Yu-Gi-Oh does not believe me, it belongs to Kazuki Takahashi.
Too Late
By Rian
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I love him.
I've always loved him, actually. From the moment I saw him, I loved him. I didn't know at first, of course. How could I? I was just spell-bound by the beautiful young man who had appeared in my mind when I solved my puzzle.
But he treated me, though admittedly some justification, as a weakling. I certainly couldn't duel very well at that point. But, after Duelist Kingdom and Battle City, he admitted I had skill. A lot of it.
I don't know why, but that compliment warmed my heart more than any other compliment given to me had.
Because it was from *him.*
And that made it special.
But he still didn't seem to care about me--at least, not in the way I wanted him to. He didn't show anything to me except for a kind of comradeship, which didn't--still doesn't, actually--satisfy me. I wanted more.
But... he didn't seem to care. After a while, I started hanging out with Kaiba--sorry, *Seto*--more. He wanted me to stop calling him Kaiba, but it was still hard.
In any case, we started hanging out more. I got to know him a lot better, finding out things about him that no one, except for maybe Mokuba, knew. Like about his abusive stepfather.
If I had known what had happened to Seto, maybe I would have been kinder to him. I feel bad about that now. But that doesn't matter.
I found out a lot about him. And eventually, I found out why Seto always seemed to be around me, challenging me, trying to be better than me. He eventually told me... it was to win my respect. To gain my approval.
To put it bluntly, I was astounded. I couldn't believe it. He... liked me? Like that? Before then, I couldn't imagine liking another boy. I mean, Seto? I couldn't even imagine it.
But... after a while... I started having feelings for him, too. He didn't tell me he loved me, though. That was one thing I wanted. To be told I was loved.
I didn't think I loved Seto, anyway. I was still in love with my other.
Then was the time that we... well, we fucked. I can't believe I just said that, but I did. It's kind of a crass way to put it, but that's what we did.
Gods, I never imagined that you could do that...
I never told my other about it. I thought he knew, to be honest. I thought he was interested in Anzu, which shows how stupid I am. Looking back, I can tell how he always brushed her off, and how much it frustrated her. She was trying so *hard*...
But that doesn't matter. He wasn't even suspicious about why I seemed so happy... or why I my butt was so sore...
We did it again, the next night. We were getting closer and closer, and not just emotionally. I was growing--hell, I still am growing! I'm almost as tall as Seto, now. As tall as my other.
No one seemed to notice, until Ryou spoke to me about it. About my closeness to Seto, I mean. He mentioned that we seemed to get along better, so I told him. I couldn't help it; it just... slipped out. Ryou seemed to understand, but when Bakura appeared next to him, on the ground, laughing like a maniac, I had a feeling things might go amiss.
Jou and Honda found out about it next, and from Mokuba, of all people. He has a rather big mouth, but I still couldn't believe it. They were cool with it, though.
But I still cared about my other.
All right, dammit! I love him. I still do. I can't get rid of it. I don't know why I love him, either. He's just so strong, so courageous... I wish I were like that. But Seto seemed to like me just the way I was, so I guess it shouldn't have mattered. But it did. It does. I want him to look at me the way Seto does. I want him to care about me, to sleep with me, to cradle me in his arms, and to thank me for having sex. But he doesn't.
And I'm too scared to tell him. Frightened. I don't think he likes me; for all know, he could be straight. I didn't know what to do, how to tell him, and I didn't want to hurt Seto.
So weeks passed. Then months. Now six months have passed, and I'm tired of waiting. All his coolness, his unreachable attitude... I don't think he loves me. But I still love him. But that doesn't matter. I love Kaiba, too. Gods help me, I love both. But only one loves me.
I chose Seto.
So I came into his room, flushing. As I ask him to come with me to Kaiba Corp., he looks slightly suspicious. But he comes.
As we walk, I get even more nervous, though I had thought that was impossible. He turns to me and demands an explanation of why we're going to Kaiba Corp., but I won't answer. It's taking all my courage to come to Seto and tell him that I love him, and telling my other will be even more nerve-wracking.
Now he's fuming, getting angry. I can't help but smile sadly at his grumbling. I love him... but he doesn't care about me. I just wish he knew....
