.  Not only that, but void.  The sensations she has known all her life, of being in tune with the natural world, have suddenly left her.  Bereft of those gifts she has never been without, her mind is cold.  Her soul shivers.

She opens her eyes to a blinding light, causing her to scream in pain and squeeze her eyelids shut again.  The chill is replaced almost immediately by searing heat, desert winds swirling around her.  Somewhere in the background, she can hear screaming, the throaty cries of some person in great pain.  On top of that is the haunting melody of a pack of wolves howling.  She tries to block the sound out, but to no avail.  Her only recourse then is to scream back at the all-encompassing fear.

A voice permeates the shrieks.  Low, sultry, and terrifying.  "Mine," it says.  "Always mine."

Cassadraine woke with a start, sitting bolt upright on her cot and hitting her head against the canvas of the tent.  Her hand flew unconsciously to the Necklace about her throat.  After a few deep breathes, she was able to assure herself that she was safe – relatively – in her tent with only Benna near her.  She glanced to the side and saw that Benna slept soundly still.  Cassadraine breathed a sigh of relief that she had only been screaming in her mind and not out loud.  Wouldn't that be embarrassing? she thought, dragging a hand through her tangled curls.  First night away from home and Mika flips out.  Lovely.

Cassadraine lay back down, pulling her thin blanket back over her body.  I do hope this doesn't become a regular occurrence… that could get real annoying real bloody quick…

~~*~~

Cassadraine spent the duration of the day being introduced to people and becoming acquainted with training schedules and the daily routine.  She learned that there was yet a third Misab sibling who served as an army officer, Captain Tembral Misab, younger than Etral and Tokala and resembling her brother.  The two Captains gave everyone permission to use their first names, as otherwise it got rather confusing.  Five minutes into the first training session, Cassadraine found she liked Tembral quite a lot when she smacked Etien upside the head for no readily apparent reason.

"Aswold!  Where's your head, boy?"  Cassadraine had to stifle a giggle; Tembral was older than Cassadraine, but certainly younger than Etien.  She also had a fairly good idea where his mind was wandering off to, from the hungry looks he'd been given her all afternoon.  But, determined to make a good impression, Cassadraine had kept herself grounded and focusing on her work.  She had initially been partnered with Benna for sparring practice, but that had been changed when Tembral realized she far exceeded the tiny woman's strength and speed.  Benna, in her gracious manner, didn't seem the least bit fazed.

"Say, Cassadraine, I hear they got some good meat for the stew this evening!" she chirped, bouncing up as the sun was setting.

Tembral, walking behind them, decided to put in her opinion.  "Yeah, an' a damn good thing, too.  I was gettin' tired of stale bread and watery soup."  She hit Cassadraine playfully.  "You're gonna find dinner here isn't quite what you're used to."

Cassadraine laughed.  "Quite alright.  Wasn't expecting any different."

They came to the fire circle amidst the rows of women's tents.  Two other fighters, Ixia and Taci, were apparently having some trouble starting a fire.  "Bloody frustrating piece of…" Ixia muttered, then threw her flint in irritation.

Cassadraine tilted her head.  "No luck?"

Ixia shook her head.  "We had a bad rain a few nights ago, and I think some of th' wood's still damp."

"Well, let's see what I can do."  Ixia started to retrieve the flint, but she hadn't gone two steps before the pile of logs and kindling had transformed into a raging bonfire.  Four pairs of eyes widened in amazement.  Tacima shrank back in fear.

"Uhm… Cassadraine?"

"Yes, Captain?"

"How'd you do that?"

"Oh.  Er.  Well, I've been doing it since I was eight.  Making things burst into flames, that is."

"Gracious!" Benna exclaimed.  "Why didn't you tell us?"

Cassadraine looked between them.  "Well, it didn't really occur to me.  I mean, surely there are lots of people here who can do that.  Mages and such.  Aren't there?"

Tembral shook her head slowly.  "Can you… can you do that whenever you want?"

"Well, it used to happen sort of spontaneously," Cassadraine said thoughtfully, twisting a lock of hair around her finger.  "But my aymas taught me how to control it."

"Oh!  That's right.  Tok said you were… er… one of the old kind."

Cassadraine grinned and nodded.  "L'ai'kiva."

"We don't get many of them.  I think there's a water mage wandering around with Captain Esemi's troops, but…"  Tembral quit looking worried and suddenly seemed thrilled.  "This is fantastic.  The Misokans won't know what hit 'em."  Cassadraine had the distinct feeling she'd just become a valuable resource.

~~*~~

"Mika!" 

Cassadraine looked up from her stew to find Tembral calling at her.  "Ma'am?"

"Oh, for the love of… don't call me that.  Anyway.  General wants you an' Aswold to do some night reconnaissance.  Saddle up after dinner."

"Yes, ma—Tembral."

Tembral shook a finger at her disapprovingly before walking away.  Beside Cassadraine, Benna giggled.  "Oh, you're so lucky.  You've only been here a few days and already you get the good assignments."

"Well, I did join specifically for the purpose of being a scout…"

"Oh, I know, but still… the rest of us all have to be in our tents and you'll be riding about the countryside enjoying yourself."

