Same warnings and disclaimers apply

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Part 3-Conclusion

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"That's as dishonest as lying, and I won't let you do it!"

"But Miaka, you must understand! We have no force big enough to combat Kutou! We need his help!" Hotohori stated firmly. "In this time of war, we need all the help we can get..."

"But...Not telling him about Tasuki! Kouji will be crushed when he finds out! What if he changes sides?" Miaka wrapped her slim arms about herself.

"We have to take that chance! Don't you see? Without his men, we don't even stand a fighting chance!" His expression softened. "It's a horrible thing to do, I know. We just have to hope his love for his country outweighs his love for his friend."

Even though her eyes were squeezed shut, Miaka was still crying. "Send the messenger then!" She turned away. "Why did it have to come to this? War was something I studied in school, read in books! How could things have escalated this quickly?" Hotohori longed to comfort her, but now was not the time.

"Please be strong for just a little longer, Miaka. One way or another, this will be ending soon."

With a nod to his advisor, a messenger was brought to receive and send a message, a message calling all of Konan to prepare for war...it wouldn't be safe on the street for women and children anymore.

Another messenger was sent tens of miles away, to Mount Reikaku, requesting Kouji's help. He arrived, dirty and haggard, three days later.

Kouji glared in concentration as he stumbled through the message. He hadn't had to read for a long, long time, and his skills had never been that good, anyway. He silently mouthed the words as he read. The man had found him in the room that never really felt like his, where he basically exercised his authority. The only chair in the room was occupied by himself, leaving the tired man to stand painfully.

"The emperor wishes me to fight for him." Kouji stated. The messenger nodded, once. Kouji finally looked the man over. He was covered in mud and dust at least an inch thick, and seemed to be sagging in his skin. It hadn't been easy finding a hideout of bandits, even with Hotohori's help.

"Why don't you go and get something to eat?" He asked, dismissing the soldier, not remembering to have someone show him around. Kouji was a horrible host.

Sighing, he tried to read the letter again. Why hadn't Genroh written it? It would seem logical...it wasn't like he often received correspondence from the Emperor of Konan. Kouji shrugged. Maybe they wanted it to be more official, or something.

The letter requested the help of him and his men, calling them to the borderlands of Kutou. Of course he would go, after all, any friend of Genroh's was a friend of his, but he still had trouble believing they were at war. Kutou had never been a friendly nation, of course, but war! It seemed so sudden. In the end, Kouji decided that war politics had never been his thing. He was more concerned with the mechanics, personally.

He'd leave Touma in charge while he was gone. He'd be taking maybe eighty-five percent of their forces. Kouji hated to leave them so unprotected. But of course, he wouldn't have to worry about the authority laying siege to the place; it was the emperor himself who'd sent for him. The only trouble they might have would be from a neighboring band of bandits. Kouji had to hope the natural rocky walls of the fort would be enough to fend off an attack until he got back.

Kouji sighed and leaned back in his chair. It creaked warningly in response to his weight. It was uncomfortable, just like everything else in the room. He hadn't realized how hard it would be, replacing the leader, or Genroh. There was so much he had to think about: food, clean water, and the general welfare of his men weren't something he ever had to worry about before, they'd always just been things that were there.

If Genroh were to come back right now and demand he hand over things to him, Kouji wouldn't protest. He was tired, mentally, physically, every way one could think of. He couldn't ever remember feeling like this.

Kouji rubbed his eyes and sighed. The place where the emperor asked him to come was nearly a hundred leagues from there, a week, maybe two weeks traveling at a grueling pace, with that many men in tow. And it would take some time to round up all the supplies and choose who was going and who was staying. The soonest he could get there would be three weeks, but he wouldn't be able to say how ready they'd be. Most of his men, he wasn't proud to admit, were just in the business for glory, fame, and fortune. A real battle, not just some skirmish with a couple of barely armed guards, would probably have most of them running.

Kouji laughed a little to himself. He was being a bit of a hypocrite. He'd never been in a real battle either, and it certainly wasn't the amazing living conditions that had attracted him in the first place. He wondered what had made Genroh join...