We walk into the building, and I ask to see Seto. My other is getting kind of pale and antisocial, but I'm trying to ignore him while I try to figure out how to tell Seto.
We get directed to Seto's office (the secretary recognizes me, I know) and there he is--my other love. The one that actually... that might... love...
Dammit, I can't even think it. What if he doesn't love me? What if he doesn't? I don't know if I could stand it if he didn't. But it's too late.
He looks up and smiles, that beautiful smile, just for me. He sees my other and his face darkens slightly, but he gets up and motions to a two-seater couch. I can't help but notice that he doesn't offer a seat to my other, but I'm too scared to point it out. Let him figure it out.
Then Seto smiles at me, with that beautiful smile that I just can't get enough of, and asks me, in his gorgeous, deep voice, if I need anything.
I'm terrified, but I have enough wits to glance at my other. He looks frightened, though I can't figure out why. Then I turn back to look at my lover, and tell him, in as steady a voice as I can manage, that I need him to listen, because I'm going to tell him something very important.
He nods, his perfect blue eyes completely trusting, and I blurt it out. "I love you." I wince; hardly eloquent. Talk about embarrassment. I want to look away in shame, but for some reason, I can't stop looking at my lover's eyes. My eyes are starting to water; he isn't saying anything. He looks shocked.
Suddenly my heart falls. He doesn't love me; he was just using me as a... a... a fuck toy. I want to cry, but then he smiles gently, leaning forward, holding my hands, to kiss me softly on the mouth. It feels heavenly, like a touch of rain. Not at all like our usual kisses.
Then he says it. "I love you, as well. I always have."
I can't believe it. He loves me, too? He has? Always? I can't understand... why didn't he tell me? Then he leans forward and embraces me. I can't help but embrace him back, my tears finally flowing out of my eyes. I can't believe this. He loves me back? He... he loves me! He loves me! Then, I suddenly remember about my other.
Shit, I think. He's gonna--
Then I hear the door slamming shut. Seto and I spring apart in shock, turning to see my other sprinting down the stairs.
I can't help but sigh, turning back to Seto. That was probably a shock to him, I think wryly.
I turn to Seto, smiling sadly. "I'm sorry, I... I don't know what came over him." He chuckles, but it sounds... forced, almost, and his face is somehow apprehensive. I look at him questioningly, and he flushes.
"I... uh... dammit, I don't know how to say this..." he mutters, turning away. I look at him, still confused, and he groans.
"What the fuck." I'm not surprised as his choice of words, but I am surprised--greatly so--when he suddenly gets down on his knees before me.
"S-Seto...?"
"Hush," he replies, his face softening, showing his gentler, more vulnerable side. I can't help but love him as he flushes, adjusting his shirt. "I... um... shit, how do I say this..."
I smile and put my hand on his arm, and he starts guiltily, a sheepish expression on his beautiful visage. "Sorry, love... I just... oh, what the hell. Here."
He holds out his hand, and I gasp, my eyes widening. In his hand is a small box, not unlike those boxes you find in toy stores, but with beautiful blue velvet covering. I look up at him, unsure, and he smiles, albeit somewhat anxiously, and motions at me with it.
"Take it."
His face is turning pale, and I can't help but giggle at the expression on his face. He looks at me pleadingly, and I take the box.
He watches me anxiously as I take it in my small hands, opening carefully, then almost drop in in astonishment. "Wh-what the fuck!?" I think I've been hanging around with him to much.
He looks at me hopefully, fear in his gorgeous blue eyes. "You... you don't have to reply right off--" he begins, then he chokes as I throw my arms around him.
"Of... of course!" I finally cry in his ear, my eyes filling with tears. "Oh, gods, Seto... I never imagined...! I always thought..."
He smiles, looking relieved, though unsure. "So... what do you say...?"
I can't help but cry at the fear I hear in his voice. "Of course, you idiot!" I exclaim, my eyesight blurry. Then I pause, fear creeping into my voice. "I... I mean... as long as this means what I think it means..."
He flushes. "I'm such an asshole," he mutters, settling back on one knee. Looking up at me, holding one of my hands, he speaks. "Will... will you marry me?"
My heart stops. Did... did he just say what I think he did, I think vaguely. "Will... will I marry you...?" I echo stupidly.
