Disclaimers: Nothing obtained, nothing to lose.
Warnings: Shonen Ai 2+1/1+2 (duh), R+?, romance, mild language, OOC, Heero's POV, lil Relena bashing (at the beginning).
Notes: Uh...not much to say here, Heero with Relena and not pleasant, ya know? Enjoy!
~!~!~!~!~
Let Me Go
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I feel the gentle sunlight pour into the room through the window, my eyes slowly open. I'm shirtless and in my boxers. I realize that I'm in my bed, but wasn't--
It was a dream? It wasn't real? Just a pleasant, wonderful dream?
I frown to myself, but it was so REAL!
Shit, I'm whining, aren't I?
I don't feel like getting up this morning...I don't want to. I don't know why I don't want to get up, I just don't. I'm feeling...lazy. That's the word, lazy...I think. Hn, I've never been lazy before.
My senses awaken shortly after and I smell the soft scent of...strawberries.
Strawberries?
My pillow is warm and firm...
I try to roll to my left but I bump into an obstacle. No, not an obstacle...
I turn to face whatever it was. God I hope I'm right...My cobalt eyes meet with a pair of wide deep amethyst orbs looking straight at me.
"Duo...?" I blink to make sure I'm not just imagining him. It's him, the cocky grin plastered on his face gave it away, just like one year and six months ago...or...last night. I could get used to this. Again.
"No, Quatre."
"Quatre...?" I say not because I believed him, but because I haven't heard his name in a very long time. When was the last time I saw the blond? I wondered to myself, it must have been...oh hell, who cares? I'll probably see him soon, I know he'll try to get me to come to one of his get together. The ones where you 'catch up on old times' sort of thing.
Duo frowns, "Maybe you have changed, you're not as sharp as you used to be." he says with sarcasm seeping from his voice. I recall what happened last night and look away, "Heero, tell me what's wrong...maybe I can help."
"...take me back Duo...onegai?" I plea quietly, it's a pathetic plea, but I don't care. All I want is for Duo to take me home and go back to the old ways that I've missed dearly. Take me home...
Do I even *have* a home?
He gathers me into his arms and sighs, "Is it that bad here?"
"Take me back..." I repeat.
He strokes my hair again, "I should have come sooner..." he says to himself quietly, I'm too wrapped up in wanting Duo to take me back, I don't even consider his words.
"Duo take me back!" I command. Other than feeling lazy, I'd say I'm feeling demanding too...that's unusual.
He pulls away and tilts my head up towards his with his finger under my chin, "Ya know Heero," he starts slowly, "we really never official broke up..."
"Nani?"
"We really never broke up." he repeats himself.
"What do you mean?"
What is he talking about? I *LEFT* him to live with *RELENA* and he says that we didn't break up? I think I've missed something here.
"I mean, you and I *DIDN'T* break up, at least not officially," his explanation doesn't help me to understand, I throw him a bewildered look and he continues, "You just...left, but we didn't break up."
Luckily he has patience because I'm still confused.
"You didn't tell me that you were leaving, and you didn't break up with me. Technically, we're still together." he says.
"How?" I ask.
"Well, it's like those times during the war when you got a mission and left without a word. We were still together, ne? We just didn't...see each other for awhile...a long while."
Oh, yes, I understand now...sort of. I suppose he's telling me that we took a...'break', I think. If that's what he wants to think of it as, I'll be happy to comply. What Duo told me makes sense in some strange way.
"Aa..." I reply, there's just one thing, "But...I came back after the mission...this time I didn't..."
He grins, "You didn't always come back after the mission, you know. Countless times I had to locate you in the hospital and bring you back myself."
"Like now?"
"Just like now."
"So we never broke up?"
"What did I just finish telling you? Hello? Are you awake yet?" he teases.
The ends of my lips curl up and I begin to...laugh. I'm laughing. I laugh for about five minutes straight which is really long, especially when coming from me. He waits for my laughter to subside. I hope he realizes that he's the only one who can make me smile a genuine smile and laugh a genuine laugh...
"Nani?" he asks when I finish.
I smile up at him, "I haven't laughed or smiled for one year, six months, two weeks, six days--"
I look down at my watch.