He shook himself before he got too deep in reverie. He would be seeing him soon, after all. Right now he needed to concentrate on getting ready to leave. The sense of urgency expressed in the letter made Kouji a bit nervous.

Not long now, something inside of him whispered. Not long...Until what? Kouji still couldn't shake the feeling of foreboding that everything seemed steeped in. Why did he feel like something bad was going to happen...? For a second, the ledgers in front of him he was futilely trying to study blurred.

Genroh...please be alright, he prayed, hoping that where ever the other man was he heard him.

++

He was asleep now, finally. He'd spent so many hours just talking about nothing in particular. Kouji had started to notice how his eyelids drooped and how he seemed to be boneless around the same time Tasuki started dropping off mid-sentence.

It was a beautiful summer night, the storm that had been raging for days had just broken. The air was filled with the scent of damp earth and rain. They were laying on the roof of the fort, watching the clouds recede into the darkening night sky. The stars were at their most beautiful, most vibrant, after a storm, Kouji thought, like they were trying to prove something by shining triumphantly.

His vision shifted to the younger man lying next to him. Just like the stars, he was beautiful and vibrant, but he didn't fade during the daylight...

The wind suddenly picked up, caressing skin with a moist kiss and toying with Tasuki's fiery hair. Kouji felt an empty kind of jealously run through him, for who could truly blame the wind?

"Genroh...Tasuki." Kouji said softly, hoping not to wake him. He rarely used that name, except when he was sleeping. It was such a personal thing, and he liked the feel of it on his lips. Unfortunately, it was the only thing of Tasuki's that was allowed on his lips.

Maybe it wouldn't have to be so, a part of him whispered, but he knew it was lying. Kouji didn't think he could ever be more than a best friend to Tasuki, and truly that was fine, even if he wasn't satisfied. He'd known to many people, seen it happen to many times, a secret is finally told and the friendship crumbles for it. He wouldn't risk it...he couldn't....

In the end, Kouji was just a coward. Because no one could ever measure up; he'd never...he'd never love someone the way he loved the man next to him. He was afraid of rejection, and so he'd always be alone. Not entirely, he told himself. His friendship had to be worth something. It had to be, or else, what was the point of going on anymore? Life was a quest for happiness, if the only way he could be happy was with Tasuki, then this would have to suffice.

And if it couldn't...? Kouji wouldn't let himself travel down that road. There was always a chance, no matter how bleak it seemed. He would never give up hope. It never rains everyday, his father used to say, before he died.

Tasuki mumbled something and inched closer to Kouji, unconsciously nuzzling his thigh. Kouji smiled and ran a hand through Tasuki's wild, soft hair. Why not tempt fate a little? Tasuki smiled in his sleep.

Looking up, Kouji realized that the horizon had finally cleared. He could see the miles of dark forest stretched out before him.

"Kouji..." Tasuki murmured softly. He was shocked for a moment, thinking the other man had woke up. Glancing down, however, he realized he was still quite asleep. Kouji replaced his hand on Tasuki's head. At least, he was in his thoughts...his dreams.

"Sweet dreams," Kouji said softly, lying back on the roof and covering the two of them with blankets.

You were right, Father. He thought. It doesn't rain everyday...

++

"Isn't this splendid? My right and left hands have finally met."

Tasuki woke with a start, accidentally jarring Suboshi from where he slept, making him whimper. The sneering voice was Nakago, he knew, but he didn't want to face him, especially first thing in the morning. Finally he just heaved a huge sigh and got up.

Nakago stood in the "doorway" of Suboshi's tent, looking a little more than slightly miffed. Tasuki focused on a point somewhere beyond his shoulder and worked on controlling his expression. If Suboshi was awake, he gave no clues.

"He was being punished. It was unnecessary for you to aid him." Nakago stated, eyeing the boy's bandages and wrappings.

Feeling a stroke of recklessness, Tasuki said, "If you wanted him to keep him as your left-hand man, it was." Nakago's eyes snapped back to him, expression unreadable.