He nods, fear creeping into his visage, and suddenly I laugh, flinging my arms around him once more. "Yes!" I whisper brokenly, hugging him to my chest. He looks at me, still unsure, and I grin, not caring what the hell I look like. "Yes!" I exclaim, louder, then I kiss him, right on the mouth.
He gapes at me like a fish, then tears appear in his eyes, and he kisses me back. "Th-thank you," he whispers, holding me tightly in his arms. "I... I was so worried that you would say no, or that you thought of me only as a fuck toy..."
The irony strikes me, and I laugh. He looks at me, slightly wary, and I laugh again, though I feel bad for him. "I..." I choke suddenly, and he looks worried, holding me as I choke. "I'm sorry," I finally grind out, still trying to contain my laughter, "it's just that... I had been thinking the exact same thing before, as I told you..." I start laughing again, and this time he joins me, the worry erasing from his face.
Ten minutes later I walk home, still giddy with excitement. I can't stop looking at my engagement ring. I can't believe it! I feel like I'm floating, and I want to share with someone...
I hit myself in the head, starting to run home. Of course. My other self. He'll want to hear all about it, I know.
I walk into his room, surprised that it's dark. I sit next to him, trying to figure out how to tell him without bursting with joy. Then I look at him, I mean *really* look at him, and frown. Are those tear marks on his face. "Have you been crying?" Inwardly I cringe at how stupid that sounds, but he doesn't seem to care.
"No."
I look at him suspiciously, then dismiss it from my mind. "He asked me to marry him! Finally asked; finally! I said yes, of course, but...! Oh, this is like a dream come true!" I can't hold it in any more; I jump up and twirl in the air, joy filling my heart.
He looks blank, then suddenly his eyes widen, and I feel a sudden forboding. "*Marriage?!*" He looks shocked. "How long have you two been...?"
I look at him curiously. He seems to be hanging on to my answer. Oh, well. I beam at him. "About five months. Why?"
"Why... why didn't you tell me?" He chokes out.
I blink. *That* wasn't the reaction I was expecting. "Un? I thought you knew! Everybody else does."
He snorts, looking down, and I figure I should volunteer more information. "We... we've been together for nearly six, though," I add, blushing deeply. It's still hard for me to talk about Seto and I having sex...
"*WHAT!?*"
I give him a funny look. What's he freaking out about? He doesn't care about me, does he? I shake my head mentally, then smile and continue. "I didn't really think I loved him, though... the idea of actually *loving* him--a man, not a girl! A man!--shook me up, at first, but then I realized that I do love him. With all my heart and soul. I would die for him." And it's the truth, I realize dimly. I *do* love him. I do love Seto. I *would* die for him.
I keep talking, but I notice that he's not listening. What's his problem? Why isn't he happy for me? I can't help but feel annoyed.
"So," I say loudly, to get his attention, "we're finally getting married, after all this time! Do you think we should have the wedding in the spring? Seto actually prefers the summer, but..." I trail off, not sure as of what to say next.
He looks dead. "That's... great."
I blink. 'That's great'? That's all? Not what I was expecting to hear, not by a long shot! Whatever... "What's wrong?" I pout, putting on my adorable puppy-dog eyes that always crumble Seto's resolve. "I thought you'd be happy for me!"
He looks at me sadly, and I look back at him, feeling rather impatient. "Well?"
He still looks at me, and my heart softens a bit. I still love him, but... I can't. I love Seto more. I... I just got tired of waiting. I look at him impatiently, and he starts, as if remembering that I'm waiting for a reply.
"What do you want me to do?" He finally says, a subued expression appearing.
I screw up my face, feeling thoughtful. "I dunno." Then I look at him closely again, and feel a headache coming on. Those *are* tear marks. I know it. What the hell? I frown at him. "You have been crying," I accuse him. "Your eyes are all red, and you have a half-glazed look in them." I glare at him. "What's wrong?"
"What the hell does that mean?!" He finally screams at me, his face turning red, furious. "He's all wrong for you! He's... he's *Kaiba*! Kaiba isn't good enough for you!"
I can't believe this. What a petty thing to say! What the hell has gotten into him?! "Then who is." I don't feel like being my regular self; I'm sick and tired of his little tantrum. My voice is icy, even as I feel my heart weeping at causing him pain.
