Chapter 5
"Whoa! You are one twisted puppy." And Xander is back in the game. Just gotta hope he's only after a talking part. Don't think I can take anymore of Action Xan Man tonight. "You could'a taken a walk in the sun, fallen on a stake. Hey, you could'a come to me - I would've been happy to help. But no, that's too honest for you. You have to go to the Wacko World of Wish- granters. Man, that's warped, even for you. Oh. Oh! Are you gonna get gutted? Can I watch?"
I get a glimpse of the old Spike 'cos he's looking at Xander with total contempt. I don't know who to side with on this one 'cos, hey, going to a vengeance demon? Not of the good. But wanting to watch the vengeance doesn't sound like ideal mental health either. I'm siding with Xander on the 'what was the vengeance' question, though.
And I'm getting that tense feeling again 'cos Anya has just stepped in between Xander and Spike. Okay, so I didn't rush to fill the role of Spike defender but. There's no need. Spike's loose and can get away from Xander if he needs to. Even if he didn't before. And, anyway, Xander's not being all threateny. Not really. And. and.. I was distracted! I was thinking about the vengeance thingy. I'd have snapped out of it if anything happened. So I would've done the defending thing if it was needed. Which it wasn't. Anya's being over-protective. Which is fine.
"Don't look at me like that, Buffy. I do not like being glared at. Your precious Xander is quite safe, but I will not let him hurt Spike. And you are very lucky that Spike is not vindictive. Xander could very easily be displaying his genitalia to all your neighbours right now.." Spike's looking at me with that tilt to his head that in no way makes him cute and curious. And his eyes aren't at all warm or loving. And he doesn't know what I'm thinking. He'd just better not smile at me, that's all I'm saying.
"Don't mind Buffy, pet. She just doesn't want any more drama on her front lawn. Let's get the storytelling done with, shall we?"
"You are too forgiving Spike. But I expect that's an unfortunate side effect of having a soul."
Why is the ground spinning?
-*-*-*-
"Buffy? Buffy, luv? C'mon pet, wake up"
Ummm, Spike hands. Stroking my face and hair. Hands cool and voice warm 'cos he loves me. It's so nice to be.
Crap. It's not a dream.
"C'mon luv, open your eyes. Let me see you're okay. Can't have the Slayer falling asleep on the job. Dangerous vampire here. Might need staking. Can't let Xander do it all. Not his calling. C'mon pet, let me see those beautiful eyes of yours."
I don't want to open my eyes. I don't want to be awake. I like being asleep. I have lovely, warm dreams where everything is safe and happy. Where I share my bed, my life with Dream Spike and no-one gets angry. And we're all happy, happy, happy all the time. When I'm awake. nothing fits so well. If I open my eyes he'll be there, watching me with his bright, all-seeing eyes. Bastard. And no way can I have a life with Real Spike. Cos he's bad. Bad, bad, bad. And Evil. And when did I become a six year old?
"Get away from her, bleach boy. She doesn't want you touching her."
"Xander, you are being very unhelpful and most unreasonable. Spike is not going to hurt her. And much as I would like to wreak my wrath on you I am not allowed. Unless you carry on threatening Spike. Then I can hurt you. A lot."
Yet another reason for playing dead. Don't have to watch the repeats of Xander and Anya's Laugh In. Aaarrrrgggghhhh! This is so unfair. Guess I'll just have to give in and get up. Try not to get into another stare out with Spike. Cos he is bad and evil. Got to remember that. He's an evil, undead, soulless. Oh my God! Spike's got a soul!
Xander's shouting at Spike. Anya's shouting at Xander. Spike's looking at me like I just kicked him in the balls. And I'm on the other side of the tree. Hiding. Yay Slayer speed. I haven't moved that fast since. well, earlier this evening when the whole mess started.
"What did you do to her? What the fuck did you do to Buffy? Oh man, you are so dead. Did you feel her up, is that it? Catch a grope while she was out of it? What did you do!?!? Owwwwwww!!!" Anya's grabbed Xander by the hair as he lunged at Spike. I don't think I ever realised how handy that girl could be in a chick fight. It's pretty damn effective 'cos Xander's stopped in his tracks and Anya hasn't had to budge an inch.
"I am enjoying this Xander, but I really should stop. If I let go will you behave?"
Xander starts to nod but I guess he thinks better of it. Finally using his brain.
