=My own experience with Lord Of The Rings=

I do not own LOTR or anything else, but my siblings and I, I do. ^_^

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Thank you!

More to come, if you like it!

Chapter 22:

My Birthday!

"It's my Birthday!" I sang out loudly, a few weeks later. It seemed as if everyone needed to be prepared for going into Mordor.

"How do you figure?" Chi asked, looking over from her archery practice.

"Because!" I said, "If Frodo awoke on the 24th of October, then today counts out being my birthday!"

"But wasn't is Spring when we left home? How long have we been gone?" She asked, frowning.

"Well, yeah, it was… I figure that time's different here or something." I said, scratching my head.

"Time? How did he get here?" She said, then winked, "In-joke! Boy, there's a lot of them in this story, ne?"

"Well, yeah…" I said, "But I can't help it!"

Soon it was lunch time.

"So, I hear it's your birthday?" Merry asked me as we sat down at the table. Chi was sitting by Gandalf, of course, and I was sitting by the Hobbits.

"How old are you then?" Pippin asked. Everyone looked at Pippin in shock.

"You don't just ask a lady how old she is." Sam said to Pippin, "They don't like it."

"She's an old bag!" Chi spoke up, "A whole nineteen years old!"

Everyone stared in shock at me for a moment.

"Are you really so young?" Sam asked, looking at me worriedly.

"And what of it?" I muttered, "It isn't my fault. She's fifteen! Or is it sixteen?" I pointed at Chi.

Again there was silence. Gandalf looked uncomfortable for a moment, then turned back to his food.

"In honor of it being my birthday, I am going to present you with a little skit, which most of you will hate me for!" I hopped up on an empty table, "Get up here, Chi."

"What are you doing a skit about?" She asked, getting up on top of the table too.

"And now, ladies and gentlemen, we are pleased to present to you a skit about how Gollum got the Ring in the first place!" I said, in my stage voice.

"I don't know how that goes! I haven't read the book!" Chi said. I elbowed her in the ribs.

"It's in the book. Just play along." I said, turning back to the audience, "I am Deagol, and this is my cousin Smeagol. We're going fishing today."

I fell to the table dramatically, "SUDDENLY, a great fish grabbed my line and DRUG me to the bottom of the lake!"

I jumped back up, "After getting loose, I swam to shore, *cough* coughing and *sputter* sputtering! But I found something in the lake! It was shiny and pretty. As I sat on the shore, staring at the Ring," I sat on the table, "My cousin came up with greed in his eyes."

"A Ri-i-i-ng…" Chi (as Smeagol) said, looking at my hand with wide eyes.

"It is mine. I found it." I (as Deagol) said, meanly. She stood and looked blankly at me for a moment, then returned to character as she came up with an idea.

"Dear cousin…" She said, slyly, "You haven't given me my birthday present yet. I want that! Forget about your other one!"

"I have so given you one. It was expensive too. You can't have this, you greedy being. I found it and I'm going to keep it. So there." I stuck my tongue out at her.

"I want T-H-A-T!" She said, leaping for my throat. I fell, dead to the ground. We rose and bowed, although there were no applause in the hall at all.

"You can go back to eating your lunch." I told Chi, who was returning to her own personality. She did, and I stayed on the table.

"Here is the poem that surrounds the Ring, although I am sure that you all know it well." I said, "*Ahem*

Three Rings for the Elven-kings under the sky,

Seven for the Dwarf-lords in their hills of stone,

Nine for Mortal Men doomed to die,

One for the Dark Lord on his dark throne

In the Land of Mordor where Shadows lie

One Ring to rule them all, One Ring to find them,

One Ring to bring them all and in the darkness bind them

In the Land of Mordor where the Shadows lie."

No one clapped. My sister was busy eating, so no one wanted to at all. They all watched me in shock and horror.

"Well done, ain't it?" I said, in another voice, "Old Prince John is having an archery tournament tomorrow."

"An archery tournament? Ol' Rob could win that standing on his head." I continued my skit of one.

"Thank you, Little John, but I'm sure we're not invited."

"There'll be one very disappointed if you don't come."

"Yeah, ol' bushel-britches, the honorable sheriff of Nottingham."

"No, Maid Marian."

"Maid Marian?"

"Yeah, she's gonna give a kiss to the winner."

"A kiss to the winner? Did you hear that John? What are you waiting for?"

"I don't remember the next line exactly, so here is my next part!" I said, "Hmm… what next…?"

Chi slammed her glass down on the table. I watched her as she jumped up onto the table and started posing, "Darkness beyond twilight,

Crimson beyond blood that flows!

Buried in the stream of time is where your power grows!

I pledge myself to conquer all the foes who stand

before the mighty gift bestowed placed in my unworthy hand!

Let the fools who stand before me be destroyed by the power you and I possess!"

"DRAGON SLAVE!"

Both of us shouted at the same time, doing a motion along with it. The Elves all started filing out of the dining hall, getting bored with us.

"Ah, who needs you anyhow!" I shouted, throwing a shoe at them and missing, "Let's get back to my party!"

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Two references in this one:

Disney's Robin Hood

Slayers

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I was looking at what time of the year it took place and found that my b-day took place when we were in Rivendell! Sorry that the Gollum thing wasn't too accurate, but my sis hasn't read the books yet! Wasn't it too exciting? Review!