"I... uh..." He has an uncertain look on his face and his tone is tremulous, but I'm still waiting. "...I don't know."
Even as he says it, I know he doesn't believe it. He's still hiding something. My heart clenches, even as I know that I'm going to end up with Seto. I'm sorry...
Maybe gentle teasing will coax it out... "What, don't tell me you're in love with me, or something," I say, smiling hopefully. I'm teasing him, hoping to make him smile.
He stiffens, looking away. I feel like I've been wacked in the head with a crowbar. "No." I suck in a breath, unsure of what to say. "You can't. You don't..." I don't know what to say. Is this really happening?! He... he loves me?! This has got to be some kind of nightmare!
"Why didn't you tell me?" I finally choke out.
He still won't look at me. "I don't know."
Suddenly it strikes me how petulent, how immature he's being, and I lose my temper. "What does that mean? Well, I'm sorry your feelings are hurt, but I'm getting married to Seto!" Even as I speak, I hear his heart freeze. But I can't stop; the words just spill out. Even as they fall off my tongue, I long to go over to him, to hold him, and to tell him that it's all right, but I can't stop... "I can only hope you don't do anything stupid while you wallow in your self-pity!"
I can tell, just by the set of his back, that I have set him off. He turns to face me, his visage blank with rage and pain. "Excu-u-u-use me?!" I wince, he's about to yell at me. "What do you mean by that? I hope you enjoy your wedding, you fuckup, I really do! Now get lost! I never wanna see your fucking face again!"
My eyes widen. "You... you can't mean that...!"
He looks dead serious. "I sure as hell do! Now get lost! Leave! Go off with that bastard, Kaiba, and fuck him till you fucking drop! I don't care! Get lost!"
My face drains itself of colour, then turns red. It hurts to hear him insult me, but I can't--I won't--allow him to insult Seto. "How... how could you...?" I whisper, my face mournful, then I mentally shake myself. If he really feels like that, fine. He'll get it. "I-I hate you," I whisper in a low, raw voice, then turn and run from the room, tears pouring from my eyes.
I run to my room, which is right next to the bathroom, and collapse on my bed, sobbing. How... how could he? Does he really hate me that much? I can't believe it... I won't... but...
I sit up, my tears suddenly dry, my senses alert. What was that thump...?
I run to the bathroom door, listening. I hear something moving around in there, then a muffled gasp of pain. I don't know what's going on in there, but I don't think it's good. I try the door; it's unlocked. That's good. He never did figure out how to use the locks...
I open the door, and gasp. There lies my other, on his back in the bathtub, long, angry-looking rips in his arms, gushing crimson-red blood. I force my feet to work, my mind running in different directions at once. "*HOLD ON!*" I scream, running towards him, cradling his head in my arms. His eyes are glazing over, but as he turns them slowly, oh so slowly, towards me, I see them clear a little.
Weakly, his arms shaking, obviously with the last of his strength, he reaches up to me, his eyes glazing over again. "I love you, my precious... my... I... I love..." His hand strokes my cheek gently, the heavy scarlet blood mixing with the tears coursing down my face, and I feel--literally *feel*--the life drifting away from his body.
"Oh, by the gods," I finally choke out, my voice raw and husky, tears blurring my vision, "don't leave me!" I plead with him voicelessly, hoping against hope that he'll wake up, tell me it's just a joke...
His eyes are completely glazed over, now, a thin film covering the retina, and I know, with sick certainy, that this is not a joke. His eyes slowly roll back, and as they do, I let out one last cry of sorrow, knowing that my cry will never be heard.
*"NNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!"*
Fin
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By Rian
Kawaii_Nekochan21@yahoo.com
Nihao! This is kind of a different POV on the whole 'Too Late' fic. How did you like it? I kind of re-did the original 'Too Late', as well, so I hope you liked it!
By the way, yes, this is Yami and Yuugi. Heheh! Was it that obvious? Okies, just so you know, it was Yami that died. Isn't that sad? I don't know what possessed me to write this. Must be some kind of fluke...
In any case, tell me how you liked it ^_^ Maybe... just maybe... I'll write more. *Grins* Feedback, kids! Feedback! Thankies... ja ne, Rian~
Too Late
By Rian
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I love him.