"Yeh, yeh. I'm done. You can let go." Anya looks almost disappointed but her hand drops away. I can see she's ready to pounce again at the least move from Xander. Jeez, why couldn't she be this on the ball before she went back to being a demon? Xander's rubbing his head, looking from me to Spike.
"Are you okay, Buffy? What did Dead Boy Junior do? I hardly saw you move, you went so fast."
Spike's still looking at me with so much hurt on his face. And guilt. I see lots and lots of guilt. It almost makes me want to touch him, tell him it's okay. But, God, it's anything but okay.
"Sorry Slayer. Should've let the Whelp or Demon Bird check you out. Got a bit worried like when you dropped like a stone. Thought you'd had an 'eart attack or something. Didn't mean to scare you."
No, you didn't, did you Spike? Just looking out for me yet again. I'm not sure what to do anymore. What to say. And I can't stop looking at you. Looking for the changes. 'Cos they've gotta be there, right? It's gotta show on your face or in your eyes that you're different now. But all I can see is what was always there. Love. And it's no more use now than it was before. It can't be. So I'm still looking for answers. And there's one question running round my head.
"Should you be calling Anya 'Demon Bird'? I mean, if you've got a soul and all, shouldn't you be worried about hurting her feelings?"
And he's laughing. That's so not fair. It's a good question. He shouldn't laugh at me.
"Why would it hurt my feelings? I am a demon and I am a bird. Although not in the feathered sense. It is an accurate description, expressed with affection and acceptance. I think it's nice. Much nicer than Slayer. Which is also accurate." And Anya puts me in my place yet again. What is with that? And, Jeez Spike, will you stop laughing at me?
Spike - finally - lets the chuckle fest go. Might be 'cos I was glaring at him.
"Sorry lu.Slayer. No offence meant. I guess you've got a point. Just a bit surprised. After all, there must be loads of other questions you want to ask and. well, go ahead. Ask away. I'll give you a straight answer."
Oh yeh, there's a load of other questions. Hundreds. Maybe thousands. And they're all spinning round, making me dizzy. Okay, maybe I'm dizzy 'cos I've kinda been panting since my dash away from Spike. Alright! So I was already a little breathless when I woke up with Spike touching me. I admit it. Never denied it. Just doesn't mean anything. But Spike's still waiting on me, his face all open and honest. The look he used when we were alone. The one that would disappear when I opened my mouth to tell him I was leaving. I don't think I've ever seen it when the others are around. I hate the way it draws me back to a time I want to forget. It gives me the urge to throw a right hook at Spike's nose 'cos that way he'd either fight back, start yelling or at least look pissed. I can handle pissed off Spike. If he'd just been pissed the night he.. left, then I could've stopped it sooner. But then he was just desperate.
And I will not feel sorry for him. I will not forgive him. I won't, dammit.
"I've got a question for you, fangface. Did you think getting a soul would get you back into Buffy's pants?" I'm starting to worry about Xander's obsession with my underwear. Oh, who am I kidding? I've been worried about Xander and his obsessions all night. If not longer. And I can tell Anya isn't too impressed by the way her hand swings back to slap him upside the head. I'm almost sorry when it doesn't connect. I guess she's taking the rules seriously and only going for the physical hurt if Xander does.
The only one who's managing to ignore Xander is Spike. He's just watching me like he can't wait to hear what I'm gonna say next. Like I'm the centre of his universe. This totally sucks. Now I've gotta come up with something super smart and impressive. And I really don't think I've got it in me right now. But here goes.
"Will you lose it if you have a moment of true happiness?" Oh, for crying out loud! I'm getting as bad as Xander. I swear I meant to ask something else. Something not.. nakedness related. Seems to amuse Spike though.
"No, luv, it's not a curse. Well, not like that, anyhow. I can have as many.. moments of happiness as I want. I'd offer to let you test it out but I reckon you wouldn't be too keen."
Oh you don't know how keen... dammit, I said no Naked Spike thoughts! I wonder if anyone would notice if I went inside to take a shower. Nope, don't think I'd get away with that. Just have to settle with the good old 'not if you were the last guy on earth' glare. If he doesn't stop smirking I swear I really am gonna hit him. Oh great, now everyone's looking at me waiting for the next pearl of wisdom. Sorry, guys, this oyster's closed for the holidays. Someone else pick up the slack.
"As Buffy seems to be suffering from some form of mental deficiency, shall I continue the story now? I am getting very bored and I as I cannot relieve the tedium by hitting Xander or mocking his manhood, I would like to finish this and go home." Yeh, that's a great idea. Back to story hour. Oh wait, Xander wants to get his ten cents in. He'd better stop soon or he'll be out of beer money for the next month.
"What do you mean, you can't mock my manhood? You've been doing great so far. Why not keep going?" I get the feeling he's getting kinda pissed at Anya. I can live with that. Hey, it makes a change from me and Spike. Me or Spike. No and. Think he might regret pushing Anya's buttons though - no guilty conscience on her part.
"I would happily continue to mock you but the subject is so small it has left me with nothing more to say."
And score one for the demon.
Xander's back in defeated mode and it's kinda creepy how his hands are hovering over his crotch, like he wants to pet it and tell it everything's fine. Do guys really do that, reassure their.. Parts? Spike looks kinda sympathetic, which is so weird after all that's happened. Chalk it up to the universal brotherhood of male ego's. Thou shall not criticise the sacred trouser snake. Or whatever. Okay, you'd have real problems trying to criticise Spike in that department 'cos he is.. So not going there! C'mon Buffy, other things to think about. And they don't include just what Spike can do with.. Dammit!!
"And as I do not intend to discuss Xander's failings any longer, I will finish Spike's story and go home. As long as I can keep your attention for longer than five seconds, Buffy. I really can not understand how Spike can be so much in love with you when you are so rude." And how come I get to be Anya's personal punching bag? Hey, Xander's in love with her and she's totally rude. Obnoxious. Mouthy. Yada, yada, yada.
"Please continue, Anya. I can't wait to hear how Spike screwed up this time. And you're just the most perfect person to tell me. Carry on."
Spike's still looking strung out and my last comment hasn't helped. Gotta keep a hold on my tongue 'cos I was trying to insult Anya that time, not him. But I guess Spike bashing is kind of a habit. Maybe I should look at breaking it, 'cos I get the feeling it's a bad one. Hell, I know it is. (A)and he's so vulnerable now. I kinda wonder if he always was. But I wanna hear the story so the musings can wait.
"Well, Spike went to see Rocky, as I said."
"Why'd you do that Spike?" Okay, so now I've got questions. Sue me.
"I did wrong, Slayer. Did something I swore I'd never do. Couldn't figure out what to do about it. I didn't know this guy was a vengeance demon, just knew he solved demon problems. Sort of like a cross between the A- Team and Sigmund Freud from what I 'eard. Didn't know what else to do so I thought it was worth a go. You know what I'm like for thinking things through. Wasn't up to thinking then, anyhow. Just wanted it to stop."
"Wanted what to stop?"
"The guilt. The anger. The despair. You name it, I seemed to have a double helping. Didn't seem right. And I couldn't control it. Couldn't control me. Sorry, luv." I watch him talking and it's like each word is a weight 'cos his shoulders just keep sagging. He won't look me in the eyes. Except for a second when he says sorry. And I'm fighting the urge to hug him and tell him it's okay. Reminding myself that it's not okay. Even though I've kinda forgotten why that is.
"Do you have any more questions Buffy, or may I continue? After all, I would hate to interrupt your interruption." Okay, I've had it. My house, my rules. My problem.
Spike nearly jumps out of his skin as I grab his hand and start dragging him towards the house. There's a yelp from Xander as he tries to grab Spike's other hand and gets slapped by Anya. But they both start to follow. I wait till I get to the front door before I turn round.
"Good night. Sweet dreams. See ya. sometime." I wanna laugh at the looks on their faces. But the funnies are stopped cold by Spike trying to pull away.
"Umm, good night Slayer. Guess your tired. Tell you the rest tomorrow." Stupid vampire.
"Not you, Spike. You're coming inside with me and we are so gonna talk this thing out. Xander, don't bother. You've got nothing to say that I want to hear. And Anya, thanks for the help but.. You know what? I can take it from here."
So I push the door open, drag Spike into the hall, nudge him towards the front room and try not to sigh at his look of combined terror and hope. Try not to yell as he avoids touching anything. I think he'd float above the ground if he could. But I can hear the other two behind me, shuffling and hissing at each other as they make for the door. Ditch them then deal with Spike.
"Look, guys, I know you're both worried but tough. Just go. You're really not needed here. Sorry. But I need to talk to Spike. Alone."
And with that I shut the front door and turn to the real problem.
