Poo Llama: Chapter 2

"We're SORRY Cloud! God! When're you gonna forgive us?!", Barret complained. Cloud was sitting in one of the wrecked booths, arms crossed and pouting,"Well MAYBE if you had pulled me out yesterday and didn't wait till today, I won't be so fucking pissed!". Barret 'psh'ed,"Yeah, whatever Cloud. You can go on another one of your little hissy fits. But I'm not letting it ruin MY day! Oh ho no!".
With that, Barret stormed out of the restaurant. Cid looked baffled,"Yeah...okay. I'd say that went pretty well!". Cloud slapped Cid upside the head.

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Barret was in his 1945 Beetle. You can imagine how silly he looked, the local children threw cheese at him and laughed. He was driving to his favorite hang out (besides White Trash Seventh Heaven), the 'Pool'. Little did Barret know, his second favorite hangout was a men's bath house.
He blasted down the road at a roaring 25 MPH! He hit a few squirrels here and there, a couple cattle and a wooly mammoth. After about three and a half hours, he reached the Pool.
He waltzed in, literally, and knocked the door open. A chinese man with a thong was behind the counter. "THREE DOLLAH!", he screamed. Barret jumped back,"Alright Sergio! Relax!". He reached into his pocket and pulled out two one dollar bills, 99 pennies and a booger. After which he threw them at Sergio and walked in.
A machine automatically stripped him of all his clothing and a skimpy towel fell on his head. "I...am Sancho...", he thought to himself as he placed it on his crotch. He then walked down a long hallway lined with doors. Some had numbers on them, others had letters, and some had ebonics. Throughout the hallway, grunting noises could be heard behind each door, and still, Barret remained oblivious.
After what seemed like hours (and it was), he reached a door that said "Crap: Barret" on it. What did this mean? Well nothing really, chances are that this door was constructed by a retarded Sophmore. Barret took it upon himself to walk into the room. Inside were seven and a half beds, two vietnamese men, an australian midget, a south african man-whore, and a french hermaphrodite. Everyone in the room was playing cards, not Poker, like you may think. They were playing a heated game of "Go Fish" on an ejaculation encrusted table.
Barret came in, sat on one of the beds and sighed. The south african man-whore came up to Barret and sat next to him. "What's wrong, Care-Bear?", he asked sympathetically.
Barret leaned on his shoulder,"It's nothing, Schmelly, Cloud just got all mad at me and stuff and hurt my feelings real bad. REAL BAD. Like, way down deep inside, where I'm soft, like a woman..."
Schmelly gasped, taken quite aback, as well as everyone else in the room. Schmelly patted Barret on the back,"It's okay Care-Bear, it takes time to heal, but it will heal...it will heal.
Barret smiled a smile of relief,"Thanks Schmelly...that makes me feel a lot better..." Suddenly, a danish man ran by the window screaming,"WOULD YOU LIKE SOME STRUDEL!". Yes, he was danish.
Care-Bear...err...Barret stuck around for a while longer and played Go Fish until the sun set. When suddenly, the building was lifted up from around them, causing the ground to shake savagely. Barret and the rest of the gang flew onto the ground and the cards were sprawled everywhere. Sergio ran out to the giant machine lifting the building off the ground screaming,"THREE DOLLAH! THREE DOLLAH!".
The machine places the building on a flat spead on the back of itself. There were gay men and she-males sprawled everywhere. Barret got up and knocked on the driver's door. It opened. "EXCUSE ME!", Barret started with a tude. "What, may I ask, do you think you're doing.
The man inside, responded,"It was an order directly from the Cheese Corporation. I'm just doing my job, buddy. So get out of here before I give you malaria!". The man pulled out one of the injector thingies and Barret scampered away. The machine drove off into the sunset.
Barret looked up at the sky and screamed,"DAMN YOU, CHEESE CORPORATION! DAAAAAAMMMMMNNNNN YYYYYOOOOOUUUU!!!!!"