Don't Say a Word
Part One: Whisper in the night
Disclaimer: I do not own Lizzie McGuire; I do however own this story line. I also do not own Madonna's "Frozen" which is used in the middlish end of this chapter.
Notes: This is a five part piece; each chapter will be pretty long. Thoughts are in Italics. This story is rate PG-13 for language and some semi-sexual content. The song will be in plain bold text.
Some things are better left unsaid
Secrets should remain secrets
Everyone has skeletons in their closet…
It was a cold December night. The wind howled outside Kate Sanders' window as she appeared to be asleep in her bed. She had to get out; the minute after her parents came in to check on their precious angel. She tried so hard not to giggle like an innocent school girl doing something immoral, as her parents opened the door.
Mr. and Mrs. Sanders entered their daughter's bedroom as the wind howled louder and louder. Kate hoped they wouldn't take a long time with their "Good nights". The sounds of their stumbling feet made it apparent that they were drunk as hell, it wasn't exactly a rarity that it happened, alcoholism ruled over her parents with a clenched iron fist.
Mr. and Mrs. Sanders were held in high regard in the small community. They were both involved in politics and were among the rich snoots that were among the minority of the town. It was in Kate's blood to eventually become her mother's clone, and that happened between the summer of sixth and seventh grade. She matured physically, mentally, and emotionally, and had regrets about her change everyday since. All she wanted to do was to be accepted. She wanted to be the center of attention and wanted to feel like she belonged. There were many disadvantages to being in such high power. She was like a noble woman, as much as she was idolized by everyone else, her relationships, both intimate and platonic were for alliances of power. She also couldn't love anyone outside of her social circle, which was the worst restriction of them all.
"Goodnight sweetie," Kate's mother slurred as she caught on to her father's shoulder.
"You really should get some rest, Helen."
"Yeah, probably Bryant."
Kate heard her parents' footsteps scuff into the distance. She opened one eye and looked all around. She no longer heard the footsteps and assumed it was safe. It was never safe. It was never safe to sneak out of a third story window at midnight, go down winding streets in the middle of the night, just to see someone who actually cared about her. She waited five minutes before quietly creeping out of bed.
What's the use of creeping quietly? They're probably passed out in their bedroom; it's not exactly a rarity or anything.
She lifted one leg out of bed and touched it silently to the floor, making sure not to make a noise. She then lifted the other one to the floor and did the same thing. Kate then tip toed out of bed so delicately, as though she was walking on a glass and didn't want to break it. She cautiously looked around. She didn't know why she was so nervous; she had done this for about six months, and kept a secret that was a burden on her shoulders. She didn't know why she had to keep it a secret. She didn't care about the glitz and the glamour anymore, she never did after she found out it cost her, her friends. She had grown accustomed to it, but that didn't make a petty difference. She then got up on her window sill and opened the window. The cold December wind blew into her face and blew her blonde curls back and sent a shiver down her spine. She began to reconsider her midnight outing, but decided that this was indeed what she wanted as she closed the window slightly and began to climb down the trellis. She climbed carefully like a cat gripping. Kate never liked heights, but she put her fear aside. Then landing after a two feet jump to the ground, she ran into darkness of the night.
She tried very hard not to be seen, first of all, people would wonder why a sixteen year old was running at midnight, second of all, it was an hour after the town curfew, but she couldn't care less about some stupid restriction. She had escaped her restrictions before and never got caught.
The coldness pierced her cheeks as she ran towards the park. It was too cold out for a California night, but nothing had stopped her before, and it wouldn't now. Nothing would stop Kate from what she wanted. Nothing and no one would get in her way, or even dare to get in her way.
She ran down the winding streets, trying to keep herself out of plain sight. It was especially hard to keep herself out of plain sight as tonight was a bright-lit full moon that gave a beautiful shimmer to the dark cobalt sky. How terribly cold it was for Kate who was just wearing a short sleeve pajama shirt, cotton pinstripe pajama bottoms, a terry cloth robe, and white fuzzy slippers. More chills went down her spine as the wind blew harder and faster and became much more frigid. The chills were from the coldness and mixed with fear. Even though meeting him was a habitual thing, it was still a very risky ordeal.
