Chapter 40

Clarice felt time stand still, she had said the words that had been in her mind for so long. How many times had she not dreamt of saying it to him, how many times had she not fantasized about how a future would with him? And now there was no time, now there was only tears to be shed for those dreams that would never come true.

His, name brought her such redemption, his touch was heaven. But the only thing that was left was death, she would never be able to live without him in the world, she was dead inside.

Clarice found her voice. "Why are we destined to be apart when we feel destined to be together?" Hannibal drew her nearer there were mere millimeters between them. "We will be together if that is your choice Clarice. You have always had the choice to be with me. Now it seems that this will be your last chance Clarice. I would have offered you more, but faith it seems to intervene with my choices and yours"

She could feel his warmth and saw a glimpse of sadness in his eyes. She knew what he meant, she could choose to be with him and that would be the end, the lambs would be silenced, she would have accepted the love he had offered her once before.

She had said no before, and the way her life had been was everything she didn't want, she had the company of Jack D in the night and the mornings brought with it the hangovers, every day was just a reminder of what she wanted but couldn't get, until now.

Had she said yes to this assignment because it was a chance to save something that she didn't want anyway? Or was it because she could be with him, had she ordered them to shoot her as well because it would be way out of this life and the choice she would have make? The answer was screaming her in the face, it was because of him that she was there, it was to say that she loved him, that she had loved him since Baltimore, and when she came to him in Memphis it was because it was the first time when she had felt that love and acknowledged the feeling for what is was. And she had come because it was time to say goodbye.

Clarice knew she had to tell him, even though he might know what was in her heart, she needed to get it from her chest, the secret that she had carried for so long. But before she could say anything Hannibal closed the space between them and with his metallic voice spoke again.

"Would you indulge me a last time Clarice?" Clarice couldn't find the strength to use her voice and simply gave a nod while her lips formed a yes. He put his arm around her waist and with the other lifted her chin up. "That's my girl" Clarice held her breath as his lips covered her in a sensual kiss that conveyed all his love for her. Clarice where for a short moment stunned until she gave in, the kiss changed from sensual to hungry so many years of love at a distant and the crushing goodbye was too much for Clarice; the tears ran down her chin.

Hannibal kiss those precious tears. Clarice found her strength and her voice. "I love you Hannibal, I have since I first saw you, I came back to Memphis because I realized that I was in love with you. For ten years I struggled with the fact that I was first a woman then an agent, you gave me the push to see it, but then you where gone and it was too late, and even though we don't have much time, I needed to tell you this.

"I know" was the only reply she got from Hannibal, so she continued. "But it doesn't change who I am and what I am. I still have my incorruptibility and my morals, I know I don't need the FBI to know that I still have that, you where right when you told me I only needed a mirror.

Hannibal was intrigued by her tale; he hadn't expected her to tell him this, his little brave warrior, his Clarice.

"But the mirror I needed was not one made of glass, it was a person, I needed you." That sentence caught Hannibal with surprise.

The tears had stopped falling and Clarice kissed Hannibal.

"I'm sorry, I would never ask you to stop Hannibal, so this is the way it's going to end." Hannibal looked at her; he couldn't read anything in her eyes but sadness. "I'll tell you that you decided how this is going to end for me." Hannibal's surprised was so evident on his face, he had expected her to say that he decided how this was going to end for him, but instead she had seen through him, she knew how things would for him, he had told her before. And for the first ever he had no answers.

"What do you mean Clarice?" "I have given them orders to shoot if you try anything..." Clarice let the words sink in, there was nothing unusual in giving that order. "The order goes for me as well?"

Hannibal retrieved his hands, he looked at her in disbelief. He saw the truth in her eyes.