I've always loved him, actually. From the moment I saw him, I loved him. I didn't know at first, of course. How could I? I was just spell-bound by the beautiful young man who had appeared in my mind when I solved my puzzle.
But he treated me, though admittedly some justification, as a weakling. I certainly couldn't duel very well at that point. But, after Duelist Kingdom and Battle City, he admitted I had skill. A lot of it.
I don't know why, but that compliment warmed my heart more than any other compliment given to me had.
Because it was from *him.*
And that made it special.
But he still didn't seem to care about me--at least, not in the way I wanted him to. He didn't show anything to me except for a kind of comradeship, which didn't--still doesn't, actually--satisfy me. I wanted more.
But... he didn't seem to care. After a while, I started hanging out with Kaiba--sorry, *Seto*--more. He wanted me to stop calling him Kaiba, but it was still hard.
In any case, we started hanging out more. I got to know him a lot better, finding out things about him that no one, except for maybe Mokuba, knew. Like about his abusive stepfather.
If I had known what had happened to Seto, maybe I would have been kinder to him. I feel bad about that now. But that doesn't matter.
I found out a lot about him. And eventually, I found out why Seto always seemed to be around me, challenging me, trying to be better than me. He eventually told me... it was to win my respect. To gain my approval.
To put it bluntly, I was astounded. I couldn't believe it. He... liked me? Like that? Before then, I couldn't imagine liking another boy. I mean, Seto? I couldn't even imagine it.
But... after a while... I started having feelings for him, too. He didn't tell me he loved me, though. That was one thing I wanted. To be told I was loved.
I didn't think I loved Seto, anyway. I was still in love with my other.
Then was the time that we... well, we fucked. I can't believe I just said that, but I did. It's kind of a crass way to put it, but that's what we did.
Gods, I never imagined that you could do that...
I never told my other about it. I thought he knew, to be honest. I thought he was interested in Anzu, which shows how stupid I am. Looking back, I can tell how he always brushed her off, and how much it frustrated her. She was trying so *hard*...
But that doesn't matter. He wasn't even suspicious about why I seemed so happy... or why I my butt was so sore...
We did it again, the next night. We were getting closer and closer, and not just emotionally. I was growing--hell, I still am growing! I'm almost as tall as Seto, now. As tall as my other.
No one seemed to notice, until Ryou spoke to me about it. About my closeness to Seto, I mean. He mentioned that we seemed to get along better, so I told him. I couldn't help it; it just... slipped out. Ryou seemed to understand, but when Bakura appeared next to him, on the ground, laughing like a maniac, I had a feeling things might go amiss.
Jou and Honda found out about it next, and from Mokuba, of all people. He has a rather big mouth, but I still couldn't believe it. They were cool with it, though.
But I still cared about my other.
All right, dammit! I love him. I still do. I can't get rid of it. I don't know why I love him, either. He's just so strong, so courageous... I wish I were like that. But Seto seemed to like me just the way I was, so I guess it shouldn't have mattered. But it did. It does. I want him to look at me the way Seto does. I want him to care about me, to sleep with me, to cradle me in his arms, and to thank me for having sex. But he doesn't.
And I'm too scared to tell him. Frightened. I don't think he likes me; for all know, he could be straight. I didn't know what to do, how to tell him, and I didn't want to hurt Seto.
So weeks passed. Then months. Now six months have passed, and I'm tired of waiting. All his coolness, his unreachable attitude... I don't think he loves me. But I still love him. But that doesn't matter. I love Kaiba, too. Gods help me, I love both. But only one loves me.
I chose Seto.
So I came into his room, flushing. As I ask him to come with me to Kaiba Corp., he looks slightly suspicious. But he comes.
As we walk, I get even more nervous, though I had thought that was impossible. He turns to me and demands an explanation of why we're going to Kaiba Corp., but I won't answer. It's taking all my courage to come to Seto and tell him that I love him, and telling my other will be even more nerve-wracking.
Now he's fuming, getting angry. I can't help but smile sadly at his grumbling. I love him... but he doesn't care about me. I just wish he knew....
