Disclaimer: Tolkien's, not mine. Written for love, not money.

Author's Note: I really didn't mean to write this. I was kept awake the other night by Elladan demanding that I write down how he really feels about his brother. I tried to resist, I really did, because I'm supposed to be writing something of an epic in which both the twins are happily involved with other people. But he's a persistent little beggar, and I'm a sucker for the pair of them (together or otherwise) so eventually I gave in and wrote it all down. It's almost a PWP, but since I can't write smut to save my life I left them at the bedroom door and told them they'd have to get on with it on their own (I don't think they minded...). I've now locked them in their own little AU where they can do what they like with each other without interfering with my work-in-progress.

No, you can't have the key. It's mine.

Warning: (in case you hadn't guessed already) This little ficlet is slash. Not only that, it's incest, or twincest, if you will. So if that sort of thing makes you squick, then I suggest you point your mouse at the Back button right now. Don't say I didn't warn you.





My Twin, My Brother, My Soul

'Ai, my brother, my twin, for so long have I loved you, desired you, hungered for you; from afar, even when you are so achingly near to me, for the bond that binds us close holds you always so far out of my reach. How I long to feel your arms about me, to caress your face, the very image of my own. It is eating me, this hunger, consuming me from within, until soon I fear that all that will be left of me will be the mask I wear so that you shall never see my true feelings for you. For how could I show you that most precious part of my soul, only for you to turn from me in disgust? You, my twin, my brother, who have held my heart as long as I have known that a heart is for giving. We give our hearts but once, our people, and we love for eternity. My heart is given to one who will never return the gesture with his own, for you do not, will not, even know that my heart is yours; that is my tragedy, but I will not let it be yours as well. You must find your own love, though it will half kill me to watch you. I love you too much to wish to cage you, and I pray Elbereth (if she chooses to answer the prayers of one as sinful as I) will grant me the strength to love you enough to let you go.'

Elladan stood silently just inside the door of the library, lost in thought, watching his brother write a report for their father and Glorfindel on the Orc den they had destroyed on their most recent foray into the wild. Elrohir's brow was furrowed in concentration, and he raised a hand absently to brush a lock of inky-black hair out of his face. Elladan longed to go to his brother, stroke back his hair and braid it out of the way for him. He would have done it, had they been younger, but somehow it didn't feel right any more, not now that Elladan was finding that he had to keep a tighter and tighter rein on himself when he was around his brother. Elrohir was so beautiful, he thought, and wondered for a moment if that could be counted as vanity, one more sin to add to the list...but no, it was not just the physical beauty that they shared, the flawless Elven perfection of Elrohir's face, the strength and muscle lining his body, a gift from the heritage of Men that flowed in the veins of both the twins. No, it was more than that. Elrohir's soul shone out from his eyes, the purity and innocence of his heart belying the fierce killer's face that was the last sight for so many Orcs. They should consider themselves lucky that death came to them in so fair a form, thought Elladan with a sigh.

The sound alerted Elrohir to his brother's presence, and he looked up from his report, smiling in greeting.

Elladan carefully schooled his expression to reveal none of his thoughts and moved into the room, hoping that it didn't look as though he had been standing there watching his brother for fully five minutes. Unfortunately, distracted as he had been, he was not quite quick enough, and Elrohir's quick eyes caught the awkwardness and hastily-veiled melancholy on his brother's face.

"Elladan? What's wrong?" He rose from his seat and came to stand in front of his brother, meeting Elladan's troubled gaze with one of affectionate concern. Elladan had to look away, lost for words for once, and in a flash of the intuition they had shared all their lives, Elrohir saw through the shields that Elladan had held for so long around his heart. A slow, incredulous smile crept across his face, and Elladan caught his breath as he saw his own love reflected back at him from those shining grey eyes.

"Ai, Elladan," breathed Elrohir, "how could you ever believe it wasn't right? We give our hearts but once, and we love for all eternity, and we give that love to whom we choose. I chose you when we were Elflings. I have only waited for you to allow yourself to see it." He touched his lips to Elladan's, a gentle kiss at first, deepening as Elladan let go of the last of his self-imposed restraint, his disbelief at hearing his own thoughts spoken to him, and slid his arms around his brother. They felt as though their souls touched as their tongues met; they were closer than ever before, and it felt right, it felt perfect. This was surely how they were meant to be.

They broke apart reluctantly, and with one accord they left the library and stole silently through the corridors to their chambers, no need of words between them, twins and brothers and closest of souls.