Chapter 10
It was about a week later, only a few days before Winter Break, when my entire world got turned upside down.
No sooner had I gotten my books for my first few classes, I was called down to Father Dom's office. Little did I know that as soon as I walked through his office door would I have heart stomped on.
***
A/N: Y'all are going to hate me.
***
When I stepped into Father Dominic's office, I realized that Father Dom wasn't alone.
"Jesse?" I stared at him. Jesse was standing next to Father D's desk, looking more uneasy than I'd ever seen him. "What's going on?" I glanced at Father Dominic.
Father D cleared his throat. "I believe I'll leave the two of you alone." He left, shooting me an unreadable look.
"What's going on?" I repeated.
Jesse motioned to the chair in front of Father Dominic's desk. "Susannah, please, sit." His tone was one that I couldn't quite understand, but I sat, looking up at him.
"Jesse, what is it?"
He sat down in the chair beside me, taking my hand. "Susannah, listen to me. I have had quite a bit of time to think this over, and I." He sighed. "I don't think we should get married after all."
I dropped his hand as though it was on fire. "What?" My heart felt like it was being torn in half. "Why not?"
"I think that it would be best for both of us if we were no longer together," Jesse said firmly. "After what happened at the Agency-"
"What are you talking about?" I demanded, standing up quickly. "If anything, what happened at the Agency should make are relationship stronger, or whatever." I knew it sounded cheesy, but at the time I really didn't care.
"Susannah," Jesse said in his silky voice. "Susannah, look, you need to be with someone who is alive. You need to be with someone who can be with you, and take care of you." I wanted to slap him, I really did. And at the same time I wanted to burst into tears, too. But I kept them back as I stared at Jesse. "Jesse, I don't want anyone else, don't you get that? If I did, I wouldn't have proposed to you." I stepped forward but Jesse just took another step back. I dropped my hand that I'd held out. I turned away.
"Susannah." Jesse's voice trailed off. "I'm sorry," he said finally.
Anger flared up inside me even as I felt the tears start to flow. I refused to let Jesse see me crying over him, so I just, "You know what, Jesse? Do whatever you want. I don't care." Then I stormed out Father Dom's office and didn't look back.
***
I was miserable for the rest of the day. Jesse tried to come to me and apologize-not that he would have taken back what he said-but I just told him to get out and ignored him.
I buried my face in my pillow for the entire afternoon-well, okay, I'm not that pathetic. It just felt like the entire afternoon.
To be honest, I didn't really hate Jesse. Believe me, I wanted to. I wanted to kick and scream until the entire world knew that I hated Jesse de Silva. But the truth was, I didn't. Hate him, I mean. Because a part of me knew that he was right. I couldn't marry him.
It didn't make it hurt any less, though.
The day Jesse and I were supposed to get married came and went, of course. Jesse was smart enough not to try and see me on that day.
The wedding night passed, and I spent the night at CeeCee's, watching rented movies. I had no intention of spending that night in my bed, thank you.
When I got home the next morning, Jesse was waiting for me. He looked as hot as ever, sitting in my window seat.
"Susannah," he said softly when he saw me.
I cleared my throat. "What do you want, Jesse?"
"Where were you last night?" he asked, almost sounding like he cared one wit about where I spent the night that was supposed to be our wedding night.
I shrugged. "I was at CeeCee's,"
"Oh," he said. "I see."
"So what do you want?" I said again, sitting down on my bed and trying to pretend that I didn't care that he was there.
"I wanted to see how you were," Jesse answered simply.
"Well, I'm fine." I turned to fully face him. "You know what? I've never been better," I said sarcastically. "All I want to know is-" I couldn't finish my sentence. The tears were starting to fall down my cheeks, but I really didn't care. "How could you?" I finally asked.
"Susannah," Jesse came to be and held me tightly against him. "I'm sorry. I truly am. But I think that this is the best for both of us."
I glared at him, pushing away. "How is it the best?" I demanded. "Because this way you don't have to deal with having a wife? Because this way you won't have to deal with me?" My voice rose, but I didn't care.
Jesse's gaze darkened. "No, of course not. You don't understand."
I stood up. "No, I understand perfectly. You just don't know what's good for you." My jaw clenched. "Get out."
"Susannah-"
"Now."
He dematerialized, leaving me to cry in peace.
***
A/N: I know I'm evil. I'm sorry. It's all going to turn out all right in the end, I promise!