Every so often when a car came by, she would jump into a bush. She never knew who was in the car. For all she knew it could be Claire or Ethan coming home from some rave. She was constantly feeling fear as a primary emotion. Her secret could destroy her. She needed the power, she craved the power. But, was the power really worth it? If she couldn't love or be seen with anyone supposedly lower than her, was it actually worth all of the restrictions? Her mind had been filled with thoughts of worry, fear, and occasionally happiness. That was only when she saw him though. It was kind of tragic how her only happiness was because of him, she was still holding on to a small strand though. The thought of losing the only person who seemed to care about her was the worst case scenario she could think of.
Finally, after hiding in many bushes and quietly scampering down the twisted streets and alleys, she arrived at Hilton Park. Hilton Park was full of beautiful gardens, fountains, and beautiful shrubbery that had the most intricate designs you could think of. The clear water from the fountains sparkled in the lights from the street lights and the glimmering moon.
Kate then felt a tap on her shoulder and let out a high pitched shriek. She
didn't know who it could be. It could be an axe murder or rapist for all she
knew.
"Kate! Kate! It's me! Gordo," the voice reassured her.
She turned around quickly and let out a sigh of relief. It was indeed Gordo, standing there in all of his glory. He had changed from his junior high days in the physical sense. He still had his dark locks of curly hair and his deep crystal blue eyes that shimmered endlessly in the moonlight. He had now a taller stature and was no longer rejected because of his height, even though that was only a one time thing. He gained some muscle all around was no longer in the awkward stage of adolescence. Even though his looks changed, he was still the philosophical Gordo he had always been. Kate still appeared to be the snobby, ruthless cheerleader she had always been, but it was only a bogus façade to cover her deep insecurities and complex emotions that no one understood. She still looked the same, but looks don't really shape who you are in the emotional sense. If a tree was ugly and unbearable to look at, it would still give us the fresh oxygen we need to breath.
"Gordo! You scared the living daylights out of me!"
"I had to establish my presence some how," he chuckled as she rolled her eyes. They both knew that the other was being sarcastic. That was a similarity between the two. They were both witty and sarcastic. Kate wasn't your stereotypical dumb blonde; she had feelings and thoughts that weren't just about the superficial things in life. And that's what Gordo liked about her. He didn't like her because she wore pounds of cosmetics and designer clothes. He liked her because underneath all of the glitter and glam, lived and breathed the real Kate Sanders, the sarcastic, funny girl that he had known before she took a turn for the worst.
"You always do that, it's quite an old act, Gordon," she chuckled.
"Well, oh well," he shrugged.
The two then went to a bench near one of the fountains. They were concealed in the darkness and could only see each other in the moonlight. It didn't matter that they were in the darkness, it only mattered that they were with each other.
"What's bothering you, Sanders," he asked raising an eyebrow.
"Same as always, the parental units got drunk; Claire is being a hoity bitch. And this secret is killing me inside. Why can't we just tell people about it? I mean who really cares if we're dating, as long as we're happy," she yelled ferociously.
"You know how Lizzie feels about me. I really don't want to hurt her by telling her or having her see that we're together," he responded shyly.
"Doesn't she know that the two of you are just friends and that she had her chance a long time ago and should live with the guilt forever and ever? Who cares about poor little Lizzie McGuire," she screeched.
Gordo gave Kate a cold look. He was quite flabbergasted by her comment. Perhaps she was still the selfish Kate Sanders that lived for the superficial things in life. He didn't know what to believe.
"Why did you say that," was the only thing he could say. He looked at her with hurtful eyes. Lizzie was his best friend, and even though he had no intimate feelings towards her that he felt before, he still looked out for her, as if she were his little sister.
"Because I don't want to lose you! You're the only who cares about me and understands me," she yelled tearfully.
Flashback-Six months ago
It was midnight. Kate sat in the park crying while the moonlight added a sparkle to her tears. She had snuck out of the house after her mother hit her and called her many insulting names after getting in a fight about god knows what. Gordo was walking through the park at the time because of insomnia. He heard sobs in the distance. Being the nice guy he was, he wanted to see if he could do anything to help. He noticed a figure huddled in a fetal position, crying her eyes out on the bench. He approached her silently.
"Excuse me, are you okay," he whispered into the night.
"I don't need your sympathy, Gordon," she screeched. He figured by the nasty and hateful tone of her voice that it was indeed Kate. She turned to him and glared. "What are you doing here?"