"Thanks to me, he might be able to walk again, if he doesn't get a fever and die." Tasuki crossed his arms defiantly, feeling human for the first time in a long time. He didn't care what happened to him, indeed, he welcomed the end, and he was pissed.

"Are you challenging me?" Nakago asked quietly, pulling himself up to his full height and staring Tasuki down.

"And if I am? It's not my fault you are stupid enough to disable people who are a valuable resource to you." Tasuki raised his chin a fraction of inch, eyes sparkling hotly under tightly drawn brows. He watched as his statement pushed Nakago too far and his hand rose.

"Are you sure you want to cut both of your hands off? Right now, we're the best you got." Nakago's hand lowered, and Tasuki released a breath he hadn't been aware of holding. He missed, however, Nakago's left hand reaching up and encircling his throat, lifting him a good six inches off the floor.

"Don't ever make the mistake of thinking that you're necessary. You are a toy that I simply have not decided to break, yet." He squeezed tightly to emphasize his point before dropping him in a heap on the ground. Tasuki gasped loudly for air.

"However, you are a tough little toy," Nakago stated cryptically before turning to leave. Before going, though, he said, "Make sure he doesn't die." Tasuki missed the swirl of his cape as he walked out, returning to whatever duties a crazy, sadistic general had.

He sat there on the ground for a while, massaging his bruised throat. Suboshi finally turned his head to face him.

"Thank you. For everything." He said, closing his eyes before he started crying again. "I wish I had never been born a Seiryu warrior."

Tasuki couldn't help but notice the irony of the statement. "Your brother," he said, "he felt the same way."

"Amiboshi," Suboshi muttered.

"He'll be fine now. He's better off than both of us," Tasuki said, trying to comfort him. "There'll be war soon. You don't want him to caught up in that."

For a long time Suboshi was silent. Tasuki went to work cleaning the wounds and replacing the bandages.

"How do you feel about fighting your own country?" He finally asked. Tasuki rubbed his neck absently.

"I try not to." He looked away. "That's the best way." Suboshi seemed to understand, and didn't speak again. Tasuki continued taking care of him, and fed him when he was hungry. He didn't die.

Two weeks past, and Suboshi was able to walk around. That was fortunate, it was then that they started back for Kutou. Nakago had finally gotten the second shinzaho, Seiryu had been summoned. Tasuki tried not to think of his former teammates. He wished he could have been there to see all of it...

The trip was especially hard on Suboshi, but Tasuki was determined to keep him alive. He spent more time with the boy than he had spent with any other human being since Nuriko had died.

Another month and Suboshi was completely healed, but he would always carry scars of what had happened, physically, and emotionally, as well. In Kutou, the land of his birth, Suboshi seemed a bit happier. Perhaps being so far separated from his twin, not being able to constantly feel his presence, helped.

Tasuki didn't know what to expect from the foreign country, had know idea what was going to happen to him now. The country had no need to gear up for war, they were already under marshal law, the army in a constant state of readiness. They only had to wait for their opponent to show. Tasuki could feel the tenseness in the air. He felt ostracized more than ever.

Now that Kutou had the power of Seiryu, Tasuki had to wonder if Konan truly stood a chance. No doubt, there would be many lives lost. He almost hoped Konan wouldn't show up, would just surrender and be done with it. But he knew Hotohori, Miaka, and the rest, they would never give up, even if it was in their best interest. Another part of him couldn't wait for them to get here, just so it would all be over...Luckily, or unluckily, the wait wasn't long.

He was sitting in a room he claimed as his peeling apples when Suboshi came crashing in. They'd only arrived about three weeks ago.

"It's starting. We can see them, they're coming!" Tasuki didn't have to ask what he meant. This was it, then. What he'd been waiting for...what everyone had been waiting for. Was it really happening? For some reason, it didn't seem real. He was really going to take arms against his mother country? He'd been avoiding thinking about it for a long time. Tasuki suddenly felt unprepared.

"What now? What now?" He whispered to himself.