I frown, "Where's my watch?"
"It looked uncomfortable, so I took it off." he pointed to the piece of jewelry on the nightstand.
We sit up and I pick up the bulky wrist watch and continue, "...hmm," I look up at him and smile again, "I haven't smiled since 30 seconds ago." I say. I'm feeling a little mischiveous this morning, "I hate this watch. It pinches my skin, leaves bruises, and weighs more than my gun. On top of that, Relena gave it to me." I threw the watch at the wall.
*thump*
Tiny gears fly from the time telling device as it falls from the newly dented wall to the floor.
He chuckles.
"So...you're not mad?" I ask for the first time this morning referring to last night's conversation. He kept on avoiding my questions and changing the subject, I never got a straight answer.
Duo remains silent.
"Duo...?"
"...I was at first, but I think I was more sad than mad. I guess I was scared too, I mean, you just...took off one day and didn't return at night. I figured 'what the hell, you'll be back soon'...but you weren't..." his reply is void from any emotion, "I thought you'd come back to me Heero...but you didn't. I thought--" he stops himself, "...nevermind."
A surge of guilt covers me head to toe, "Gomen nasai..." I whisper in remorse. I didn't realize I had...hurt him too. I'm such an idiot. I'm so stupid. I...k'so! I feel terrible!
A pair of strong arms pull me into Duo's lap. His lap, I haven't...I-- oh shit. I wrap my arms around him and bury my head on to his shoulder. He brushes away the traces of emptiness of his voice and smiles, he must have seen all of the things written all over my face like he always does.
"Don't worry about it, Heero. You and I are together now. That's what matters most, ne?" he says, we *ARE* together now, aren't we? His words enlighten the guilt, some, not all, I still regret what I have done. Demo, I like the sound that we are together. Duo and me, me and Duo...it's so right. I see that now.
My musing is briefly interupted as Duo questions me, "You asked me why I really came here?" I nod, he frowns, "You forgot what day yesterday was?"
Oh god, he sounds like Relena...it's not a birthday because Relena's was yesterday. It's certainly not *MY* birthday or even his. So then...
"Friday." I say confidently.
His frown only deepens, "Is that the only thing you can think of?"
I pause and search my memory, might as well give it a try, "Friday AC 197...?"
"Nooooooo...try two year anniversary?"
"Two year anniver--" I stop, and think about two years before, it was Relena's birthday and I ripped her invitation in half. During the party, I went to blow up Wing, Relena came, 'Omae o korosu', Duo shoots me--OH YEAH! It was the very first time we met! I have the scars to prove it. I brush my hand over my right shoulder and right thigh where I was shot. I remember what day it is now.
"That's right, Heero." he says seeing that I have remembered the scars.
I look up at him, "Gomen nasai...I can't believe that I forgot Duo. Gomen nasai..." I apologize. How could I forget the day when that special someone walks into my life...and shoots me? How could I? I feel disgusted. "I'm so sorry, Duo..."
"It's alright, you've probably got alot of stuff on your mind."
"Just you..." I absently reply.
Duo smirks.
"Why did you come back to get me?" I ask.
"I missed you and I didn't like living without you. It took me awhile because I'm stubborn, I guess. Waiting for you to come back wasn't really getting me anywhere. I just needed a little push."
"Hn." I snuggle closer to Duo, something that I hadn't done in a long time.
"Heero?"
"Nani?"
"Ai shiteru..."
Loves me? Not just cares, but loves?
"You're doing it again, and yes, Not only do I care for you, but I love you...so much..."
I can't breathe...do I love him too? I know I feel something, but I don't know what it is...is it? Do I? I want to live the rest of my life by his side, I never want to leave him again...is it? Do I?
I do.
"...I love you too, Duo." I reply just above a whisper. Neither of us speak as we bask in the silence. I can't take this much longer.
Kiss me, dammit!
Either he read my mind or I said that out loud again...or both. Duo pulled my head up to his and brushed lips against mine at first gently, then more wanting. He doesn't use his tongue, and his hands don't roam, though I wish they would, he just uses his lips. They feel good, just like before. I push his head closer to mine giving Duo more mouth. The gentle kiss becomes passionate, my eyes close, I can hear our hearts beat, surprisingly at the same rate since I had expected mine to win a freight train race, two metronomes set at the same speed, a fast speed. I'm in a heaven no God could give me, except Shinigami...and only Shinigami...Duo...
