Chapter 6: The (Screwed up) Rescue

I Do not own Kirby or KFC.

Our Heroes were rushing to Metaknight's rescue. They didn't know what to expect, and the only way they knew he was still alive was that he was still screaming like a little girl. Spirits were high, Adrenaline was pumping, and the salty smell of sweat hung in the air like burning skin. They burst into a huge clearing that was surrounded by tall trees, and a sign reading, "Pay no attention to this sign". There in front of them was Metaknight being held in place by a whole slew of transparent chickens who were floating in the air. Everyone stood there staring like they had walked in on a someone in the bathtub. Finally, Metaknight yelled, "DON'T JUST STAND THERE, YOU MORONS! GET ME OUTTA HERE! THESE GUYS SMELL LIKE CHICKEN SH*T!!!" For the longest time, Everyone continued to stand there as the ghostly chickens began to peck Metaknight in the nether regions. Finally, Kirby asked, "Who are you? you look like chicken ghosts." One of the chickens replied, "Haven't you heard of us? We're Poultrygeists. The ghosts of scorned chickens who were decapitated and served as meals in a KFC restuarant. We stalk Popstar looking for revenge on anyone who we don't like." "Why don't you like Metaknight?" King Dedede inquired. "Because" said one of the poultrygeists, "He did the most horrible thing of all." "You mean..." said Tiff. "Yes" said another poultrygeist, "He did a bad imitation of Moby" Hearing this, Everybody had second thoughts about rescueing him. But only briefly. They all got into a huddle and began to talk about how to rescue Metaknight. "We could cook them." said Tuff. "That wouldn't work, you idiot!" said King Dedede, "They're already dead!" "Hey!!" said Kirby, "I've got a great idea. now listen carefully..."

***

It seemed there was no escape for Metaknight. The chickes were still pecking him down there, and he was ready to faint. Suddenly, Our five heroes appeared on the scene. "You'd better let Metaknight go, or else!" Said Kirby. "Or else what?" Sneered one of the poultrygeists. "Or else I will play this Wayne Newton CD until you beg for mercy!" "You wouldn't dare..." Said one of the ghostly chickens. Kirby turned the CD on at full blast. The chickens began to writhe on the ground in agony, screaming, "OH, PLEASE KILL IT! HE'S KILLING US!" Suddenly, a portal to H*ll opened up in the ground from the evilness of the CD. The chickens jumped in, breathing sighs of relief, at least until they hit the flames, then they were gone. Metaknight stood up. "Well, that WAS highly unorthodox, but you saved me. I will repay you somehow, someday. Then he was gone.

***

"MMMM!" said King Dedede, "Marshmallows taste much better when they're cooked over an open flame, with all kinds of flammable flora around you. He was finishing off his 3rd bag of marshmallows. Everyone was in high spirits over their victory over the evil poultrygeists. Tiff was snoozing quietly behind one of the logs at the campsite, Kirby was inhaling all the marshmallows off his stick, and Tuff was leaned back, chewing on a toothpick. The only sounds that could be heard were the sound of the fire crackling, Tiff's breathing, and the occasional belch from King Dedede or Kirby. Kirby stood up, Yawned and stretched, and said, "Well, I'm gonna go use the bushes. G'Night guys!" "G'night, Fuzzball." Said King Dedede. "Nighty-night." said Tuff. King Dedede looked at Tuff. "Belching doesn't offend you does it?" He said. "No" said Tuff. "Well, that's good, because this one's gonna shake all the leaves off the trees." King Dedede took a deep breath. He closed his eyes and held his stomach, which was rumbling at a steadily increasing volume. Then he said, "Ahem... mi, mi, mi, mi, mi...." He opened his mouth, and a huge, deep, powerful rip-roaring belch thundered out of him. "BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRR RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPP!!!" It was so loud, the leaves on the trees shook violently, and some fell off their stems and fluttered to the ground like it was Autumn in the middle of the summer. King Dedede rubbed his belly, licked his beak, and said, "Mmmmmm! Tastes like Marshmallows. "You are disgusting." said Tuff. Then he farted without warning and said, "Well that shut me up." Suddenly, The author(Me) appears to stir things up a little bit. "Hello!" I said, "What up?" "King Dedede looked at me with an evil grin. "How do?" He says, "Where's Hoshi? Isn't she usually following you around asking for a story about her?" "She's currently doing another fanfic at the moment." I said. "Which one?" Inquired King Dedede. I told him, "She's in the one called 'Dumb Dumber and Dumbest Kirby Fanfic'. She'll join us IF Kirbster says she can be in my story, and if she does say yes, it will be WHEN she gets some help for her insanity. (A/N: Hoshi is a charactar I made up for Kirbster's above mentioned fanfic. If you want to find out who she is, Read "Dumb, Dumber, and Dumbest Kirby Fanfic, It's really funny!) Then Tuff realized something, "Hey! Where's Kirby? He never left the bushes back there!" so we all crept back to the bushes, to see if maybe Kirby had eaten too many Marshmallows, (A/N: I know that Kirby eating too much is probably impossible, but you never know.) We pushed back the bush and found him......... reading the Playboy magazine he'd put in his backpack. "THAT'S MINE!!" said Tuff. "No it's not!" said Kirby, "You swiped it from Metaknight's campsite, Remember?" "WELL THAT MAKES IT MINE!" said Tuff. He tackled Kirby, and they began to roll across the ground, punching, kicking, biting, and all that good stuff.