"Huh?" Suboshi asked, not noticing Tasuki's stricken expression. "Aren't you coming?"

"Give me a minute," Tasuki said. He wasn't ready, not ready...Please, could someone slow it down?

"Nakago wants us now!" Suboshi cried, dashing from the room. Tasuki's mind was still reeling. He was too far gone to convince himself that it was all just a dream.

Almost automatically he followed Suboshi out of the room and down the hall to where Nakago was waiting for them. The man was stunning in his military regalia, he must have looked just like Seiryu, Tasuki thought abstractly.

"Are you ready? I need to make sure everything is in order before I go before my troops." Nakago began, eyeing Tasuki. "Won't this be fun for you? To fight against your friends and family." He chuckled nastily.

"My family is dead. Or they should be." Tasuki replied, hating the pleasure Nakago was taking in this.

"Very well, then you won't mind killing your kinsmen. Suboshi, Tasuki, go."

They did, and left to get armed up, or rather, for Suboshi to get armed up and for Tasuki to watch. Tasuki had never worn armor into a battle or when he was a bandit, and he wasn't going to start now. Suboshi yammered on excitedly about the battle, not meaning to be callous but doing it anyway.

Everything passed in a whirl, he couldn't remember what Nakago had said to get the troops so riled up, only that he had. Tasuki had stood by while the general had spoken, seeing and hearing nothing. He had never been so at a loss before.

There was a horrible moment just as Konan troops arrived and he saw his former allies, looking tired and solemn, but not beaten. They looked about the amassed troops of Kutou like they still could win it, like there was actually a chance. Then it struck him. Where was Chiriko? Was it possible that he had stayed behind? No, he didn't think they would deny him a chance to fight for his country and his god.

He was dead, then.

When? Where? Was this his fault, too? Chiriko...Chiriko was had been his best friend, throughout all of that. Tasuki's chest ached and his throat closed up. He was so overcome with grief he didn't notice the swords being drawn and the men taking off, running.

He would have liked to say good-bye.

"For Suzaku and the Priestess! Miaka!" The voices of his former kinsmen pierced through his haze, punctuated with the clash of steel on steel and flesh. The cries of the dying echoed through his head like banshees. He watched a man fall beside him, a deep gash separating his head from his neck. Tasuki looked away, only to be faced with an achingly familiar face.

"Tasuki." Tamahome said, his face betraying nothing. His eyes were colder than Tasuki ever remembered seeing them; he had to look away.

"Tamahome," Tasuki said to the ground.

"I had thought that you were smart enough to stay away from here. Although I am surprised to see you still alive." Tamahome growled.

"I missed you, too." Tasuki said, still not meeting his eyes, but laughing to himself. He missed the lightening quick action that brought Tamahome's dagger to his neck.

"How could I forget you, Tasuki? After all you've done for us?" Tamahome's face was close to his now, but he was yelling all the same. The pressure increased on the dagger and drew a fine line of blood as Tasuki took another breath. His vision still remained focused on something far past Tamahome's head.

"Well? Say something!" Tamahome demanded.

"What is there to say? If I said I was sorry, you'd only kill me." Tasuki answered.

"I'm beginning to think that's what you're looking for, Tasuki." He said. "Your presence here alone, tells me that." Tasuki stared at him, waiting.

"So should I finish it for you? Should I end it?" Tamahome asked. Tasuki winced as the dagger was drawn in deeper. A little more and he would meet the same fate as the soldier laying beside him.

"If it would make you happy, Tamahome, then by all means." Tasuki raised his chin a fraction, presenting his already bloody neck to the other man. He was surprised when the weapon was pulled away and Tamahome backed off.

"Only one thing makes me happy in this world now. Everything I do, I do for her. And I don't think killing you would please her." Tamahome said. He turned around, looking for another Kutou soldier to kill.

"Wait! Miaka, where is she?" Tasuki cried to his retreating back.

"She's safe," Tamahome answered. He didn't look back. Tasuki's eyes followed him until they lost sight of him in the fray. It was the last he ever saw of the Suzaku Seven's shining leader.