Cassadraine allowed herself a small grin before she raised the spoon to her lips.  Enjoying myself indeed… Etien had been going stir crazy the past few days, and Cassadraine had no doubt in her mind that he was going to take advantage of a few hours away from camp.

After dinner, she went to prepare Brianna, and found Etien likewise tending to Tiernan.  She smiled brightly.  "So.  You ready?"

"'Course I am," he grinned, then leaned over and kissed her.

Cassadraine flushed to the roots of her hair.  "If Benna sees this, I'm never going to hear the end of it."  Etien's only response was to kiss her again.  She pushed him lightly.  "Etien.  You know we've got to get our work done first."

He sighed, and she could hear how tense he was.  She tried not to laugh.  "I know, I know…"  He sounded truly dejected.  "Fortunately, that shouldn't take but so long."

Cassadraine grinned.  "Let's hope not."

As Etien predicted, the two scouts completed their rounds fairly quickly.  Their route was not long, an excursion along the established army perimeter to make sure the Misokans had pressed no further south.  So far as anyone could tell, they had not yet made it past the curve of the Red Alienor River or gone through any of the mountain passes which would lead them south of the city of Minyana.

Cassadraine and Etien were still some ways from camp when Etien said, "I think we ought to stop for a while… give the horses a rest."

Cassadraine whirled Brianna around, smirking at him.  "Give the horses a rest?"

He grinned back at her.  "They've been a while without a break."

"Indeed.  And you're not just saying that because you've been a while without something, either?"  His only answer was to trot Tiernan close enough so that he could stroke Cassadraine's cheek.  A brief moment after that, both scouts had leapt from their saddles, tied their horses' reins to tree branches, and made a mad dash for the nearest patch of grass.  They hadn't got much farther than a few impassioned kisses, however, before Cassadraine shoved him away.  Etien was distinctly startled, but not nearly so much as Cassadraine, whose mind's eye had suddenly been engulfed in flame.

Cackling. Scare you, did I?

Go away go away go away!

No.  I'm here and I'm not going away.  Not until you come to your senses.

Stop it!  I want nothing to do with you!  Haven't I made that clear?!

Etien's confusion quickly turned to concern when he saw the look of horror etched on Cassadraine's pretty features.  "Cassadraine?  What is it, what's wrong?"

"She's…"  Cassadraine gulped.  Chaos's presence in her mind had for some reason made her throat gone dry, and speaking was a challenge.  "She's in my head…"
"Who?"

Don't you tell him!

"Her… my…"

You'll regret it!  I promise you that!

"Cassadraine, hun, deep breaths, it's okay…"

"No, it isn't, not with…"

Stop right now!

Make me!  I'll stop if you get out of my head!

"It's my… my Mother!" she finally gasped.

I warned you!  The illusionary blaze inside her head flared up again.

"Your mother?  But…"

"Not my…"

Not another word!

"Not my mortal mother!"

"What?"

"I'll… I'll explain later… but…"

Not if I have anything to say about it, you won't!

You don't!  This is my life!

"But what, dear?"

"But I can't now…"

Or ever!

"Not with her in my head, I can't…"  Cassadraine sobbed from the splintering pain in her mind; her Mother's tyrade on top of various other Chaotic noises: hellhounds baying after a kill, the shrieks of torture victims, thunder and lightening exploding against her temples.  Cassadraine suddenly realized that Chaos could wreak havoc in her mind with less than a thought.  "Oh, Etien!"

He can't help you now.

Bloody hell!  Certainly can! Cassadraine defiantly insisted, despite the din and pain in her mind.  "Etien, please, just hold me…"

Though considerably bewildered, Etien did not hesitate to do as she asked.  His astonishment only increased as his typically strong Cassadraine broke down crying in his arms, as though sobbing would rid Chaos from her mind.  She closed off her thoughts; Chaos was still ranting and raving, but Cassadraine refused to dignify Her with a response, instead focusing on the warmth of Etien's body and the strength of his embrace.  Eventually Chaos got bored, gave up, and went away, allowing Cassadraine's tears to abate.  When Etien had assured himself she was alright, he helped her back onto her horse, awaiting an explanation but knowing it would come when she was ready.

~~*~~

Nature smiled serenely.  "You see, Life?  I told ye it would be alright."

"That was… amazing!  How did he do that?"

"He didnae need t' do anythin'.  Jus' by existin'… he is wha' she needs."

"Chaos isn't going to be happy."

"I didnae expect so."

[That Goddess moment brought to you by the number 42 and the letter G.

[Right.  So now we've seen Cassadraine have a complete nervous breakdown.  What could be worse?  (::low chuckle::)  And how in the name of everything holy is Cassadraine going to explain this all to Etien?  I mean, that's not something you can just slip into conversation.  "Lovely weather we're having, by the way, I'm known in some planes as the Daughter of Flame, and my immortal Mother and Creator is Chaos, the Goddess of Fire, Storm, and Destruction, could you pass the scones?"  Not easy.  I should know, I've tried.

[Oh, and bonus points to anyone who can guess who Atika gets reincarnated as.  (Admittedly, this question is only fair to people who know about the other lives, but that's the way the muffin crumbles).

[Right.  Review!  Now!]