Matt Camden inserted his key in the door of his and Sarah's apartment and
heard the sound of Anna Grace crying inside. He inwardly groaned but
immediately felt guilty. The days following Jack and Dana's deaths had
been hard on all three of them. Anna Grace, accustomed to her mother's
breast milk, did not take readily to the switch to formula. It had taken
the better part of the day Saturday to get her to drink a full bottle. It
was Sunday before Matt and Sarah had talked the super into letting them
into Jack and Dana's apartment. Seeing all the equipment in the nursery,
Sarah had sat down heavily in the rocking chair.
"Matt, I had no idea a baby required all this stuff." She had looked at a piece of machinery next to the crib that could only be a breathing and heart monitor. "I knew Dana was worried about Anna Grace being a preemie but I had no idea they used an apnea monitor with her. What if something had happened to her the last couple of nights?"
Matt had knelt beside her and caressed her cheek. "Nothing happened. She's completely okay. She's even getting to like the formula. The worst is past us and after the funeral tomorrow, we can start figuring out what we need to do next."
Now, two days later, he wondered if he'd been too optimistic. Anna Grace had cried almost nonstop since they had left the apartment two days ago. It was almost as if she knew she'd lost the two most familiar adults in her life and wasn't sure if life would really be okay. He knew Sarah was exhausted. He at least had class today to get out of the apartment for a little while. Tomorrow would be his day to stay home with the baby so Sarah could attend her classes. He wasn't sure what they would do yet Thursday when they were both had classes at the same time.
"Matt, can you see to Anna Grace while I fix her bottle?" If Sarah's greeting lacked it's normal warmth and affection, her frazzled expression explained why as she placed the baby in his arms. Belatedly she brushed her lips against his cheek before heading into the kitchen. He followed behind her. She filled the bottle with premixed formula and set it in a pan of water, Sarah. "How was your day?"
"Dr. Gregory had me stay after class." Matt shook his head as he jiggled the crying baby in his arms. Sarah looked up from where she was heating the bottle. Something in her husband's toned worried her.
"I thought you were sure you aced that exam last week."
Shifting Anna Grace to his other shoulder, Matt sat on one of the bar stools. Unconsciously he patted her back, hoping to soothe her until her meal was ready. "Apparently he and his wife have been trying to have a baby for years now without any luck. He heard about Jack and Dana and wondered if they could adopt Anna Grace."
Sarah tested the bottle on her wrist before handing it to Matt. "What did you tell him?"
The crying stopped as soon as Matt stuck the nipple in Anna Grace's mouth. He looked at Sarah like he couldn't believe her question. "I told him she's not up for adoption. What else would I tell him?"
"That you'd talk to your wife about it? Matt, maybe we should consider his offer."
Imperceptivity, his hold on the baby tightened. "How could you suggest that? Jack and Dana put their trust in us. We're Anna Grace's godparents. It's our responsibility to raise her now that they are gone."
Sarah turned her back on Matt. "Jack and Dana never expected to die in a car accident so soon after she was born. "Matt, we are both still in medical school. How can both of us go to school, work and raise a baby?"
"We'll figure out a way." Matt rose and went to his wife. Tenderly he kissed her cheek, upset to see she was crying. "I know the last few days have been rough but do you really want to give her away?"
"Of course I don't, Matt. But I don't want to give up my dreams either. We both know that if we keep her and things get difficult, I'll be the one who'll have to give up school."
The bottle finished, Matt moved Anna Grace back to his shoulder to burp her. He couldn't explain why the impossibly small bundle of his goddaughter had become so important to him in the short amount of time since his best friend's death. But he could also understand Sarah's hesitation.
"Okay, so going to medical school and raising a baby at the same time might be difficult. We've done okay so far haven't we?"
Sarah couldn't look at him. "So far but so far hasn't been typical. Neither of us had class over the weekend and classes were cancelled yesterday because of the funeral. If we were still in Glen Oak, I wouldn't be worried at all cause our families would be nearby and could help. Who do we have here? The closest are the Colonel and Grandma Ruth but they are an hour away in Buffalo. I don't want to put her in a daycare; but what choice would we have?"
