"Picture" by Kid Rock f/ Sheryl Crow

Disclaimer: I don't own the rights to this song, or to Harry or Draco (dammit).Some fluff factor at he end, turn back now.

A/N: For those that know the song, Kid Rock=Draco, Sheryl Crow=Harry

~*~

He assumed Harry had forgotten about him. Maybe just a repressed memory then, he thought to himself as he stared at the green-eyed boy standing in front of him.

"So who's your friend, Malfoy?" Draco heard him ask. He did not want to talk about the girl hanging on his arm (whatever her name was), Draco knew that he would much rather be snogging with Harry then making idle chit chat about a stupid girl. Of course, Harry had made it painstakingly clear that he wanted nothing to do with Draco and because Draco loved him so much he did not push it. Seeing him now, again after all these years was like a breath of fresh air for someone who had been under water too long.

LIVIN MY LIFE IN A SLOW HELL

Maybe seeing Harry again was a sign that he has moved on, Draco thought as he stared at the athame in his hand. He all but confirmed that he didn't love him anymore, he decided, trying to figure out whether or not to plunge the dagger in further. Blood had already started to bubble where he was applying pressure to his heart. Should he just end it now?

DIFFERENT GIRL EVERY NIGHT AT THE HOTEL

After Harry had ripped his heart out and put it in a blender, Draco became unattached from everyone--no feelings, no commitments, no chance at heartache. He had long since lost track of how many girls he had fucked since Harry had left him, but he didn't really care anyway. They meant nothing to him, he still loved that special boy with all his heart.

I AIN'T SEEN THE SUNSHINE IN THREE DAMN DAYS

It had been three days since he ran into Harry at Hogsmeade and he had foolishly deluded himself into believing Harry might call him. Draco purposely kept the same number at his flat so that Harry could reach him if necessary. He had smiled at him, Draco thought, when he saw him the other day. Maybe, just maybe, he still loved him?

BEEN FUELING UP ON COCAINE AND WHISKEY

Draco sat there and downed another shot, not remembering how many he'd had so far. Oh well, doesn't really matter either way. Harry doesn't care anymore, he probably never did anyway. He found a new bar after the last one closed and ordered a whole bottle, forgoing a shot. They started up the Kareoke machine and hell, if he wasn't drunk enough yet he soon would be--this could get interesting.

WISH I HAD A GOOD BOY TO MISS ME

Draco sang from his heart. He had picked this one because it matched his mood, though he was starting to slur his words. He could not remember the last time he was this drunk, usually his self-control or one of his friend's cautionary comments would have stopped him by now. Can't one die from alcohol poisoning?

I WONDER IF I'LL EVER CHANGE MY WAYS

He had to stop drinking now. This is becoming too much of a habit, he thought while some slut tried to get him to bed. What if Harry decided that he wanted him back--he couldn't be a disgrace, he had to be good from now on. After tonight, that is

I PUT YOUR PICTURE AWAY

They went upstairs to Draco's room and he became hesitant when he saw the picture of Harry and him on his windowsill. He shoved it in the drawer and ignored his morals for the rest of the night.

SAT DOWN AND CRIED THE DAY

This is why he didn't drink so often, Draco complained as he took more aspirin from the cabinet. Acting just like Harry, he thought as he blew his nose again. Crying, what a sap! Harry was so distant and cold the other day, was that what he used to be like before they were together?

I CAN'T LOOK AT YOU WHILE I'M LYING NEXT TO HER

He took the picture out of the drawer so he could return it to the sunlight. It was always the same, every night he would put the picture in the drawer because he could not bear Harry's face seeing him with a girl, those beautiful, stubborn, lovely eyes

I PUT YOUR PICTURE AWAY, SAT DOWN AND CRIED TODAY

The sobs broke free from his throat, his body collapsing in misery. He packed up everything that reminded him of Harry so that he would move on (Harry obviously had). Optimism was never your strong suit, he can still hear Harry saying. His decision to 'turn over a new leaf' was useless, he would never change.

