Damaging Secrets

~Can love and friendship survive in the mist of a tangled web of secrets? Now that the Alliance has been destroyed, can Syd endure the repercussions that the secrets of other have caused?

Disclaimer: We do not own these characters.the writers and creators of Alias (as well as ABC) do. We're just having fun changing the plot a little.so read and enjoy.

PLEASE don't forget to review the story; otherwise we won't have incentive to keep posting more chapters!

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Chapter 3 Love and Lies

The sun shown bright outside Vaughn's window, shining right into Syd's eyes. As she was waking up she rolled over and began to remember the events of the past day. 'Wow, everything in my life is finally going right for once. Ever since Danny's death I have been looking forward to the day that SD-6 went down. And in the midst of all that, I finally let my guard down for Vaughn. I have been cautious to get too close, probably because of what happened to Danny. But I'm glad I finally...'

Her thoughts were interrupted by Vaughn mumbling, "ooouummm hurriiee.get him, the cow get away." Syd looked over at him and laughed to herself, "the cow?" she whispered. God, she loved him. Then it suddenly dawned on her, 'I know he says he loves me, but how? After what my mother did to his father, how can he possibly love me?' She sat and stared at his sleeping face questioning.

As a tear trickled down her face onto the pillow her mind couldn't stop thinking, 'Why?' Syd asked herself, 'Why did my mother have to be the person she was?'

'One question I want to ask her, no I need to ask her, is how she kept all those secrets from my father, and from me, for all those years. I don't think she understood what those secrets have done to my life.'

'I've never really confronted my mother about her past.I think I at least owe it to myself to ask her a few questions. I need to know the truth about her past, and my past. The mother I knew did die in that 'car crash,' now I want to get to know my 'real' mother. It's funny, for all the times she lied to me I still feel really close to her. She has gained most of my trust back. It's with her knowledge that I have survived my last few missions.'

'In my heart I really want to believe that she is trying to make up for all she down wrong by helping the CIA. I've tried talking to my father about it, but I guess it would take a hell of a lot for him to trust her again. Even though I can't get past all the lies I've been told by my mother as well as my father, I still feel like she's the only one that can relate to me.'

'I am a double agent, just like my mother, not for the same reasons, but still a double agent. Lately, I feel like my whole life is a tangled web of lies, from my past, into my present! I was told the lies when I was younger, maybe they were to protect me, but still I was never told the truth. And now I look my friends in the eye and lie to them!'

'I guess I'm worried about ending up like my mother because now I'm the one with the secrets. I don't want to end up living a life of lies, or at least a life of my lies. My whole life I've been living everyone else's lies, and I can't stand being lied to. But now I'm the one that turns around and lies to my best friends' faces!!! It kills me to do this, especially from Francie. When she asks me a simple question like 'how was your day at work' or 'how was your trip,' I have to look her in the eye and lie!!!'

'Every time I looked at her I felt horrible for lying to her. But how could I have told her the truth, after what happened to Danny.I killed him. Well, Sloane actually killed him, I think. Actually, come to think of it, who did killed Danny?'

'I feel like anyone I let myself get close to ends up dying because of me.' Syd looks over at Vaughn and thinks, 'I can't let this happen to him, I love him too much.'

'I feel weird talking to Vaughn about this; about Danny. My mother's the only one I can talk to about this, she's the only one that might understand. She's never been there for me before.but this could be her chance to be the mother she never was.'

Her thoughts were again interrupted by her cell phone ringing.