"Whoa! You are one twisted puppy." And Xander is back in the game. Just gotta hope he's only after a talking part. Don't think I can take anymore of Action Xan Man tonight. "You could'a taken a walk in the sun, fallen on a stake. Hey, you could'a come to me - I would've been happy to help. But no, that's too honest for you. You have to go to the Wacko World of Wish- granters. Man, that's warped, even for you. Oh. Oh! Are you gonna get gutted? Can I watch?"
I get a glimpse of the old Spike 'cos he's looking at Xander with total contempt. I don't know who to side with on this one 'cos, hey, going to a vengeance demon? Not of the good. But wanting to watch the vengeance doesn't sound like ideal mental health either. I'm siding with Xander on the 'what was the vengeance' question, though.
And I'm getting that tense feeling again 'cos Anya has just stepped in between Xander and Spike. Okay, so I didn't rush to fill the role of Spike defender but. There's no need. Spike's loose and can get away from Xander if he needs to. Even if he didn't before. And, anyway, Xander's not being all threateny. Not really. And. and.. I was distracted! I was thinking about the vengeance thingy. I'd have snapped out of it if anything happened. So I would've done the defending thing if it was needed. Which it wasn't. Anya's being over-protective. Which is fine.
"Don't look at me like that, Buffy. I do not like being glared at. Your precious Xander is quite safe, but I will not let him hurt Spike. And you are very lucky that Spike is not vindictive. Xander could very easily be displaying his genitalia to all your neighbours right now.." Spike's looking at me with that tilt to his head that in no way makes him cute and curious. And his eyes aren't at all warm or loving. And he doesn't know what I'm thinking. He'd just better not smile at me, that's all I'm saying.
"Don't mind Buffy, pet. She just doesn't want any more drama on her front lawn. Let's get the storytelling done with, shall we?"
"You are too forgiving Spike. But I expect that's an unfortunate side effect of having a soul."
Why is the ground spinning?
-*-*-*-
"Buffy? Buffy, luv? C'mon pet, wake up"
Ummm, Spike hands. Stroking my face and hair. Hands cool and voice warm 'cos he loves me. It's so nice to be.
Crap. It's not a dream.
"C'mon luv, open your eyes. Let me see you're okay. Can't have the Slayer falling asleep on the job. Dangerous vampire here. Might need staking. Can't let Xander do it all. Not his calling. C'mon pet, let me see those beautiful eyes of yours."
I don't want to open my eyes. I don't want to be awake. I like being asleep. I have lovely, warm dreams where everything is safe and happy. Where I share my bed, my life with Dream Spike and no-one gets angry. And we're all happy, happy, happy all the time. When I'm awake. nothing fits so well. If I open my eyes he'll be there, watching me with his bright, all-seeing eyes. Bastard. And no way can I have a life with Real Spike. Cos he's bad. Bad, bad, bad. And Evil. And when did I become a six year old?
"Get away from her, bleach boy. She doesn't want you touching her."
"Xander, you are being very unhelpful and most unreasonable. Spike is not going to hurt her. And much as I would like to wreak my wrath on you I am not allowed. Unless you carry on threatening Spike. Then I can hurt you. A lot."
Yet another reason for playing dead. Don't have to watch the repeats of Xander and Anya's Laugh In. Aaarrrrgggghhhh! This is so unfair. Guess I'll just have to give in and get up. Try not to get into another stare out with Spike. Cos he is bad and evil. Got to remember that. He's an evil, undead, soulless. Oh my God! Spike's got a soul!
Xander's shouting at Spike. Anya's shouting at Xander. Spike's looking at me like I just kicked him in the balls. And I'm on the other side of the tree. Hiding. Yay Slayer speed. I haven't moved that fast since. well, earlier this evening when the whole mess started.
"What did you do to her? What the fuck did you do to Buffy? Oh man, you are so dead. Did you feel her up, is that it? Catch a grope while she was out of it? What did you do!?!? Owwwwwww!!!" Anya's grabbed Xander by the hair as he lunged at Spike. I don't think I ever realised how handy that girl could be in a chick fight. It's pretty damn effective 'cos Xander's stopped in his tracks and Anya hasn't had to budge an inch.
"I am enjoying this Xander, but I really should stop. If I let go will you behave?"
Xander starts to nod but I guess he thinks better of it. Finally using his brain.
