Departure Scars
Chapter 10:
"Make it better"I...I...uh...liked...you...a lot...maybe even...loved you and I couldn't understand why you had to go...It was so childish of me, but I understand now...I really do and I'm sorry for the way every thing happened...and is now." She confessed in a sudden rush. Tears welled up in her eyes. "I'm sorry..." She repeated.
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Kaoru could feel her face growing hot and the tears in her eyes burned, but she had to see him. Did he resent her now? Slowly, she turned her face to his. It wasn't what she had expected. His face was of half surprise and half relief. "Relief?" She gave a shuddering sigh.
"If...you don't feel for me...that way...I understand...I mean...if you just liked me as I friend or sister...you can say if you want to...I can take it. It wouldn't be as bad as you leaving--I-I mean...um...sorry...I..." Her face tightened up, suppressing her unshed tears. Her lip trembled in regret. "Oh God...could I have said anything stupider?!"
"It's alright." He assured, his voice barely a whisper. Kaoru gave him a puzzled look. "I do feel for you Kaoru-dono." She felt disappointment drop into her stomach. "Probably as much as you do for me." Her eyes lit up and her heart pounded. "I'm sorry for not telling you sooner. I guess I just thought that it would be to dangerous to be with you like that. Someone could of tried to attack you or murder you. But...I've been thinking. Jin-eh held you hostage and so did the pirates. My opinion didn't really have much effect." He paused. "But I am so sorry for the way I left you. I don't know what I can do to have your forgiveness. Maybe what I did isn't forgivable, but..."
"Hey, hey...it's alright. I forgive you. I just told you I understood why you left didn't I?" She reminded softly. He nodded.
"Hai..."
"But you really love me?" Kaoru could barely suppress the urge to jump into his lap and kiss him. Her tears flowed over her cheeks. A smile formed on her young face.
"Aa...I love you." He answered shyly. That was it. In a burst of ecstatic happiness, Kaoru lunged her body forward against his and rapped her arms around his neck tightly. She inhaled his masculine sent and let her fingertips lightly brush against his soft red hair. She could feel the lean muscles under his gi against her chest. They were firm and soft. A lot less tense then they had been the last time she had been against him.
"I love you too." She whispered into his ear as the moment they shared became a piece of forever in her heart. She had longed for a moment with her love like this since she could remember. She had missed him unbearably! She felt his arms move up and lay gently around her middle back, pulling her closer to him. For how long they stayed in the warm comfort of each other's arms was unknown. It seem to last only a second to them as they leaned apart finally.
"Do you have to go back to Kyoto now?" Kaoru asked, breaking the comfortable silence.
"...Aa." He answered. Her eyes cast downwards. She fought the surge of sadness, but she wouldn't let herself act the way she did last time.
Then a sudden idea popped into her head.
"Could I go with you?" she looked into his eyes pleadingly. "Onegai?"
"It wouldn't be safe for you...Someone could attack us at any time and I don't think I could protect you and me." He said ruefully.
"Well...we could come after you and stay at a inn in Kyoto." she suggested. "I really don't want you do go to battle...I hate it when you fight and get injured. But I guess I have no choice...so...I understand that you have to and I'll wait for you."
"That could work..." He admitted.
"Good!" Kaoru hugged him again and sat back down on the ground. They watched the fire for a while longer each grinning subconsciously in happiness and relief.
"Ano...will you come stay at the dojo tonight?" Kaoru asked. "I don't want you to stay out in the cold again. Nothing in your room has changed since you left. Except maybe a little dust."
"It'll be alright with you?" He seemed surprised.
"Sure!"
"I guess it would be okay." He replied. "I just need to get my things." He stood up and brushed the dirt of the back of his pants with his hands. Kaoru stood up as well and began to smother the fire while he folded up his blanket and stuffed it into his small traveling bag.
"Hey um...can I ask you something?" She asked.
"Go right ahead."
"Ano...what is your...name?" Kaoru wondered, very embarrassed.
"My name?" He echoed, looking puzzled.
"...Yeah."
"It's Himura Kenshin de gozaru. Why do you ask?" He said still seeming confused.
"Well I sort of...hit my head while you were gone and uh, forget a couple of things...like your name." Kaoru stammered.
"How did you do that?!"
"Oh, well, I was just trying a new technique and it went wrong..."
"Are you alright?!"
"I'm perfectly fine." Kaoru lied, waving her hand in dismissal of the subject.
"Did you forget anything else?" He asked curiously.
"Nope. Just that." She lied again, not wanting to go into the details. She never wanted him to know how horridly she had acted in his absence and what she had done to everyone...and to herself. She felt so ashamed that it almost made her sick.
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When they arrived at the dojo, Kenshin found that in fact, his room had not changed a bit. Even the futon he had used before was left was still folded up on the floor, in the middle of the room, unmoved.
"Yes...it's a bit dusty." Kaoru said thoughtfully.
"That's alright." Kenshin assured, smiling through the darkness. "What about tomorrow?" He asked urgently.
"Tomorrow...I don't know."
"What will Yahiko, Sanosuke Megumi do?"
"Um...I'll tell them..." Kaoru paused, remembering that he was usually the one to wake first. " Stay in your room until I come and get you. I'll figure the rest out when it happens..." She answered slowly. Kenshin nodded.
"Okay. I'll see you in the morning then. Oyasuminasai Kaoru-dono." He stepped forwards slightly.
"Oyasuminasai." Kaoru replied, rapping her arms around him. Kenshin pulled her against him gently and embraced her.
"Aishiteru Kaoru." he whispered. She smiled. Kenshin had just called her by her name, without the respectful and sometimes annoying, 'dono'. She hugged him tighter.
"I love you too, Kenshin." She whispered, turning her head upwards, so she could look into his eyes. She leaned against him, licking her lips subconiously. She could feel the heat of his breath flowing gently on her face. His lips parted. And in one moment they joined. They're warm lips pushing against one another; letting the heat of their love flow together. Their delayed happiness finally united for an instant. And in one moment they parted, looking lovingly into each other's eyes.
"Good night..." They whispered and separated for the nights rest.
Translations:
Aa- yes, yeah
Gi- Kenshin's shirt
Onegai- please
Ano- um
De gozaru- Kenshin's little thingy he says at the end of a sentence. Like, 'indeed it is' ect.
Oyasuminasai- good night
Aishiteru- I love you
Author's Notes: Well! I finished another chapter! Summer's here and I think I might get this story finished by the end of the summer...maybe. I hope you like my fic so far!
THANK YOU FOR YOUR REVIEWS! KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK! ^_^ I ALWAYS LIKE REVIEWS!
Anyways, right now I'm hoping that I can get the rest of this fic online because the thingy isn't working! STILL!!! *grrr* You have no idea how much this bugs me! *bangs head on desk*
P.S. I'm so glad I don't have to feel like that anymore.*grins* Yay it still works!! ^-^