He finally parts with me and his embrace tightens, "I heard from a little birdy that you hate it here, what do you say we get the hell outta this place?"
I smile a fourth time.
~!~!~!~!~
I look in my bag.
Laptop, check. Clothes, check. Gun...gun? GUN! I scramble around the room in search for my gun, "Duo--?"
He swings a familiar weapon around his long index finger, "Looking for *this*? I recall *this* gun pointing me last night, ne Hee-chan?" I glare, he definitely hasn't changed, "And I recall never liking *this*, especially in the hands of my seventeen year old koibito." Koibito...I'm his koibito...I'm Duo's koibito. Koibito, koibito, koibito..., "What should I do with *this* thing?" he asks me, I open my mouth, but before anything comes out, he ejects the magazine and deposits it in the waste basket, "There's no use for it..." he hands me the emptied gun, "Here ya go, Heero."
"Duo!"
He rummages through the little belongings that I have. He points to my laptop, "And you know, I never really liked *THAT* either. In fact, I'm pretty sure I hated it." he nods, "Yes, I'm quite sure that I hate it, ne Heero?"
"Hn."
He pecks me on the cheek softly, "Let's go Hee-chan."
I pause.
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TBC?
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On to part 4? Well, I think I did a better job on this part. Anyway, I apologize to all the people whom I was talking to on e-mail for no replying in a while. District basketball has started and I'm alittle (actually alot) behind schedule so...I'm sorry! I'll try to reply to you as soon as I can! And I'm sorry that this is so late! I hope it was worth your wait.
Hmm...a number of reviews say 'die fiend' or 'die relena'. Something related to that. I hadn't planned on bashing Relena in this, but I guess that she DID have Heero away from Duo and everyone knows whoever does that must be punished in some way or another, ne? So...should we bash her a little? Or keep her the good guy? Or both?
I've put up another fic to make up the lost time and latelyness (is that a word?) of this part for those who want to read more ^_^.
~!~!~!~!~
Arigato minna-san!
Mabi Yui: I'm glad that you think this is nice. I hope I've answered any of your questions that were hangin' in the air.; Sugar Goose: I know what you mean about the school work and stuff. It annoys me cause I don't get to write alot like I used to during the summer, but I'll try to find time so I can update my stories for you to read!; aniamie: I don't know why I was disappointed with part 2. I guess it was cause I didn't spend as much time on it as I did some of my other writings, but I'm glad that y'all liked it. ^_^ I love 1x2, but everyone seems to be into that and kinda ignores 2x1. It's as if you have to go hunting before you find one, ne? heehee bottomed Hee-chan, I just love him!; Mystic Dragonsfire: Here is more, and if wanted more to come! ^_^; Ella-FaTe2x1: Heehee, he took him back. What did you think about that?; Rei: Am I wonderful author? Aw, that makes me feel so good inside! Arigato! And you can write like this too, "About Friends and Christmas" was really cute!; Pallas: I thought I was gonna get more writing too, but turns out my laptop cord kinda...ripped and the battery ran down so I couldn't write. Yeah, it's like a mini e-mail. Sorry that I haven't replied to you in a while -_-;!; Kelp Soda: Glad you liked it, and I've written more ^_~; asaroth69: Relena bashing...hmm...I had actually thought that I could make Relena a good guy, but what do you think?; :) : I hope to keep your interest. Arigato for reading and I hope you enjoyed this part as well.; Yume Maxwell-Yuy: Wow, I haven't talked to you in a while, so HI! Have you updated your page? Oh! I'm sure you know, but I'm back from California. So I'll try to reply to you as soon as I can. So don't think that I've forgotten about you, ok?; Theresa Maxwell: The early hours of the day are the best time to read fics...or at least that's what I think. Arigato!; Tammo the warrior: Glad you liked it ^_^, I think I'll go with the fourth part for you.; moonbunny317: heehee, it took Hee-chan a while didn't it? Well, I think more will come. ^_^
Arigato and Ja ne!
Warnings: Shonen Ai 2+1/1+2 (duh), R+?, romance, mild language, OOC, Heero's POV, lil Relena bashing (at the beginning).
Notes: Uh...not much to say here, Heero with Relena and not pleasant, ya know? Enjoy!
~!~!~!~!~
Let Me Go
~!~!~!~!~
I feel the gentle sunlight pour into the room through the window, my eyes slowly open. I'm shirtless and in my boxers. I realize that I'm in my bed, but wasn't--
It was a dream? It wasn't real? Just a pleasant, wonderful dream?
I frown to myself, but it was so REAL!
Shit, I'm whining, aren't I?
I don't feel like getting up this morning...I don't want to. I don't know why I don't want to get up, I just don't. I'm feeling...lazy. That's the word, lazy...I think. Hn, I've never been lazy before.
My senses awaken shortly after and I smell the soft scent of...strawberries.
Strawberries?
My pillow is warm and firm...
I try to roll to my left but I bump into an obstacle. No, not an obstacle...
I turn to face whatever it was. God I hope I'm right...My cobalt eyes meet with a pair of wide deep amethyst orbs looking straight at me.
"Duo...?" I blink to make sure I'm not just imagining him. It's him, the cocky grin plastered on his face gave it away, just like one year and six months ago...or...last night. I could get used to this. Again.
"No, Quatre."
"Quatre...?" I say not because I believed him, but because I haven't heard his name in a very long time. When was the last time I saw the blond? I wondered to myself, it must have been...oh hell, who cares? I'll probably see him soon, I know he'll try to get me to come to one of his get together. The ones where you 'catch up on old times' sort of thing.
Duo frowns, "Maybe you have changed, you're not as sharp as you used to be." he says with sarcasm seeping from his voice. I recall what happened last night and look away, "Heero, tell me what's wrong...maybe I can help."
"...take me back Duo...onegai?" I plea quietly, it's a pathetic plea, but I don't care. All I want is for Duo to take me home and go back to the old ways that I've missed dearly. Take me home...
Do I even *have* a home?
He gathers me into his arms and sighs, "Is it that bad here?"
"Take me back..." I repeat.
He strokes my hair again, "I should have come sooner..." he says to himself quietly, I'm too wrapped up in wanting Duo to take me back, I don't even consider his words.
"Duo take me back!" I command. Other than feeling lazy, I'd say I'm feeling demanding too...that's unusual.
He pulls away and tilts my head up towards his with his finger under my chin, "Ya know Heero," he starts slowly, "we really never official broke up..."
"Nani?"
"We really never broke up." he repeats himself.
"What do you mean?"
What is he talking about? I *LEFT* him to live with *RELENA* and he says that we didn't break up? I think I've missed something here.
"I mean, you and I *DIDN'T* break up, at least not officially," his explanation doesn't help me to understand, I throw him a bewildered look and he continues, "You just...left, but we didn't break up."
Luckily he has patience because I'm still confused.
"You didn't tell me that you were leaving, and you didn't break up with me. Technically, we're still together." he says.
"How?" I ask.
"Well, it's like those times during the war when you got a mission and left without a word. We were still together, ne? We just didn't...see each other for awhile...a long while."
Oh, yes, I understand now...sort of. I suppose he's telling me that we took a...'break', I think. If that's what he wants to think of it as, I'll be happy to comply. What Duo told me makes sense in some strange way.
"Aa..." I reply, there's just one thing, "But...I came back after the mission...this time I didn't..."
He grins, "You didn't always come back after the mission, you know. Countless times I had to locate you in the hospital and bring you back myself."
"Like now?"
"Just like now."
"So we never broke up?"
"What did I just finish telling you? Hello? Are you awake yet?" he teases.
The ends of my lips curl up and I begin to...laugh. I'm laughing. I laugh for about five minutes straight which is really long, especially when coming from me. He waits for my laughter to subside. I hope he realizes that he's the only one who can make me smile a genuine smile and laugh a genuine laugh...
"Nani?" he asks when I finish.
I smile up at him, "I haven't laughed or smiled for one year, six months, two weeks, six days--"
I look down at my watch.
I frown, "Where's my watch?"