We walk into the building, and I ask to see Seto. My other is getting kind of pale and antisocial, but I'm trying to ignore him while I try to figure out how to tell Seto.
We get directed to Seto's office (the secretary recognizes me, I know) and there he is--my other love. The one that actually... that might... love...
Dammit, I can't even think it. What if he doesn't love me? What if he doesn't? I don't know if I could stand it if he didn't. But it's too late.
He looks up and smiles, that beautiful smile, just for me. He sees my other and his face darkens slightly, but he gets up and motions to a two-seater couch. I can't help but notice that he doesn't offer a seat to my other, but I'm too scared to point it out. Let him figure it out.
Then Seto smiles at me, with that beautiful smile that I just can't get enough of, and asks me, in his gorgeous, deep voice, if I need anything.
I'm terrified, but I have enough wits to glance at my other. He looks frightened, though I can't figure out why. Then I turn back to look at my lover, and tell him, in as steady a voice as I can manage, that I need him to listen, because I'm going to tell him something very important.
He nods, his perfect blue eyes completely trusting, and I blurt it out. "I love you." I wince; hardly eloquent. Talk about embarrassment. I want to look away in shame, but for some reason, I can't stop looking at my lover's eyes. My eyes are starting to water; he isn't saying anything. He looks shocked.
Suddenly my heart falls. He doesn't love me; he was just using me as a... a... a fuck toy. I want to cry, but then he smiles gently, leaning forward, holding my hands, to kiss me softly on the mouth. It feels heavenly, like a touch of rain. Not at all like our usual kisses.
Then he says it. "I love you, as well. I always have."
I can't believe it. He loves me, too? He has? Always? I can't understand... why didn't he tell me? Then he leans forward and embraces me. I can't help but embrace him back, my tears finally flowing out of my eyes. I can't believe this. He loves me back? He... he loves me! He loves me! Then, I suddenly remember about my other.
Shit, I think. He's gonna--
Then I hear the door slamming shut. Seto and I spring apart in shock, turning to see my other sprinting down the stairs.
I can't help but sigh, turning back to Seto. That was probably a shock to him, I think wryly.
I turn to Seto, smiling sadly. "I'm sorry, I... I don't know what came over him." He chuckles, but it sounds... forced, almost, and his face is somehow apprehensive. I look at him questioningly, and he flushes.
"I... uh... dammit, I don't know how to say this..." he mutters, turning away. I look at him, still confused, and he groans.
"What the fuck." I'm not surprised as his choice of words, but I am surprised--greatly so--when he suddenly gets down on his knees before me.
"S-Seto...?"
"Hush," he replies, his face softening, showing his gentler, more vulnerable side. I can't help but love him as he flushes, adjusting his shirt. "I... um... shit, how do I say this..."
I smile and put my hand on his arm, and he starts guiltily, a sheepish expression on his beautiful visage. "Sorry, love... I just... oh, what the hell. Here."
He holds out his hand, and I gasp, my eyes widening. In his hand is a small box, not unlike those boxes you find in toy stores, but with beautiful blue velvet covering. I look up at him, unsure, and he smiles, albeit somewhat anxiously, and motions at me with it.
"Take it."
His face is turning pale, and I can't help but giggle at the expression on his face. He looks at me pleadingly, and I take the box.
He watches me anxiously as I take it in my small hands, opening carefully, then almost drop in in astonishment. "Wh-what the fuck!?" I think I've been hanging around with him to much.
He looks at me hopefully, fear in his gorgeous blue eyes. "You... you don't have to reply right off--" he begins, then he chokes as I throw my arms around him.
"Of... of course!" I finally cry in his ear, my eyes filling with tears. "Oh, gods, Seto... I never imagined...! I always thought..."
He smiles, looking relieved, though unsure. "So... what do you say...?"
I can't help but cry at the fear I hear in his voice. "Of course, you idiot!" I exclaim, my eyesight blurry. Then I pause, fear creeping into my voice. "I... I mean... as long as this means what I think it means..."
He flushes. "I'm such an asshole," he mutters, settling back on one knee. Looking up at me, holding one of my hands, he speaks. "Will... will you marry me?"
My heart stops. Did... did he just say what I think he did, I think vaguely. "Will... will I marry you...?" I echo stupidly.
