"Stage Fights" by Quidditch, Anyone?

NOTE: This is such a stupid title, I'll admit. Suggestions on a new one?


Croutons


Was it a choking bird? Was it a crashing plane? No, it was Ron Weasley trying to high notes, Harry thought irritably while doodling splotches on his Charms essay. Hermione sat opposite him at their usual table in the Common Room. Ron was all the way up in his dormitory. He was three stories higher up (Three!), but his lil' Oliver voice rang all the way down. Harry grew more and more frustrated.


"You know what the only thing more annoying than someone practicing for musical is, Hermione?" he asked.


"Let me guess... when the inside of your nose itches, but you don't want to scratch it because people will think you're picking it instead?" Hermione responded without looking up from her mountain of work.


Harry looked at her oddly for a moment, but stopped as he got back on track. "A teenage boy signing two octaves higher than he should while his voice is in the middle of the 'cracking stage'."


"Most amusing, Harry," she responded.


Just then the twins walked in with cheery grins and a cardboard box.


"Yo, yo, yo! Merry Christmas!" Fred said. His duplicate set down the box and started producing handfuls of some different colored, fuzzy disks.


"Now, as we've all been acquainted with our little brother's, er, hidden talent," Fred continued.


"Rather, trying to reverse the acts of nature by screeching like a mad banshee," George put in.


"We've decided it's time to introduce our newest product. Bam-badah-BAH!"


George started tossing the fuzzums over the heads of Gryffindors. "Musical-Muting Muffs!"


Harry and Hermione each caught a wooly pair of orange and blue earmuffs. Harry was more than willing to try his one, and judging by the extremely tranquil look on his face, they worked.


"Very clever, boys," Hermione smirked as more and more people tried out the product. "But don't you think Ron's feeling might just be a touch crumpled to pieces when he finds out you have made a product designed to block out, oh, something like... the sound of his voice?"


"Not at all," Fred told her matter-of-factly.


"It's all profits, Hermy. Something as insignificant as Ronnie's feeling shouldn't get in our way of making millions, now, should it?" George continued in a mock business-like tone.


"Besides, we all know the only one who'll be offended is you, since you're mad about our brother," Fred said nonchalantly.


Hermione felt itchy and red. "I do not! Just because I'm concerned about his feelings, it doesn't mean it has any sort of impact on my feelings-"


"And what sort of feelings might that be, Hermy?" Fred couldn't resist.


"Oh, geezum!" She looked furious at herself. "You know what you what you can do with those earmuffs, don't you?"


"What's that?" he asked.


"Next time wear them when you're trying to pick up a girl... it'll draw attention away from that huge zit on your nose."


·~··~··~·


Oh, the drama! The music! The singing! Too bad the only people in the Great Hall were two teachers, the redheaded actor, and Hermione. Most people had something better to do on this Friday night.


Ron finished a piece with one last, low note. The music stopped and Hermione beamed at him. He smiled back and the teachers, Professors DeMarlo and McGonagall, dismissed him from that night's rehearsal.


"You're so fantastic, Ron!" Hermione praised. Ron turned pink.


"It was just a rehearsal. I'm sure by the time the play is actually ready, I'll be much better," he smirked. He was so funny when he tried to show off.


The two entered the now dark Great Hall to grab a last bite to eat. The room was practically deserted by now, so they as they sat down they were completely alone.


"S'all cold now," Ron whined.


"Ah, well... still good," Hermione said as she filled her plate with a dainty salad.


A few seconds went by with just the clinking of silverware. Then suddenly Ron asked, "Why didn't you try out for the play, too?"


Hermione laughed. Not a dry laugh, but just the opposite, when you feel as if you're about to pee your pants. "Right, Ron-O!"


"I'm serious," he smiled at her. "I think you'd be really good at it!"


Hermione, now flushed in the face, sat straightly and continued her meal of rabbit food. "No. Honestly, you wouldn't want to see such a thing."


"You know, there's still a part open, if you're interested." Ron raised his eyebrows slyly at her.


"I'd rather scalp myself, and you look like owl with an itchy nose when you do that."


Ron dropped his fork. "Try out," he commanded, all serious and very unRonish, like a general.


"Nothing on Earth would make me."


"What about a dare?"


"A dare?" Hermione questioned. She scraped one of her teeth to check for stray yucky green stuff. Normally she'd be more ladylike, but it was dark and only Ron.


"Yup." Then the needle in time stopped. Something totally unexpected, out of the blue, and unremarkable happened. "Try out for the play, or kiss me."


Clank.


"What?"


Ron smiled. If he had blushed, she wouldn't have been able to tell as it was so dark.


"I'm going to make you try out for the play, or you're going to have to kiss me. Something you'd never do in a million years, so you'll have to do the first thing."


Oh, bloody.


Hermione just laughed it off with a "Right, like I'd ever do that" or something or other and kept her face in her plate. Ron grinned like he was being clever (which, then again, he was) and finished his meal. Then he popped out of his chair and gave a very happy "Good night!" before disappearing.


Hermione stayed in the Great Hall for a long time, munching one crouton after another. Maybe she thought they would get her drunk or something, because she must have consumed at least a hundred before going to bed with the scene on permanent Replay and shaking hands.





Thanks to all my fantablulouslyextraordinary readers who bothered to say nice things and make me all happy:

Funkiechick- no arguments here- he IS a hottie...

CurlsofGold- now, really, could you honestly see Hermy pants signing in a play? Well, then again, Ron would be just as unlikely... now I'm all confused and such!

Jaffacake- okay, okay! It's updated! I promise, cross my heart, hope to fly, the next chapter will come soon, too, just for you, hun.

Adnap Nottap- EXTRA- SUPER praise for you! After reading that review, people must have thought I had a little too much 'cough medicine', because I'm sure I had very much of a stupid grin on my face all day.

Laurie Lupin- Oh, stop, I'm blushing all Ronny red.

GinnyWPotter- You're one of those 'odd folk', ain't ya?

mini veela- No idea... I haven't even read the book...


Don't you love reading your name in print? I sure do...


Oh yeah, oh yeah... again, sorry times a million for not updating- I've been having a pretty bad November in general, but in a few days I'll be all Christmas spirity and happy again, which means more yummy chapters to come. (Is it just me, or am I seriously beginning to get a little wacked in the head? Ehr, tough luck for me.)