Piccolo's World

Well, here it is, Chapter II. Sorry it took so long, but I haven't been able to touch a computer in like two weeks. Hopefully there has been some interest in this..

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Chapter II

Krillen came into Vegeta's store in the middle of the day. Goku was on the counter sleeping and Vegeta was in the back.

"Hey Goku," Krillen said. "What's Vegeta?"

Goku didn't even open his eyes. He simply lifted a finger and pointed to the back room. Krillen nodded and walked back there. Vegeta sat in a corner eating a jar of grape jelly.

"What the fuck do you want?" Vegeta asked angrily. "I'm busy right now."

Krillen pulled out two large blunts. "I got us some fuckin' weed."

Vegeta's eyes widened and he threw the jar of grape jelly against the wall. "Good job, chrome dome!"

Five minutes later...

Vegeta and Krillen sat in wooden chairs smoking the blunts, laughing, and watching an episode of none other then DBZ on Vegeta's small television set.

"This is the good part," Vegeta laughed.

On the show he was about to kill Nappa.

"Look at Nappa's eyes," Krillen laughed. "That shit is FUNNY!"

"You dirty rat!" Nappa shouted. This made them laugh even more.

"He had some stupid last words," Vegeta said, "and check out his face! Just priceless!"

More insane laughter. Nappa was disintegrated and they continued to laugh. Tears were even in their bloodshot eyes because they were laughing so hard.

"You sure know how to kill people Vegeta," Krillen said.

"Damn right I do. I'm an expert."

They laughed some more and Vegeta fast-forwarded the tape they were watching.

"This part is funny as hell too," Vegeta said.

It showed Freeza killing Krillen back on Namek, and Vegeta got a BIG laugh out of it while Krillen sat there motionless. He didn't think that was funny.

---

Piccolo was sitting at his table with his cigar box in front of him. It had a picture of Piccolo on the box giving a thumbs up and below the picture was:

Piccolo's Cigars "I put the 'E' in WEED!"

He sat drinking a glass of water when Trunks and Goten came in escorted by Cell.

"Uhh, hey, Piccolo," Trunks greeted. "We heard you had some ice cream for us."

Piccolo didn't look angry, but happy. He didn't like these two little punks, but he was stoned like a motherfucker.

"Have a seat," Piccolo offered.

They sat on chars that were on the left and right of the Namek. There was some worry on their faces.

"Have some cigars," Piccolo offered placing a cigar in front of each of them.

"Aren't we a little young?" Goten asked.

"Not in Piccolo's World," Piccolo replied. "So go ahead. It's completely harmless anyway."

"Might as well," Trunks agreed.

Piccolo nodded with an evil grin on his face. They put the cigars in their mouths and with a snap of his fingers the cigars were lit. Both kids inhaled and started coughing immediately after. It was VERY powerful weed. Their eyes were bloodshot and their bodies started to twitch.

"What's going on?" Trunks asked. "Help me!"

Within seconds they were both trippin' like hell. Piccolo laughed insanely and pounded his fist on the table as the kids tripped. The kids looked scared and happy at the same time.

"You guys seen your moms lately?" Piccolo asked.

"Uhm. no," Goten answered.

"Do you know why?"

"No."

"I'll tell you why! I TORE OFF THEIR HEADS AND SKULL FUCKED THEM!"

Although this was a lie, Piccolo's look indicated that he was telling the truth. The two kids (or punks, as Piccolo called them) looked afraid, believing Piccolo was indeed serious.

"I hate you fuckin' kids. Damn little punks. I brought you bitches here just so I could have a good laugh. and KILL YOU!"

And Piccolo indeed had a good laugh while the two stood up afraid. They didn't know whether to believe him or not. They tried to walk out but realized they couldn't walk straight. Everything was. different. So they instead staggered their way out.

"You punks never took Piccolo seriously," Piccolo told them. "You little fuckers would never fucking listen to me. So now you'll die!"

"This is a funny moment," Cell said blocking the entrance with his arms crossed.

Piccolo stood up and took off his sunglasses. His eyes were bloodshot and he grinned.

"You guys ready to die?"

"No," Trunks replied.

They looked so afraid. Piccolo began to charge up an attack.

"Please Mr. Piccolo don't!" Goten begged.

"See you in Hell!" Piccolo shouted. The kids screamed and then Piccolo's attack faded away. "I'm just kidding," he said calmly.

Cell and Piccolo got a giant laugh out of that. Trunks and Goten looked at each other for a moment and then joined in. Piccolo was just playing a joke!

"That's great," Piccolo said calmly, "just great."

Then, without warning, Piccolo blasted them and they were disintegrated. He had secretly charged up a powerful attack.

"You're one sick fuck sir," Cell said grinning.

"Damn right I am. I hate kids! Especially those two! This was a good day."

---

Somewhere else in the universe..

King Cold stood aboard his giant ship with his arms crossed over his chest. He stood observing space, wanting nothing more then to conquer.

"Hmm," King Cold said in his British accent. "My son Freeza hasn't reported his alliance with the Namek warlord on Earth. Commander, I want you to contact the Namek. I will speak with him now."

"Immediately, Master King Cold," his Commander (some alien-looking guy) acknowledged.

"You have called me that for the last time, Commander. I am not Master King Cold. I am just King Cold."

"Fuck!" his Commander exclaimed before King Cold disintegrated him. King Cold pointed to someone else. "You're the Commander now. Get the Namek on the screen."

"Huh? Oh, immediately, uhh, King Cold," his new Commander acknowledged.

---

Piccolo was in his office sleeping when King Cold's face appeared on the computer that was on his desk.

"Ah, greetings and salutations Namek," King Cold greeted.

Piccolo didn't move. He was having a nice, weed-filled dream.

"Namek?"

Still no movement.

"Namek!!" King Cold shouted.

Piccolo opened his bloodshot eyes and asked, "Is that you Satan?"

King Cold laughed and said, "In a way."

Piccolo saw the screen and said "Oh" in a very disappointing voice. He put on his sunglasses and straightened his tie. "Greetings King Cold."

"Hmm, indeed. Where is my son Freeza at?"

"Who? Oh, him. he met with an. unfortunate accident."

"Oh? What kind of 'unfortunate accident' would that be?"

"I killed him," Piccolo simply told him.

King Cold's eyes widened. "HUH?!"

"It was good to speak with you King Cold, but I have some important matters to attend to. Good day."

Piccolo destroyed the computer, took off his sunglasses, and fell back to sleep.

---

King Cold was outraged. "Change course!" he shouted. "To Earth!"

His commander quickly changed the course of the ship.

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That's the end of Chapter II. Hopefully you thought it was pretty funny, because there's even more in store for you!!