He nods, fear creeping into his visage, and suddenly I laugh, flinging my arms around him once more. "Yes!" I whisper brokenly, hugging him to my chest. He looks at me, still unsure, and I grin, not caring what the hell I look like. "Yes!" I exclaim, louder, then I kiss him, right on the mouth.
He gapes at me like a fish, then tears appear in his eyes, and he kisses me back. "Th-thank you," he whispers, holding me tightly in his arms. "I... I was so worried that you would say no, or that you thought of me only as a fuck toy..."
The irony strikes me, and I laugh. He looks at me, slightly wary, and I laugh again, though I feel bad for him. "I..." I choke suddenly, and he looks worried, holding me as I choke. "I'm sorry," I finally grind out, still trying to contain my laughter, "it's just that... I had been thinking the exact same thing before, as I told you..." I start laughing again, and this time he joins me, the worry erasing from his face.
Ten minutes later I walk home, still giddy with excitement. I can't stop looking at my engagement ring. I can't believe it! I feel like I'm floating, and I want to share with someone...
I hit myself in the head, starting to run home. Of course. My other self. He'll want to hear all about it, I know.
I walk into his room, surprised that it's dark. I sit next to him, trying to figure out how to tell him without bursting with joy. Then I look at him, I mean *really* look at him, and frown. Are those tear marks on his face. "Have you been crying?" Inwardly I cringe at how stupid that sounds, but he doesn't seem to care.
"No."
I look at him suspiciously, then dismiss it from my mind. "He asked me to marry him! Finally asked; finally! I said yes, of course, but...! Oh, this is like a dream come true!" I can't hold it in any more; I jump up and twirl in the air, joy filling my heart.
He looks blank, then suddenly his eyes widen, and I feel a sudden forboding. "*Marriage?!*" He looks shocked. "How long have you two been...?"
I look at him curiously. He seems to be hanging on to my answer. Oh, well. I beam at him. "About five months. Why?"
"Why... why didn't you tell me?" He chokes out.
I blink. *That* wasn't the reaction I was expecting. "Un? I thought you knew! Everybody else does."
He snorts, looking down, and I figure I should volunteer more information. "We... we've been together for nearly six, though," I add, blushing deeply. It's still hard for me to talk about Seto and I having sex...
"*WHAT!?*"
I give him a funny look. What's he freaking out about? He doesn't care about me, does he? I shake my head mentally, then smile and continue. "I didn't really think I loved him, though... the idea of actually *loving* him--a man, not a girl! A man!--shook me up, at first, but then I realized that I do love him. With all my heart and soul. I would die for him." And it's the truth, I realize dimly. I *do* love him. I do love Seto. I *would* die for him.
I keep talking, but I notice that he's not listening. What's his problem? Why isn't he happy for me? I can't help but feel annoyed.
"So," I say loudly, to get his attention, "we're finally getting married, after all this time! Do you think we should have the wedding in the spring? Seto actually prefers the summer, but..." I trail off, not sure as of what to say next.
He looks dead. "That's... great."
I blink. 'That's great'? That's all? Not what I was expecting to hear, not by a long shot! Whatever... "What's wrong?" I pout, putting on my adorable puppy-dog eyes that always crumble Seto's resolve. "I thought you'd be happy for me!"
He looks at me sadly, and I look back at him, feeling rather impatient. "Well?"
He still looks at me, and my heart softens a bit. I still love him, but... I can't. I love Seto more. I... I just got tired of waiting. I look at him impatiently, and he starts, as if remembering that I'm waiting for a reply.
"What do you want me to do?" He finally says, a subued expression appearing.
I screw up my face, feeling thoughtful. "I dunno." Then I look at him closely again, and feel a headache coming on. Those *are* tear marks. I know it. What the hell? I frown at him. "You have been crying," I accuse him. "Your eyes are all red, and you have a half-glazed look in them." I glare at him. "What's wrong?"
"What the hell does that mean?!" He finally screams at me, his face turning red, furious. "He's all wrong for you! He's... he's *Kaiba*! Kaiba isn't good enough for you!"
I can't believe this. What a petty thing to say! What the hell has gotten into him?! "Then who is." I don't feel like being my regular self; I'm sick and tired of his little tantrum. My voice is icy, even as I feel my heart weeping at causing him pain.
