She sighed. Why did she always do this?

She felt a tiny hand squeeze her own, and a soft little voice spoke. "Mommy? Where did Azumi go?"

'One. Two. Three. Four…'

Aya exhaled loud and long, counting to ten. She felt this calmed her down, especially when her little daughter and son would drive her up the wall. She loved them dearly, there was no doubt about that, but sometimes…sometimes…

"Miss Aya! I found her!"

Grabbing a tight hold on her son, she took off in the direction of Nita's voice. "Come Shinji, let's go get your sister."

Nita was her maid. Not that she could afford one, she was a single mother after all. But it was for that reason itself, that the Aogiri Family took it upon themselves to take care of her little family. She had stayed in contact with Suzumi and her Father. Like always, they had treated her like she was family, never once turning her down when she needed help. She felt embarrassed and ashamed at first, having to depend on them so much, but it was obvious she needed them. She couldn't raise her children completely alone.

She had twins. A boy and a girl. It was poetic wasn't it? The mention of Aki still cut her deep; even up to now, almost 5 years later…

As much as it pained her, reviving old memories, she couldn't help but feel grateful and full of joy at the fact that she was blessed with twins. If she and Aki couldn't live their lives together as brother and sister, she was dead sure her children would.

"Here she is! I found her, crawling around on all fours, like a little kitten, under the chairs…"

Aya smiled, and giggled lightly as she felt Shinji let go and attempt to pry his sister from underneath the terminal arrival chairs. They reminded her so much of her life with Aki. They looked so much alike like she and Aki had. Except for their hair of course. Shinji was a very fair boy, his hair, golden and bright in the light, while his older sister Azumi had a rich cherry tone and just a hint of blonde highlights in them. Everyone said they looked exactly like her and Aki did. The only difference was their eyes. They had his eyes…

She shook her head, trying to hold back what she knew would soon be tears if her mind kept heading where it started. It had taken her years to get over…his death. But it still pained her to think about it. Even saying his name brought her to tears, let alone thinking it. For months, she was a wreck, crying constantly. She couldn't take it, couldn't take the loss of losing her love. She couldn't live without him, life just wasn't worth it. It got to the point where she almost took her life…but, he stopped her.

Yuuhi, who was always there for her. Yuuhi who gave her unconditional love, even at all costs, and knowing that she may not return it…He told her never to give up, that Tooya would never her want her to. If she couldn't live for herself, she had to live for her children. Tooya would've wanted that. She felt ashamed that Yuuhi had to tell her that, that she didn't realize it herself. Yuuhi left a few days after, for what reasons, she never did get the answers to, but his words were always in her head, always in her mind. She felt selfish and incredibly unfair to her children. How could she have forgotten them like that? How could she think of nothing but herself, and not them? How could she have abandoned them, and not love them?

Ever since then, she had shown nothing but love and care for them. That was all she had to give, and it was enough for them. Cause that was all they needed. Her love.

"Shin-jiiiiiiiiii! Let go!"

"No!"

"I'm gonna tell mom!"

"Mom's right there and she's already mad at you!"

"No she's not!"

"Yes she is!"

"Hey! You two! Before you drive me and your mother crazy, get out from under there this instant!"

"But Nita…"

Aya closed her eyes, a sigh falling from her lips. She loved them. She really did.

She smiled, kneeling in front of her two little angels who had started a tug-of-war with Azumi's right arm. "Alright you two, settle down, before your Aunt Suzumi comes and see how evil you two really are…"

She chuckled, as her children give her identical little pouts with an in-chorus. "Mom!"