Hello, as always, I don't own Hey Arnold! But it would be so cool if it was
real.
Wedding Day Blues
By: Who else? ME!
RING!!! 'If it is Helga, again, I will scream.' "Hello."
"Hi Erica, it's Helga."
"HELGA!!! WHY THE HELL DO YOU KEEP CALLING ME?!? IT'S 12 O'CLOCK IN THE MORNING, THE DAY BEFORE MY WEDDING, AND YOU CAN'T STOP CALLING! I NEED TO WAKE UP TOMORROW! Look, I am very sorry that Lila broke a promise, really, but it is not going to change. Leave me alone, now." 'I am a bride, not the energizer bunny.'
"Okay, Happy wedding day." Click!
The next day.
"Hey Helga, I'm sorry I yelled at you last night." I looked at myself in the mirror; my wedding dress is so beautiful. Shoot, where is my veil? It's in the pastor's office. "Helga, could you get my veil? It's in the pastor's office."
* * *
Erica looks really pretty in her dress. Where is the pastor's office? Oh, here it is. Open up! I love surprises. "What?!" SLAM! That did not happen. I must keep Bride away from office. "Oh, hi Erica, how bad do you need that veil, because honestly, it wasn't in there."
"Helga, move, I need the veil." She looks serious about this one.
"Oh, hi Arnold, what a surprise." Damn, why doesn't everybody I know come to the door? "How is your girlfriend?" Stay away from the door.
"Um, Helga, I need to get the bible for the Priest." Don't look at me with that look. I didn't do anything. He reached for that doorknob before I could stop him.
"Hi, Arnold, right?" Frank was sitting at the desk, unlike how I saw him earlier. What happened?
"Yeah, Frank I just need to get the bible." I could have sworn that he was with. Arnold closed the door. "I don't know what your problem is Helga, but don't let it interfere with the-"
"AHHH! WHAT THE WORLD ARE YOU DOING WITH HER?!?" Erica was screaming at the top of her lungs. "And who are you? *gasp*" Arnold had already started running down the hall.
"Erica, what's wrong- LILA!!! BUT I THOUGHT! I thought." I could tell that Arnold's heart was breaking at the site of Lila and Frank. "Why did you do it?"
"You told me you were a slut! I got your business card." Every body's eyes went wide.
"I think I need to lie down." Like I haven't heard that one before.
"Helga, Arnold, you stall the wedding. Lila, Frank, you guys get ready to tell the congregation why we are not going to have a wedding." Now slightly on the edge of tears "John, you comfort me because I think I am going to cry." She started to cry on his shoulder. "That dirty little..."
"John, who are you? I mean, you look like a best man." I wanted to know who this is.
"I'm the best man, his cousin." He pointed to Frank, who was trying to zip up his pants. "Not a very bright man, or decent." He moved over to the couch, picking up the tearful Erica. "You better tell try to stall the wedding."
"Yeah, see you later. Come on, Arnoldo!" I finally made it to the sanctuary. "Oh, hi Phoebe, could you help us with something?"
Wedding Day Blues
By: Who else? ME!
RING!!! 'If it is Helga, again, I will scream.' "Hello."
"Hi Erica, it's Helga."
"HELGA!!! WHY THE HELL DO YOU KEEP CALLING ME?!? IT'S 12 O'CLOCK IN THE MORNING, THE DAY BEFORE MY WEDDING, AND YOU CAN'T STOP CALLING! I NEED TO WAKE UP TOMORROW! Look, I am very sorry that Lila broke a promise, really, but it is not going to change. Leave me alone, now." 'I am a bride, not the energizer bunny.'
"Okay, Happy wedding day." Click!
The next day.
"Hey Helga, I'm sorry I yelled at you last night." I looked at myself in the mirror; my wedding dress is so beautiful. Shoot, where is my veil? It's in the pastor's office. "Helga, could you get my veil? It's in the pastor's office."
* * *
Erica looks really pretty in her dress. Where is the pastor's office? Oh, here it is. Open up! I love surprises. "What?!" SLAM! That did not happen. I must keep Bride away from office. "Oh, hi Erica, how bad do you need that veil, because honestly, it wasn't in there."
"Helga, move, I need the veil." She looks serious about this one.
"Oh, hi Arnold, what a surprise." Damn, why doesn't everybody I know come to the door? "How is your girlfriend?" Stay away from the door.
"Um, Helga, I need to get the bible for the Priest." Don't look at me with that look. I didn't do anything. He reached for that doorknob before I could stop him.
"Hi, Arnold, right?" Frank was sitting at the desk, unlike how I saw him earlier. What happened?
"Yeah, Frank I just need to get the bible." I could have sworn that he was with. Arnold closed the door. "I don't know what your problem is Helga, but don't let it interfere with the-"
"AHHH! WHAT THE WORLD ARE YOU DOING WITH HER?!?" Erica was screaming at the top of her lungs. "And who are you? *gasp*" Arnold had already started running down the hall.
"Erica, what's wrong- LILA!!! BUT I THOUGHT! I thought." I could tell that Arnold's heart was breaking at the site of Lila and Frank. "Why did you do it?"
"You told me you were a slut! I got your business card." Every body's eyes went wide.
"I think I need to lie down." Like I haven't heard that one before.
"Helga, Arnold, you stall the wedding. Lila, Frank, you guys get ready to tell the congregation why we are not going to have a wedding." Now slightly on the edge of tears "John, you comfort me because I think I am going to cry." She started to cry on his shoulder. "That dirty little..."
"John, who are you? I mean, you look like a best man." I wanted to know who this is.
"I'm the best man, his cousin." He pointed to Frank, who was trying to zip up his pants. "Not a very bright man, or decent." He moved over to the couch, picking up the tearful Erica. "You better tell try to stall the wedding."
"Yeah, see you later. Come on, Arnoldo!" I finally made it to the sanctuary. "Oh, hi Phoebe, could you help us with something?"