"I... uh..." He has an uncertain look on his face and his tone is tremulous, but I'm still waiting. "...I don't know."
Even as he says it, I know he doesn't believe it. He's still hiding something. My heart clenches, even as I know that I'm going to end up with Seto. I'm sorry...
Maybe gentle teasing will coax it out... "What, don't tell me you're in love with me, or something," I say, smiling hopefully. I'm teasing him, hoping to make him smile.
He stiffens, looking away. I feel like I've been wacked in the head with a crowbar. "No." I suck in a breath, unsure of what to say. "You can't. You don't..." I don't know what to say. Is this really happening?! He... he loves me?! This has got to be some kind of nightmare!
"Why didn't you tell me?" I finally choke out.
He still won't look at me. "I don't know."
Suddenly it strikes me how petulent, how immature he's being, and I lose my temper. "What does that mean? Well, I'm sorry your feelings are hurt, but I'm getting married to Seto!" Even as I speak, I hear his heart freeze. But I can't stop; the words just spill out. Even as they fall off my tongue, I long to go over to him, to hold him, and to tell him that it's all right, but I can't stop... "I can only hope you don't do anything stupid while you wallow in your self-pity!"
I can tell, just by the set of his back, that I have set him off. He turns to face me, his visage blank with rage and pain. "Excu-u-u-use me?!" I wince, he's about to yell at me. "What do you mean by that? I hope you enjoy your wedding, you fuckup, I really do! Now get lost! I never wanna see your fucking face again!"
My eyes widen. "You... you can't mean that...!"
He looks dead serious. "I sure as hell do! Now get lost! Leave! Go off with that bastard, Kaiba, and fuck him till you fucking drop! I don't care! Get lost!"
My face drains itself of colour, then turns red. It hurts to hear him insult me, but I can't--I won't--allow him to insult Seto. "How... how could you...?" I whisper, my face mournful, then I mentally shake myself. If he really feels like that, fine. He'll get it. "I-I hate you," I whisper in a low, raw voice, then turn and run from the room, tears pouring from my eyes.
I run to my room, which is right next to the bathroom, and collapse on my bed, sobbing. How... how could he? Does he really hate me that much? I can't believe it... I won't... but...
I sit up, my tears suddenly dry, my senses alert. What was that thump...?
I run to the bathroom door, listening. I hear something moving around in there, then a muffled gasp of pain. I don't know what's going on in there, but I don't think it's good. I try the door; it's unlocked. That's good. He never did figure out how to use the locks...
I open the door, and gasp. There lies my other, on his back in the bathtub, long, angry-looking rips in his arms, gushing crimson-red blood. I force my feet to work, my mind running in different directions at once. "*HOLD ON!*" I scream, running towards him, cradling his head in my arms. His eyes are glazing over, but as he turns them slowly, oh so slowly, towards me, I see them clear a little.
Weakly, his arms shaking, obviously with the last of his strength, he reaches up to me, his eyes glazing over again. "I love you, my precious... my... I... I love..." His hand strokes my cheek gently, the heavy scarlet blood mixing with the tears coursing down my face, and I feel--literally *feel*--the life drifting away from his body.
"Oh, by the gods," I finally choke out, my voice raw and husky, tears blurring my vision, "don't leave me!" I plead with him voicelessly, hoping against hope that he'll wake up, tell me it's just a joke...
His eyes are completely glazed over, now, a thin film covering the retina, and I know, with sick certainy, that this is not a joke. His eyes slowly roll back, and as they do, I let out one last cry of sorrow, knowing that my cry will never be heard.
*"NNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!"*
Fin
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By Rian
Kawaii_Nekochan21@yahoo.com
Nihao! This is kind of a different POV on the whole 'Too Late' fic. How did you like it? I kind of re-did the original 'Too Late', as well, so I hope you liked it!
By the way, yes, this is Yami and Yuugi. Heheh! Was it that obvious? Okies, just so you know, it was Yami that died. Isn't that sad? I don't know what possessed me to write this. Must be some kind of fluke...
In any case, tell me how you liked it ^_^ Maybe... just maybe... I'll write more. *Grins* Feedback, kids! Feedback! Thankies... ja ne, Rian~