I CAN'T LOOK AT YOU WHILE I'M LYING NEXT TO HER

He had done it again. He had promised himself to be better than that but here he was, drunk and in bed with a girl. He didn't really get any pleasure out of this, he didn't know why he bothered to hide the fact that he liked boys. Oh hell, he had nothing better to do anyway.

I CALLED YOU LAST NIGHT AT THE HOTEL

Harry was sick of the monotone ringing in his ear. Seeing Draco the other day reminded him of how much he gave up all those years ago. And he wanted it back. Leave it to Draco to not be home in the middle of the night. Where is he? Is he seeing someone? Like, an important someone?

EVERYONE KNOWS BUT THEY WON'T TELL

Harry asked around, to the twins (who usually knew everything about everyone), to people at the bar or the hotel, to Dobby the house elf (who knew a lot about the Malfoys). Nobody told him anything, ever. He ached for days long since gone, when there were no complications, calculations, just the love of a beautiful blond boy and the security of adolescence.

THEIR HALF HEARTED SMILES TELL ME SOMETHING JUST AIN'T RIGHT

He had heard nothing of Draco since he broke up with him years ago. Has he become a death eater? Part of Harry would never believe that the thoughtful, caring lover of his past could be evil and yet the other part feared it was true. Draco's father had insisted upon it, scorning their relationship from the start. Harry had watched how it tore his beloved apart--whether it was the physical pain (no doubt from Lucius' whip) or the emotional distance later on. Draco had a choice to make, whether or not he wanted to be evil, and Harry didn't want to impede his decision. So because he loved him, he let him go.

I'VE BEEN WAITING ON YOU FOR A LONG TIME

He had expected Draco to be more persistent (like at the start of their relationship), but he only tried to come back once. Harry assumed Draco gave up, decided Harry wasn't worth it and became a Voldemort groupie after all. Harry moved away and cut off most of his wizarding friends in fear of encountering Draco. He figured he would see the world a bit, meet new people, find someone else to love. Harry didn't realize, though, that his heart was still (and always would be) connected to Draco's and he was only going through the motions.

FUELING UP ON HEARTACHES AND CHEAP WINE

Dates came and went, a flurry of men, half of whom Harry didn't remember. Nobody stuck around long enough to make an impression since he was obviously distant. Harry thought, as people had told him, that time would heal all wounds, but with time it got worse. Every minute he missed Draco more than the last. It was like he was slowly drowning and there was nothing he could do to stop it.

I AIN'T HEARD FROM YOU IN THREE DAMN NIGHTS

It had been three fucking days already--was he just never home? Harry had tried the hotel, his flat, even his parent's house (that was torturous for sure). Still nothing from his Draco. He's probably avoiding the phone, Harry thought sadly as he stared at his favorite picture of the two of them, at the lake near his godfather's house. Draco was tan and topless, lithe quidditch muscles evident from even a photograph. Harry had been lying on the grass near the water when Draco surprised him from behind with a quick kiss on the cheek. It had taken Harry a minute to realize Draco had a camera in his hand to capture the perfect moment.

I PUT YOUR PICTURE AWAY

Harry couldn't bear to look at that face anymore, it was killing him inside to not be able to kiss Draco, to touch him, to see him everyday. He stared at the picture--the look of surprise and excitement on his own face, the crazed yet content expression on his lover's. it was too bad he couldn't live in that wondrous moment forever; worriless, without heartbreak and sadness everyday.

I WONDER WHERE YOU'VE BEEN

Did Draco move on? What did he do after they broke up? Where did he go? Who did he meet? What did he see? So many things that Harry didn't know the answer to. The most important question, however, is more 'where is he now?'. It had been days since he had left messages for Draco and still no reply. Has he really moved on?