It was about a week later, only a few days before Winter Break, when my entire world got turned upside down.
No sooner had I gotten my books for my first few classes, I was called down to Father Dom's office. Little did I know that as soon as I walked through his office door would I have heart stomped on.
***
A/N: Y'all are going to hate me.
***
When I stepped into Father Dominic's office, I realized that Father Dom wasn't alone.
"Jesse?" I stared at him. Jesse was standing next to Father D's desk, looking more uneasy than I'd ever seen him. "What's going on?" I glanced at Father Dominic.
Father D cleared his throat. "I believe I'll leave the two of you alone." He left, shooting me an unreadable look.
"What's going on?" I repeated.
Jesse motioned to the chair in front of Father Dominic's desk. "Susannah, please, sit." His tone was one that I couldn't quite understand, but I sat, looking up at him.
"Jesse, what is it?"
He sat down in the chair beside me, taking my hand. "Susannah, listen to me. I have had quite a bit of time to think this over, and I." He sighed. "I don't think we should get married after all."
I dropped his hand as though it was on fire. "What?" My heart felt like it was being torn in half. "Why not?"
"I think that it would be best for both of us if we were no longer together," Jesse said firmly. "After what happened at the Agency-"
"What are you talking about?" I demanded, standing up quickly. "If anything, what happened at the Agency should make are relationship stronger, or whatever." I knew it sounded cheesy, but at the time I really didn't care.
"Susannah," Jesse said in his silky voice. "Susannah, look, you need to be with someone who is alive. You need to be with someone who can be with you, and take care of you." I wanted to slap him, I really did. And at the same time I wanted to burst into tears, too. But I kept them back as I stared at Jesse. "Jesse, I don't want anyone else, don't you get that? If I did, I wouldn't have proposed to you." I stepped forward but Jesse just took another step back. I dropped my hand that I'd held out. I turned away.
"Susannah." Jesse's voice trailed off. "I'm sorry," he said finally.
Anger flared up inside me even as I felt the tears start to flow. I refused to let Jesse see me crying over him, so I just, "You know what, Jesse? Do whatever you want. I don't care." Then I stormed out Father Dom's office and didn't look back.
***
I was miserable for the rest of the day. Jesse tried to come to me and apologize-not that he would have taken back what he said-but I just told him to get out and ignored him.
I buried my face in my pillow for the entire afternoon-well, okay, I'm not that pathetic. It just felt like the entire afternoon.
To be honest, I didn't really hate Jesse. Believe me, I wanted to. I wanted to kick and scream until the entire world knew that I hated Jesse de Silva. But the truth was, I didn't. Hate him, I mean. Because a part of me knew that he was right. I couldn't marry him.
It didn't make it hurt any less, though.
The day Jesse and I were supposed to get married came and went, of course. Jesse was smart enough not to try and see me on that day.
The wedding night passed, and I spent the night at CeeCee's, watching rented movies. I had no intention of spending that night in my bed, thank you.
When I got home the next morning, Jesse was waiting for me. He looked as hot as ever, sitting in my window seat.
"Susannah," he said softly when he saw me.
I cleared my throat. "What do you want, Jesse?"
"Where were you last night?" he asked, almost sounding like he cared one wit about where I spent the night that was supposed to be our wedding night.
I shrugged. "I was at CeeCee's,"
"Oh," he said. "I see."
"So what do you want?" I said again, sitting down on my bed and trying to pretend that I didn't care that he was there.
"I wanted to see how you were," Jesse answered simply.
"Well, I'm fine." I turned to fully face him. "You know what? I've never been better," I said sarcastically. "All I want to know is-" I couldn't finish my sentence. The tears were starting to fall down my cheeks, but I really didn't care. "How could you?" I finally asked.
"Susannah," Jesse came to be and held me tightly against him. "I'm sorry. I truly am. But I think that this is the best for both of us."
I glared at him, pushing away. "How is it the best?" I demanded. "Because this way you don't have to deal with having a wife? Because this way you won't have to deal with me?" My voice rose, but I didn't care.
Jesse's gaze darkened. "No, of course not. You don't understand."
I stood up. "No, I understand perfectly. You just don't know what's good for you." My jaw clenched. "Get out."
"Susannah-"
"Now."
He dematerialized, leaving me to cry in peace.
***
A/N: I know I'm evil. I'm sorry. It's all going to turn out all right in the end, I promise!
