Disclaimer: Does this look like chapter 1? :looks around for disclaimer: I didn't think so.
A/N: Well boys and girls, we are getting close to the end! Once more, a round of applause for my beta Arlene, who has kept me on the grammatically correct path this whole way. Ok, now go read the chapter!! Go on, shoo!! :Makes shooing motions with hands:
There was a strange pulling sensation, and then Helena found herself in the same black-and-white world she remembered from her fight with Ketterly. There were evident differences, however, between that world, drawn from her own mind, and this one. Instead of being in a deserted street, she and Dinah were standing in the ruined lobby of an apartment building. Smoke was heavy in the air, and fires burned just out of sight, the sounds of burning material providing a muted background noise. "What is this place?" Dinah asked, confused.
Helena made her way to the front door; one glance outside told her everything. "This is where Lady Shiva lived, eight years ago," she said softly. Even knowing the truth, it was hard for her to reconcile the images of Barbara's long-ago mortal enemy and her old friend Sandy. "Shouldn't Barbara be here, Dinah? You came right to me, before."
"I don't know," Dinah admitted, looking around. "I don't exactly do this often. But if you're right, and Barbara's trying to punish herself, she may not want us to find her."
"Well, that's just tough," Helena muttered, heading for the stairs. "If I have to come into this rat hole, I'm not leaving without her." She took the steps two at a time, and Dinah followed more slowly.
There were four apartments on the second floor, and they split up to search them. Helena was just finishing her second apartment when she heard Dinah call to her. She went back out into the hallway to find the younger girl standing outside the last door. "It's locked," Dinah reported. "I've tried to get in, but it's almost like the door's sealed or something."
Helena frowned; none of the other doors had been locked. She tried the doorknob, pushed on the door, and finally threw all her weight against it, using all of her meta-enhanced strength, but nothing seemed to impact on the unyielding barrier. "She's gotta be in here," she said finally. "I'm not going to be able to break this down. Can you use your mind-meld, or whatever, and get her to let us in?"
Dinah stepped up to the door and placed her hands on it. Closing her eyes, she was still for several minutes. "She won't hear me," she said finally, stepping back. "I think it has to be you."
"But I've already tried," Helena protested. "It's too strong; I can't break through it."
"I don't think you're supposed to force your way in," Dinah suggested. "Try using your heart, Helena. You're closer to her than anyone; if there's anyone she'll let in, it's you. You just have to believe."
Helena eyed her doubtfully for a long moment. Finally, she stepped up to the door and laid both her hands on it. She pulled up all her memories of Barbara, filling her mind with all the love she felt for the woman who had become a second mother to her. "Barbara," she said softly. "Let me in. Please."
There was a long pause, and then the door swung open with a soft click. Helena stepped inside, letting instinct guide her to one corner of the room. She found Barbara sitting on the floor, legs tucked under her, dressed in her Batgirl costume. "Barbara, are you all right?" Helena asked quickly, kneeling in front of her. "What's going on?"
The older woman didn't answer her. She was staring at something across the room, tears streaming down her face. When Helena followed her gaze, she saw another figure slumped against a wall. "Shiva's sister," she said softly.
"It's my fault." Barbara's voice was barely above a whisper, but it drew Helena's attention back to her. "My arrogance, my recklessness. If I hadn't been so blind, Shiva never would have lost her sister."
"Barbara, come on; we have to get out of here," Helena insisted. "This building is on fire. Come on, I know you can walk in here, you did it before."
"No, I can't," Barbara said softly. "I don't deserve to. Why should I walk, even here? Why should I even dream about walking out there, when an innocent girl is dead because of me?" She reached up and pulled off her mask, staring into the empty eyeholes with equally empty eyes. "I should have just let everything die with Batgirl," she whispered, new tears filling her eyes. "What good do I do, from my damned computerized tower? Who do I really save?"
"You saved me," Helena said firmly. Reaching out, she pulled the Batgirl mask from Barbara and put it aside, then grasped the other woman's hands in her own. "Don't you know what you've done for me?" she asked, feeling tears of her own form in her eyes. "Don't you realize the difference you've made in my life? You have saved me so many times. You took me in after my mom died, when I had nowhere to go. You kept me from self-destructing in my own anger and pain; you showed me how to turn it into something positive, how to build a new life from the ashes of my old one."
Barbara tried to pull her hands away, shaking her head, but Helena didn't let go, continuing on ruthlessly. "And you know what? You did all that, not as Batgirl, but just as Barbara Gordon, a woman who I watched completely redefine herself after a horrible tragedy. You had every reason in the world to turn your back on this city and its people, but you didn't. You found a new way to make a difference, as Oracle. I know you feel responsible for that girl's death, but you aren't. The only person responsible for her while she was alive was her sister. Shiva made choices that put her in the line of fire, and she is the only one responsible for her death."
There was movement behind Helena, and then suddenly Dinah was there, settling to the floor beside her. "You saved me too, you know," she said quietly. "I came to New Gotham with nothing, and you gave me a home. But more than that, you gave me a family. After my mother died, you were there for me, just like you were for Helena. And during that whole deal with Hawke and the hit man, when I didn't even trust myself, you never gave up on me. You made me see that I didn't really want Hawke dead. I realized that you would always trust me and support me, no matter what." Reaching out, she lifted Barbara's chin, forcing the other woman to look at her. "We love you, Barbara," she said softly. "Please let us help you."
Dinah lowered her hand as Barbara took a deep breath, closing her eyes. When she opened them again, they could see that the emptiness was gone, replaced with the life and warmth that had been there before. "Come on," Helena said with a smile. "Let's go home."
She and Dinah stood, and after a moment Barbara joined them, somewhat unsteadily. "I don't think I know the way," Barbara said, glancing around as if seeing her surroundings for the first time.
"That's all right," Dinah said with a smile. "You showed us the way once. Now it's our turn." She grasped Barbara's hand in one of hers and reached out for Helena, who copied her movements.
And there you have it – proof that I am not immune to puppy dog eyes, which one reviewer was unscrupulous enough to use on me! LOL, just kidding, I love you guys! Ok, now review! Say nice things, and I might share my Smores!!
:lareina walks away, planning smores party for nice reviewers:
