November 2, 7384
Dear diary forgive me, for it has taken many days to begin to write my story. In the end, though fear won out, for if I do not write I am afraid I might burst. The first memory you should get a sense of is when I was roughly 5 or 6. Elves age the same as humans until they reach the age of 7, so my sister was at the same level as me.
It is a pretty picture, that memory paints in my head. Golden leaves everywhere, jumping into piles and getting them stuck in my hair. We run around like there is no sense of time and soon some other, more braver (which means mostly boys, most of the girls in Lorion are snobby, until they begin to be tested) elves join in. It's all really fun and there is no sense of time. It might have been days, for the treetops are always shaded and in the summer it can become hard to tell if it is night or day, if our parents hadn't come to tell us to eat, we could have stayed like that for years. My dearest, earliest memory.
But then things began to change. It became darker than normal, not just in the sky, but also in our hearts. We began to grow up quickly, us children of the first age of man. There had been no other elves before us who had aged, mentally so fast. Rumors began to come, that are sister wood, Mirkwood had been attacked. Communication was shut off, and worse no one knew why. People said giant spiders ate our messengers in Mirkwood. To this day I do not know whether it was spiders that killed them, or the fear and broken hearts brought on by the devestation they must have surely seen in Mirkwood. For there were more bodies than even gossip could accumulate in our imagination. But enough of this, at the time we did not know what had become of Mirkwood, and we lay at night dreaming about it.
There are other, more harsh memories in between, which I hope to one day let go, hopefully soon, but can not let go just yet. Let's jump, shall we maybe, maybe 20 yars to my 25th birthday. I still looked seven though. Everyone knew I was half-elven, they could tell by my eyes, though my mother would never admit to betraying my father. And I could see the questions in their eyes, too. No one knew who was older, only that our "parents" had given us the same month and year, one day inbetween. No one knew who was the older by a day, either because every other year we'd switch off. We were a family driven by numbers.
Everyone also knew half-elvens were as good as humans, when it came to ageing, until they are old enough to decide which they are to become. I always felt that sad, because if they chose to be elves, like Elrond, they lost their elven childhoods. But I still looked young, so people pretended around me and my sister, smiling and laughing right along with us. Because they were not at all bad people, they were just too weak to avoid gossiping, and too ignorant, or foolish to know it would eventually become cruel. But not yet. What's remarkeable about this birthday, is that I got what I wished for. Elves rarely get what they wish for. I is a mere fancy, that wishing to the valor will get you what you want. Similar to praying in the new religions springing up. Just a fancy. And being half-elven (for as I got older no one could deny that I looked nothing like my father, nor did anyone in our family have green eyes for as far as we could remember, which would be very far, since we are after all elves) did not even have the gift of the valor yet (assuming I was going to choose it, after all). I should not have gotten what I wanted but I did. I wanted a white horse, unheard of since elves did not get their elves until they were the equivilent in physical appearence to a 13 year old human (elves do not always age the same, some take longer in some stages, than others). I wanted a white baby horse with silvery hair that rode like the wind which I could call gillie!!!! Or "silver-like-wind if I decided to speak western (these are two completely different names for the horse. The first one has no meaning gillie was just easy for my young mind). I got the horse, exactly the way the one I prayed for looked like. And I hadn't told anyone I had wanted it, for fear of being laughed at. That was when I first learned it was possible, to get what I want.
Please tell me if you like it. Orhate it. Either way I am in love with reviews. So PLEASE review. And while your at it, if by some strange chance, you really like this story, could you read one of my other ones???? Like anyone will actually like it. But thanx for the reviews I got so far.