"Yeh, yeh. I'm done. You can let go." Anya looks almost disappointed but her hand drops away. I can see she's ready to pounce again at the least move from Xander. Jeez, why couldn't she be this on the ball before she went back to being a demon? Xander's rubbing his head, looking from me to Spike.
"Are you okay, Buffy? What did Dead Boy Junior do? I hardly saw you move, you went so fast."
Spike's still looking at me with so much hurt on his face. And guilt. I see lots and lots of guilt. It almost makes me want to touch him, tell him it's okay. But, God, it's anything but okay.
"Sorry Slayer. Should've let the Whelp or Demon Bird check you out. Got a bit worried like when you dropped like a stone. Thought you'd had an 'eart attack or something. Didn't mean to scare you."
No, you didn't, did you Spike? Just looking out for me yet again. I'm not sure what to do anymore. What to say. And I can't stop looking at you. Looking for the changes. 'Cos they've gotta be there, right? It's gotta show on your face or in your eyes that you're different now. But all I can see is what was always there. Love. And it's no more use now than it was before. It can't be. So I'm still looking for answers. And there's one question running round my head.
"Should you be calling Anya 'Demon Bird'? I mean, if you've got a soul and all, shouldn't you be worried about hurting her feelings?"
And he's laughing. That's so not fair. It's a good question. He shouldn't laugh at me.
"Why would it hurt my feelings? I am a demon and I am a bird. Although not in the feathered sense. It is an accurate description, expressed with affection and acceptance. I think it's nice. Much nicer than Slayer. Which is also accurate." And Anya puts me in my place yet again. What is with that? And, Jeez Spike, will you stop laughing at me?
Spike - finally - lets the chuckle fest go. Might be 'cos I was glaring at him.
"Sorry lu.Slayer. No offence meant. I guess you've got a point. Just a bit surprised. After all, there must be loads of other questions you want to ask and. well, go ahead. Ask away. I'll give you a straight answer."
Oh yeh, there's a load of other questions. Hundreds. Maybe thousands. And they're all spinning round, making me dizzy. Okay, maybe I'm dizzy 'cos I've kinda been panting since my dash away from Spike. Alright! So I was already a little breathless when I woke up with Spike touching me. I admit it. Never denied it. Just doesn't mean anything. But Spike's still waiting on me, his face all open and honest. The look he used when we were alone. The one that would disappear when I opened my mouth to tell him I was leaving. I don't think I've ever seen it when the others are around. I hate the way it draws me back to a time I want to forget. It gives me the urge to throw a right hook at Spike's nose 'cos that way he'd either fight back, start yelling or at least look pissed. I can handle pissed off Spike. If he'd just been pissed the night he.. left, then I could've stopped it sooner. But then he was just desperate.
And I will not feel sorry for him. I will not forgive him. I won't, dammit.
"I've got a question for you, fangface. Did you think getting a soul would get you back into Buffy's pants?" I'm starting to worry about Xander's obsession with my underwear. Oh, who am I kidding? I've been worried about Xander and his obsessions all night. If not longer. And I can tell Anya isn't too impressed by the way her hand swings back to slap him upside the head. I'm almost sorry when it doesn't connect. I guess she's taking the rules seriously and only going for the physical hurt if Xander does.
The only one who's managing to ignore Xander is Spike. He's just watching me like he can't wait to hear what I'm gonna say next. Like I'm the centre of his universe. This totally sucks. Now I've gotta come up with something super smart and impressive. And I really don't think I've got it in me right now. But here goes.
"Will you lose it if you have a moment of true happiness?" Oh, for crying out loud! I'm getting as bad as Xander. I swear I meant to ask something else. Something not.. nakedness related. Seems to amuse Spike though.
"No, luv, it's not a curse. Well, not like that, anyhow. I can have as many.. moments of happiness as I want. I'd offer to let you test it out but I reckon you wouldn't be too keen."
Oh you don't know how keen... dammit, I said no Naked Spike thoughts! I wonder if anyone would notice if I went inside to take a shower. Nope, don't think I'd get away with that. Just have to settle with the good old 'not if you were the last guy on earth' glare. If he doesn't stop smirking I swear I really am gonna hit him. Oh great, now everyone's looking at me waiting for the next pearl of wisdom. Sorry, guys, this oyster's closed for the holidays. Someone else pick up the slack.
