Chapter 5
Let Things Be
Aya's so happy and innocent... How can she stay that way while the world is such a piece of crap? She must be amazingly strong to keep a positive outlook in this negative life. She really is an amazing woman.. I'm so weak, letting my emotions fall as I realize how dark the world really is. I'm just a pathetic little depressed guy who can't get a girlfriend.
Whatever. Even if she can manage to stay happy, she should show that she realizes how shitty life is. She's been sheltered, hasn't she? She's never had a boyfriend that used her before. Why else would she follow Tooya around so faithfully when it's so obvious that he'll end up hurting her?
I thought back to a past conversation with Suzumi...
"Suzumi, why are you stoic?" I asked. Few people knew this, but Suzumi had suppressed all emotions when the love of her life passed away.
"Because.. I felt only emotions of sadness and anger. By eliminating all emotions, I have become able to think through things logically. Well, I'm not entirely stoic actually. When somebody unjustly betrays another, I do feel angry."
"Why would you have to feel angry?"
"Because the other person is getting hurt, of course!"
"But maybe it's for the better that nobody intervenes. You can't shelter them from everything. It's important that they learn how to handle betrayal so that when they are betrayed in a bigger sense, it does not hurt them as badly."
That's right. Aya can't be sheltered forever. If she is never hurt by Tooya now, what will happen when another man uses her? Her relationship with Tooya will probably be very short anyway. If she marries a man who does not love her, what will happen then?
It'll be hard, but I said with my own mouth that sheltering others is wrong. It's tempting to set Aya free of this pain, but in the long run, it'll be better for her. I'll let Tooya have his way with her.. Only to prevent her from ever being hurt worse.
** ** **
I walked up to Tooya wearing fake smile the next day. "Tooya!"
He turned around and greeted me with a smile.
"I.. I'm going to accept that you and Aya are together. You make her happy.. And that makes me happy."
"All right," Tooya said, smiling back at me. "She makes me happy too."
I didn't respond. I don't give a shit if she makes you happy. Just break up with her and be done with it. Please... because I can't keep up this lie for long.
Let Things Be
Aya's so happy and innocent... How can she stay that way while the world is such a piece of crap? She must be amazingly strong to keep a positive outlook in this negative life. She really is an amazing woman.. I'm so weak, letting my emotions fall as I realize how dark the world really is. I'm just a pathetic little depressed guy who can't get a girlfriend.
Whatever. Even if she can manage to stay happy, she should show that she realizes how shitty life is. She's been sheltered, hasn't she? She's never had a boyfriend that used her before. Why else would she follow Tooya around so faithfully when it's so obvious that he'll end up hurting her?
I thought back to a past conversation with Suzumi...
"Suzumi, why are you stoic?" I asked. Few people knew this, but Suzumi had suppressed all emotions when the love of her life passed away.
"Because.. I felt only emotions of sadness and anger. By eliminating all emotions, I have become able to think through things logically. Well, I'm not entirely stoic actually. When somebody unjustly betrays another, I do feel angry."
"Why would you have to feel angry?"
"Because the other person is getting hurt, of course!"
"But maybe it's for the better that nobody intervenes. You can't shelter them from everything. It's important that they learn how to handle betrayal so that when they are betrayed in a bigger sense, it does not hurt them as badly."
That's right. Aya can't be sheltered forever. If she is never hurt by Tooya now, what will happen when another man uses her? Her relationship with Tooya will probably be very short anyway. If she marries a man who does not love her, what will happen then?
It'll be hard, but I said with my own mouth that sheltering others is wrong. It's tempting to set Aya free of this pain, but in the long run, it'll be better for her. I'll let Tooya have his way with her.. Only to prevent her from ever being hurt worse.
** ** **
I walked up to Tooya wearing fake smile the next day. "Tooya!"
He turned around and greeted me with a smile.
"I.. I'm going to accept that you and Aya are together. You make her happy.. And that makes me happy."
"All right," Tooya said, smiling back at me. "She makes me happy too."
I didn't respond. I don't give a shit if she makes you happy. Just break up with her and be done with it. Please... because I can't keep up this lie for long.