"And stay dead, bastard!" Tasuki heard a familiar voice scream from somewhere close to him. A voice he hadn't been expecting among those of his friends. Tasuki's world suddenly came to a screeching halt.

What? It couldn't be...they wouldn't have...

Tasuki slowly turned around.

++

How could it be? How could it be?! How could Genroh have done such a thing? Impossible! Kouji couldn't believe it.

When he'd arrived, he'd expected Genroh to be there, to greet him as he rode up with his men. It had been a hard journey, moving that fast with so many, but the prospect of seeing Genroh again made the trek seem more endurable. Kouji had been surprised when only a handful of Genroh's friends showed up to welcome him. It was then that his Highness and the Priestess had told him.

Tasuki had betrayed them.

Tasuki was with Kutou now.

Kouji had been unable to move, to speak, for several minutes. Surely they were lying! Playing a cruel joke on him and any minute now Genroh would spring from behind one of these pillars. A quick check revealed them all to be Genroh-less.

How could it be? Kouji asked himself for the millionth time. What had they done to him to make him that way? The Genroh Kouji knew would not have! The Genroh Kouji loved...

Hotohori had offered him a choice then. He could return home, forget about the summons, and pretend like nothing was happening. Or he could fight with them, against his best friend. Or he could join him. Hotohori was a generous man, Kouji found.

Kouji thought about it all night. What came first? His love or his country? Could he just forget about it? No. He couldn't just run away. He couldn't join those pigs either. So he should stay with Konan. But what about Genroh? His thoughts raced round circle.

In the end, his bedroom in tatters, he reached a decision. He had to stay with Konan. His conscience would not let it be otherwise. He would fight his friend--if he was still alive, the Suzaku warriors felt the need to point out.

Kouji almost thought it better for him to think like that.

++

Kouji was wiping blood off his face with the back of his hand, and so did not immediately see his old friend. As his eyes shifted from the corpse to scan the battlefield, his vision lighted to Tasuki.

They were still, staring at each other for a few moments as the war was waging around them.

"Genroh!" Kouji exclaimed softly, but Tasuki could hear him. He'd always been able to hear him.

"What are you doing here?" Tasuki mouthed, he couldn't find his voice. He wasn't supposed to see him like this...out of everyone...

Kouji finally started to move to him. When they met, Tasuki had to fight not to throw himself in the other man's arms and sob.

"They told me. About what happened." Kouji said. "I didn't believe them until I saw you here."

"Kouji..." Tasuki couldn't meet his eyes.

"I preferred to think you dead."

"Kouji!"

"Why did you do it?" Kouji asked. "Tell me that. Tell me that so I don't have to hate you anymore..."

"You weren't supposed to see me like this! Not you! I should've died a long time ago." Tasuki's eyes filled with tears; he was crying. More than anything, he'd expected comfort from this man, compassion, understanding, unconditional...what? Love? Yes, that was what he'd been expecting. But people have their limits, he supposed.

"Just tell me why you did it!! What did you get? Money? Because we had lots of that!" Kouji was accusing, his eyes hot and angry. Why wouldn't anyone just kill him? So much better than a stranger, at least. It would certainly hurt less than what Kouji was putting him through.

"No! Nothing like that! You wouldn't understand!"

"Try me."

"I...I--" Tasuki began. His fists clenched at his sides, the tears streamed down his face. How could he tell him how pathetic he was? How much lower would his opinion drop of him? Kouji was the one person with whom he had ever been entirely happy; only happy memories, all the others brought him pain to remember the good times. He'd just ruined that, too.

Another skirmish broke out behind him. It was dangerous and stupid, to be so vulnerable during a battle. Looking down, he noticed Kouji's weapon. That was good. He could protect himself with that. His eyes trailed from the weapon to meet Kouji's eyes, the same color as his.

"Are you going to kill me, or not?" Tasuki asked. His eyes cleared of tears and he stopped shaking. Now that everything had been taken from him...And it was all his fault. All his fault.