I CAN'T LOOK AT YOU WHILE I'M LYING NEXT TO HIM

He did not consider himself to be loose where sex was concerned, but he was also far from abstinent. Harry did not care about the man he slept with on occasion, it was a necessity, a means of escape and distraction. He knew that, he understood Harry, because he too was in love with someone else.

I PUT YOUR PICTURE AWAY

Harry took the photo out of it's hiding place and put it on the table in front of him, it was easier to go insane if he had a face to talk to (he was already talking to himself).

I WONDER WHERE YOU BEEN

Harry was beginning to believe Draco had moved on, since it had been way past the appropriate time of response to his messages. Weeks, a month, he must have gotten them by now. Still no call, not a sign. Harry had come back to town, seen Draco, called him, and he didn't respond. That had to mean something. So Harry, acting very much unlike him, threw himself at the first available guy.

I CAN'T LOOK AT YOU WHILE I'M LYING NEXT TO HIM

He felt ashamed. He knew Draco had moved on and yet he felt guilty for sleeping with this stranger--that is something that he doesn't do, he felt rotten, dirty. Unsurprisingly, the guy had already left by the time Harry had awoken from a nightmare. In it Draco had been calling for his help, but when Harry ran to him he never got anywhere. It scared him.

I SAW YOU YESTERDAY WITH AN OLD FRIEND

Harry had called Hermione in need of some friendly counseling. Ron was taking their kids to see Charlie so she welcomed the outing. After strolling through the city for a while, eating lunch in a little bistro, and spending a fortune on his godchildren, Harry felt a little better. He hadn't seen much of his best friends lately and he needed to remedy that. He explained his Draco situation and she simplified things and offered suggestions in her typical Hermione-way. He decided to think on them some more before trying anything out. Then they ran into Draco.

IT WAS THE SAME OLE SAME 'HOW HAVE YOU BEEN?'

Draco was tired of this charade of aloofness, pretending not to care took more energy than caring in his opinion. He missed Harry and his corny love poems, their late night chats and frantic kisses. But he didn't let on, he asked how they were doing, never once mentioning the messages he had received from Harry and neglected. He would never be able to settle for half of Harry, he wanted all of him. Being friends would never cut it for Draco, so he didn't call him back to 'catch up on old times'.

SINCE YOU'VE BEEN GONE MY WORLD'S BEEN DARK AND GREY

He thought about ending it all again. His life was meaningless, why bother living at all? He couldn't have his Draco, he didn't want to have anyone, no life at all. Draco was his entire life, his entire reason for living, and it was obvious he didn't feel the same about Harry. He swallowed a bunch of pills and awaited death. He would never get his wish, he took a bunch of sugar pills from Fred and George by accident. Fuck it allhe swore as he came back out of the bathroom. Nothing ever goes as planned.

YOU REMINDED ME OF BRIGHTER DAYS

Draco thought it might be easier to follow in his father's footsteps--at least then he wouldn't have to feel any pain, he wouldn't have to feel anything at all. He could forget about it and ignore Harry ever existed. Now, seeing him again in the market with Hermione, he thought about the summers spent on the lake, the trips to the city with friends, the great times they had together in their Seventh Year, their first time together. Of course, that's all they were--memories. And those eventually fade away.

I HOPED YOU WERE COMING HOME TO STAY

Harry, always the romantic, thought it was fate that allowed Draco and him to meet up again. Kismet. Maybe, just maybe, things would go back to the way they were beforethat would be the greatest gift Harry had ever gotten. Love.

I WAS HEADING TO CHURCH

Harry almost ran there after a hasty goodbye to Hermione. He had not been extremely religious while living with the Durselys. But he figured a little faith might help cure him of his depression. He lit a candle and prayed his heart out, imagining a life where anything was possible. Where he and Draco would be together forever, happy and love. Soul mates. He went to confession and told his sins of the past couple weeks, cleansing his palate to get Draco back.

I WAS OFF TO DRINK YOU AWAY

Back to the bar. This was becoming a bad habit of his. Yet Draco found it comforting and pleasurable, so it couldn't be all that bad. Drowning his sorrows over Harry with all his favorite men-Jose, Jack, and Jim. His mind started to wander to the day they broke up

I THOUGHT ABOUT YOU FOR A LONG TIME

It had been years and Draco still remembered everything about Harry, down to the most obsolete details. He liked sugar in his coffee. He hated horror movies and was a closet disco fan. He enjoyed soaps and talk shows, not the action-dramas Draco watched. God, how he missed that boy.

CAN'T SEEM TO GET YOU OFF MY MIND

Drinking for hours was supposed to make Draco forget about Harry but unfortunately it made things worse so that Harry was the only thing he was thinking about. He remembered their favorite songs, favorite foods, favorite ways to have fun together. Nothing could seem to shut off the flood of memories Draco had repressed for so long.

I CAN'T UNDERSTAND WHY WE'RE LIVING LIFE THIS WAY

Draco had never understood why it was that Harry had decided to end their relationship so abruptly. Harry's excuse of doing it for his own good was ridiculous. The only things he could think of was that either a) Harry didn't love him or b) Lucius got to him and made him end it somehow. Since the first option hurt too much to consider, he opted for the second since he hated his father already anyway. Lucius had wanted him to be like him, act like him, think like him. He couldn't deal with the fact that Draco had changed (for the better) into the man he was meant to be with just one kiss from a green-eyed boy. He had loved Harry and thought it was mutual. Maybe that was the problem, he was badly mistaken

I FOUND YOUR PICTURE TODAY

He stared at the picture on the windowsill and promised himself he would talk to Harry, hear what he needed to say about everything, and determine a plan of action to getting him back. Draco would not take this lying down, he was a Slytherin, dammit! He started to get angry at Harry having some invisible power over him so that he could terminate their relationship in the first place. Wasn't there two people involved here? What if he simply refused to accept it?

I SWEAR I'LL CHANGE MY WAYS

He decided to give up sleeping around first, since that was more important. That worked out fine so far, so he tried lessening the amount of alcohol he consumed in a day. It was a start, a way to prove to Harry that he would do anything for him, change everything.

I JUST CALLED TO SAY I WANT YOU TO COME BACK HOME

Draco left a message for Harry to meet him at his flat to catch up on old times. He had told him he missed him just to add the hint of reconciliation, to warm him up to the idea. Now, to set the stage, everything had to be perfect

I FOUND YOUR PICTURE TODAY

Harry looked at the photo again, not sure how long he had been staring at it again. More precisely, he was staring at Draco's lips. He tried to recall exactly how they felt, how they tasted, but he couldn't and that caused him to panic. That saddened him more than the fact that he wasn't kissing Draco anymore, all he had was his memories and he didn't even have those anymore. Why did everything have to be so complicated?

I SWEAR I'LL CHANGE MY WAYS

Harry decided right then and there that he would make a conscious effort to get back together with Draco, really talk to him about absolutely everything. No more white lies, vague answers to questions, Harry would completely open himself up for rejection; vulnerability would be his selling point. From here on out, he was a changed man.

I JUST CALLED TO SAY I WANT YOU TO COME BACK HOME

Harry wasn't sure what to think of Draco's message. 'I miss you' he replayed again and again until the machine broke. This was the omen he had been waiting for--there was still hope! Harry just had to make sure he didn't screw it up this time.

I JUST CALLED TO SAY I LOVE YOU, COME BACK HOME

Harry walked into Draco's place with a tentative smile. Then he surveyed the room and knew right then that Draco wanted him back too. Maybe it was the candles, the champagne on the counter, or the way Draco looked, stunning in a silver silk shirt that Harry had given him for Christmas years ago. He knew that everything would be alright. So he walked up to Draco and kissed him with as much passion as he could muster. And Draco responded with just as much warmth. He had come home.

~*~

Yay! Mushy Ending!