"It looked uncomfortable, so I took it off." he pointed to the piece of jewelry on the nightstand.
We sit up and I pick up the bulky wrist watch and continue, "...hmm," I look up at him and smile again, "I haven't smiled since 30 seconds ago." I say. I'm feeling a little mischiveous this morning, "I hate this watch. It pinches my skin, leaves bruises, and weighs more than my gun. On top of that, Relena gave it to me." I threw the watch at the wall.
*thump*
Tiny gears fly from the time telling device as it falls from the newly dented wall to the floor.
He chuckles.
"So...you're not mad?" I ask for the first time this morning referring to last night's conversation. He kept on avoiding my questions and changing the subject, I never got a straight answer.
Duo remains silent.
"Duo...?"
"...I was at first, but I think I was more sad than mad. I guess I was scared too, I mean, you just...took off one day and didn't return at night. I figured 'what the hell, you'll be back soon'...but you weren't..." his reply is void from any emotion, "I thought you'd come back to me Heero...but you didn't. I thought--" he stops himself, "...nevermind."
A surge of guilt covers me head to toe, "Gomen nasai..." I whisper in remorse. I didn't realize I had...hurt him too. I'm such an idiot. I'm so stupid. I...k'so! I feel terrible!
A pair of strong arms pull me into Duo's lap. His lap, I haven't...I-- oh shit. I wrap my arms around him and bury my head on to his shoulder. He brushes away the traces of emptiness of his voice and smiles, he must have seen all of the things written all over my face like he always does.
"Don't worry about it, Heero. You and I are together now. That's what matters most, ne?" he says, we *ARE* together now, aren't we? His words enlighten the guilt, some, not all, I still regret what I have done. Demo, I like the sound that we are together. Duo and me, me and Duo...it's so right. I see that now.
My musing is briefly interupted as Duo questions me, "You asked me why I really came here?" I nod, he frowns, "You forgot what day yesterday was?"
Oh god, he sounds like Relena...it's not a birthday because Relena's was yesterday. It's certainly not *MY* birthday or even his. So then...
"Friday." I say confidently.
His frown only deepens, "Is that the only thing you can think of?"
I pause and search my memory, might as well give it a try, "Friday AC 197...?"
"Nooooooo...try two year anniversary?"
"Two year anniver--" I stop, and think about two years before, it was Relena's birthday and I ripped her invitation in half. During the party, I went to blow up Wing, Relena came, 'Omae o korosu', Duo shoots me--OH YEAH! It was the very first time we met! I have the scars to prove it. I brush my hand over my right shoulder and right thigh where I was shot. I remember what day it is now.
"That's right, Heero." he says seeing that I have remembered the scars.
I look up at him, "Gomen nasai...I can't believe that I forgot Duo. Gomen nasai..." I apologize. How could I forget the day when that special someone walks into my life...and shoots me? How could I? I feel disgusted. "I'm so sorry, Duo..."
"It's alright, you've probably got alot of stuff on your mind."
"Just you..." I absently reply.
Duo smirks.
"Why did you come back to get me?" I ask.
"I missed you and I didn't like living without you. It took me awhile because I'm stubborn, I guess. Waiting for you to come back wasn't really getting me anywhere. I just needed a little push."
"Hn." I snuggle closer to Duo, something that I hadn't done in a long time.
"Heero?"
"Nani?"
"Ai shiteru..."
Loves me? Not just cares, but loves?
"You're doing it again, and yes, Not only do I care for you, but I love you...so much..."
I can't breathe...do I love him too? I know I feel something, but I don't know what it is...is it? Do I? I want to live the rest of my life by his side, I never want to leave him again...is it? Do I?
I do.
"...I love you too, Duo." I reply just above a whisper. Neither of us speak as we bask in the silence. I can't take this much longer.
Kiss me, dammit!
Either he read my mind or I said that out loud again...or both. Duo pulled my head up to his and brushed lips against mine at first gently, then more wanting. He doesn't use his tongue, and his hands don't roam, though I wish they would, he just uses his lips. They feel good, just like before. I push his head closer to mine giving Duo more mouth. The gentle kiss becomes passionate, my eyes close, I can hear our hearts beat, surprisingly at the same rate since I had expected mine to win a freight train race, two metronomes set at the same speed, a fast speed. I'm in a heaven no God could give me, except Shinigami...and only Shinigami...Duo...
