Author's note: this chapter was co-written with the lovely C Ball


Shockwave had slept through the whole night. Cat had managed to bandage his ribs after the doctor had left. His breathing was still shallow. Cat checked the bandage on his head; thankfully it wasn't bleeding anymore. Cat felt of his forehead; he was starting to run a little bit of a fever. The doctor had visited early in the day and had said to expect a little fever. Shockwave moaned quietly in his sleep. Cat couldn't quite make out what he was saying.

"Alyssa....." he moaned quietly.

"Shh...Jas." Cat replied soothingly as she placed a wet washcloth on his forehead.

"No..."

"Jas its ok ye are safe now."

"Bastard...killed her..."

Cat knew she this wasn't any of her business, but she couldn't stand to see Shockwave in such obvious mental pain. "Who killed her Jas?" Cat asked knowing Shockwave couldn't hear her.

"Kill him....I'll kill the bastard..."

Shockwave started moving around in the bed with every sentence. Cat was afraid he might hurt himself. "Jas relax....everyone is safe now."

"No...not until he dies..."

Shockwave started moving around more violently. "Jas...ye are going to hurt yourself....stop."

"NO!!!!!!!!!!!" He jerked upwards in bed, breathing heavily.

"Jason...ye ok now." Cat said startled by Shockwave's sudden movement. Cat placed both hands on Shockwave's shoulders; trying to keep him from getting out of bed.

He struggled against her. "Let me go!!!"

"Where would ye go Jas?" Cat asked as Shockwave's struggles got weaker. He was still pretty weak and the sudden out burst had taken a lot of his strength.

He went limp in her arms as his struggling ceased.

"Jas....are ye awake?"

"Where am I..."

"A safe house. Ye need to be lying down." Cat answered as she started gently pushing Shockwave back down toward the bed.

"What happened?"

"Ye got knocked in the head....and the restaurant blew up."
"Jaye? The others...."

"I'm not sure...all the survivors were taken to a local hospital."

"Any of them...survive?"

"I'm sure Jaye got out."

He closed his eyes and a pained expression crossed his face.

"Jas?"

"Yes?"

"Is ye head hurting...ye ribs....or is something else bothering ye?"

"Have I...said anything?"

"About what Jas?"

Cat asked as arraigned the bed covers back around Shockwave; trying to make him comfortable again.

"Anything."

"Ye should get some rest Jas...some one hit ye on the head pretty hard."

"Gill..."

"Rest Jas."

"What did I say?"

"Jas ye shouldn't be worry about that right now."

"Gill..." he managed a severe tone.

"Ye promise me that ye will get some rest if I tell ye want ye said?"

"Yes."

"Fine...ye said the name Alyssa and that someone had killed her. That's all. Now will you please get some rest Jas? Ye have a pretty bad concussion."

"Shit...." he closed his eyes and slammed his fist onto the mattress.

"Jas...don't do this to yourself....The doctor had said that ye might talk out of your head." Cat said quietly trying to gently push the hair back on Shockwave's forehead. Shockwave jerked his head away from her touch.

"Don't touch me..."

"Why Jas? What are ye afraid of?"

"Just don't...." he refused to meet her eyes.

"Don't what Jas? Don't look at ye? Don't care about ye?"
"Yes." he snarled.

Cat blurted out the last sentence before she could stop herself. "Ye don't want anyone to care about ye is that it?"

"Yes."

"Fine Jas.....if ye don't need anyone then I guess ye don't want me in here do ye?" Cat asked angrily standing up to leave.

His sharp eyes softened.

"I'll take that as a yes. If ye want anything you'll have to come downstairs to get it. I'm not bringing up a bloody thing up here."

As she slammed the door shut behind her, Shockwave hung his head. She didn't deserve that, it wasn't her fault. She hadn't gotten anyone killed...

From the hall, Cat swore she could hear crying.

Cat hesitated at the top of the stairs. She knew she really shouldn't have gotten angry at Shockwave. She also couldn't believe that she had fallen in love with so quickly. She started to turn back and talk to him, but she couldn't she was still a little upset with him.

Something slammed against a wall and shattered. Cat jumped at the sudden noise. It had come from the bedroom. Cat quickly went to the bedroom door and knocked. "Jas are ye okay?"