"As Buffy seems to be suffering from some form of mental deficiency, shall I continue the story now? I am getting very bored and I as I cannot relieve the tedium by hitting Xander or mocking his manhood, I would like to finish this and go home." Yeh, that's a great idea. Back to story hour. Oh wait, Xander wants to get his ten cents in. He'd better stop soon or he'll be out of beer money for the next month.
"What do you mean, you can't mock my manhood? You've been doing great so far. Why not keep going?" I get the feeling he's getting kinda pissed at Anya. I can live with that. Hey, it makes a change from me and Spike. Me or Spike. No and. Think he might regret pushing Anya's buttons though - no guilty conscience on her part.
"I would happily continue to mock you but the subject is so small it has left me with nothing more to say."
And score one for the demon.
Xander's back in defeated mode and it's kinda creepy how his hands are hovering over his crotch, like he wants to pet it and tell it everything's fine. Do guys really do that, reassure their.. Parts? Spike looks kinda sympathetic, which is so weird after all that's happened. Chalk it up to the universal brotherhood of male ego's. Thou shall not criticise the sacred trouser snake. Or whatever. Okay, you'd have real problems trying to criticise Spike in that department 'cos he is.. So not going there! C'mon Buffy, other things to think about. And they don't include just what Spike can do with.. Dammit!!
"And as I do not intend to discuss Xander's failings any longer, I will finish Spike's story and go home. As long as I can keep your attention for longer than five seconds, Buffy. I really can not understand how Spike can be so much in love with you when you are so rude." And how come I get to be Anya's personal punching bag? Hey, Xander's in love with her and she's totally rude. Obnoxious. Mouthy. Yada, yada, yada.
"Please continue, Anya. I can't wait to hear how Spike screwed up this time. And you're just the most perfect person to tell me. Carry on."
Spike's still looking strung out and my last comment hasn't helped. Gotta keep a hold on my tongue 'cos I was trying to insult Anya that time, not him. But I guess Spike bashing is kind of a habit. Maybe I should look at breaking it, 'cos I get the feeling it's a bad one. Hell, I know it is. (A)and he's so vulnerable now. I kinda wonder if he always was. But I wanna hear the story so the musings can wait.
"Well, Spike went to see Rocky, as I said."
"Why'd you do that Spike?" Okay, so now I've got questions. Sue me.
"I did wrong, Slayer. Did something I swore I'd never do. Couldn't figure out what to do about it. I didn't know this guy was a vengeance demon, just knew he solved demon problems. Sort of like a cross between the A- Team and Sigmund Freud from what I 'eard. Didn't know what else to do so I thought it was worth a go. You know what I'm like for thinking things through. Wasn't up to thinking then, anyhow. Just wanted it to stop."
"Wanted what to stop?"
"The guilt. The anger. The despair. You name it, I seemed to have a double helping. Didn't seem right. And I couldn't control it. Couldn't control me. Sorry, luv." I watch him talking and it's like each word is a weight 'cos his shoulders just keep sagging. He won't look me in the eyes. Except for a second when he says sorry. And I'm fighting the urge to hug him and tell him it's okay. Reminding myself that it's not okay. Even though I've kinda forgotten why that is.
"Do you have any more questions Buffy, or may I continue? After all, I would hate to interrupt your interruption." Okay, I've had it. My house, my rules. My problem.
Spike nearly jumps out of his skin as I grab his hand and start dragging him towards the house. There's a yelp from Xander as he tries to grab Spike's other hand and gets slapped by Anya. But they both start to follow. I wait till I get to the front door before I turn round.
"Good night. Sweet dreams. See ya. sometime." I wanna laugh at the looks on their faces. But the funnies are stopped cold by Spike trying to pull away.
"Umm, good night Slayer. Guess your tired. Tell you the rest tomorrow." Stupid vampire.
"Not you, Spike. You're coming inside with me and we are so gonna talk this thing out. Xander, don't bother. You've got nothing to say that I want to hear. And Anya, thanks for the help but.. You know what? I can take it from here."
So I push the door open, drag Spike into the hall, nudge him towards the front room and try not to sigh at his look of combined terror and hope. Try not to yell as he avoids touching anything. I think he'd float above the ground if he could. But I can hear the other two behind me, shuffling and hissing at each other as they make for the door. Ditch them then deal with Spike.
"Look, guys, I know you're both worried but tough. Just go. You're really not needed here. Sorry. But I need to talk to Spike. Alone."
And with that I shut the front door and turn to the real problem.