***

Meanwhile, Deep in a different part of the woods, Metaknight was looking around for his stuff, just to make sure no one had stolen anything. "Let's see, I've got my food, my water, my clothes, my- AAAAAAAH!! WHERE'S MY MAGAZINE?" Metaknight suddenly had a thought. "Uh-oh, What if Kirby or his friends found that magazine?" "I've got to find them!" he said, "Or else my reputation as a serious warrior with no sense of humor will be ruined!! Metaknight dashed off into the woods like a cheetah on fire.

***

The fight was still going on in the clearing. Tuff and Kirby were still going strong, with King Dedede and me trying to separate the two of them. "I'LL TEACH YOU YOU TO TAKE MY MAGAZINE, YOU STINKIN' HYPOCRITE!!!" Yelled Tuff, as he belted Kirby across the face. "I'LL TEACH YOU TO TACKLE A STAR WARRIOR OVER A DIRTY MAGAZINE, YOU MOP-HEADED...... SISSY!!! Hearing this, Tuff got real mad and yelled, "SISSY?!?!?! SISSY?!?!?! I'LL SHOW YOU JUST WHAT A SISSY CAN DO, YOU PUFFY LITTLE BALL OF...... POOP!!!" By now, they were running out of insults, but still not running out of energy. "I'M NOT A DUNGBALL YOU UGLY FECES- COVERED......SLIMY......BOOGER-EATING......DUMB *SS!!!" Kirby punched Tuff in the stomach. So with the two of them rolling on the ground duking it out like two crazed pumas. Suddenly, (I say that word way too much!) someone exploded out of the clearing in a flurry of leaves. "OKAY!!!" The voice said, "GIVE ME THAT MAGAZINE, YOU COUPLE OF CROSS-DRESSING PUSBAGS!!!" Kirby and Tuff stopped fighting. They both looked at Metaknight and then at each other. "I'm willing to put my differences aside and whack him if you are." Tuff shook his hand, "Agreed." he said, and they began to walk towards Metaknight menacingly. "Uh- oh........" said Metaknight. He ran, with Tuff and Kirby in hot pursuit. Then suddenly, they heard a voice:

"Help me...... Please help me..................."

Everyone stopped. They all listened carefully.

"Help.............. I'm trapped in here, Help me................."

"What was that?" said Kirby. No one answered. the voice called to them again.

"I'm trapped in the well.................. Help................. I can't get out.......... help me..............."

They all began to look around for a well. It was far off in the distance, so they began to run while the voice called:

"Get me out of here.................... It's dark, and dank, and it smells moldy down here......... Help me......."

They found the well. Everyone was afraid to look down. The voice called to them again:

"Help me.......... I'm down at the bottom.......... throw me a rope........... It's cold and wet down here........."

For the longest time, Everone looked at each other, afraid to look down. Suddenly, King Dedede and Tiff appeared. "King Dedede!" said Tuff, "Did you- " "Yes, we heard it too." said King Dedede. They looked down..... And got the shock of their lives.

End of Chapter 6

Sorry it's so short. I'm trying to keep up with the demands of those who like my story^.^