His eyes were red, his breathing heavy. Not receiving an answer from Shockwave. Cat opened the door concerned. "Jas why didn't ye answer me?"

"Do you want to die?"

Cat blinked in surprise at the question. The Shockwave that she had first met and flirted with had been replaced a dark and brooding person. This Shockwave was starting to scare her. Cat couldn't answer him; she was afraid if she gave the wrong answer he would start throwing objects. She could tell her silence was bothering him.

"ANSWER ME!" he roared.

"Jas..." Cat replied quietly taking a step back toward the door.

"Gillian, please. If you want to live, forget you ever knew me."

"I can't forget ye Jas. Ye mean too much to me."

"She said the same thing. And you know what it got her?"

"Who Jas...Alyssa?"

"Yes. You know what she got for loving me?"

"What happened to her Jas?"

"She got a .45 slug in the head. That's what her love cost her."
"So is this what ye are going to do to every woman that tries to get close to ye? Ye going to push them anyway? Ye are being a coward Jason Faria!" Cat replied angrily. Shockwave looked at her as if she had slapped him across the face.

"He killed her to get to me! Don't you understand?!"

"Aye..I understand perfectly Jas. Ye are afraid of the person that killed Alyssa...so afraid that ye will push everyone away till ye are by yourself. And in the end he has won and killed ye Jas; just the same as if he would've killed ye with a gun."

He hung his head.

Cat knew her words had hurt him deeply. But she had to make him understand that he couldn't build a shell around himself.

"Who killed Alyssa Jas?" Cat asked sitting down beside of Shockwave on the bed.

After a minute, he answered. "Two people."

Cat reached out and took Shockwave's hand in hers. He tried to pull his hand away but she wouldn't let go. "Who?"

"Headman."

"No wonder ye took out after him. He almost killed ye tonight Jas? Do ye think he recognized ye?"

"I'm not sure..."

"Jas....ye can't let him win. Ye can't shut yourself off from everyone." Cat said quietly moving her other hand up to gently push back Shockwave's hair from his forehead.

"It can't be him though.."

"Why's that Jas? What make ye think it isn't Headman?"

"Because I took him down six months ago. He's in Leavenworth..."

"Is there any way he could have gotten out?"

"No. No one was supposed to be admitted to see him."

"What about a lawyer or family members?"

"I don't know...I was barred form the case once he was convicted.

"Because of Alyssa?"

"His lawyer said I was a danger to his client."

"O." Cat quietly replied still gently stroking Shockwave's forehead. She didn't want to ask him who the other person he held responsible for Alyssa's death was. She knew he would say himself. But Shockwave said it for her.
"I was the other." he said, hanging his head. "We'd gotten Headman cornered in a warehouse. He managed to get behind me, put three rounds in my back and shoulder. She ran forward to help me..."

"Jas....if ye aren't ready to tell me I understand." Cat said catching onto Shockwave's hesitation.

"He was waiting..." Shockwave replied, feeling his throat thickening.

Cat didn't say anything, she wanted for Shockwave to continue. She reassuring squeezed his hand.

"He shot her in the head as she knelt to check my wounds."

"Jas...I'm sorry luv..."

He nodded, squeezing her hand. Cat slid her hand out of Shockwave's and held out her arms to him. He nodded.

Cat pulled Shockwave into a tight embrace. His head rested against her chest. She held him tight and stroked his hair, singing to him in Gaelic. She rocked him back and forth as she sung. As she held him, years of hate, loss, and fear drained from him. Cat could feel Shockwave's body shaking in her arms. She continued to rock and sing to him until he felt like breaking the embrace. His tears soaked her shirt as he shook in her embrace.

"Ssh Jas...." Cat said quietly as she held him. After a few minutes, he stopped shaking.

"Jas...luv..." Cat said still stoking his hair.

"Yes?"

"I still love ye....no matter what."

He looked up, his eyes red. A slight smile crossed his face.

"What Jas?"

"I owe you my life."

"The restaurant? Someone had to get ye home."

He took her hand in his. "Thank you."

"Ye welcome luv...anytime."

He leaned closer to her.

"Yes Jas?"

His lips brushed over hers. Cat didn't try to stop him; in fact she kissed him in return. He held her as they kissed, gently lying back on the bed. Cat laid beside of them as they kissed, still holding on tightly to Shockwave.

"Thank you..." he whispered.

"For what?"

"Everything."