Matt sighed. "We would figure out a way around it if you became pregnant, wouldn't we? Can't we do the same with Anna Grace?"
Before Sarah could reply, the doorbell rang. With a sigh, she went to answer the door. The elderly lady who lived in the apartment next to them was standing there holding a casserole dish. She smiled at Sarah.
"Hello dear, I hope this isn't a bad time."
Surprised, the younger woman moved to allow her to enter. "Not at all, Mrs. Toliver. Can we help you?"
"I heard a baby crying the last few nights."
"We're sorry, Mrs. Toliver." Matt supplied. "We didn't realize she was disturbing the neighbors."
"Nonsense, what else are babies supposed to do to get people's attention. I'm just embarrassed to admit I didn't even realize the two of you were expecting. I pride myself on knowing everything that happens in the building. I see you coming and going all the time but you never looked pregnant. But look at that angel. She's a nice size newborn for as little as you stayed."
Matt would have laughed under any other circumstances. Every time he was around Mrs. Toliver, he couldn't help be reminded of Mrs. Hinkle from home. "Anna Grace isn't our baby." He looked at Sarah. "She could soon legally be though. Her parents were killed in an accident Friday night. Sarah and I are Anna Grace's godparents so we are now her guardians."
"Poor sweet dear. No wonder she has sounded so unhappy. But look at the two of you; you both looked about done in. Believe me, I remember what it's like to get used to having an infant in the house. I was about your age when I had my Robert. I don't think I slept for than an hour a night until he was a year old. It got better after that; that is until he became a teenager and I was scared to sleep at all." She smiled. "Can I hold her? I haven't held a baby since my youngest grandchild was here last Christmas."
Stealing a glance at Sarah, Matt transferred the now sleeping baby to the older woman's arms. "Mrs. Toliver, you don't work do you?"
For a moment, she didn't answer; instead her sole attention was on the baby. Finally she looked up. "No. I haven't worked in about twenty years. I spend most of my days and evenings all alone in my apartment. About the only entertainment I get these days is from watching my neighbors come and go." The look she gave Matt was such a cross between Mrs. Hinkle and Mrs. Bink that Matt couldn't help but laugh. He knew what he was thinking was right but he wasn't about to make the same mistake of not talking to his wife first. But Mrs. Toliver wasn't going to give him a chance. "I know the two of you are busy medical students. So when are you going to ask me keep this precious angel?"
"Matt, I had no idea a baby required all this stuff." She had looked at a piece of machinery next to the crib that could only be a breathing and heart monitor. "I knew Dana was worried about Anna Grace being a preemie but I had no idea they used an apnea monitor with her. What if something had happened to her the last couple of nights?"
Matt had knelt beside her and caressed her cheek. "Nothing happened. She's completely okay. She's even getting to like the formula. The worst is past us and after the funeral tomorrow, we can start figuring out what we need to do next."
Now, two days later, he wondered if he'd been too optimistic. Anna Grace had cried almost nonstop since they had left the apartment two days ago. It was almost as if she knew she'd lost the two most familiar adults in her life and wasn't sure if life would really be okay. He knew Sarah was exhausted. He at least had class today to get out of the apartment for a little while. Tomorrow would be his day to stay home with the baby so Sarah could attend her classes. He wasn't sure what they would do yet Thursday when they were both had classes at the same time.
"Matt, can you see to Anna Grace while I fix her bottle?" If Sarah's greeting lacked it's normal warmth and affection, her frazzled expression explained why as she placed the baby in his arms. Belatedly she brushed her lips against his cheek before heading into the kitchen. He followed behind her. She filled the bottle with premixed formula and set it in a pan of water, Sarah. "How was your day?"
"Dr. Gregory had me stay after class." Matt shook his head as he jiggled the crying baby in his arms. Sarah looked up from where she was heating the bottle. Something in her husband's toned worried her.
"I thought you were sure you aced that exam last week."
Shifting Anna Grace to his other shoulder, Matt sat on one of the bar stools. Unconsciously he patted her back, hoping to soothe her until her meal was ready. "Apparently he and his wife have been trying to have a baby for years now without any luck. He heard about Jack and Dana and wondered if they could adopt Anna Grace."
Sarah tested the bottle on her wrist before handing it to Matt. "What did you tell him?"
The crying stopped as soon as Matt stuck the nipple in Anna Grace's mouth. He looked at Sarah like he couldn't believe her question. "I told him she's not up for adoption. What else would I tell him?"
"That you'd talk to your wife about it? Matt, maybe we should consider his offer."
Imperceptivity, his hold on the baby tightened. "How could you suggest that? Jack and Dana put their trust in us. We're Anna Grace's godparents. It's our responsibility to raise her now that they are gone."
Sarah turned her back on Matt. "Jack and Dana never expected to die in a car accident so soon after she was born. "Matt, we are both still in medical school. How can both of us go to school, work and raise a baby?"
"We'll figure out a way." Matt rose and went to his wife. Tenderly he kissed her cheek, upset to see she was crying. "I know the last few days have been rough but do you really want to give her away?"
"Of course I don't, Matt. But I don't want to give up my dreams either. We both know that if we keep her and things get difficult, I'll be the one who'll have to give up school."
The bottle finished, Matt moved Anna Grace back to his shoulder to burp her. He couldn't explain why the impossibly small bundle of his goddaughter had become so important to him in the short amount of time since his best friend's death. But he could also understand Sarah's hesitation.
"Okay, so going to medical school and raising a baby at the same time might be difficult. We've done okay so far haven't we?"
Sarah couldn't look at him. "So far but so far hasn't been typical. Neither of us had class over the weekend and classes were cancelled yesterday because of the funeral. If we were still in Glen Oak, I wouldn't be worried at all cause our families would be nearby and could help. Who do we have here? The closest are the Colonel and Grandma Ruth but they are an hour away in Buffalo. I don't want to put her in a daycare; but what choice would we have?"
Matt sighed. "We would figure out a way around it if you became pregnant, wouldn't we? Can't we do the same with Anna Grace?"
Before Sarah could reply, the doorbell rang. With a sigh, she went to answer the door. The elderly lady who lived in the apartment next to them was standing there holding a casserole dish. She smiled at Sarah.
"Hello dear, I hope this isn't a bad time."
Surprised, the younger woman moved to allow her to enter. "Not at all, Mrs. Toliver. Can we help you?"
"I heard a baby crying the last few nights."
"We're sorry, Mrs. Toliver." Matt supplied. "We didn't realize she was disturbing the neighbors."
"Nonsense, what else are babies supposed to do to get people's attention. I'm just embarrassed to admit I didn't even realize the two of you were expecting. I pride myself on knowing everything that happens in the building. I see you coming and going all the time but you never looked pregnant. But look at that angel. She's a nice size newborn for as little as you stayed."
Matt would have laughed under any other circumstances. Every time he was around Mrs. Toliver, he couldn't help be reminded of Mrs. Hinkle from home. "Anna Grace isn't our baby." He looked at Sarah. "She could soon legally be though. Her parents were killed in an accident Friday night. Sarah and I are Anna Grace's godparents so we are now her guardians."
"Poor sweet dear. No wonder she has sounded so unhappy. But look at the two of you; you both looked about done in. Believe me, I remember what it's like to get used to having an infant in the house. I was about your age when I had my Robert. I don't think I slept for than an hour a night until he was a year old. It got better after that; that is until he became a teenager and I was scared to sleep at all." She smiled. "Can I hold her? I haven't held a baby since my youngest grandchild was here last Christmas."
Stealing a glance at Sarah, Matt transferred the now sleeping baby to the older woman's arms. "Mrs. Toliver, you don't work do you?"
For a moment, she didn't answer; instead her sole attention was on the baby. Finally she looked up. "No. I haven't worked in about twenty years. I spend most of my days and evenings all alone in my apartment. About the only entertainment I get these days is from watching my neighbors come and go." The look she gave Matt was such a cross between Mrs. Hinkle and Mrs. Bink that Matt couldn't help but laugh. He knew what he was thinking was right but he wasn't about to make the same mistake of not talking to his wife first. But Mrs. Toliver wasn't going to give him a chance. "I know the two of you are busy medical students. So when are you going to ask me keep this precious angel?"