"What?!" Kouji asked, the sudden question taking him off guard. "Why..." The look in Tasuki's eyes was scaring him. Such utter desolation and pain. Tasuki never should have had to look like that.

"You have no idea, what it's been like, living like this for so long." Tasuki stared at the ground, his hair hiding much of his face. "What kind of agony I go through everyday...If you have any mercy at all, you'll kill me."

"Genroh...what's happened to you?" Kouji looked horrified, appalled at seeing his friend, who was always the stronger of the two of them, deteriorated to such a state. Looking up and catching Kouji's expression, Tasuki became angry.

"You won't even do this for me? Do I really deserve all of this?" His eyes flew up, directing his last question heavenward. "Fine. Fine. I'll do it myself." He grabbed a fallen soldier's weapon, and before Kouji could think to stop him, plunged it deep into his midsection.

"Genroh!" Kouji cried, catching him as he fell.

"Ow...It hurts." Tasuki groaned, warm purple blood slipping between his fingers. For some reason he hadn't been expecting this much pain. In a matter of seconds, both Tasuki's and Kouji's hands were slick with the stuff.

"My God..." Kouji rasped out, beginning to cry himself. "What have you done? What have you done?!" The blood continued to flow, despite the hard pressure he was applying.

"I did it, at first, because I was intrigued." Tasuki continued, ignoring the other man. "Nakago..." Kouji shook his head. All of a sudden, he didn't want to hear this. He didn't need to hear this anymore.

"I was looking for something." He managed. "I was looking for someone..."

"Just, just shut up, would you?" Kouji scanned the battlefield for anything, anyone that could help them. All he saw was death.

Tasuki glared up at him, eyes flashing. "You wanted to hear this!" He coughed, blood ran down his chin, mimicking the tears on Kouji's face. "I wanted what everyone else had. Like Miaka and Tamahome. But I was stupid, and was looking in the wrong place."

Kouji's eyes closed, trying to block out his friend's pained, relieved expression. If only he'd told him earlier. "You couldn't find it here? With me?" Kouji asked, taking his friend's face, wiping off the blood. Suddenly Tasuki's eyes opened.

"You? All this time?" Tasuki laughed, bringing more blood. "It's ironic...I never knew. Why did you never tell me?"

"...I--" Kouji looked down, hiding his eyes. "I was getting around to it..."

Tasuki laughed again. It was a wet, sick sound. "It's...it's good to know, at least. A bit late, though..." His eyes closed again.

"Tasuki...don't." Kouji sobbed.

Tasuki has never heard Kouji call that name aloud; he missed it this time, too.

++

It was raining as he returned to Reikaku. It had been raining since the battle had ended. So far, it didn't show any signs of stopping. Kouji stared straight ahead as his horse tried to pick its way through the sludge. He didn't bother to wear a cowl or cape. What was the point? It would be soaked through in seconds.

Many had died in that battle, of Kutou and Konan, alike. Too many for individual burying, they'd opted for funeral pyres. It was surprising, that so many could die in so short a time. The battle had only lasted a few hours before the emperor was killed and Nakago had disappeared. The fighting had come to an abrupt standstill then. He never met with any of the remaining Suzaku Seven, after, deciding to just go home, his duties for his country fulfilled.

A horse with a lone rider approached him from behind.

The duties he'd ignored for far too long were finally taking precedence.

"You shouldn't be riding yet." He said, not looking over.

"You worry too much." The rider replied.

"Maybe," Kouji replied. "I have my eyes on you, now."

"Did they ever leave?"

"Yes. Look what happened, Genroh." Kouji smiled and glanced over to the hooded figure riding next to him. He looked away, hiding his face in the cape.

"Just forget about it for now. You'll live long enough to pay back your debt here. Like my father used to say, it doesn't rain everyday." Kouji laughed and extended his arms, wrapping one around his partner, the other reaching for the sky.

"No. It can't rain everyday." Tasuki finally agreed. He gazed up into the sky, letting the storm envelop him.

THE END