You only see what
your eyes want to see
How can life be what you want it to be
You're frozen
When your heart's not open
"Couldn't sleep, too worried about testing week. Decided to take a walk in the park, since it's so conveniently located near my house," he chuckled sarcastically. "What are you doing here?"
"Crying like a whining baby," she snapped. "For a smart guy, you're really dumb."
"Why are you crying," he asked inquisitively.
"Because," she said. "My mom is a total bitch, all of my friends are fake and just use me for power and Ethan called me a 'prude bitch' because I wouldn't have sex with him and everyone hates me, even I hate me."
You're so consumed
with how much you get
You waste your time with hate and regret
You're broken
When your heart's not open
"I don't hate you. Sure at times I may dislike you, but I could never hate you. You're a good person, you've just made some bad decisions in your life, everyone does," He smiled. She looked at him oddly and raised an eyebrow. "You're not like other people, Kate. You're just fake because of your own insecurities. I can't blame you, as confident as I look, I have insecurities."
Mmmmmm, if I could
melt your heart
Mmmmmm, we'd never be apart
Mmmmmm, give yourself to me
Mmmmmm, you hold the key
"You? Insecure? Like that's possible," she appeared to be a little relieved that she had someone to relate to, someone who may have the same insecurities she did.
"Yeah, I mean, do you know how hard it is to juggle the Future Film makers of America club, Mathletes, editor of the school newspaper, and a 3.96 GPA?! It drives me crazy."
Now there's no point
in placing the blame
And you should know I suffer the same
If I lose you
My heart will be broken
"That's kind of obvious. That you're crazy anyway," she chuckled sarcastically.
"You're kind of all right when you're not surrounded by the future fast food workers of America," he said flirtatiously. She gave no response. She just sat there and absorbed everything her environment. She took in the fact that there was another human being who she could relate to. She took in the fact that Gordo hurt, not as much as she did, but he still did. She took in the fact that maybe Ethan wasn't the one for her and that she formed an attraction to Gordo.
Love is a bird, she
needs to fly
Let all the hurt inside of you die
You're frozen
When your heart's not open
Gordo sat there with her in the awkward silence. The only sound that could be heard was that of the warm wind. It caressed their faces and gave Kate a sense of warmth and safety, like that of a mother's warm touch.
Gordo looked at Kate. He saw that she wasn't a fake snot with priorities that included perfect hair, perfect boyfriend, and oodles and oodles of money. He saw that she was a real person who felt complex emotions and hurt deep down in the dim caves of her soul. The two teenagers looked at each other and smiled. They knew what the other was thinking, which is that they probably belonged together, even though various opinions of the student body stated that Kate belonged with Ethan and Gordo belonged with Lizzie. They didn't care. They didn't care about what those mindless trendoids thought; they only care about each other thought.
Mmmmmm, if I could
melt your heart
Mmmmmm, we'd never be apart
Mmmmmm, give yourself to me
Mmmmmm, you hold the key
You only see what
your eyes want to see
How can life be what you want it to be
You're frozen
When your heart's not open
You're so consumed with how much you get
You waste your time with hate and regret
You're broken
When your heart's not open
Mmmmmm, if I could
melt your heart
Mmmmmm, we'd never be apart
Mmmmmm, give yourself to me
Mmmmmm, you hold the key
In one sudden movement, they kissed. It was a simple kiss that released emotions buried deep within them. Kate pulled away and looked at Gordo. Was this what she wanted?
End Flashback
Well, obviously it was if they kept up the charade for six months and counting. The flood of memories came back to Gordo. He realized that all of the sleuthing and concealing was worth it all. It was worth the fact that they confided in each other and bonded together. Kate smiled at the thoughts of that fateful night. They seemed happy, happy and content. And they were, for now anyway.
[A/N: And part one is complete. In the spirit of Valentine's Day, I have started this five part Kate/Gordo romance. I've always been interested in writing about this pairing and is one of my favorite pairings. I tried not to rush it, but it seems a tad rushed, but it's better than the other three versions of part one. L/G is getting pretty old with the whole washed up plot over and over again. Eh, I have no clue what's going to happen next. It also maybe a little longer than five parts…yeah! Please review with your thoughts, and I assure you it will get better.]
