Angel Boy
Chapter 3/?
A 7th Heaven Fan Fic by Lucky Star

Chapter 3: Wandering

Escaping from Alcatraz had to be easier than getting out of Kevin's apartment. The floor creaked, the door over the steps moaned. I held my breath, willed Kevin to stay asleep. He had to be awake, he couldn't possibly sleep through all the creaking and groaning. He didn't move. His chest rose in an even rhythm. Maybe he's a heavy sleeper.

I crept slowly down the stairs and into the garage. Shadows created horrific looking creatures on the walls. The car looked like some sort of scary movie prop. My blood rushed in my ears and I just wanted out. Had to get out.

The cold night air blasted me in the face. Icy fingers clawed at my throat. I almost couldn't breathe. I didn't realise the night would be so cold. Or maybe it was my heart.

I looked up at the house. The attic windows glowed almost magically, like some warm scene in a Christmas picture book. I sighed and looked down at the ground, and my feet moving step by step, away from the house.

I didn't know where I was going, only that I had to go. Had to keep walking. Until the chill reached my bones and I couldn't take another step. My knees went out, my legs folded. I knew I could easily die right there, by the side of the road, and I didn't care. I couldn't go home. Couldn't look them in the eye knowing what I know. Not just Josh. But the lies.

Lies. My whole life. Lies. Why? Why didn't they tell me? There's no reason, nothing I can think that would justify not telling me. If I had known...I would have understood the loneliness. I wouldn't have wondered every day what was wrong with me that I felt so disconnected.

They should have told me!

"Don't hate them, Simon," I heard a voice, like a whisper on the wind, except there was no wind. The effort of raising my head almost took too much. He stood a few feet from me, in Khaki pants and a plaid button down shirt. "They only meant to protect you."

"Josh?" I knew it wasn't real, couldn't be real. Hallucinating. I had to be hallucinating.

He nodded, his hair falling out of place just a little. "They love you, Simon."

"No. They don't. They lied to me."

"They protected you."

"How? How are they protecting me?" I screamed with more strength than I knew I had left.

Josh sighed. Frustrated. Irritated. "In time you will understand." He faded, like a dream. There, then gone. Looking every bit as real as me, every bit as solid as any other person, then faded, almost transparent, and finally gone. Poof. Just gone.

My head fell to the ground. Exhausted. Too tired to move. Just lay here and sleep. Cold. I don't care. Shivering. Teeth clattering. Vibrating. Head ache. I don't care. I want to die. Let me lay here until I die.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

I felt like I was flying. Weightless. Free. Surrounded by soft blue sky and fluffy white clouds. And Josh was with me, with angel wings and a golden halo. How corny is that? As soon as I thought it, Josh disappeared and I knew I wasn't flying. Someone was carrying me.

"Is he okay?" I heard the words, recognized the voice, struggled to put a name with it. Lucy. Of course it would be Lucy.

"I don't know. We need to get him to a doctor." Kevin. Kevin was carrying me. Lucy and Kevin, saving me from myself. Again.

I heard Lucy's footsteps quicken. "But he is breathing, right?"

"Yes, he's breathing, Lucy." Kevin sighed. He seemed annoyed. At me? Or Lucy? I wasn't sure. Probably both.

He put me in the back seat of his jeep. I lay as he left me, afraid to move because I didn't want them to know I was awake. I didn't want to be awake. I wanted to see Josh again. Even if it wasn't real. He was real, and he was a part of me. He always had been. I just never knew it until now.

"We should call my parents."

"I know."

Panic rose like bile in my throat. I reached out, struggled to sit up. "No!" Their faces moved in front of my eyes like confetti in a kaleidoscope. I tried, but couldn't focus on either of them. I felt dizzy.

"Simon, you need to see a doctor. Your parents need to know."

"No. Please. Just take me back to your apartment. I'll be okay."

I didn't have to see clearly to know he shook his head. "No, Simon. You're not okay."

"What is going on with you anyway?" Lucy asked.

"Nothing. I went for a walk. Since when is that a crime?" I could feel myself getting weaker as I talked. I couldn't get much weaker than I already was.

"Since you passed out drunk in the kitchen and then you passed out cold by the side of the road where anyone could come along and run you over or worse."

Kevin. Always the voice of reason. Only it wasn't Kevin. It was Josh. Sitting in the front seat, where Kevin had just been. I blinked, and Kevin was there again. I sighed and curled up on the seat. My head throbbed with unbearable pain and I couldn't coordinate my hands to cradle it. Not that that would help anyway. I just wanted to cover my face and cry.

"Just take me home." I whispered. "I just want to go home." But I didn't want to go home. I wanted to go anywhere but home.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

End chapter three. Please let me know how you like it. Thanks! Lucky Star (JjsLuckyStar@aol.com)