Legal Disclaimers: I do not own Xena: Warrior Princess. I'm just borrowing them for a little fun. Mwahaha! Please don't sue me, cause I'm all poor and stuff. *sob sob*

Content Disclaimer: This piece of fiction deals will subtext. It's not that big of a deal, but it is there, so you have been warned. :)

Dedications: For Tashi, and Toby, and Skip, and all of my other friends. WOO!

Warning: Do not judge this fic until you get to the end. It's angsty, but just keep to the end, it isn't so bad then. That's all I'm saying.. I don't want to give the surprise ending away! :)


Xena's Pain

By: LadyWillow

Xena stood in the kitchen of her mother's inn, where she and Gabrielle had stopped for a visit. Xena was helping to prepare supper, which she had been roped quite unwillingly to do by Cyrene, so she could catch up with Gabrielle.

Slow tears moved down Xena's cheeks, and she left them unchecked. She knew that things were futile with her. Gabrielle would never lover her. Not the way Xena wanted her to. And the thing was, Xena didn't know if just having the bard's friendship was enough for her anymore.

She needed more.

An attempt to choke back a sob failed, and it was all Xena could do to keep at her task.

Gabrielle will never love me. She'll never want to kiss me, never want me to hold her at night. I have no purpose. The woman that I love with every fiber of my being, every bit of my soul, will never feel the same.
Xena steadied herself against the table, and tried to blink the stinging from her eyes.

So, what's left for me then? What could possibly begin to fill the void in my soul. Nothing. Only Gabrielle's love could make me complete. That's it. If I'm never going to be happy, then why live?

Xena sniffled a few times and continued to chop the vegetables slowly.

If I die, many people will miss me, including Gabrielle. But I hurt. And I'll hurt every day for the rest of my life. Do I really deserve that?

Closing her eyes, Xena raised the knife up, and brought it back down quickly and powerfully.







Slicing the onion in half.


Fin.

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