Chapter 1

Cloud set his alarm clock for 7:00 AM for he had to get up and feed the Chocobo's. For all he knew, Marlene could have been out partying with a 35 year old man.

Tifa was in the bathroom across the hall. Cloud was preparing himself for another baby-making attempt from Tifa. The past 3 weeks every night, Tifa tried some way to make a baby with Cloud. She was fine with Marlene, Her child with Barret, But she wanted one with her childhood sweet heart, Cloud.

"Hmm..." Cloud thought, "Tifa should be coming anytime.... Now."

Right at that time Tifa walked in. She was wearing a silk night gound that was vary tight. She was holding her hair up in a ball, and let go of it, letting it fall over her shoulders. She walked over the the bed and jumped on and stayed on her hands and knees. She crawled right above Cloud.

"Ready, Hon?" Tifa asked in a seductive voice.

"Ready?" Cloud said, "Ready for what?"

"You know!" Tifa said excitedly. She lowered her head and planted a french kiss on Cloud's lips. Cloud responed by wrestling his tongue into her mouth as well. They let go. Tifa panted, catching her breath.

"Oooh, that was nice." Tifa said with her eyes closed and smiling.

"You liked it?" Cloud asked.

"Mh... Hm." Tifa moaned.

"That's all you get." Cloud said.

Tifa grew angry, "WHAT?" Tifa yelled.

"Shh, Marlene is trying to sleep!" Cloud said. "Oh, Shut up, she's probably off dancing with some 35-year-old guy! What's your problem!?"

"Problem?" Cloud said, "I'm not the one with the problem! You are to sexually excited... ALL THE TIME!" Cloud said. Tifa got down on her ass and squatted over to her side of the bed and sat on the edge.

"Well," She began, "Don't I excite you?"

"After a year of nothing but all sex, I wanna calm down a bit!"

"A Year?" Tifa exclaimed, "It was more like a month or two! I LOVED it! I want more! And I want a baby!"

"What about Marlene?" Cloud asked.

"I Love her!" Tifa said, "But... I want one with you!"

"Not tonight, maybe some other time!" Tifa threw a coat on and ran out of the house. She got in the family car and drove off.

Red 13 walked in.

"Where's she going?" Red asked.

"Dunno, I hope she comes back soon though, I payed for that car!"Cloud said.

Tifa drove for a half hour before stopping at an abandoned parking lot. Suddenly the car door clicked and in jumped someone. It was a ninja. An old freind, Yuffie.

"Hey, Tifa, I saw you driving around!" Yuffie said.

"Oh, hey Yuffie." Tifa said in a gloomy voice, resting her head on the car door.

"What's the matter?" Yuffie asked.

"Cloud won't fuck me. I want a baby!"

"Well I can't do anything about a baby, but..." Yuffie leaned over and planted a kiss on Tifa. Tifa broke away.

"Uh.." tifa began, "You're a..."

"Bi-Sexual, yes." Yuffie said. "And a 'Helper' "

"A SLUT?" Tifa exclaimed.

"I like to use the term helper, but yes." Yuffie admitted.

Yuffie leaned in again, but Tifa moved her head, banging it against the window.

"Ow." Tifa said, "Listen... I can't, I'm married... I... Oh. I don't know anymore!" Tifa looked sad.

"Oh, I'm sorry, Tifa, I didn't mean to..."

"It's not you." Tifa said, "I think, I... I need a helper right now."

Yuffie leaned in, "Mmm... Good...." She frenched Tifa and Tifa responded back. "MMMM" The two moaned at the same time, not stopping the kiss. Yuffie put her hand down and slipped it into Tifa's pants, she began to feel the wetness on Tifa's private spot warm up. Tifa put her hand behind her and layed the seat back. The kiss stopped for a second as Yuffie took off her shirt revealing her pink bra, she leaned down and laid on Tifa as the two began a night they would remember forever....

The next morning Cloud sat on the steps mad as Tifa rolled into the drive way. She got out with a smile on her face. She walked over to Cloud.

"Do you have any idea what time it is?" Cloud asked, "9:30! AM! I had to feed the Chocobo's at 7 ! That's my job!"

"Hey, I slept late I had a hard ni.... sleepless night last night." Tifa said.

Cloud went to the car and opened the door. He caught a whiff of a smell he hadn't smelt in a year.

"What the hell?" He sniffed. "It smells like friggin' cum in here! What'd you do?"

"Hey you wouldn't have sex with me So I...." Tifa said, but suddenly thought, "Shit! Think, Think!"

Tifa blurted out, "Masturbation is still hip these days right?"

Cloud got in the car and drove off. Tifa walked into the house, and into her room. she took a peice of paper out of the top of her gown. It said 'Yuffie: 749-888-9107' She put it in her jewlery box under her wedding ring. She walked into the kitchen and noticed Red 13 sitting at the table with a bib and a knife in one paw and a fork in the other.

"I'm hungry!" Red said.

"You know where it is." Tifa said, paying more attention to mail that rested on the kitchen counter. She kicked the cat bowl over to the leg of the chair Red was on.

Red got down, "Thanks a lot!'' Red said, "A Cat bowl? I'm more of a dog then a cat, geesh!" He took a bite out of the chunky food, "Salmon, geezus! Throw a cute little face on me and shuv a friggin' rat down my throat!"

Tifa had already left the room to go get dressed.

"I should have went with Barret and AVALANCHE, at least I coulda killed something! Now then, Where'd that damn squeaky-bone get off to?"

End of Chapter 1