He finally parts with me and his embrace tightens, "I heard from a little birdy that you hate it here, what do you say we get the hell outta this place?"
I smile a fourth time.
~!~!~!~!~
I look in my bag.
Laptop, check. Clothes, check. Gun...gun? GUN! I scramble around the room in search for my gun, "Duo--?"
He swings a familiar weapon around his long index finger, "Looking for *this*? I recall *this* gun pointing me last night, ne Hee-chan?" I glare, he definitely hasn't changed, "And I recall never liking *this*, especially in the hands of my seventeen year old koibito." Koibito...I'm his koibito...I'm Duo's koibito. Koibito, koibito, koibito..., "What should I do with *this* thing?" he asks me, I open my mouth, but before anything comes out, he ejects the magazine and deposits it in the waste basket, "There's no use for it..." he hands me the emptied gun, "Here ya go, Heero."
"Duo!"
He rummages through the little belongings that I have. He points to my laptop, "And you know, I never really liked *THAT* either. In fact, I'm pretty sure I hated it." he nods, "Yes, I'm quite sure that I hate it, ne Heero?"
"Hn."
He pecks me on the cheek softly, "Let's go Hee-chan."
I pause.
~!~!~!~!~
TBC?
~!~!~!~!~
On to part 4? Well, I think I did a better job on this part. Anyway, I apologize to all the people whom I was talking to on e-mail for no replying in a while. District basketball has started and I'm alittle (actually alot) behind schedule so...I'm sorry! I'll try to reply to you as soon as I can! And I'm sorry that this is so late! I hope it was worth your wait.
Hmm...a number of reviews say 'die fiend' or 'die relena'. Something related to that. I hadn't planned on bashing Relena in this, but I guess that she DID have Heero away from Duo and everyone knows whoever does that must be punished in some way or another, ne? So...should we bash her a little? Or keep her the good guy? Or both?
I've put up another fic to make up the lost time and latelyness (is that a word?) of this part for those who want to read more ^_^.
~!~!~!~!~
Arigato minna-san!
Mabi Yui: I'm glad that you think this is nice. I hope I've answered any of your questions that were hangin' in the air.; Sugar Goose: I know what you mean about the school work and stuff. It annoys me cause I don't get to write alot like I used to during the summer, but I'll try to find time so I can update my stories for you to read!; aniamie: I don't know why I was disappointed with part 2. I guess it was cause I didn't spend as much time on it as I did some of my other writings, but I'm glad that y'all liked it. ^_^ I love 1x2, but everyone seems to be into that and kinda ignores 2x1. It's as if you have to go hunting before you find one, ne? heehee bottomed Hee-chan, I just love him!; Mystic Dragonsfire: Here is more, and if wanted more to come! ^_^; Ella-FaTe2x1: Heehee, he took him back. What did you think about that?; Rei: Am I wonderful author? Aw, that makes me feel so good inside! Arigato! And you can write like this too, "About Friends and Christmas" was really cute!; Pallas: I thought I was gonna get more writing too, but turns out my laptop cord kinda...ripped and the battery ran down so I couldn't write. Yeah, it's like a mini e-mail. Sorry that I haven't replied to you in a while -_-;!; Kelp Soda: Glad you liked it, and I've written more ^_~; asaroth69: Relena bashing...hmm...I had actually thought that I could make Relena a good guy, but what do you think?; :) : I hope to keep your interest. Arigato for reading and I hope you enjoyed this part as well.; Yume Maxwell-Yuy: Wow, I haven't talked to you in a while, so HI! Have you updated your page? Oh! I'm sure you know, but I'm back from California. So I'll try to reply to you as soon as I can. So don't think that I've forgotten about you, ok?; Theresa Maxwell: The early hours of the day are the best time to read fics...or at least that's what I think. Arigato!; Tammo the warrior: Glad you liked it ^_^, I think I'll go with the fourth part for you.; moonbunny317: heehee, it took Hee-chan a while didn't it? Well, I think more will come. ^_^
Arigato and Ja ne!
